The eerie quietness of the apartment was what proved most difficult for me during the boys' tours. I stared down at the dusty mirror and the rolled five dollar bill in my hand and felt everything else dwindle away. My concerns were gone, and my worries were virtually nothing. The doorbell rang and I made my way over to it, stashing all my equipment underneath the bathroom sink in Mike's bathroom.

I quickly overlooked my face in the hallway mirror and dusted around my nose cleaning off any of the excess blow. I answered the door to a very sad but excited Steph and Cara. I smiled as we engulfed in a group hug. They both smelt amazing, quiet like myself they had dressed up nicely; and brought over some junk food and a stack of DVD's to keep ourselves entertained.

"The place looks spotless," Cara smiled and plopped onto the couch, throwing her feet onto the coffee table.
"I cleaned a little before you got here," I shrugged and got a few paper plates, throwing them next to her feet.
"We brought lots of goodies to keep up preoccupied for the night," Steph looked over at me.

I was so blown. I didn't give a shit about what they were saying, but I tried to maintain some level of attention on the words emitting from their mouths.

"You look good Brooks," Steph smiled genuinely and got up, putting in a DVD.

They ate as I watched, and they didn't question me. Something I loved about the girls, they never had questions for me. Mike, Jaime, Vic, they always had question after question. They never stopped, but the girls, they never pushed any issue or crossed any boundaries.

We were all glued to our phones, both the girls texting their men furiously, the excitement on their faces. Instead, I stared at pictures of Mike. Mike sleeping, Mike peeing, Mike smiling, Mike laughing. It comforted me. They made me sad but yet on the opposite hand, made me smile and giggle like a little girl. Mike was truly everything to me.

He was my provider. My best friend. My soul-mate. He was everything I ever wanted and ever dreamed of. There was never a point in time where I wasn't happy with him, where he wasn't what I truly craved. I loved going to bed with him at night, and waking up with him every morning. Even at the stupid age of sixteen he had quickly taken over my world. It was always about him, making him happy, making him laugh, making him love me.

I missed him when he wasn't around, and missed him when he simply went to the grocery store. People always bitched about soul-mates, but Michael Christopher Fuentes, was truly, in every aspect, the one I wantedforever. I half-smiled and tucked my phone into my pocket, feeling my high wearing off.

I felt ashamed that my life couldn't function normally without doing some kind of substance. Whether it'd be massive amounts of weed or a ridiculous amount of Coke. I needed it. I more so fiend for Cocaine than I did anything else. It had become my crutch. It had helped me forget about my family, my friends, my many addictions. It had helped me become absorbed into my boyfriend, feeling such intense and devoting feeling towards Mike.

I felt like there were no negatives when it came to Coke. Aside from the fact that I had overdosed one too many times, and it was getting more and more expensive.

"Mike isn't texting you?" Steph asked sadly.
"Nuh uh, he's probably sleeping," I shrugged, feeling sort of sad myself.
"They're going to be so busy these next couple months, they're probably trying to get all the sleep they can," Cara snickered quietly.

If there was one thing I knew for absolute sure Mike loved more than me it was music and his fans. Those things were his number one. They made him who he was, allowed him to do what he loved for a living.

"You're phone's ringing," Stephanie slapped my arm gently.

I was so zoned, I slid my finger across the screen and walked into Mike's room.

"Hello?" I said happily.
"Hi," I could hear Mike's tired voice.
"I miss you," I said honestly, laying on his side of the bed.
"I bet you do," He chuckled and I could hear the rustling of him moving around.
"Were you sleeping?"
"Yeah, I'm exhausted. It's been a long couple of months, I got some much needed z's," He said coolly.
"Oh God," I laughed and heard his laugh as well.
"I hate being away from you," I said quietly.
"I know, but I'm going to make decent money, and the fans have waited so long for this tour, they deserve it," He tried to rationalize.
"I know, I know," I sighed.
"Plus I'll see you in three weeks," He sounded thoroughly excited.
"I look forward to it."
"I want to be serious for a second Brook," he began, "I want us to get help soon."
"Mike I told you I didn't want help, I'm fine," I began the argument I wouldn't win.
"It's not about wanting, it's about needing," He said firmly.

I said nothing, and it was apparent Mike wasn't ready for a full fledged argument already because the line died right away. I was trying to mentally prepare myself for an incredibly long and challenging two months.