One Hundred And One Sleepless Nights

I took Alex to see Victor's grave today. She wanted to go and had drawn him a picture and even chose the flowers she wanted to lay down. I didn't want her going to the funeral, but I want her to visit. It's healthy - I think. I could have asked Vic as well, but that's a can of worms I want firmly closed, locked, the key swallowed and then the can thrown in a river.
Afterwards we came home and got ready for Alex's play date. Roy, her boyfriend is coming over. It's the first time he's came over properly so I wanted to appear as normal as possible. To make this easier Jack is somewhere that isn't here. Hopefully not at a bar. He's probably at a bar.
But this plan was blown out of the window and kicked down the street when the girls invited themselves around. It isn't like they called or anything so I could put a pair of ear muffs and a blindfold on Roy. They let themselves in and took over my living room. Jemma, Leah, Kate and Charlie. An awful combo.
"What's the emergency?" I asked casually.
"We need to talk about Vic!" Leah exclaimed.
"What about him?" I frowned.
"Polly's gone! The engagement is off." Charlie said.
"I know. So what?"
"You can have Vic." Jemma smiled. I sighed and shook my head.
"Or he's single." Kate tried gently.
"So what?" I rolled my eyes. "He might be single but I'm not."
"You're not serious about Jack long term. We're talking about Vic." Charlie said.
"I am serious about him," I looked down. Half of the people know, half don't. "We're completely serious."
"How serious?" Kate asked. I chewed my lip nervously. Kate narrowed her eyes at me.
"Jack proposed." I admitted.
"What?!" Kate gasped.
"Serious?" Charlie asked and I nodded.
"Where's the ring?" Kate asked. I took a chain from around my neck and slid my engagement ring from it and onto my finger. Kate took my hand and widened her eyes. "Why didn't you tell me?" she demanded.
"There was never a right time."
"Why are you two shocked?" Charlie asked Leah and Jemma.
"Austin told me." Jemma said guiltily.
"And he told Alan, who told me." Leah admitted.
"You did say yes, right?" Charlie asked.
"I did, but you are not allowed to tell anyone! Not a sole! Only you four, Austin, Alan and Alex know." I rushed.
"What about Jack?" Leah giggled to herself.
"Shit! And Vic!" I suddenly exclaimed.
"Vic knows?" Jemma widened her eyes.
"Uh, yeah. Whoops."
"Whoops is fucking right." Leah said.
"Children!" Kate scolded.
"Fine, whoops is frickin' right. Better?" Leah mocked.
"Much." Kate rolled her eyes.
"Look, Vic is fine. He's cool. Like a cucumber." That's not true, but a little white lie never hurt anyone.
"Was that a sexual reference?" Leah asked making everyone laugh. Everyone but me.
There suddenly was a knock on the door. I got up to answer, expecting to see Roy's mother. But I saw Jack. My eyes went to his face and I gasped. His nose was bloody, the blood all over his face, hands, neck and shirt.
"What the fuck happened to you?" I rushed. Jack shook his head at me angrily and walked in. He saw the girls and went into the kitchen. I hurried to follow him and found him searching for a cloth. I got one and started to clean up his face. "I said what happened." I repeated.
"What happened?" Jack sneered at me. "Vic fucking happened!"
"What?" I frowned. "What did he do?"
"He started arguing with me. He threw a drink over me. And oh yeah, he punched me in the nose!"
"Did you punch back?" I rushed.
"No. I'm not that stupid." Jack glared at the floor.
I heard Kate exclaim "Oh, Alex you want Jemma, Leah, Charlie and I to come and play!" and Alex's bedroom door open and close.
"I'm going to kill Vic. I'll kill him." I fumed. The shock has passed, now I'm turning into a big red ball of anger.
"Please, do." Jack mocked.
I went to the freezer and got out a bag of peas. I wrapped a cloth around it and handed it to Jack. "Put this on your nose." I said as I grabbed my car keys.
"Where are you going?" Jack asked.
"To shout at Vic!"
"Don't do it. Just leave it, babe." he tried.
"No, you... You shut up! You go and get sympathy off everyone while I go and commit a murder." I snapped. Jack went to talk but I held up hand up to silence him. He frowned but knew it was time to shut up.
I walked out of my apartment and headed down to my car. I got inside and started driving over to Vic's. When I arrived I parked up and marched inside. I stormed to his apartment door and banged my fist on the door. I waited a while but eventually Vic answered. He saw me and sighed.
"Before you say anything... I'm sorry!" Vic rushed. He went and sat down and I followed him. He looked up and me and rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm sorry." he told me again.
I didn't listen, I just slapped him hard across the face. I heard the sound echo around his apartment. Vic held his cheek and flexed his jaw. "You unbelievable asshole, Vic!" I growled.
"Okay, you know what?" Vic sighed. "I'm not sorry!"
"Wow, you're such a great human being. Nice to know you feel no emotion after attacking my fiancée!"
"I'm not sorry because I'm going to fight for you this time! I'm not going to give up!" Vic yelled. "I'll never stop loving you." he told me through gritted teeth. Charming, isn't he?
"Stop-" I tried.
"Rushing into an engagement isn't a good idea. You don't know him, or what he's like. You haven't been on vacation together."
"Aren't you being kind of hypocritical?" I folded my arms across my chest and looked down.
"I know I am. Fuck, I know I am. But I'm going to tell you something now, I don't think Jack is right for you. When you realise it I'm going to be here waiting for you. I love you, Zee. All I want is you." Vic said firmly. He was looking at me, searching for eye contact. But I couldn't give it to him. I brought my hands up to cover my face and rubbed my eyes. I felt I was crying and sniffed, trying to stop. But I couldn't. Vic watched me cry, not saying anything. Eventually I just took my hands away and let him see. I didn't care anymore.
"Vic-" I managed to get out.
"Zee, I don't want to hurt you," Vic said gently. I looked at him and slapped him across the face again. Vic stood up and looked at me as he rubbed his cheek. "Think things over. I'll be here and I'll love you. I just... I don't think either of us can be happy unless we're together."
"You're not letting me be happy, Vic." I whispered.
"If you want me to stop, just tell me." he said. But I couldn't reply. So I did what I do best. I shook my head violently, turned and legged it out of Vic's apartment.

Notes

Hey! Wow, late again. Good thing there's only two more left, I'm getting bad at this updating thing! But two BBQ's, playing mother to my kid sister and ASDA not having my tofu. Those are my excuses, don't hate me! Anyway, what did you think? What do you want to see? Who will Zee choose? :)