I Breathe You In With Smoke.
I'd Never Let You Go, My Dear.
TONY
My's. Mya. Mya Preciado.
The girl I haven't talked to in months.
The girl who hasn't left my mind once.
The girl that I loved.
She was in front of me, cleaning the mess she had made from dropping a tray.
I ran over and helped her pick up the dishes. She shakily stood up and took them from me, throwing them in the sink.
"Mya..." I breathed. She turned around, tears streaming down her face as she hugged me tightly, breaking down in front of the diner. I picked her up and carried her into the restrooms, setting her on the bathroom counter. I tried to pull away, but she just hugged me tighter, soaking my shoulder with tears as she gasped for air.
"My, calm down." I whispered.
"I-I m-mi-sse-ed y-y-you." She sobbed, her words barely coherent and muffled from the fabric of my cut off.
"I missed you too. I'm here, it's okay." I cooed, rubbing her back and kissing the side of her head. She pulled away and I wiped her tears.
"Y-you...you're ok-kay."
"None of us are okay, My's. Ever since you've left, everything's gone to shit."
"They h-haven't h-hurt you have th-they?"
"No. God no." I told her, grabbing a paper towel and dampening it, wiping under her eyes. She looked down.
"Don't hate me.." Mya sniffled.
"Hate you? Never." I grabbed her hands and she stiffened. I looked down to see scabbing, jagged cuts lining her wrists.
"Babe-"
"I-I'm sorry! The nightmares got bad again a-and I..." She dropped her gaze as her body shook with another sob.
It broke my heart to see her this torn. She was doing so well...
I pulled her into another hug and picked her up, feeling her skinny legs wrap around my waist.
"Let's go home."
"No!"
"Please, we're not mad at you. We just want you back..."
"It's n-not safe."
"Hey, look at me." I told her, nudging my shoulder to get her head up. She obeyed, her tear glistening orbs burning into mine.
"Y-You told us that if we met again, you would come back. You promised." She sighed, throwing her head back into my shoulder.
"I can't face them, Tony.."
MYA
Somehow, Tony had talked me into going over, just long enough to see Jas. He'd talked to Rachel, who happily gave him the keys with expectations of having the car back and full of gas by the time she had gotten off work at 8.
My heart pounded like an 808 drum, barely being able to focus on the soft music playing in the car as Tony drove. I kept my gaze out the window, my chin on top of my knees that were pulled up to my chest.
I wasn't sure how I felt about Tony finding me. I mean, Kevin and Lauren hadn't bothered to come after either of us, but was it really safe?
I looked over at Tony as he grabbed my hand, looking over at me with a smile as he stopped at a red light.
He looked so different. He had gotten another neck tattoo and sewn up his ears, but he was still the same Tony that I had always remembered...always loved.
"Y'know, Jasmine's pregnant." I smiled and nodded.
"How far along now?"
"About 8 1/2 months. She should be due in early November."
"Boy or girl?"
"Girl." He smiled wide and tightened his grip on my hand.
"I missed you. I'm so glad I found you."
"Yeah." I whispered.
around an hour later we had pulled into the all too familiar house. I felt my eyes well up at the sight of it. Tony squeezed my hand before letting it go and hopping out of the car. He walked over and opened the door for me, closing it after I had climbed out. He ran his thumb across my cheekbone and I blushed, keeping my gaze to the ground.
"I-I'm sorry. I just..." He whispered, dipping his head to capture my lips in a kiss. I felt my heart race.
I had missed those lips that made me fly.
He pulled away and sighed.
"Um..."
"It's okay." I told him as I gnawed on my bottom lip, feeling my cheeks flush. He looked up, his eyes glistening as he grabbed my hand and walked up to the door. I took a deep breath and nodded, watching the key go into the hole, twist, and click. I watched the door open, letting out a shaky breath.
This place hasn't changed. So many memories came back that I just wanted to drop to my knees and burst into tears.
"Who is it?!" I heard Jas scream. I smiled.
"Me!" Tony screamed. "Can you come down for a second?!" I heard Vic's door open, watching Poppy book it down the stairs and scratch at my leg, barking and whining.
"Hey baby.." I whispered, kneeling down and scratching her head.
"I thought you guys went to a- No.. T-That's not..." I looked up at her as a tear streamed down her face.
"It's you.." She choked out. I nodded and wrapped her in a hug.
"I missed you." I whispered, pulling away and looking down at her swollen belly. I laughed through my tears.
"Well, someone's getting big."
"Around 27 more days left." I smiled and pulled her back into me. Tony's phone started ringing and I heard him say my name shakily. I looked back at him and cocked my head to the side.
"It's Vic... Should I-" I walked over and grabbed the phone. He looked at me wide eyed as I pressed answer and put it to my ear.
"THE PADRE'S LOST MAN! AND WE LOST YOU!" He chuckled. "Where the hell are you?"
"Vic..." It went dead silent for a moment.
"No. You're fucking with me. This isn't funny.." I sniffled and shook my head.
"It's Mya."
"O-Oh my God... My. Okay, don't move. We'll be home in 20 minutes."
"But it's a two hour drive... Be careful, please?"
"I love you, My's. GUYS LET'S FUCKING-" I heard before a dial tone was in my ear. I laughed and handed Tony back his phone.
"Oh, this should be interesting." I whispered. "So, does the little one have a name?"
"Either Victoria or Amelia."
"Victoria, I get it." I giggled. Jas rolled her eyes.
"I though the same thing." Tony mumbled, throwing his arm around me with a smirk.
"Smart asses." We all busted out laughing. "I've missed you so much, babe."
"I missed you too, beautiful." I told her, giving her another tight hug.
"Tony!" I screamed. "St-stop it!" He laughed and flicked more flour at me. I scrunched up my face as I felt some splatter on my cheek.
We'd tried to make dinner, but things weren't working out too well.
"That's it!" I giggled, grabbing a handful of the powder and blowing some at him. He narrowed his eyes at me as mine widened, going to take off as he grabbed me from behind. I huffed in protest and fought against his grip.
"Tone.. Lemme go!" He rubbed his stubbled cheek against mine and I screeched.
"That's what you get for getting flour all over me!"
"Are you kidding?! I have to drive home like this, Jerk!" I told him, grabbing more flour and pelting him with it, both of us jumping when we heard the front door swing open.
"WHERE IS SHE?!" We heard Vic scream. He ran into the kitchen, stopping in his tracks at the mess that we had made. I looked at him with an innocent smile. He laughed and attacked me in a hug.
"I've missed you so much, and I didn't tell the guys. I didn't know if you wanted them to-"
"Why the hell is there flour by the front door?" I heard Mike laugh. "Jas, your stomach can't affect your vision that much!" He screamed upstairs to a sleeping Jas. I stiffled a laugh and walked out.
"Yeah, sorry about that..." I mumbled. Jaime and Mikes' jaws dropped, eyes wide and frozen in place.
"No..."
"Yes." Jaime ran up and hugged me tightly, picking me off of the ground and spinning me in a circle.
"You're here..." He pulled away as tears pricked at his eyes. I frowned.
"Don't cry.. I've seen enough of that today."
"i'm sorry I was such a dick. I love you, and holy shit... You're here." He repeated. I laughed and kissed his cheek.
"I told you, all was forgiven." I reassured before walking over to Mike.
"Hey, Mikes."
"Fuck, I've been so worried about you." He breathed, pulling me into a tight hug, putting his chin on top of my head.
"I found her working at Ruby's Diner.." Tony mumbled, walking out with a damp wash cloth and wiping his face.
"Wait, we were like 2 miles away, and we didn't fucking know?!"
"If it wasn't pouring outside and I didn't run into that diner, we still wouldnt've." he mumbled, turning my cheek. I blushed as he wiped my cheek with a smile.
"Guys, I really have to get back home.."
"What?! No!" They all screamed.
"This is home, beautiful." Jaime told me. I shook my head.
"Not anymore. I have a job now, an apartment with a roommate. I can't just throw it all away."
"W-We'll get you a job. A merch girl or something."
"Guys, thank you.. Really, but I have a long drive back. It was nice seeing you all."
"So you don't want to come back?" Tony asked, his voice wobbling as he spoke. I grabbed his hand dropping it from my face.
"I do. Just.. I don't know. Let me figure it all out."
"Can we atleast have your number?" Mike asked as he held out his phone. I nodded hesitantly and took his phone from him entering my number.
"You're not giving us a fake one, right?" I rolled my eyes, and called my phone, it ringing seconds later.
"There, happy? Everyone get it from Mike. I really gotta go, Rachel's going to be pissed if I leave her stranded."
"We'll drive you."
"No, it's a two hour drive. I'll be fine on my own, Jaime. Thanks though." He sighed and wrapped me in another tight hug.
"I love you little sis, promise you won't leave us?" I bit my lip, burying my head into his shoulder.
"I-I... Yeah. I love you too, Himes." I felt the Fuentes brothers join in and I laughed.
"Way to ruin the moment, assholes." Jaime chuckled.
"We loooooove you, My's." Vic sang.
"I need air.." I choked out as they squeezed me tighter. Everyone quickly let go and I smiled.
"Tell Jas that I said I love her too.." Vic bit back a smile and nodded before I felt Tony grab my hand and walk me outside.
"Y'know, if you wanted a hug you c-" I trailed off, feeling his lips on mine. I felt him bite my lip and I gasped slightly as he pulled away.
"O-Oh, that's what you wanted." I blushed, licking my lips as I still tasted him.
"Goodnight, beautiful. Drive safe." He told me, wrapping me in a tight, warm hug. I nodded and took Rachel's keys from him.
"Thank you for finding me, Tony."
"Thank you for allowing us all back in. Text me and let me know you got home okay." I nodded and shuffled my way to the car.
"Bye Tonester." He smiled slightly and waved, watching my brights back out of their driveway and speed off.
I couldn't let my past separate me from them again. I needed to realize that Kevin and Lauren weren't my family; they were. I needed to keep my true family this time, and let go of the so called one that I'd kept in my head.
I had it all wrong this whole time, but is it too late to redeem myself?
My's. Mya. Mya Preciado.
The girl I haven't talked to in months.
The girl who hasn't left my mind once.
The girl that I loved.
She was in front of me, cleaning the mess she had made from dropping a tray.
I ran over and helped her pick up the dishes. She shakily stood up and took them from me, throwing them in the sink.
"Mya..." I breathed. She turned around, tears streaming down her face as she hugged me tightly, breaking down in front of the diner. I picked her up and carried her into the restrooms, setting her on the bathroom counter. I tried to pull away, but she just hugged me tighter, soaking my shoulder with tears as she gasped for air.
"My, calm down." I whispered.
"I-I m-mi-sse-ed y-y-you." She sobbed, her words barely coherent and muffled from the fabric of my cut off.
"I missed you too. I'm here, it's okay." I cooed, rubbing her back and kissing the side of her head. She pulled away and I wiped her tears.
"Y-you...you're ok-kay."
"None of us are okay, My's. Ever since you've left, everything's gone to shit."
"They h-haven't h-hurt you have th-they?"
"No. God no." I told her, grabbing a paper towel and dampening it, wiping under her eyes. She looked down.
"Don't hate me.." Mya sniffled.
"Hate you? Never." I grabbed her hands and she stiffened. I looked down to see scabbing, jagged cuts lining her wrists.
"Babe-"
"I-I'm sorry! The nightmares got bad again a-and I..." She dropped her gaze as her body shook with another sob.
It broke my heart to see her this torn. She was doing so well...
I pulled her into another hug and picked her up, feeling her skinny legs wrap around my waist.
"Let's go home."
"No!"
"Please, we're not mad at you. We just want you back..."
"It's n-not safe."
"Hey, look at me." I told her, nudging my shoulder to get her head up. She obeyed, her tear glistening orbs burning into mine.
"Y-You told us that if we met again, you would come back. You promised." She sighed, throwing her head back into my shoulder.
"I can't face them, Tony.."
MYA
Somehow, Tony had talked me into going over, just long enough to see Jas. He'd talked to Rachel, who happily gave him the keys with expectations of having the car back and full of gas by the time she had gotten off work at 8.
My heart pounded like an 808 drum, barely being able to focus on the soft music playing in the car as Tony drove. I kept my gaze out the window, my chin on top of my knees that were pulled up to my chest.
I wasn't sure how I felt about Tony finding me. I mean, Kevin and Lauren hadn't bothered to come after either of us, but was it really safe?
I looked over at Tony as he grabbed my hand, looking over at me with a smile as he stopped at a red light.
He looked so different. He had gotten another neck tattoo and sewn up his ears, but he was still the same Tony that I had always remembered...always loved.
"Y'know, Jasmine's pregnant." I smiled and nodded.
"How far along now?"
"About 8 1/2 months. She should be due in early November."
"Boy or girl?"
"Girl." He smiled wide and tightened his grip on my hand.
"I missed you. I'm so glad I found you."
"Yeah." I whispered.
around an hour later we had pulled into the all too familiar house. I felt my eyes well up at the sight of it. Tony squeezed my hand before letting it go and hopping out of the car. He walked over and opened the door for me, closing it after I had climbed out. He ran his thumb across my cheekbone and I blushed, keeping my gaze to the ground.
"I-I'm sorry. I just..." He whispered, dipping his head to capture my lips in a kiss. I felt my heart race.
I had missed those lips that made me fly.
He pulled away and sighed.
"Um..."
"It's okay." I told him as I gnawed on my bottom lip, feeling my cheeks flush. He looked up, his eyes glistening as he grabbed my hand and walked up to the door. I took a deep breath and nodded, watching the key go into the hole, twist, and click. I watched the door open, letting out a shaky breath.
This place hasn't changed. So many memories came back that I just wanted to drop to my knees and burst into tears.
"Who is it?!" I heard Jas scream. I smiled.
"Me!" Tony screamed. "Can you come down for a second?!" I heard Vic's door open, watching Poppy book it down the stairs and scratch at my leg, barking and whining.
"Hey baby.." I whispered, kneeling down and scratching her head.
"I thought you guys went to a- No.. T-That's not..." I looked up at her as a tear streamed down her face.
"It's you.." She choked out. I nodded and wrapped her in a hug.
"I missed you." I whispered, pulling away and looking down at her swollen belly. I laughed through my tears.
"Well, someone's getting big."
"Around 27 more days left." I smiled and pulled her back into me. Tony's phone started ringing and I heard him say my name shakily. I looked back at him and cocked my head to the side.
"It's Vic... Should I-" I walked over and grabbed the phone. He looked at me wide eyed as I pressed answer and put it to my ear.
"THE PADRE'S LOST MAN! AND WE LOST YOU!" He chuckled. "Where the hell are you?"
"Vic..." It went dead silent for a moment.
"No. You're fucking with me. This isn't funny.." I sniffled and shook my head.
"It's Mya."
"O-Oh my God... My. Okay, don't move. We'll be home in 20 minutes."
"But it's a two hour drive... Be careful, please?"
"I love you, My's. GUYS LET'S FUCKING-" I heard before a dial tone was in my ear. I laughed and handed Tony back his phone.
"Oh, this should be interesting." I whispered. "So, does the little one have a name?"
"Either Victoria or Amelia."
"Victoria, I get it." I giggled. Jas rolled her eyes.
"I though the same thing." Tony mumbled, throwing his arm around me with a smirk.
"Smart asses." We all busted out laughing. "I've missed you so much, babe."
"I missed you too, beautiful." I told her, giving her another tight hug.
"Tony!" I screamed. "St-stop it!" He laughed and flicked more flour at me. I scrunched up my face as I felt some splatter on my cheek.
We'd tried to make dinner, but things weren't working out too well.
"That's it!" I giggled, grabbing a handful of the powder and blowing some at him. He narrowed his eyes at me as mine widened, going to take off as he grabbed me from behind. I huffed in protest and fought against his grip.
"Tone.. Lemme go!" He rubbed his stubbled cheek against mine and I screeched.
"That's what you get for getting flour all over me!"
"Are you kidding?! I have to drive home like this, Jerk!" I told him, grabbing more flour and pelting him with it, both of us jumping when we heard the front door swing open.
"WHERE IS SHE?!" We heard Vic scream. He ran into the kitchen, stopping in his tracks at the mess that we had made. I looked at him with an innocent smile. He laughed and attacked me in a hug.
"I've missed you so much, and I didn't tell the guys. I didn't know if you wanted them to-"
"Why the hell is there flour by the front door?" I heard Mike laugh. "Jas, your stomach can't affect your vision that much!" He screamed upstairs to a sleeping Jas. I stiffled a laugh and walked out.
"Yeah, sorry about that..." I mumbled. Jaime and Mikes' jaws dropped, eyes wide and frozen in place.
"No..."
"Yes." Jaime ran up and hugged me tightly, picking me off of the ground and spinning me in a circle.
"You're here..." He pulled away as tears pricked at his eyes. I frowned.
"Don't cry.. I've seen enough of that today."
"i'm sorry I was such a dick. I love you, and holy shit... You're here." He repeated. I laughed and kissed his cheek.
"I told you, all was forgiven." I reassured before walking over to Mike.
"Hey, Mikes."
"Fuck, I've been so worried about you." He breathed, pulling me into a tight hug, putting his chin on top of my head.
"I found her working at Ruby's Diner.." Tony mumbled, walking out with a damp wash cloth and wiping his face.
"Wait, we were like 2 miles away, and we didn't fucking know?!"
"If it wasn't pouring outside and I didn't run into that diner, we still wouldnt've." he mumbled, turning my cheek. I blushed as he wiped my cheek with a smile.
"Guys, I really have to get back home.."
"What?! No!" They all screamed.
"This is home, beautiful." Jaime told me. I shook my head.
"Not anymore. I have a job now, an apartment with a roommate. I can't just throw it all away."
"W-We'll get you a job. A merch girl or something."
"Guys, thank you.. Really, but I have a long drive back. It was nice seeing you all."
"So you don't want to come back?" Tony asked, his voice wobbling as he spoke. I grabbed his hand dropping it from my face.
"I do. Just.. I don't know. Let me figure it all out."
"Can we atleast have your number?" Mike asked as he held out his phone. I nodded hesitantly and took his phone from him entering my number.
"You're not giving us a fake one, right?" I rolled my eyes, and called my phone, it ringing seconds later.
"There, happy? Everyone get it from Mike. I really gotta go, Rachel's going to be pissed if I leave her stranded."
"We'll drive you."
"No, it's a two hour drive. I'll be fine on my own, Jaime. Thanks though." He sighed and wrapped me in another tight hug.
"I love you little sis, promise you won't leave us?" I bit my lip, burying my head into his shoulder.
"I-I... Yeah. I love you too, Himes." I felt the Fuentes brothers join in and I laughed.
"Way to ruin the moment, assholes." Jaime chuckled.
"We loooooove you, My's." Vic sang.
"I need air.." I choked out as they squeezed me tighter. Everyone quickly let go and I smiled.
"Tell Jas that I said I love her too.." Vic bit back a smile and nodded before I felt Tony grab my hand and walk me outside.
"Y'know, if you wanted a hug you c-" I trailed off, feeling his lips on mine. I felt him bite my lip and I gasped slightly as he pulled away.
"O-Oh, that's what you wanted." I blushed, licking my lips as I still tasted him.
"Goodnight, beautiful. Drive safe." He told me, wrapping me in a tight, warm hug. I nodded and took Rachel's keys from him.
"Thank you for finding me, Tony."
"Thank you for allowing us all back in. Text me and let me know you got home okay." I nodded and shuffled my way to the car.
"Bye Tonester." He smiled slightly and waved, watching my brights back out of their driveway and speed off.
I couldn't let my past separate me from them again. I needed to realize that Kevin and Lauren weren't my family; they were. I needed to keep my true family this time, and let go of the so called one that I'd kept in my head.
I had it all wrong this whole time, but is it too late to redeem myself?
Notes
Sorry, I thought that the flour fight thing was just the cutest.
And sorry for the delay. You can blame Pewdiepie, Tumblr, and my guitar. I just wanted to make this all cute and perfect before it got... Idk, sad again (MAYBE), and I kept getting distracted xD
2 more chapters left! JAS IS GOING TO HAVE THE BABY NEXT CHAPPY YAYAYAYAYAY
I'll try to post one more chapter tonight, if I can't then I will tomorrow. I still need to update my ADTR fic, which should be updated tomorrow as well, for those who are reading that. haha.
I love you darling!
-Cass
sequel pleeeease :D
5/14/14