What Hurts The Most

Another exciting day in the life of Skye... by exciting I mean homework up the yin yang and being home alone jamming out to very loud music. Hey, It's exciting in my book.

My parents were gone for the week.. SHOCKER... and It was a Friday afternoon. I was planning on just hanging around by myself as I usually do. There were a few parties going on this weekend that I was debating on going to but for tonight, I was resting. A week of school is draining so I liked my alone time. My parents left me two hundred for anything I needed, I'm not sure why they left that much each time they left but I didn't argue, half went to new electronics and upgrading my camera and the other half went to moving out after high school.

I didn't realize someone was at the door until the song started to switch. I could hear loud banging on the door and it startled me. I turned down my music figuring it was a neighbor coming to yell at me about how 'kids these days have no consideration for other people'

Who I saw took me by surprise; TONY PERRY. Tony Perry was standing at my front door.

"Hey Skye." He said. I eyed him up and down, drinking him in like the thirsty girl I was. He was dressed very casual; sweat pants and a t-shirt.

"Hey Tony." I said coughing to hide the excitement in my voice. "What's up?" We were neighbors and grew up together and even though we stood on opposite sides of the popularity spectrum, we still talked an hung out on occasion.

"Nothin, I was just bored and started walking, heard you having a little rock fest by yourself again figured I'd stop by." I chuckled and rubbed my neck. He did this almost every other Friday and after all the months of this happening, you would think I would be used to it by now but nope, still gets me all flustered.

"Uh, ok yeah, wanna come in? Want something to drink?" I said as I led him in.

"Skye, we've been around each other enough for you to know that I always ask for a Corona and you never have it so I settle with the beer your dad has in the fridge." He said with his beautiful smile. I could feel the slight embarrasment fly to my cheeks turning them red. I turned quickly to grab him a beer from the fridge and cooled myself down.

I handed him his beer and we sat in my kitchen, me being my awkward self and him sitting there smirking. Part of me knew that he knew I liked him and kept it to himself to torture me.

"So, what were ya doing?" He asked and I snapped out of my 'conspiracy against Skye' cloud and shrugged.

"Homework. Figured I'd get it done so I have the weekend free."

"You going to any parties this weekend?" He said and moved one of his brows.

"I don't know yet. Kat wanted me to go to Jaime's party tomorrow night but I'm not sure yet."

"You should go! Nobody sees you out anymore. It's not like you're one of the outcasts, you get invited to these things, Skye." He said, a little frustrated.

"I know but I'm not one of you guys either. I'm not part of the popular crowd. Plus, I don't think I can take another night of you going around flirting with girls while your girlfriend is off at work." Talk about word vomit.. that second part was not meant to be said. I covered my face in part fear, part shame.

"Why does it matter? I rarely act on anything I do. I like girls, girls like me. I like to have some fun while being tied down. Besides, Dani is just an arm piece. She's a kid, she doesn't know half the shit I do. All she cares about is her appearance and whats trendy." I watched him roll his eyes almost bitterly. Everyone close to Tony knew Dani was a dipshit and we all found it entertaining that she still stayed with his player ass.

"It doesn't matter, I shouldn't have even said it. Sorry." I said timidly.

"Listen, Skye, you could say anything to me. You're probably the only person who I can take shit from. You're too sweet to mean harm to anyone." I felt the butterflies errupts in my stomach. I wasn't sure if he was being serious or just toying with me.

"Well, I guess I'll let you get back to the homework. I'll see you at Hime's party tomorrow, right?" He said and got up to toss the bottle in the recycling bin.

"Maybe, like I said, I'm not sure. Talk me into it tomorrow like you usually do, I'm sure Kat will too." I chuckled.

I walked him to the door, a blush oh so present on my face as we stood there awkwardly.

"I'll see you later, Skye." He said and flashed me his wonderful smile once again causing my face to get even more red. I smiled and slowly closed the door.

'What I wouldn't do to be with him.' I said to myself with a sigh. I turned my music back up and went back to my homework. I ordered out and ended up falling asleep while I watched some docu-series on MSNBC.

**

"Come on, Skye! You need some socialization. I don't care if I have to drag you out of this boring house myself." Kat said sternly. I had known her since middle school. She was a nice girl, a cheerleader who, for some reason, enjoyed my company.

I was always the person to be 'friends' with people from different cliques. I had Tony who was pretty popular, Kat who was a cheerleader, my cousin Josh who was on the Lacrosse team and a few more people who were on the not so popular side of the high school spectrum. I was a friendly girl and no one had a real reason to dislike me so I was just a neutral person.

"Kat, you know I don't like going to massive house parties." I said with a sigh knowing I was losing this battle with her as I watched her pick and choose what I should wear. My closet didn't give her much wiggle room since all I liked to wear was sweaters, hoodies, t-shirts, jeans, sweats and yoga pants.

"Well, sucks to be you, doesn't it? You're going with me and you're gonna have fun." She said and laid out a black and tan sweater with black yoga pants and paired it with my black boots and a tan beanie. I rolled my eyes at how coordinated she is and put the clothes on.

"If I have a bad time, it's gonna be your fault." I said as I started my makeup.

"Yeah yeah, when have I ever taken you out and not shown you a good time? Never." She said and I just rolled my eyes. "That's what I thought. Now finish up, I'll meet you outside."

She left the room and I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled. It was a good hair and makeup day for a Saturday. I slipped my boots on, grabbed everything I needed and locked everything up before hoping in Kat's car.

I had been sitting outside drinking essentially by myself most of the night. I was boring myself by watching Tony flirt with every girl in this place, it made me sick and sad. I, just once, wanted him to flirt with me rather than those bimbos. At the same time, I'm glad he doesn't. Once a player always a player.... is what I keep telling myself in hopes to crush my strong liking towards him.

"Enjoying yourself?" Someone said beside me. Our lovely host, Jaime Preciado. He was a goofy guy, everyone loved him not only for his badass party throwing skills but his personality.

"I was dragged along, Observing all of the stupid things people are doing and I'm drinking by myself so yeah, I'm having a great time." I said sarcastically with a smile and took another sip of my drink.

"Ahh, classic Skye." He said with a chuckle.

"I'm just not feeling it tonight." I said, never looking at Jaime, just staring off at the girls who fawned over Tony. I watched him glance over at Jaime and I and leave the horde of girls and start walking towards us.

"Hey, you made it!" He said with a grin.

"Not by choice." I sighed. I was bringing myself down. For a few hours I just sat at this table watching Tony give all of these girls attention and it made me jealous.

"Well, at least you're here." He smiled and then walked back to the girls. I sighed once again and got up to refill my drink. Jaime had wondered off to mingle with people and I was glad because he could be a pain when he drinks.

I wandered around, looking for a more comfortable place to be rather than sit outside and be bitter about Tony.

Even though I had gotten him out of my sights, he still stuck in my mind. I hated it. I hated knowing that there's no chance in hell of ever being with him and that I had to watch all these girls just drool over him and watch him as he lapped it up.

I sighed angrily and decided to go. I searched for Kat but couldn't find her so I walked up to Jaime to tell him that if Kat went looking for me, I went home. He was ad to see me leaving so early but I couldn't standing sitting here by myself and see Tony being fawned over.

I left, no one here cared that I was gone. I was just a sitting rock.

I walked to Taco Bell down the street and scoop up my usual drunk food and went home.

I hated that I was so easily persuaded to go out to places I knew I didn't want to be. Very rarely do I actually enjoy myself at the parties Kat drags me to and this time was no different.
I kicked my boots off, got another drink and curled up on the couch solemnly watching Cops and eating my Taco Bell.

I felt the tears start to prick at my eyes for no reason other than I had been drinking and overthinking. It happened all too often. The feeling of being kicked to the side and that no one could love me. I had deliberately put myself in a bad mood for no reason other than to feel sorry for myself.

I wiped the tears as the streamed down my face. I hated that one person could cause all this pain. It was a never ending cycle of loving someone you cant have, drinking, crying and trying to forget.

I waited until I was all through crying and felt numb to finally go upstairs to bed to sleep off my drunkenly broken heart.


Tomorrow would be a new day.

Notes

I'm getting so excited while writing for this story! It's such an emotional rollercoaster for me and I'm not sure if that's gonna be good or bad haha

Well, I'll see you guys sometime in the next few days, have a great Thanksgiving! :D


Love you<3
~Becca