My Favorite Explosion

I woke up to the sound of steady beeping and the smell of bleach. I knew exactly where I was and I was not happy about it. My head was pounding and there was a sharp pain going through my left wrist. I sighed knowing the signs of what might have happened but feared opening my eyes to find out who was sitting next to my bed holding my hand. It could be Mike which would be absolutely fine, or it could be Vic. Which I was not okay with dealing with today considering the outburst I had earlier on with Mike. I took a deep breath and slowly opened my eyes letting myself get adjusted to the light. I looked down to see who was slumped over my bed, unable to see from the hood covering their head. I lifted up my left arm seeing it in a soft cast, a bad sign but better than I was expecting and pushed back their hood. I was relieved to see it wasn’t a long haired brown eyed boy. I noticed the backwards hat first, giving it away that it was Mike, and then I saw the bruise beginning to form on his right jaw line. Oopsies.
“Michael, wake up” I sighed poking his neck
He slowly stirred picking his head up and wiping his hand over his face. “Oh, you’re awake” he mumbled
“Yea, I just woke up. What happened and why am I in the hospital?”
“Scar, that was terrifying. What was that?”
“Well Mikey, if you tell me what you saw me do, I can probably tell you what it was”
“You tensed up and started hyperventilating and suddenly it looked as if you has stopped breathing and then you fell and you smacked your head on the floor and I’m not sure what happened to your hand I heard some weird crack noise. Scar, what the fuck was that?”
“It was an anxiety attack Mike. I get them sometimes. They usually don’t end that bad. They actually never have gotten that bad. I got too worked up and I couldn’t relax myself fast enough. So when you thought you saw me stop breathing? I did. Not for long, just long enough for my breathing to reset itself. I should have woken up after that but being that I hit my head, that makes sense.” I said nodding.
“Does that happen often?” He asked inquisitively
“It depends on how stressed out I am. You got me pretty riled up earlier.”
“No doll face, you did that to yourself”
I sighed, knowing he was right. “I didn’t wanna tell you like that Mikey” I said a tear falling down my face.
“What the hell happened to you out there Scar?” Mike asked wiping the tear from my face, concern thick in his voice and written on his face. “Does anyone know what happened? Or am I the first person you told?”
“Can we talk about it later Mike? I really don’t wanna talk about it here. I promise I’ll tell you everything; I just don’t wanna do it in a hospital where anyone can hear me. I just wanna get out of here and go home.”
“Okay” He nodded. “That’s fine, I can do that. The nurse was saying before that as long as you woke up on your own you could go home tonight”
“Oh thank god” I sighed “I fucking hate hospitals” I laughed. The nurse walked into my room right as I said that
“But good news, everything came back normal. As long as you were able to wake up on your own you are free to go. I just have to print out your discharge instructions and you’ll be free to go”
“So no concussion? What’s going on with my hand? Do you have a doctor you recommend I see? These are things I need to know”
“Let me get the doctor for you” She said with a fake smile and walked out.
“Scarlett,” Mike started
“Michael, I’m a fucking paramedic, I’m not stupid. My wrist is on fire and I need to make sure I don’t have a concussion from hitting my head. We have drinking to do tonight” I laughed
He laughed shaking his head and sighed, “I’m really glad you’re okay Scar. That was really fucking scary”

I shrugged my shoulders at him, “It happens all the time Mike, just never this bad” He just stared at me in shock of how calm I was about the whole situation, “Like I said Mike, I’ll explain once we get me out of here” He nodded signifying he was content with my answer when the doctor walked in. He was an older Asian man who looked as if he had been doing this for quite some time. He explained that when I fell I twisted my arm into some contorted position meaning I managed to fracture it and wouldn’t be able to go back to work for longer than I had originally intended on being out. Mike had gotten me a change of clothes before he left so I could change when we left. I signed all the necessary paperwork I needed to and finally was able to leave this god forsaken place of a hospital. Mike pulled his car up to the entrance and unlocked the doors as I walked over. I sat down in the passenger seat, put my seatbelt on and looked over towards my best friend.
“Alright Scarlett Olivia Carlile,” I cringed at the use of my full name, “You have a lot of fucking explaining to do”.
“I know, Mikey. But not while you’re driving. Just get me the fuck home” I said faking a laugh as we left the parking lot.


I woke up to the smell of a hospital. I couldn’t describe it, but it just had a smell to it. A mixture of bleach, sickness and death. Three things that smelled terrible on their own, but even worse when all mixed together. I looked around the room, trying to remember how and why I had gotten here. There were bandages going up my right forearm and I could feel them on my left thigh as well. I had an IV in my left forearm with a medication running, the name I couldn’t make out without my glasses on. Probably some type of pain killer since I couldn’t feel anything except the pounding in my head. Was I in a car accident? No. I don’t remember driving a car recently now that I thought about it. Danny never let me drive. He always drove me where I needed to go. My mouth was really dry, I needed something to drink. I patted down the bed with my right arm looking for the call bell to ask the nurse for some water, finally finding it, I held the button for a few seconds to make sure it went through. Two nurses, an aid and the doctor came walking in within seconds. I definitely was not expecting that.
“Ms. Carlile, nice to see you’re still with us.” The doctor stated matter-of-factly.
“is there a reason I shouldn’t be doc?” I asked confused with everything that was going on.
“Do you know why you’re in the hospital Scarlett?” he asked in shock.
“Not a clue doc. Care to tell me?” I chuckled.
“Scarlett, you were brought to the emergency room three days ago after overdosing on xanax, your blood alcohol level was zero point two four. That’s triple the legal limit. And you had lost about three pints of blood.”
My sarcasm came to an abrupt stop after hearing what the doctor told me. I was in shock and speechless. I had no clue what to say, or how to respond.
“Ms. Carlile, I have to ask you some questions.” He said sitting at the foot of the bed, shooing out the extra personnel. I nodded at his request, knowing where this was about to go. “Were you trying to kill yourself Ms. Carlile?”
“Yes” I whispered, ashamed of what I had done to myself knowing how disappointed my brother and best friend would be in me.
“You don’t have to tell me, but perhaps I would be able to make your transfer later on a bit easier. Was there a reason for you doing this?”
I wasn’t sure how to answer his question at first. Do I tell him about what’s been going on, or do I keep it in the dark for longer. Things couldn’t get any worse really, so I decided to open up about my problems for once instead of running from them.
“You got some time doc? It’s been a long few years”
“As much time as you need Scarlett” He said with a warm smile.
All it took was that warm smile the doctor gave me and everything came spilling out. It was like word vomit, I couldn’t hold it in anymore. Even if the doctor didn’t actually care, it felt nice to talk about it and get it out in the open where something could be done about it. I hoped at least.

Notes

By the way guys, this is the second chapter I posted today so make sure you read the revious one first!!!