Running

It was mid October and everything was going great. Mike and I hit our three year mark and he visited multiple colleges with me. Abbey had her first doctor’s appointment and Casey was actually really supportive of her keeping their baby. My grades that were once slipping were now nearly as amazing as our cheer team was doing. My dad was going to be getting out of rehab in November. My mom’s boyfriend was slowly moving in with us and I actually really liked him. Lucy was finally liter box trained completely and stopped peeing on my carpet. I hadn’t relapsed from my eating disorder in what felt like ages, and I was back up to a healthy weight. Finally, stress was gone from my mind regarding everything and I could just live a peaceful life.

I laid back in the bath tub, in Mike and Vic’s bathroom while Mike played drums in his bedroom. We had just had dinner with Vic and his current woman. He wasn’t in a relationship, but was super interested in this girl Violet. She wasn’t exactly the prettiest girl out there, but I could totally see her and Vic together. They were like the same person, and currently I could hear her shouting Vic’s name from the room next door. The guys’ parents were in Mexico at a wedding for a friend, so the guys had the house to themselves.

I sighed as I heard a knock on the door and knew Mike was done drumming. He probably wanted a shower, so I needed to drain the water. I stood up and pulled the plug on the tub, letting the water slowly go down.

“Door is open,” I shouted while stepping out and grabbing my towel, wrapping it around myself as the cold air hit me.

Mike appeared in the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Beads of sweat were dripping from every inch of him. I crinkled up my nose as he tore his shirt off and walked towards me.

My eyes got wide as I stepped back, “Don’t you dare touch me, sweaty boy.”

My back hit the wall next to the toilet, Mike smirked and reached out, grabbing me and pulling me into him. He leaned down and pressed his lips to mine, “How was your bath?”

“Ruined thanks to you,” I rolled my eyes and rubbed my nose against his. “You are smelly and slimy.”

“Does it turn you on?” He wiggled his eye brows and laughed as I shook my head. “I was hoping you’d shower with me. I know I won’t be able to stand it in here for five minutes hearing my brother banging Violet,” Mike cringed.

I laughed, “Your brother hears you banging me almost every day, Michael. You can’t get mad about him and Violet.”

“But I’ve been banging you for the past three years, Cass. It’s so different, he’s used to what you sound like,” Mike whined. “She sounds like a dying cat! She sounds worse than she looks!”

I smacked his shoulder, “She’s a nice girl, shit head. Your brother needs a nice girl after the last one. Now take your damn shower and I’ll see you in your room.” He stuck his bottom lip out in a pout and I grabbed it with my forefinger and thumb, “Don’t make me rip your lip ring out.”

He tugged away from me and furrowed his brows, “You suck, Cassandra.”

“Maybe after you shower,” I smirked and walked past him, looking over my shoulder before exiting the bathroom. He had a playful look in his eyes and a big grin on his face. I blew him a kiss and closed the door behind me.

I reached down into my overnight bag and pulled out a pair of underwear. I took my long hair out of the messy bun it was in, letting it fall down my shoulders and back. I was so happy to finally be spending the night at Mike’s house. We literally hadn’t spent the night together since our anniversary, which was over a week ago. I had the flu last weekend and was stuck in the house, and I was put on “probation” from weeknights with him until my report card came out showing that I really did improve my grades. I ran my hands through my hair, ridding it of tangles, as Mike walked in with his towel wrapped around his bony hips.

“How’d I know you wouldn’t be dressed yet?” He laughed as he closed and locked his bedroom door.

I smiled and yawned, stretching my arms into the air, “That was the fastest shower in the world.”

“Gotta practice for when we go on tour again,” Mike smiled and bumped my hip with his. He opened up his underwear drawer and pulled a pair of boxers out. He dropped his towel and pulled them on. He then opened up his t-shirt drawer and pulled one out, handing it to me.

I looked at it and frowned, “I want the Iron Maiden one, not Nirvana.”

He groaned, “It’s not in there.”

“Yes it is, Mike. You haven’t worn it since I last washed it,” I held out the Nirvana shirt to him. “Give me the shirt.”

“Cassie, it’s a damn shirt. Just put this one on,” he said slightly irritated.

“But I like the way the Iron Maiden one looks with these underwear,” I pushed him out of the way, opening the drawer for myself.

His hands came beside mine and pushed the drawer closed, “We’re going to bed, you don’t have to look good.”

I rolled my eyes, “Michael.”

“Cassandra,” he kept his hands on the drawer. “It’s not even in there. Just wear this one.”

“Let me look,” I pushed his arms away.

“No,” he grabbed my wrists as I tried to open the drawer.

I looked up at him, pissed off that he was being so weird about me wanting a different shirt to sleep in. “What the fuck are you hiding?”

“I’m not hiding anything. Just put on the damn shirt, Cassie. I’m gonna end up taking it off of you anyway,” he laughed and kissed my forehead, letting go of my wrists.

I huffed and pulled the shirt over my head, letting it cover me. I wasn’t in the mood to fight with him over a shirt. It was stupid for me to get so worked up when he was right - it was just going to end up on the floor.

I smiled and leaned towards him, standing on my tip-toes and pressing my lips to his, “I love you, Mikey. Sorry for arguing.”

“I love you too, baby,” he smiled and grabbed the back of my thighs, hoisting me into the air.



Mike pulled out of me and collapsed beside me, catching his breath. I fell from my hands and knees onto my stomach, letting out a huge shaky exhale as I closed my eyes, the room spinning. The air in the room was thick and hot, which didn’t help with the slick coat of sweat that covered my body. I’m pretty sure my hair was drenched as well. Why was it so god damn hot in here?

I shook my head, trying to make this sense of dizziness go away, but it just wasn’t working. I sat up and looked at Mike, his eyes were closed and his face looked peaceful. I really didn’t want to bother him, but I felt like total shit.

I lightly shoved his shoulder and he groaned, “Mikey, I don’t feel good.”

His eyes opened and he leaned up and grabbed my hands, “What’s wrong? You look like you’re about to cry.”

“I’m dizzy and hot,” I whined and collapsed into his arms. “Make it stop.”

He sighed and ran his right hand through my hair, “Just lay down, Cass. I’ll open the window and go get you some water. Just lay down and breathe.”

He let go of me and I laid down with my head on his pillow, still pouring sweat. He walked over to the window and cracked it, letting fresh air into the room. I closed my eyes for a few minutes until he came in with a cold water bottle for me.

“Drink slow,” he said softly while rubbing my back. I brought the water to my lips and took slow sips, but really I just wanted to chug it. He pulled my hair up into a bun and took the hair tie off of my left wrist, securing the bun, as I finished the water bottle.

I threw the empty bottle down onto the bed and leaned onto his shoulder, “Thank you, Mikey” I sighed.

“Just lay down, baby. I’ve got you,” Mike assured me while now rubbing my side. He lowered his back onto the bed, guiding me with him.

About ten minutes went by and I was finally feeling normal again. I snuggled into Mike’s chest and placed a kiss on his collar bone. He stopped rubbing my hot skin when I kissed him.

“I don’t know why things like that have to happen to me,” I frowned. He didn’t say anything in response, he just shrugged and kept his eyes closed. “Thank you for taking care of me. You’re the best, you know?”

This time he didn’t say anything and he didn’t shrug. His hand fell off of me and onto the sheets. What the fuck was his issue?

I sat up and pulled his shirt back over my head, “What’s up with you?”

“I don’t know, Cass. I haven’t seen you in a week and when I finally see you, you almost pass out,” he replied, flatly.

My lips automatically sank in between my top and bottom teeth, not even knowing how to respond to what he just said. Did he really think that I was relapsing again?

“Mike, I haven’t…” I said softly. “You really think…”

He shrugged and opened his eyes, looking over at me, “When did you start again?”

My jaw dropped, “I didn’t, Mikey. I swear…”

“Cassie, you really don’t have a reason to lie to me,” he sat up, burning holes into me with his eyes.

“I’m not fucking lying!” I shouted, grabbing my underwear and pulling them up my legs. “I can’t believe you think I’d lie to you about this!”

He shook his head while he looked at me, “You know how much I’ve done for you these past months so this wouldn’t happen? You’ve been so good, Cass. Then you are away from me for a week and it starts again. This is why I told you to go back…”

“Are you fucking kidding me? Do you hear yourself!” I got off the bed and yanked on the ends of my hair. “I just fucking said I didn’t relapse!”

“If you didn’t relapse then give me one good fucking reason why you would nearly pass out after sex, Cassandra!” Mike spat, hastily. “Like you didn’t fucking pass out last time you did.”

“You know what, Michael? Fuck you,” I snapped. “You don’t want to believe me when I’m telling the truth, go fuck yourself.”

“I would believe you if you were telling the truth, but you’re not,” he said matter-of-factly.

I rolled my eyes and walked over to my overnight bag, grabbing my car keys out of it and pulling on a pair of sweatpants.

“Where the fuck are you going?” He said while grabbing onto my arm as I went to grab my bag.

I pulled my arm from his grip and looked him in the eye, “I’m going home. To my house. Where I’m not going to be harassed by my dumbass of a boyfriend because he doesn’t want to believe anyone but himself.”

“Maybe because your dumbass of a boyfriend is right,” he responded, crossing his arms. “You know, you really shouldn’t be driving when you’re in this state.”

“Like you fucking care,” I rolled my eyes and pulled my bag onto my shoulder. “You won’t even listen to me when I try to tell you the truth. Don’t worry about me fucking driving.”

“Fine. You're right. I don’t care. Wreck your car, Cassandra,” Mike shrugged and turned on his heel, walking away from me.

I slipped my Vans on and walked towards his door, opening it. “Good, I will. Don’t show up to my funeral. Don’t call me, either. I’m done dealing with this. With you. It’s over,” I slammed the door behind me, making everything in the hallway and probably in his room shake.



The car ride to my house was nothing but tears and agony. I barely even made it into my house once I put my car in park. All I wanted to do was sit in there and cry myself to sleep. I didn’t want to move. I didn’t want to do anything. I really broke up with Mike.

I managed to get myself into my house and into my bed by midnight. My mom didn’t even realize that I had come home, but I didn’t care. I didn’t want to see her right now. I just wanted to sleep and forget about what had just happened. Things would be fine tomorrow, right

Wrong.

Notes