”I had sex with Kelsey... I had sex with Kelsey... I had sex with Kelsey...”

Tony's voice kept ringing in my ears. And for a moment there, the whole world stopped and time stood still. But only for a moment. When everything turned back to normal again, blood was rushing to my head and all I could hear was the pounding in my ears. I felt hot, suddenly, and I felt the need of fresh air. I had to get out. I had to get away from him.

But I couldn't move. My whole body felt weak, my heart had just been broken into millions of little pieces and my brain wasn't working properly.

”Is everything okay here, guys?” The sound of Vic's voice came from the doorway. I turned my head to look at him but couldn't do anything.

”Could you leave us alone for a moment, Vic?” Tony asked.

”Please don't leave,” I whispered with panic and fear in my eyes.

I was terrified of being left alone with Tony. I wasn't afraid of him or the fact that he had cheated on me. I was terrified of myself and how I would react if I was left alone with him.

Vic looked beyond confused and as he didn't know what to do, he just stood still in his spot next to the door.

”Would you please take your hand off my knee?” I whispered to Tony.

I didn't dare look at him but soon felt him pull his hand away. I sat up straight and took a deep breath in.

”Would somebody mind telling me what the hell is going on?” Vic asked. He was getting frustrated but so was I. My boyfriend cheated on me.

”I'm sure Tony can tell you – his best friend – what's going on,” I said quietly and looked down at the floor.

”I, uh... Abby, can we please talk? Alone?” Tony was practically begging me. His voice was softer than ever but it wasn't fooling me.

”We can talk after you've told Vic what you did,” I told him, ”And I want to know every little filthy detail.”

”Baby...”

”Do not call me baby,” I muttered, ”Talk, now, because I'm about to get really fucking mad.”

”I, uh, I slept with Kelsey,” Tony mumbled quietly. I could only hear Vic taking a deep breath in and then the silence fell.

”Please tell us more,” I muttered and finally looked at Tony. He looked like my words were torturing him but he had no right to be hurt. He had no right to act like a victim.

”What's there more to tell?” he whispered, ”Please, Abby, let me explain.”

”Explain? I'm begging you to explain yourself!” I exclaimed. He flinched and leaned back.

”It happened this morning,” he mumbled and sighed, ”I was on my way to Jaxin's place but then I ran into her and she asked me to help her with her car and I went over to her place and she... She just kissed me, and, you know...”

”And then what? Your clothes suddenly disappeared and your goddamn penis slipped into her?” I exclaimed. Jesus fucking christ.

”Abby, please...”

”Stop saying my name and start telling me the truth! Why did you sleep with her, huh?”

”Because... I don't know. I was stupid and she was there and... I'm sorry.”

”Did you use protection?” I muttered through my teeth. His eyes went slightly wide.

”No...”

”Alright, great!” I exclaimed, ”So now she's probably going to get pregnant and you're stuck with her forever! Congratulations, Tony, you're a real man, aren't you, now, huh!”

”What the hell were you thinking, man?” Vic opened his mouth. Tony turned to look at his friend and seemed really ashamed.

”I wasn't thinking,” he muttered quietly.

”Vic, can you give me a ride home?” I asked and stood up.

”I can give you a ride,” Tony said.

”I don't want a ride from you. I don't want anything from you anymore,” I muttered and glared at him.

”Please, Abby, I don't know what to do,” he whined, ”I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you.”

”You didn't want to hurt me? Did you think of that when you were inside of her? Did you think of me when you fucked her the way you used to fuck me? And what about last night, huh? I thought you said you love me. You sure do change your mind fast.”

”Please don't leave me,” he whispered with eyes full of actual fear. I shook my head and turned around before marching out of the room. Vic followed me out to his car and stopped walking when I sat down on the ground. I took a deep breath in.

”I'm sorry, Abby,” Vic said quietly as he sat down next to me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. He pulled me really close and kissed the top of my head.

”Don't be sorry,” I whispered, ”It's not your fault that your friend's an asshole.”

”Yeah but I feel bad for you. I didn't think he would actually do that, especially to you...”

”Hey, Vic? Can I come over to yours to get really drunk?” I mumbled, ”I promise I won't cry.”

”Don't make a promise like that, Abby,” he said and laughed, ”Of course you'll cry. But that's okay, you can come.”

”Thank you. You're probably the only person I can talk to right now.”

As soon as we had got to Vic's place, he handed me a bottle of vodka. I grimaced before slowly opening it and lifting it up to my lips. I parted my lips and poured the burning liquor down my throat. I coughed and wiped my mouth before putting the bottle away.

”This is awful...” I mumbled, ”But I like it.”

”Oh my god, Abby,” Vic laughed and pulled me into a tight hug, ”You're going to be okay. I'm here for you and I've got alcohol for you.”

”Thanks,” I mumbled against his chest. When he let go of me, I drank some more of the vodka and then sat down on his couch.

”You've got a nice place,” I told him and looked around.

”Thanks. Now, Abby, I'm sure you don't want to talk about my apartment, or Tony, so what do you want to do?” he asked me.

”Uh... Drink,” I admitted, ”And maybe eat some pizza.”

”I'll make it happen,” he told me before disappearing into the kitchen to find his phone.

By the time our pizzas had arrived, I could barely stand anymore. I'd had more than enough to drink and, as much as I wanted to, I just couldn't keep my thoughts off Tony. I had come to realize that night how hard it was to not think about the person you're in love with, especially when they've only hours earlier announced that they've just cheated on you.

”But I don't understand why he says he loves me and then goes to sleep with his ex,” I mumbled with my mouth full of pizza. I swallowed the pizza and drank some beer.

”He knows he fucked up. I'm sure he's out there somewhere doing exactly what you're doing now,” Vic told me, talking about the alcohol and the pizza, ”And I know he's sorry but that doesn't make it okay.”

”You're absolutely right. You know, Vic, you're a really great guy,” I told him, ”I can't believe so many girls have treated you wrong. I would never hurt you if I were your girlfriend.”

”Thanks, Abby,” he said and laughed, ”That almost makes me wish you actually were my girlfriend.”

”I still can't believe Tony did that to me,” I said with a sigh and took another bite of my pizza slice before putting it down. I chewed and swallowed it and then patted my stomach.

”Full,” I mumbled. Vic chuckled.

”You're cute, Abby,” he told me, ”And Tony's an asshole. Best friend or not, he should've known better how to treat a girl like you.”

”The hardest part is that I don't think I can let go,” I said quietly, ”I mean, I love him... He's Tony. My Tony. I don't want it to be over but if he's already cheated on me once, why wouldn't he do it again?”

”I think you should talk with him,” Vic said quietly.

”Now?”

”Now or later,” he shrugged.

”Do you think he'll answer me if I call him?” I asked and grabbed my phone.

”Why wouldn't he? You're not the one who cheated on him, right? I'm sure he would kiss the ground under you feet if that would make you forgive him for what he did to you,” he told me.

Half an hour later two very drunken people were standing in front of each other and just staring at each others faces. Tony and myself hadn't said a word. I didn't know what to say and neither did he. So we just looked at each other. I had no idea what he was thinking but I damn right knew what was going through my mind. As I looked at him and his beautiful face, I could only wonder how he could do what he did to me.

”You're an asshole,” I whispered really quietly. His face softened for a moment and he almost smiled. Almost.

”I know. I'm sorry,” he mumbled quietly, ”Words can't explain how bad I feel right now. I'm the biggest asshole on this fucking planet for doing what I did to you. I know you probably don't believe this anymore but you're the only girl I've ever really, truly loved. You're the most important person in my life, Abby.”

”You sure know how to treat your loved ones...”

”I'm sorry. I don't deserve a girl like you and yet you're here. I don't know if you're going to dump me but, please, don't do it now. Not when you're drunk and especially not when I'm drunk. I can't take it,” he said quietly.

”I wasn't going to leave you tonight,” I mumbled, ”I was going to do it tomorrow.”

”Really?”

”Probably, yeah. I just wanted to talk to you before I do it.”

”So... I'm going to be single tomorrow.”

”Right after I leave you, you can go and sleep with Kelsey to make you feel better. I'm sure that helps,” I said.

”Ha ha, Abby. I would never do that,” he told me, ”I'm not going near that woman ever again. She's trouble.”

”Can I ask you something?”

”Anything.”

”Why did you tell me? That you slept with her? You know I would've never found out,” I said.

”Because I didn't want to lie to you,” he said quietly, ”You deserve to know the truth.”

”Well... Thank you, for that,” I said and nodded, ”I think our conversation is over. I've got my answers and I'm done looking at your face.”

”Ouch.”

”Don't blame anybody but yourself for this, Tony.”

”I won't.”

And then, all of a sudden I felt like throwing up. Was it our conversation or the reality slapping my face or the alcohol or the pizza – either way, the vomit was making its way out, fast. I doubled over and bent down on the ground and let it all come out. Tony, being himself, quickly stepped closer and held my hair up while I emptied my stomach.

”You don't have to do that,” I mumbled, ”I need to learn how to live without you, anyway. Might as well start now.”

”I might be an asshole but I do take care of my girl... While she still is mine,” he told me.

Tony sat down on the ground behind me, never letting go of my hair, and when I was almost sure that I had thrown up everything that had just been inside of me, I let out a deep sigh and rested my back against his chest. He wrapped his arms around me, pulled me really close and I closed my eyes.

”I feel like shit. Physically and mentally,” I mumbled.

”I know. I'm sorry.”

”Stop saying you're sorry. I know you are but that won't change anything,” I muttered.

”Sorry.”

”Tony...”

”Okay. I'll be quiet,” he murmured and kissed the top of my head.

”It feels good to be with you. It feels right. But after all this... I just don't know anymore,” I whispered, ”You've broken my heart. I fell for you and you fucked up.”

”Abby... I'm sor–”

”You're sorry, point taken. Do you think you could help me to the couch? I'm going to pass out there,” I said and tried to get up. Tony helped me up but didn't let go of me.

”You can't sleep on the couch,” he said quietly into my ear, ”It's not comfortable.”

”Well where would you want me to sleep?”

”In our bed with me.”

”That's not going to happen and you know it.”

”Well at least let me take you home and I can find somewhere else to sleep. Please?”

”Fine... I have to thank Vic first,” I said and looked around but didn't see him anywhere.

”He went to sleep already. Thank him in the morning.”

Tony got us a cab and helped me inside. I wasn't feeling too well and could barely walk so he sat me down on the bed and started pulling my clothes off. He got me a glass of water and told me to drink it and I did as told. I pulled on one of his t-shirts and he helped me under the blanket. I rested my cheek against the soft pillow and let out a sigh.

”Goodnight, Abigail. I love you and I'm sorry for being such an asshole,” he whispered before kissing my cheek and turning off the lights.

And then I passed out. Cheated by my asshole boyfriend, mentally abused, tired and feeling like absolute shit.