What Hurts The Most

Kindergarten was a fun time for most people. We remember the friends we had made, what the days were like and how much fun it was. I remember it as the scariest day of my life. A day where I had to branch out on my own for the first time. I had no problem making friends, it was kindergarten after all; every child is friendly and most don't know each other anyways.

As kids we were so forgiving and carefree. We didn't judge each other for what we looked like or how much we did or didn't have. We simply didn't care about anything besides coloring, story time, recess and naps. I miss those days.

Elementary school was a time where I made friends and, somehow, enemies.
First grade was where everything started. I had my first kiss there. Even though it was innocent, it made me feel happy. My first kiss was given away to Tony Perry. We grew up only a block away from each other. You see, I was the shy girl in school. While I loved being around people and interacting, I hated being in the spotlight. I kept to myself mostly.

After that kiss, I had kept him in my mind. At the ripe age of seven, I was smitten over this kid. I still am to this day. We were good friends until Middle School hit, then everybody changed. My small group of friends stuck with each other while I drifted off. I was friendly to everyone even though some people were very mean to mean for being 'too quiet and weird' I still talked to anyone who talked to me. I was the type to work by myself rather than in a group, draw rather than talk with friends, sit quietly rather than cause a commotion.

That changed towards the end of Middle School though. Through bad influence 'friends' I came into my own. I became sarcastic and more outspoken. I still had my quiet, shy side but I enjoyed messing with teachers and occasionally getting in trouble.

Once I hit High School.. well... I stopped with the getting in trouble and causing a commotion. I became friendly again but still had my sarcasm.

Now here I am, A sophmore in highschool, still drooling over the same kid that kissed me so many years ago and doing nothing about it.

Tony Perry and I were friends but I wouldn't exactly say that we were good friends. We were the type to hang out if we really had nothing to do and by we I mean him. I became more of an introvert through high school. I wasn't like the other kids, I didn't fully enjoy going to parties on the weekends or really going out even. It was very rare to see me out at someone's house for anything other than hanging out. I did however enjoy a good drink.

Once I became old enough to be left home alone for a long period of time, my parents dipped out. They went back to their busy adult life while they left their fifteen year old daughter home by herself. I didn't mind though. They raised me to be responsible and know what to do in sticky situations. I of course took advantage of the beautiful liquor cabinet while they were gone though. I became a totally different person when no one was around. I liked that I could do whatever I wanted to without any repercussions. Don't get me wrong, my parents loved me but they weren't the affectionate type once I got older.

I have since become what people call an 'Extroverted Introvert' which means that I can be outspoken and bubbly but still want my time alone and not want to talk to anyone. I had a good balance in my life, I had plenty of things going for me yet I always felt like I was missing one thing... Tony Perry. He had a girlfriend now and I was out of his league. His girlfriend is everything that compliments him; Cute, loved by most, and popular like him. She was a bit of an air head though, she never noticed how her boyfriend flirts with almost every girl he sees or how he is cheating on her on the weekends when shes off working and hes at parties. I don't understand how Danielle never notices. Shes a pretty smart chick but damn, when it came to Tony, she was so damn oblivious. I envied her either way. She had the boy I have wanted for the longest time.


So here I am, chasing hopelessly after the guy I think I love while staying away at the same time. If there ever were a time that I got the chance to tell him how much I liked him, I doubt I would do it. He was popular and I wasn't. He was gorgeous and I was just average. He's Tony Perry and I'm good ol' Skye. Nothing special, just shy Skye.

Notes

Hello people! How are you all today? Hope you're all doing well!

This is a new story I've decided to start to get my flow back. It's something different but something I think will be similar to my Mike Story and I'm just excited about it. I hope you all will be too. I hope you'll subscribe and comment to tell me what you think!

Love you all!
~Becca xx