Where Do We Go From Here?

After a weeks worth of thinking, I was ready to do what I've wanted to do for over a year now. It was time to be upfront and blunt and if it didn't work out then I would just have to deal with it. I'm a big girl and need to just stop being a little bitch. It just need it to be over with now and get a straight answer.

I stood in the catering line humming a song to myself, got my food and sat down in the grass to eat and check up on social media things. As I was scrolling through Twitter, I was noticing a lot of people talking about Ben and some tweet from last night. I did a little digging since some people said it was deleted and I knew them sneaky fans had screenshots somewhere.
After about five minutes, I found it. It read I JUST WANT TO SAY I'M SORRY AND I CAN'T. I'M SUCH A CUNT.

I finished my meal and walked back to my bus and like everyone else who saw the tweet, wondered what it was about. I pushed it away from my mind as I went about my day.

I had finally finished all that I had to do today and I waited for AA to come back from their set so I wouldn't just chicken out of what I was gonna do.

I sat outside the buses, having a smoke to calm the little butterfly nerves I was feeling. It wasn't exactly working so I went for some liquid courage, the good old buddy helping me make decisions for years now.

I came back out after making a fairly strong drink to see the boys walking past.

"Hey Becca!" Denis said and I did the 'sup' nod as I took a sip from my drink.

"How was your day today?" Ben asked.

"Oh, it was good. Same shit. How was your guys' day?" I asked and they chuckled.

"Had a girl grope all of us at the meet and greet but other than that it was good." James laughed and I shook my head.

"Wanna come have a drink with us? We're thinking of setting up the pong table tonight." Sam wiggled his eyebrows. The last time I went with this, I ended up running around, completely obliterated, naked around some buses.

"Sure! I'll be over in a little bit." I smiled. The words left my mouth before really thinking. I had to do this tonight and if playing some beer pong was what we would be doing, then that was how it would go down.

I shoved the chair I was sitting in back into the undercarriage and walked over to the AA bus where they were putting the table out. People were already gathering around to watch the events. Beer pong seemed to be the sport of Warped Tour; there was always someone playing it each night.

"Alright boys, what are the teams tonight?" I asked and they looked around each other.

"It's gonna be the same as last time." James smirked and I nodded, giving Denis a high five.

We all poured the beers into our cups and began making the losing team's bet.
"Okay, do we do the naked run again or just something else?" Sam asked, assuming the position of the ref once again.

"Losers give piggyback rides around the lot to the winners?" I suggested trying to get away from the naked things being spouted from the crowd around us.

"No, that's too boring." Cam said rolling his eyes.

"If we're still playing the strip pong, losers give us the piggy back rides in their underwear around the lot." James said and it seemed like that's what we were going with.

The game went pretty quick and once again, the more we drank, the more shots we lost.

It came to an end and Denis and I had lost once again.

"Alright, who is taking who?" Sam asked and I walked over to Ben figuring he was the lighter one and keeping the fact that I could finally talk to him in the back of my head.

"Okay, Becca, can you even pick him up?" James chuckled.

"Hop on." I told Ben and I struggled to keep my balance but finally got my footing and ran in a bit of a circle.

"She's gonna kill us both!" Ben yelled out and everyone laughed.

We got ourselves ready and then Sam told us to go.

"Why are you so damn heavy?!" Denis yelled as we ran and I laughed but was struggling myself keeping Ben on my back. Being only 5'4 and carrying a dude who was 6'1 was definitely difficult.

The lap was over and I could feel my whole body burning from holding him up but it was fun.

We were all laughing and having a good time.

The next game was set up for the next round of people who had the same fate as us. I got dressed and grabbed a bottle of water before sitting down to enjoy the spectacle.

"That was fun." Ben said as he sat down next to me.

"It was." I smiled. We sat, cheering on the teams and laughing at the shit talking and I decided that now was better than ever to talk to him.

"Hey, do you wanna go for a walk?" I asked and he looked over a bit puzzled.

"Yeah, sure." He shrugged. We got up and walked away fom the massive group of people.

Once we were far enough away, I took a deep breath and went to speak.

"Ben." I said and he looked over at me as we kept walking.

"I've been wanting to say something for the past week but had to get myself in a place where
I could actually say it." I paused.

"What is it?" He sounded a bit nervous but I continued.

"Last year was so nice. I feel like after that something just clicked with us, at least I thought we did but last week when you said that I was really nothing special... It kind of broke my heart even though I know we weren't really much of anything besides friends. I mean, I like you a lot and I just don't know if you feel the same but I thought you felt the same but I don't know. I just thought I should bring it up just so I can get things clear." I said, now out of breath from my ramble. I looked at him and he was just staring at the ground.

"Oh" He said with a cough.


At the sound of one simple word followed by silence, I could feel the tightness in my chest grip me even tighter and the tears well in my eyes

Notes

Oh boy do I love some good cliffhangers and oh boy have I missed writing them.


Hope you all are well and having a good day/night!
Love you all<3

~Becca xx