Believe You Me

I began feeling better soon, but I noticed that Julie was losing the glow in her eyes. She was becoming weak again and I felt bad, maybe I passed the fever to her the day we spent together. I mean, we did sleep together all day… She took a shower and took some medicine, claiming to feel better. I sat on the other couch with Vic and Jaime as Tony and Julie talked. Casey got up to get her some soup when she stood up and walked to my room. I followed behind, closing the door behind me and having her turn her head to me before going to her phone, charging on the bedside table.

“You know, if you have a fever, I don’t mind helping you sweat it out.” I wrapped my arms around her waist and she moved away from me.

“No Mike.” She spoke, opening a message. My eyes glanced at the name and I furrowed my eyebrows.

“Who’s Evans?” I asked, leaning to see the text. Julie shut her phone and glared at me.

“No one, now leave me alone.” She snapped, unplugging her phone. I grabbed her arm and turned her to me.

“I’m your boyfriend, and I will not have you cheating on me. If you want to end it, tell me and we will. But until then, who the fuck is Evans?” Julie stared up at me, shock in her eyes.

“I’m not cheating on you, you bastard!” She yelled, slapping my cheek and leaving from the room. I stood there, rubbing my injured cheek and sighed, walking back to the living room.

“What happened?” Vic asked me.

“I don’t even know anymore.” I noticed Tony look away and begin fidgeting with his shirt. He was nervous. He knew something that I didn’t and I was the boyfriend. I opened my mouth when there was a thud and I snapped my head to the kitchen.

“Call the ambulance! Julie, honey wake up! Come on, we haven’t even said goodbye!” I ran over, the guys following and Casey held Julie tightly as she hung in his arms, limp. Casey was crying his eyes out and Jaime called 911, telling them our address. In no time the ambulance arrived and they took Julie and Casey to the hospital. The rest of us piled in Vic’s car and drove to the hospital.

I sat in a daze. Goodbye? Why would Julie need to say goodbye to Casey? Was she hiding something from me? Tony was nervous earlier too. What did they know that I didn’t? We walked into the hospital and Casey was sitting on a chair, staring at nothing as tears fell from his eyes. Tony sat next to him, rubbing his back and comforting him.

“What do you mean, she didn’t say goodbye, Casey?” I asked. Casey didn’t move but he stiffened.

“Mike, you need to understand something.” He began talking, still staring ahead. “If Julie makes it, she needs to tell you this, but if she doesn’t, I promise to tell you.” I stared at him, wondering what he was talking about.

“Casey, it’s a fever. I probably passed it to her when she slept on my bed. She’ll be fine.” I assured him. Tony was holding his head in his hands and he was shaking a bit. “Tony, come on. Julie’s, a fighter, she’ll be alright.”

“She’s been fighting for 12 years, Mike! Don’t tell me to relax!” Tony snapped at me. I stared at him. 12 years? What was he talking about? Tony apologized, walking out of the lobby and out of the hospital.

“I’ll talk with him.” Jaime spoke, getting up and following Tony out. I sat there, confusing written all over my face and I thought back to many things.

“What the hell is going on?” I asked Vic. He stayed quiet, shrugging and I rested my elbows on my knees, holding my head and sighing heavily. After a few minutes, the doctor walked out at the same time Jaime and Tony walked in and we all stood up.

“How is Julie doctor?” Casey asked.

“She woke up, she’s asking for you Mr. Ervin. Take it easy on her though, you guys can go in.” We nodded, going to the room he told us and we walked in, one by one. Julie sat on the bed, arms hooked up by needles to machines and many cords connected to her chest, under the flimsy hospital robe. She looked over at us and started crying. Casey rushed over and held her tightly.

“Don’t do this to me! You know how scared we were?! I thought we lost you! I can’t bear being without you!” Casey cried. I clenched my hands into fists and walked over. Julie looked up at me and she reached for my hand but I pulled it away. She looked at me with hurtful eyes and Casey let her go.

“Mike?” She whispered to me.

“What is Casey talking about not saying goodbye? Why won’t anyone explain this? Why are you hiding things from me?” I said through gritted teeth. I was beyond pissed, at them. Tony, Casey and Julie were hiding something. Julie looked down at the blanket and closed her eyes.

“I have cancer, Mike. I was diagnosed when I was 9 and when I was 16 I decided to just go on with my life without medication. I got along with Tony more since he and Vic found out when they walked in on me telling my doctor, Evans, about some symptoms. Jaime soon found out when he heard Casey on the phone with me, arguing about surgery plans I didn’t want. I told them to keep it between us until I could find the courage to tell you.” My whole world froze.

The love of my life had cancer and she was going to die. They all knew. Casey since they were small of course, but Tony, Jaime and Vic, my best friends and brother? I shook my head and walked out of the room, ignoring the calls of my name. I walked out of the hospital, going to the house, thinking about everything she just told me. I wasn’t even sure how I got home safely, but I did and I went to my room. I locked the door behind me and leaned my back on the door.

I began feeling light headed and I sunk to my knees, holding my head, letting out a scream. My body shook; I could have lost her today and the last conversation we would have had was me accusing her of cheating when it was her doctor. I held my head, crying my eyes out and laying on the cold floor. I heard banging on my door and ignored my brother’s calls for a while until I couldn’t take them anymore.

“Leave me alone!” I screamed, crying more and hugging myself. I heard the pounding stop and soon the doorknob jiggling. He opened the door, throwing the master keys on the bed and kneeled in front of me.

“Mikey, please listen to me.” He started I shook my head and stood up.

“Don’t call me that! You kept this from me! I deserved to know! I’m her fucking boyfriend! Yet you didn’t even tell me!” I yelled at Vic.

He stood up, glaring at me and shouting, “How was I supposed to tell you!? You two weren’t even dating! It wasn’t even my problem to tell Michael! I had to bite my tongue too many times to keep it from you!” I clenched my hands around his shirt and brought him to me.

“I could have lost her today Victor! I could have lost my girlfriend and I would’ve been the last to know about the cancer!” I yelled at him and he stared at me.

“I know and I’m sorry.” I let his shirt go, falling back to my knees and crying louder. Vic knelt down, hugging me tightly and I held to him like a lifeline. Vic will always be here for me, through tough times and light. I was grateful, no matter how pissed I was at him. He held me tightly, crying with me.

“Come on; let’s get back to the hospital.” He whispered, once I calmed down. I nodded, following him out the door. Just like when we were children on my first day to school, he held my hand, assuring me that everything was going to be alright. We got to the hospital and I couldn’t go in the room. Vic squeezed my hand and smiled at me. “Let’s go Mikey.” I hesitantly followed him and saw Julie sitting on the bed, like before I left. She looked at me and her eyes were puffy from crying. I let go of Vic’s hand and rushed to her, hugged her carefully but tightly.

“Mike, please forgive me for not telling you sooner.” I shushed her, kissing her face and looking at her.

“As long as you’re still with me, I will always forgive you. I love you, baby.” Julie smiled, kissing me and hugging me tightly. Visiting hours were over but I didn’t want to leave. The nurses finally got fed up with me arguing, and they let me stay. Julie laid on one side of the bed and I on the other. She had fallen asleep in my arms and I stroked her soft hair.

I would protect her, no matter what. I would always be there for her until the end. I spent the next five days with her, watching movies with her, bringing her food, waiting for her after some tests were done in separate rooms, and just supporting her. She needed this. The guys came by during visiting hours, staying with me until she would come back with a doctor. Sometimes, the tests would take all day, but that was fine, the guys would leave her presents and balloons.

I wonder sometimes what I would do if they weren’t there for me to help me up during these times.

Notes

Julie has cancer. I did it. No going back. No in between. I hope you guys enjoyed it! :D