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I Am Not Alright, and I Would Rather

I Wanna Make You Feel Wanted

~*POV Vic*~

I took a shaky breath as I looked over at my mom, she was looking so beautiful today. Her dress was very classic and flattered her figure. She smiled up at me and put her hand on my shoulder.

"Calm down mijo," she said soothingly, "You have nothing to be afraid of, he loves you and you love him, that's all that matters."

I took another breath, she's right, today is for me and Jaime. Today Jaime becomes my husband. That's all that matters really, an atomic bomb could off and it wouldn't matter, today is ours. I smiled back at my mother.

"You're right," I said, "I'm so glad you're here to celebrate with me."

She chuckled slightly, "I just needed time. Once I saw how happy you were, I realized I'd be a horrible mother to not approve. I just wish your father agreed with me..."

I sighed, frowning slightly, "I do too... I really miss him..."

She gave me a small half smile, "Don't think about that today, you're supposed to be happy. Maybe when you two get back from your honeymoon we'll all go talk to him..."

I gave her a small smile, "Thanks mom, it seems like today is going to be perfect..."

She smiled widely at me, "I'm glad Vic, you deserve this, enjoy it."

I smiled even bigger, we do deserve this. This is the beginning of our life together, the best times of our lives.

"Are you guys ready?" Austin asked, walking through the door, "It's just about time."

I nodded at him before mom and I followed him out of the room and into the hall. I heard piano music playing in the background. I couldn't see the ballroom yet though, we were still behind closed doors.

I felt my heart start beating faster as the music suddenly changed, signaling it was time for us to walk down the aisle. My groomsmen went first of course, they thought it was funny that they had to walk the aisle, Kellin suggested that I just call them 'bridesmaids' instead. I smacked him for that.

Oliver was the first to go, followed by Kellin, then finally Austin. When Austin made it to the front, it was my turn. I took a nervous breath before taking my mom's arm, I wanted to make this as traditional as possible, therefore my mom was giving me away. She gave me a supportive smile as we stepped out into the ballroom. I was pleasantly surprised at the view, I couldn't help but smile wider.

The decorations themselves were very plain, but together, they we perfect. Elegant and beautiful. There big pieces of glitter scattered across the aisle, causing an eye catching contrast from the dark, hardwood flooring. At the front leg of each aisle seat was a large wax candle, the height of each one varied, giving it an oldened look. Tied to the side of each chair was a small bouquet of dainty white flowers, placed in a paper cone. Upon closer inspection, I discovered that the paper cones were made of sheet music, a personal touch for Jaime and I.

The large bay windows were covered with a thick layer of white chiffon curtains, giving the illusion that it was early evening instead of afternoon. At the end of the aisle there were two white pillars, each decorated with the candles and flowers from before. The priest was standing in front of a white chiffon canopy, which was also filled with candles. Together everything fit perfectly, it was truly beautiful.

I looked at the people standing at the head of the aisle. I looked at Jaime's groomsmen, with the intention of saving my husband to be for last. From left to right stood, Tony, Cam and finally Mike. I felt mom's grip on my arm tighten, perhaps she noticed her estranged son, standing right next to Cam. I felt guilt and more nerves fill my stomach as I thought of mom and Mike's reunion. She'd probably be quite upset with him, something I couldn't be if I tried.

But my thoughts of mom and Mike quickly vanished as my eyes fell upon Jaime and the way he was smiling at me. I felt myself grin even wider back at him, I probably looked like a fool, but I can't help it, he just looks so beautiful standing there in his tux, I can't help but stare. His eyes eventually meet mine, causing my knees to go weak. If it weren't for mom, I probably would've froze, completely content with spending the rest of my life in his eyes.

But I kept walking. The time it took me to walk the aisle seemed to take years, decades even. I just want to be married to him already, I want to be his and I want him to be mine. I know we already belong to each other, but after today, we'll have proof.

After an eternity of walking, we were there and I was face to face with my Jaime. He just smiled and gazed at me, holding out his hand. Mom removed her arm from mine before picking up my hand and placing it in Jaime's.

"Take care of my baby," she said, winking at him.

He just nodded at her before bringing my hand to his lips for a gentle kiss. Even though I was used to the feeling of his lips, they still caused me to go crazy every time.

"Ladies, gentlemen. Friends and family," the priest began, "We are gathered here today to witness and celebrate the fusion of two lives into one."

He paused for a moment before continuing, "Victor Fuentes and Jaime Preciado were lucky enough to find their other halves in each other. That's why we're here, to celebrate the love these two people share. Now, I believe the couple has prepared their own vows, Victor would you like to begin?"

I took a deep breath before I began. I was nervous yes, but I know that Jaime will still love me even if I mess up, "Jaime Alberto what can I say? I love you more than anything in the entire world, and you that I'd fall apart without you. You've been right by my side through everything. We've shared the happy moments, and you were my rock for the not so happy ones. I'd hate to say it was love at first sight, but I knew as soon as I met you, that you were special. As William Shakespeare once wrote; “When I saw you, I fell in love. And you smiled because you knew.”

I paused for a second to turn to Austin, he had the ring. He flashed me one of his million dollar smiles as I took it. I turned back to Jaime and saw his eyes watering, mine had stayed pretty dry so far, but seeing him getting emotional sort of triggered the tears. I took another deep breath before continuing;

"With this ring I promise to stay by your side, through thick and thin, to hell and back if necessary. I promise to take care of you when you’re sick or hurt. I promise to stand by you even if you mess up, because we’re only humans and everyone makes mistakes. On our one year anniversary, I made a promise to never hurt you, this me keeping that promise. I love you."

With that, I slipped the silver band on his left ring finger, doing my best to keep my hands from shaking. Yes I was relieved that I didn't mess up my vows, but I won't be truly calm until we're officially married.

"And Jaime?" the priest asked, turning to him.

Jaime smiled and met my eyes before beginning his vows, "Victor Vincent, I can honestly say I love every single thing about you. I love your smile, your laugh, the way your eyes light up when I tell you I love you. I love the way your hair curls underneath your hats. I love your secret obsession with old western movies. I love your snide, sarcastic remarks you only say when you think I’m not listening. I love you so much more than words can ever describe. I'm nothing without you, and I'm here to prove it."

He stopped talking to turn around to Tony, I assumed he was getting the ring, my ring. Thinking about what Jaime had already said caused a few tears to fall from my eyes, happy tears of course, I'm so happy and in love I can't even contain myself.

I felt a gentle touch on my cheek. I looked up to see Jaime wiping the tears off of my face. I could've 'aw'ed' out loud at the look on his face as he did. But instead I just smiled and brought my hand up to meet his.

"I don't know what I’d do without you and I hope I never have to find out," he continued, slipping the ring onto my finger, "You’re all I’ve ever wanted, and that’s how I want to make you feel. With this ring, I promise to make you feel wanted."

I noticed that he had started crying also by the the last line. I smiled lovingly and looked up at him, there's just something about being in his presence that just made me feel good. I meant every word of my vows, I love him with every essence of my being.

"Now before I pronounce you married partners, I have one more thing I want you to do. Your wedding day is one that seems to fly. It's a day filled with emotion, friends, rings and dances. Many people remember how fleeting their own wedding day was. So I want you to take a few seconds to look into each others' eyes. Think about the happiness that you're feeling in this place, in this moment. Really let that feeling register in your heart and your mind."

He paused, allowing us to do just that. The eye contact from before remained. Even though I'm a crying mess right now, it's honestly the happiest I've ever been.

"Now, I want you to think about your life together in twenty years. Where are you? What are you doing? We all know that your visions of the future are not identical, but always complimentary."

I try to imagine twenty years from now, but I'm not doing a very good job at it. The only thing I know for sure is that I'll be somewhere with Jaime, and that's all that matters. I wonder what Jaime's thinking. I look up at him and see his eyes are partially glazed over, like he's thinking. He's also smiling, the same grin that hasn't left his face since I saw him.

"John Lennon once said, 'A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together, that is reality.' That new reality starts now. I pronounce you husband and husband, you may now kiss."

Jaime put his hands on my neck and leaned down to meet my lips. The kiss was passionate yet sweet. In that moment, nothing else mattered. Not the future, not the past. Just right now, just my Jaime and me. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Notes

Title Cred: Hunter Hayes (Yeah... My country side's showing... I'm not even sorry...)

At one point while writing this, I was typing out the word 'gentle' but I accidentally wrote 'genital' instead. I was so tempted to keep it like that... xD

So, I'm incredibly proud of this chapter. I think I did exactly what I said I was going to do, make it perfect. :D

Over 2,000 views guys, I can't even :o <3

Comments

I fucking loved this story you are a natural talent!!!! :)

Tori Fuentes Tori Fuentes
2/18/14

Holly crap... I cried... Man this is sad... Very fucking sad... NOOOOOOOOOOOO! WHY DID YOU MAKE ME CRY!? I LOVED THE STORY BUT WHY DID YOU MAKE ME CRY!? *sits down in a corner and sobs for the ready of eternity*

Okaay...I imagined real life tony dying in a hospital bed...I instantly started crying at the thought of losing someone I looked up to. This seriously broke me heart <\3 why end it so sadly? ;_;

You really fucking like killing my feelings don't ya? First it was the one before with I think it was Vic's sudden death and now this? Oh you could write a horror novel and make me buy it and then get the living flying fucks scared outta meand make me wanna cry because of the attachment you create with the readers. Oh your an amazing writer but your killing my feeling now. ;~;
Honesty's_Lies_ Honesty's_Lies_
11/12/13
@xMareBear14x
Your welcome I hope you write more books though
Janese Janese
10/17/13