Noortje’s POV

We had finally arrived in San Diego. I had no idea what time it was, all I knew was that the sun was setting. Tony and I had already collected our luggage and were now making our way to the parking where Jaime and Vic had parked the car for us yesterday. As we were about to cross the road I saw somebody next to us talking on the phone. They hung up and sighed before muttering a loud ‘fuck’. I walked up to them and was about to ask something when I realised who it was.

“Hey, Luke, is everything alright?” I questioned, placing a hand on his shoulder, while my other hand was occupied with Tony’s.
“Yeah, my ride bailed. I guess I’m stuck here till tomorrow morning.” He smiled sadly.
“You know, we could give you a ride if you want.” Tony suggested.
“Umm… are you sure?”
“Yeah, why not. You helped us, now it’s time to reciprocate the favour.”
“Umm, ok then. Just promise you won’t kidnap or murder me?” Luke said with a laugh.
“I can’t promise anything.” I said seriously before laughing, giving myself away. God, was that a cheesy joke. What the fuck is wrong with my sense of humour?

Luke followed us to the parking lot, and luckily we were able to find the car in under 10 minutes. It’s always difficult to find something you haven’t hidden yourself… Kind of like emotions and secrets. It’s hard to read emotions people hide, but then again, what if you, yourself, don’t even know how you feel? I’ve been so confused about everything lately. There have been too many memories brought back to life, and I’ve had more breakdowns the last 2 months than I have the last 6 years. The only thing I was sure about was Tony.

I sat in the backseat, after convincing Luke to sit in the front, because I was probably going to fall asleep anyway. I giggled slightly and Tony raised his eyebrows at me.
“What’s so funny?” He urged.
“Nothing. I was just thinking about how we’re lucky to have found the car so easily, and then I somehow trailed off and ended up thinking about how much I love you.” I explained.
Tony got in the car and looked at me in the rearview mirror. He chuckled while shaking his head, but soon also gave me a look which I couldn’t figure out. It was like he was trying to read me, but at the same time being afraid of finding out about something.

We were about to get on the highway when Tony realized something.
“Hey,” He directed at Luke, “You never said where you have to go to.”
“Umm…” Luke got out a small piece of paper and read out the address.
“No fucking way!” I exclaimed.
“What?”
“Neighbour!”
“Wait, what?”
Tony laughed, “It’s the house across from us, and I think there’s somebody that’s really happy about that.” He pointed at me.
“Oh damn, I thought I would have finally gotten rid of you.” Luke joked.
I pouted and looked at Tony, who pouted as well.
“You don’t like us?” I said in a baby voice before grinning.

We continued talking for a bit and I rested my head on the cool window, watching the sky turning darker and darker. The streetlights were carefully illuminating the road and cars in a yellow glow and the stars up overhead were burning brightly. I slowly closed my eyes, listening to the silent music playing along to the humming of the car.

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Tony’s POV

I pulled into the driveway and looked in the rearview mirror, smiling at the sight of Noortje sleeping innocently. The car stopped making sounds as soon as I turned the engine off.
“I hope you don’t mind walking the long journey to your house across the street.” I opened the car door and got out.
“No, I think I can manage that,” Luke smiled, “Thanks again for letting me come with you.”
“It’s no problem, seriously. Your house is literally there.”
“Hahaha. At least I already know some of my neighbours.”
“I’ll let you in on a secret,” I whispered, “We are the coolests neighbours out of everyone in this street.”
“We’ll see about that.”

We said our goodbyes and Luke walked into his new house. I left Noortje in the car while I got the suitcases out of the car boot and placed them at the front door. Fortunately we didn’t have that many suitcases as some were already brought back when the others came back home, but carrying suitcases is quite tiring. I opened the door to the back seat and slowly took Noortje out, carrying her bridal style. She stirred slightly and grabbed onto my shirt before falling back asleep. I kissed her forehead and rang the doorbell, knowing their either Vic, Mike, Jaime, or all of them were here.

Vic opened the front door and smiled at us.
“We moved all of Noortje’s stuff into your room, I hope you don’t mind.” He grinned, pretty proud of himself.
“No, that’s fine.” I thanked him.
He helped me bring the suitcases inside since I couldn’t do that with Noortje in my arms. I walked into the house and said hi to Mike and Jaime who were sitting in the livingroom.
“I’m just going to bring her to bed and I’ll be down afterwards.” I whispered.
They nodded and let me walk up the stairs.

I carefully placed Noortje on my side of the bed. Knowing she had to wake up, I kissed her lightly. Her eyes fluttered open and she looked at me sleepily.
“Hey baby,” I murmured, “Sorry to wake you, but you might want to go to the bathroom and also put on some pajamas, so you can go to sleep without having to wake up super early tomorrow to change out the pad.”
She nodded and grabbed her pajamas that were conveniently placed on the bed by one of the guys. She walked into the bathroom and froze.
“The pads are in my bag.” She whined in a sleepy voice.
“I’ll go get them, you go get changed.” I kissed her and left to go downstairs.

I felt 3 pairs of eyes following me as I trudged over to the suitcases. Wanting to spare the embarrassment for Noortje, I decided to take the entire bag with me. The eyes followed my again as I went back upstairs. Was me getting a bag really that interesting?

I knocked on the en-suite bathroom door, not wanting to intrude on Noortje.
“I made a mistake.” She groaned.
“What did you do?” I said trying to stay calm, but panic slightly raising.
“Ugh. I forgot about, you know, and decided to go to the toilet, and now I’m stuck here.”
I chuckled.
“Hey, don’t laugh. I’m just so tired!” She whined.
“Don’t worry. I’ll hand them to you… and close my eyes of course.”
I opened the door and blindly handed the pads to Noortje.
“Thank you!” She grinned, the goofy face she was making evident in her voice.
“I wish I could just see they faces you’re making at me right now.” I tried looking through my eyelashes.
“No! Don’t. There’s too much blood here.”
“Fine,” I pouted.
I closed the door and sat on the bed, waiting on her to come out. After about 10 minutes she finally came out and snuggled under the covers of the bed. I ran my fingers through her hair and kissed her nose.
“I’ll be back in a little bit. I promised Jaime, Vic, and Mike that I was going to talk to them for a while.” I mumbled.
“Hmm… okay.” She snuggled further into the pillow and her breathing slowed down.

As I walked into living room I felt all eyes on me again. I tried ignoring it, but it was starting to bug me. Did I look weird? Did I do something wrong? Had I changed into a strange creature?
“Oh guys, seriously, why are you staring at me?” I laughed nervously.
“Nothing.” Mike said, dragging out the word.
I eyed him suspiciously and then looked at the other two guys sitting next to him.
“You guys should get married.” Jaime blurted out.
“What the fuck!” I squealed, “I’m sorry-- Just-- What the fuck?”
“Did I say something wrong?” Jaime frowned.
“No, sorry, you just really surprised me by saying that.”
“You do see yourself being with her for the rest of your life, right?”
“Yeah… I actually had an idea…”
“Go on,” Vic urged.

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Noortje’s POV

I stretched out and let my eyes creek open. Tony was lying next to me with one arm draped sloppily around my waist, meaning he probably eventually joined me, but didn’t want to wake me up by cuddling. Luckily he wasn’t holding on tightly, I was able to get out of bed without having to carefully untangle myself from him. There was something I wanted to do for Jaime, Vic, Mike, and Tony. It wasn’t much, but I wanted to apologize for all the drama I had been causing lately. My intentions weren’t to be annoying, but so many shit had happened. All I wanted was to join my best friends on tour and play music with them, but in the process I fucked up way too many times.

I entered the kitchen and found the ingredients for the breakfast I was going to make. They always loved it when I made pancakes, so what better way to apologize than to feed them with pancakes? I poured the milk, flour, and vanilla sugar in the bowl before cracking the eggs. Knowing the mixtures wouldn’t take long, I decided to heat up the pan, adding some butter to it. Just as I was about to take a scoop of the gooey mix, I felt hands snake around my waist.

“What are you doing?” Tony whispered in my ear and kissed my neck.
I allowed him more access, enjoying the feeling of his lips on my skin, and grinned.
“Making pancakes.” I chirped.
“I love it when you make pancakes.”
His kisses trailed up to my jawline and he span me around. He placed his hands on the small of my back and crashed his lips against mine. I immediately kissed him back and wrapped my arms around his neck. Tony pushed me closer to him and moved his hands to my butt, slightly grabbing it
“Jump,” He muttered into the kiss.
I did as he said and he held me firmly by the thighs before placing me on the counter, making sure not to hit any of the baking supplied. I was craving him and wanted him closer--never have his lips leave mine and never let him go. Tony stood in between my legs and grabbed them, wrapping them around his waist. I let out an involuntary moan and ran my fingers wildly through his hair. My tank top rode up my body as Tony was moving his hands up and down my sides. He was about to lean me backwards--
“Ok guys! Break it up!” Vic commanded and clapped his hands, trying to scare us, as he walked into the kitchen.
Tony and I pulled apart, but still held onto each other. I looked into his eyes and pouted. He pouted back and quickly gave me a few pecks, each one taking a bit longer that the previous one.
“Please don’t start again. My eyes have seen enough.” Vic whined.
I gave him the middle finger and jumped off the counter, standing against Tony.
“I’ll just get back to my pancakes then.” I sighed.
“Ooh! Pancakes!” Jaime said joyfully and jumped into the kitchen.
“I heard pancakes!” Mike chuckled and joined us in the kitchen as well.
I turned around and let some of the batter drip into the pan, sizzling as it touched the hot surface. As much as I wanted to make my pancakes in peace, I just couldn’t ignore the presence of the four guys behind me.
“Can you set up the table while I cook these?” I said, hoping they would get the message and leave the kitchen.
“Sure,” Tony kissed my cheek and went to get started.
Vic groaned and muttered something along the lines of ‘PDA’, but went to help Tony along with Mike and Jaime anyway.

In no time I had finished making a pile of pancakes, placing them on a plate, ready to be served. I walked to the table with the plate and saw 8 hungry eyes staring at the food. I giggled and placed it down, the four guys ravenously digging in. Silence consumed the air, everybody enjoy the delicious goodness, not up for talking. I, myself, only had one pancake, not really feeling like eating more because of the mild cramps that had started.

“So, how are you feeling?” Vic asked.
I sighed and rested my forehead in my hand, getting annoyed by the question that I was constantly being asked.
“I’m ok, stuff like this just happens.” I said referencing to the miscarriage.
“Are you sure?”
I had lost my temper, “You want to fucking know how I feel? I’ll fucking tell you how I feel! I am fucking bleeding ten times worse than a normal period, I get fucking cramps, and feel sick for most of the fucking time I’m awake. Why don’t you tell me how I fucking feel, Vic!”
Everybody looked at me with wide eyes, probably more surprised by the amount of times I had used the word ‘fuck’ than my sudden outburst.
I pushed my chair backwards and stood up, “I’m going to take a shower.”
With that I stormed off, embarrassed by what I had just done.

----
Tony’s POV

Noortje stormed off, leaving us all in an awkward silence.
“I’m sorry,” Vic mumbled.
“It’s ok,” I reasoned, “I guess it’s just getting a bit too much for her. I’ll just go check up on her, don’t expect me to be back any time soon.”
Vic nodded his head and I went to follow Noortje.

I heard the shower run, but there was no subconscious humming, meaning that either Noortje wasn’t in the shower or she was just being really quiet. The door to the bathroom was unlocked, and took this as a sign for me to be allowed to come in. I opened the door carefully and saw Noortje, naked underneath the streaming water, with her back to me, hugging herself. I sighed and slowly stripped out of my clothes so I was also completely naked. Noortje sniffled and moved her head as if she was trying to crack her neck. I walked up behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist. She stiffened up but relaxed as soon as she saw the tattoos on my hands and arms.

“Tony?”
“Hmm?”
“What are you doing here? I’m going to get blood all over you.”
“You left the door unlocked.”
“Oh.”

The only sound in the room was created by the splashing of water of the wall and floor. Noortje’s breathing was slow but also ragged, speeding up sometimes. I wrapped my arms tighter around her, hoping to let her know she wasn’t alone.

“It’s ok to cry.” I whispered.
Immediately Noortje let out a few sobs that still sounded very held back. She raised her hand so it was covering her mouth and her knees gave out a bit. I turned her around and hugged her tightly, my own eyes tearing up; I couldn’t stand seeing her so upset. It breaks your heart to see the one you love crying. Noortje hid her face in my chest and hooked her arms underneath mine, so her hands were resting on my shoulder blades. I took one of my hands and placed it on her head, slowly stroking her soaking hair. Her sobs were now louder and I could feel the salt water and shower water mixing on my skin.

“I don’t deserve to cry,” Noortje cried in between breaths.
“Why not?” I asked instead of immediately denying her.
“I didn’t even know I was carrying a living thing, and yet I still manage to kill it. I’m just selfish.”
“Shhh… no. It wasn’t your fault. Remember, you said we weren’t ready. When we are we will try again and this time we will know about it and love it.”
Noortje nodded, but still continued crying. All I could do was stay strong for her, and hold her till she was ok.

----

After a while Noortje had started shivering and had stopped crying. I suggested that she should go to bed again and just lay down and sleep if possible. Crying had tired her out, and the over thinking she had been doing probably wasn’t helping either. She climbed into bed naked, except for her underwear, which she needed for her pad. I sat down on the side of the bed next to her and played with her hair, hoping she would feel better soon. She curled up with the blankets, but her face was emotionless as she stared at the doorway. Vic appeared and smiled at us sadly.
“I’m sorry.” He said guiltily.
“I’m sorry too,” Noortje murmured, barely audible.
He smiled at her, accepting her apology, but still very uncertain if she had forgiven him.
“Tony, I was wondering if you could help us with something.” Vic continued.
I nodded, “I’ll been there in a bit.”

Vic left and I stayed seated. I kissed Noortje’s cheek, trying to convey all my emotions in it.
“I love you.” I confessed.

Notes

So, a new character that might come back later. What significance do you think he has?

And poor Noortje, she's actually heartbroken about having had a miscarriage, even though she seemed fine about it.

What do you think will happen?

- DSN