The Tour Life Of Adriana Perry
The Calm Before The Storm
“Bianca, hurry up. You have school!” I called from the kitchen. Back to the usual routine, running around like headless chickens. I could hear her laughing in the living area. I rolled my eyes as I packed her lunch. Putting her bag on the table, I went into the living area. There she was, led on the couch being tickled by James.
“Breakfast now.” I said in a stern voice. James got up, Bianca ran past me and into the kitchen. I was about to say something when Kellin came bounding downstairs while still getting himself dressed. “Late?”
“Major. Have you seen my hat?” I nodded towards the kitchen. By now James had got up and gone upstairs. This was going to get worse before it gets better. I was prepared for the storm. I grabbed my coat and Bianca's, slipping it on her as she came back through with her lunch bag in her hands. I put mine on, grabbed my keys from the hook. “I'll be back soon.” I'll called. I got Bianca in the car and myself. I just turned the engine on when Kellin jumped in. “Where to?”
“Studios. Take the little one to school first.” he smiled. I put the radio on and off we went. The drive was quiet. Bianca was singing along, I was concentrating on my driving and Kellin was muttering away to himself. He seemed shifty. We soon arrived at the school, I jumped out grabbing Bianca and into the school. This was always a rush, we never seemed to get here on time.
“Right, studios next. Kels, have you been taking this morning?” I asked getting back into the car. He didn't respond, I dropped the subject. He didn't say anything the rest of the journey. I didn't know what to say if I'm honest. My main fear was him trying to drag me back into the drugs game. “What time do you want picking up?”
“Give me an hour. Then I should be ready.” with a slight hug, he got out and went. I sunk into the seat, letting out a heavy sigh as I watched him walk away. A small smile came onto my lips. It would be ruined by the time I got back home. Because I knew I still had to deal with James. I set off back, thinking about what I was going to say to him. I had no idea, too many things in my mind.
As I pulled up outside the house, I sat there for a few minutes. I slowly turned the engine off and got out. Sighing I opened the front door and went in. Throwing my bag down by the door, they keys on the rack. “I'm back.” I called through.
“In the kitchen.” Well here goes nothing I guess. I set off through and straight away I was engulfed in a hug. Now I should be mad at him but straight away I wrapped my own arms round him. It felt good, everything seemed to fade away. “I'm sorry.”
I was snapped back to reality. “Sorry? You're sorry? You did what you did and now you're apologising. Are you actually sorry or just sorry you got caught?”
“I'm actuall---” I cut him off by slapping him. I stood there glaring at him. I couldn't even process my words right now. But I didn't want to be mad at him, I just wanted a peaceful life. I sighed before apologising and heading out back for a smoke. I lit it up, inhaling deep. It was taken from me. As usual. “You're not allowed.”
“It doesn't matter now.” I replied, taking my smoke back from him. I was hoping he'd catch on so I didn't have to say the words. I couldn't process the words to even say them. He pulled me into another hug, I felt the tears ready to escape but I couldn't allow myself to be weak. I blinked rapidly before I could at him properly.
“Can I have the bed back?” I shook my head. He rolled his eyes and went back inside.
“What?” I called into the house. Refusing to move from where I was. I wasn't going to run after him.
“You're being stupid. I said sorry.” I heard him shout back.
“Sorry isn't good enough when you cheat on your then pregnant girlfriend.” I yelled back. The doors to patio slammed shut. I heard the lock go. Great. He had locked me out. That's alright. I'll sit out here, ignoring him even more. It wasn't long till a piece of clothing landed in front of me. “Are you kidding me?” I muttered, standing up to look up at the window.
“This is my house. Take your stuff and leave.” A few more things came out of the window. I laughed a little. He was kicking me out? Shouldn't it be me kicking him out? After all I didn't cheat on him. Due to the commotion, Brandi came out of her house. She looked at me, then up at the window. I shrugged my shoulders. “Oh here she is, the one who's turning my own girlfriend against me.”
“Ha. Nice one. Grow up and let her in.” Brandi yelled up to the window. A picture came flying out the window. I heard the window shut before I picked up the picture. Oh how very nice. It was one of me, him and Bianca. One that was taken before I stopped touring. “What's all that about?”
“I kicked him out of our room, now he's kicking me out.” I snorted at the last bit. She helped me gather my stuff up and let me into her house. I remembered I had to pick Kellin up. She let me use her car and off I went. I couldn't believe I had been kicked out of my own house for doing nothing wrong. Here's me thinking that when he got back, we'd be able to talk things through and be a normal couple. Is there such a thing as a normal couple? I was so caught up in my own thoughts, I didn't realise Kellin was now in my car. Him coughing brought me back to reality. I decided not to go back yet, I'd let him calm down before I went back because I did not need a full scale argument kicking off when I had visitors. Plus this was all part of my game.
“How did it go?” I broke the silence first.
“I have to clean up my act before I'm allowed back. Which means the new album is being put on hold.”
“Well you'll have me to help you. I won't let you down.” I smiled at him. He took my hand and squeezed it a bit. I found a parking space and got out. I had to go to the music shop first. I was going to treat myself to a new guitar, maybe buy Bianca her first one. As we wandered round the shop, me and Kellin laughed and joked about things. Just like old times . I spotted a guitar, a pink one. “It'll be perfect for her.”
“She'll be a singer.” Kellin said.
“What? No. She'll be a guitarist. Just like me.” I nudged him slightly.
“You're a drummer.” He had a point. I was actually a drummer. I rolled my eyes and picked the guitar up. We found a new one for me as well. I went to pay when Kellin whipped out his card and payed. I looked at him confused. He smiled and shrugged it off. We put them back in the car before heading back into the hustle and bustle of town. It was a fun time as we went shopping, tried on silly outfits and just acted like fools. It felt nice to be able to actually have a joke around.
By the time we had got back, James had gone to collect Bianca from school. I set all the bags on the sofa and headed into the kitchen. A note was stuck to the fridge. It read:
Taking Bianca to see her Uncle Ben, be back around 7.
James x
I screwed the note up and threw it in the bin. I was more mad at him now. He knew I had plans for my family to come round and have dinner with us. A few knocks rang through the house. Kellin went to answer it while I just stood there in the kitchen wondering what to do now about tonight's plans. “Hii baby doll.” Mike was the first to talk to me.
“Hey Uncle Mike. Change of plan, James has taken Bianca to Ben's so no family meal.” I sighed.
“We'll go to Bruce's house then.” I didn't think that would be a good idea but I agreed to it anyway. We grabbed our stuff and walked out. The walk wasn't that far. I managed to catch up with my 3 uncles. They told me all about the end of tour pranks, the fans that constantly asked about me. I hated the fact I had missed it all. Then the conversation turned to me. “So how's the new member doing?”
I didn't answer. I swallowed hard and looked at the ground. I didn't want to say the words. I hadn't even told James properly about it. When we arrived, we just walked straight in. Ben came straight up to me, pulling me into a tight hug. Had he really missed me that much? I hugged him back and explained quietly why everyone was at his. “We'll order pizza.”
“Pizza? Is that the crap food you give my daughter?” I laughed, prodding his chest.
“Yeah, just about.” I shook my head and got situated on the single chair in the corner. Everyone else made themselves at home. I could feel Jaime watching me as I wriggled. I was still getting stomach cramps and it wasn't very comfortable for me at all. I shot him a smile, sort of a reassuring smile so I didn't have to deal with the whole 20 questions. My attention soon turned to James and Bianca who were both led on the floor, chin on their hands and watching the television. I couldn't help but smile at the sight but I was still mad at him. Kellin was watching my every move as well.
After pizza, a good chat with everyone I decided to get Bianca home and to bed ready for the next day. Kellin stayed at Ben's while James came back with me. I was thankful he had stayed because with the tension between me and James I could feel a full scale argument about to erupt. I'm not talking the petty shouting. Oh hell no, I'm talking about screaming, throwing things etc etc. The kind of argument where you say things you later regret. I sighed to myself as I left Bianca's room knowing full well what was awaiting me downstairs. Did I want to argue with him? No. But sooner or later it was going to happen.
As I arrived back downstairs, he was sprawled out on the sofa flicking through the television. I walked straight past and into the kitchen. Nothing was said by him. “Do you want a drink?” I called into him.
“No.” Well that was a little blunt. I stood in the doorway, watching him.
“You're mad at me, it should be the other way round. But if you want to act childish then so be it.” I snapped.
“I'm going to sleep.” With that he turned the television off and turned over. I let out a frustrated groan before sitting myself at the kitchen table to sort out bills and other household things. I kept looking into the living area, just in case he was actually awake and willing to talk to me. He hates me. I know it.
This was just a bit too much for me. I hated when people ignored me for no reason. Or did I actually do something wrong? I heard the front door open. I knew who it would be. “I expected to come back to flying objects.” Kellin laughed a bit.
“Mr. Grumpy Pants is ignoring me.” I didn't take my eyes off the water bill that was in front of me. I didn't want to think about it right now. Kellin sat next to me and began helping me out with all the figures.
“How much do you bring in?” he spoke, balancing a pen between his lips.
“Whatever merch is sold. My uncles give me my dad's cut. Then I should get 50 a week of Dylan but I get nothing.” I replied, shifting the papers around.
“What about him over there?” I shrugged. I wasn't sure what he brought in if I was honest. The conversation ended there. After a few hours we had managed to sort all the bills out and we went to bed.
***
“Bianca don't wake your mum up!” I heard a voice shout. I heard a patter of feet outside my room. Suddenly my door flew open and there stood my little girl.
“Mom, why is Kel in your bed?” she spoke. Just at that moment James appeared. He took Bianca downstairs, completely disregarding what she had just said and what they had just seen. Well I wasn't going to let him sleep on the floor was I? It meant nothing him being in the bed, but I sure as hell was going to hear about it later. I heaved myself out of bed and wandered downstairs just in time to say goodbye to my daughter. James muttered a bye before they left.
I popped some bread in the toaster, turned the kettle on and rested against the worktop. “Morning everyone.”
“Hey Brandi, she's just left.”
“Yeah I saw, listen I'm throwing a party for Delia. Fancy coming?” she grinned at me. I pondered on it for a moment.
“Count me in. I'll ask my uncles to have Bianca for the night.” I smiled back at her.
“Great. Bring James and thingy.” I laughed when she said thingy.
“You mean Kellin right?”
“Yeah. So plans for the day?” She was unusually hyper for this time in a morning. My brain couldn't take it. It reminded me of when I was constantly on tour when I was younger with Jaime. He was always the first one up, even on this most recent one. He was always up first, bouncing around like a puppy on a constant sugar rush.
“I'm heading over to the studio's where James goes. Going to see if I can get my band back. Then might take James for lunch.”
“Oh you're boring. After the studio, we're going shopping. We need some girly time.” I nodded in agreement. I could use some girly time. What harm could it possibly do? Well it could make things worse but I'd deal with that at a later date. I shoved a piece of toast in my mouth and nodded. “Right, meet back here at 1. Laters.” With that she was gone.
I stayed in the kitchen until James arrived back from taking Bianca to school. It felt weird not doing the whole morning routine but it was also nice to have a break from rushing around. “How do you manage to get there late everyday?”
“Because a little girl knows how to make her mom stressed.” I stated.
“I got her there on time though?” I rolled my eyes. Look at me, I'm oh so perfect because I can run on time. “I'm off out with the lads, then I'll pick her up when she's finished.”
“Alright. Well I'm off to the studio then with Brandi. Not sure what Kel--”
“Don't even mention his name. You're confusing your daughter.” I choked a little on my water. Was he giving me parenting advice?
“Excuse me? Bianca fully understands that me and Kellin are just friends.”
“Yeah, you sure looked like 'just friends' this morning.” I slammed my glass down on the table.
“Says the guy who cheated on his pregnant girlfriend.” My voice raised a little. This was the beginning of the hell that was about to break loose.
“You're not that perfect yourself.” I picked the glass back up, hurling it towards him. Shame it missed, colliding with the wall. Shattering into a hundred pieces. “Oh throwing things now are we?”
“Damn right I am. Tell me James, what went through your mind whilst you were fucking some other chick?” He fell silent. Looking away from me. “That's what I thought.” I made my way out the kitchen, ready to go upstairs when he grabbed my arm, pulling me back.
“Two can play at this game.” he whispered. A smirk danced on his lips. I knew exactly what he meant by it as a small smirk played on mine.
Prepare to lose, Cassells.
“Breakfast now.” I said in a stern voice. James got up, Bianca ran past me and into the kitchen. I was about to say something when Kellin came bounding downstairs while still getting himself dressed. “Late?”
“Major. Have you seen my hat?” I nodded towards the kitchen. By now James had got up and gone upstairs. This was going to get worse before it gets better. I was prepared for the storm. I grabbed my coat and Bianca's, slipping it on her as she came back through with her lunch bag in her hands. I put mine on, grabbed my keys from the hook. “I'll be back soon.” I'll called. I got Bianca in the car and myself. I just turned the engine on when Kellin jumped in. “Where to?”
“Studios. Take the little one to school first.” he smiled. I put the radio on and off we went. The drive was quiet. Bianca was singing along, I was concentrating on my driving and Kellin was muttering away to himself. He seemed shifty. We soon arrived at the school, I jumped out grabbing Bianca and into the school. This was always a rush, we never seemed to get here on time.
“Right, studios next. Kels, have you been taking this morning?” I asked getting back into the car. He didn't respond, I dropped the subject. He didn't say anything the rest of the journey. I didn't know what to say if I'm honest. My main fear was him trying to drag me back into the drugs game. “What time do you want picking up?”
“Give me an hour. Then I should be ready.” with a slight hug, he got out and went. I sunk into the seat, letting out a heavy sigh as I watched him walk away. A small smile came onto my lips. It would be ruined by the time I got back home. Because I knew I still had to deal with James. I set off back, thinking about what I was going to say to him. I had no idea, too many things in my mind.
As I pulled up outside the house, I sat there for a few minutes. I slowly turned the engine off and got out. Sighing I opened the front door and went in. Throwing my bag down by the door, they keys on the rack. “I'm back.” I called through.
“In the kitchen.” Well here goes nothing I guess. I set off through and straight away I was engulfed in a hug. Now I should be mad at him but straight away I wrapped my own arms round him. It felt good, everything seemed to fade away. “I'm sorry.”
I was snapped back to reality. “Sorry? You're sorry? You did what you did and now you're apologising. Are you actually sorry or just sorry you got caught?”
“I'm actuall---” I cut him off by slapping him. I stood there glaring at him. I couldn't even process my words right now. But I didn't want to be mad at him, I just wanted a peaceful life. I sighed before apologising and heading out back for a smoke. I lit it up, inhaling deep. It was taken from me. As usual. “You're not allowed.”
“It doesn't matter now.” I replied, taking my smoke back from him. I was hoping he'd catch on so I didn't have to say the words. I couldn't process the words to even say them. He pulled me into another hug, I felt the tears ready to escape but I couldn't allow myself to be weak. I blinked rapidly before I could at him properly.
“Can I have the bed back?” I shook my head. He rolled his eyes and went back inside.
“What?” I called into the house. Refusing to move from where I was. I wasn't going to run after him.
“You're being stupid. I said sorry.” I heard him shout back.
“Sorry isn't good enough when you cheat on your then pregnant girlfriend.” I yelled back. The doors to patio slammed shut. I heard the lock go. Great. He had locked me out. That's alright. I'll sit out here, ignoring him even more. It wasn't long till a piece of clothing landed in front of me. “Are you kidding me?” I muttered, standing up to look up at the window.
“This is my house. Take your stuff and leave.” A few more things came out of the window. I laughed a little. He was kicking me out? Shouldn't it be me kicking him out? After all I didn't cheat on him. Due to the commotion, Brandi came out of her house. She looked at me, then up at the window. I shrugged my shoulders. “Oh here she is, the one who's turning my own girlfriend against me.”
“Ha. Nice one. Grow up and let her in.” Brandi yelled up to the window. A picture came flying out the window. I heard the window shut before I picked up the picture. Oh how very nice. It was one of me, him and Bianca. One that was taken before I stopped touring. “What's all that about?”
“I kicked him out of our room, now he's kicking me out.” I snorted at the last bit. She helped me gather my stuff up and let me into her house. I remembered I had to pick Kellin up. She let me use her car and off I went. I couldn't believe I had been kicked out of my own house for doing nothing wrong. Here's me thinking that when he got back, we'd be able to talk things through and be a normal couple. Is there such a thing as a normal couple? I was so caught up in my own thoughts, I didn't realise Kellin was now in my car. Him coughing brought me back to reality. I decided not to go back yet, I'd let him calm down before I went back because I did not need a full scale argument kicking off when I had visitors. Plus this was all part of my game.
“How did it go?” I broke the silence first.
“I have to clean up my act before I'm allowed back. Which means the new album is being put on hold.”
“Well you'll have me to help you. I won't let you down.” I smiled at him. He took my hand and squeezed it a bit. I found a parking space and got out. I had to go to the music shop first. I was going to treat myself to a new guitar, maybe buy Bianca her first one. As we wandered round the shop, me and Kellin laughed and joked about things. Just like old times . I spotted a guitar, a pink one. “It'll be perfect for her.”
“She'll be a singer.” Kellin said.
“What? No. She'll be a guitarist. Just like me.” I nudged him slightly.
“You're a drummer.” He had a point. I was actually a drummer. I rolled my eyes and picked the guitar up. We found a new one for me as well. I went to pay when Kellin whipped out his card and payed. I looked at him confused. He smiled and shrugged it off. We put them back in the car before heading back into the hustle and bustle of town. It was a fun time as we went shopping, tried on silly outfits and just acted like fools. It felt nice to be able to actually have a joke around.
By the time we had got back, James had gone to collect Bianca from school. I set all the bags on the sofa and headed into the kitchen. A note was stuck to the fridge. It read:
Taking Bianca to see her Uncle Ben, be back around 7.
James x
I screwed the note up and threw it in the bin. I was more mad at him now. He knew I had plans for my family to come round and have dinner with us. A few knocks rang through the house. Kellin went to answer it while I just stood there in the kitchen wondering what to do now about tonight's plans. “Hii baby doll.” Mike was the first to talk to me.
“Hey Uncle Mike. Change of plan, James has taken Bianca to Ben's so no family meal.” I sighed.
“We'll go to Bruce's house then.” I didn't think that would be a good idea but I agreed to it anyway. We grabbed our stuff and walked out. The walk wasn't that far. I managed to catch up with my 3 uncles. They told me all about the end of tour pranks, the fans that constantly asked about me. I hated the fact I had missed it all. Then the conversation turned to me. “So how's the new member doing?”
I didn't answer. I swallowed hard and looked at the ground. I didn't want to say the words. I hadn't even told James properly about it. When we arrived, we just walked straight in. Ben came straight up to me, pulling me into a tight hug. Had he really missed me that much? I hugged him back and explained quietly why everyone was at his. “We'll order pizza.”
“Pizza? Is that the crap food you give my daughter?” I laughed, prodding his chest.
“Yeah, just about.” I shook my head and got situated on the single chair in the corner. Everyone else made themselves at home. I could feel Jaime watching me as I wriggled. I was still getting stomach cramps and it wasn't very comfortable for me at all. I shot him a smile, sort of a reassuring smile so I didn't have to deal with the whole 20 questions. My attention soon turned to James and Bianca who were both led on the floor, chin on their hands and watching the television. I couldn't help but smile at the sight but I was still mad at him. Kellin was watching my every move as well.
After pizza, a good chat with everyone I decided to get Bianca home and to bed ready for the next day. Kellin stayed at Ben's while James came back with me. I was thankful he had stayed because with the tension between me and James I could feel a full scale argument about to erupt. I'm not talking the petty shouting. Oh hell no, I'm talking about screaming, throwing things etc etc. The kind of argument where you say things you later regret. I sighed to myself as I left Bianca's room knowing full well what was awaiting me downstairs. Did I want to argue with him? No. But sooner or later it was going to happen.
As I arrived back downstairs, he was sprawled out on the sofa flicking through the television. I walked straight past and into the kitchen. Nothing was said by him. “Do you want a drink?” I called into him.
“No.” Well that was a little blunt. I stood in the doorway, watching him.
“You're mad at me, it should be the other way round. But if you want to act childish then so be it.” I snapped.
“I'm going to sleep.” With that he turned the television off and turned over. I let out a frustrated groan before sitting myself at the kitchen table to sort out bills and other household things. I kept looking into the living area, just in case he was actually awake and willing to talk to me. He hates me. I know it.
This was just a bit too much for me. I hated when people ignored me for no reason. Or did I actually do something wrong? I heard the front door open. I knew who it would be. “I expected to come back to flying objects.” Kellin laughed a bit.
“Mr. Grumpy Pants is ignoring me.” I didn't take my eyes off the water bill that was in front of me. I didn't want to think about it right now. Kellin sat next to me and began helping me out with all the figures.
“How much do you bring in?” he spoke, balancing a pen between his lips.
“Whatever merch is sold. My uncles give me my dad's cut. Then I should get 50 a week of Dylan but I get nothing.” I replied, shifting the papers around.
“What about him over there?” I shrugged. I wasn't sure what he brought in if I was honest. The conversation ended there. After a few hours we had managed to sort all the bills out and we went to bed.
***
“Bianca don't wake your mum up!” I heard a voice shout. I heard a patter of feet outside my room. Suddenly my door flew open and there stood my little girl.
“Mom, why is Kel in your bed?” she spoke. Just at that moment James appeared. He took Bianca downstairs, completely disregarding what she had just said and what they had just seen. Well I wasn't going to let him sleep on the floor was I? It meant nothing him being in the bed, but I sure as hell was going to hear about it later. I heaved myself out of bed and wandered downstairs just in time to say goodbye to my daughter. James muttered a bye before they left.
I popped some bread in the toaster, turned the kettle on and rested against the worktop. “Morning everyone.”
“Hey Brandi, she's just left.”
“Yeah I saw, listen I'm throwing a party for Delia. Fancy coming?” she grinned at me. I pondered on it for a moment.
“Count me in. I'll ask my uncles to have Bianca for the night.” I smiled back at her.
“Great. Bring James and thingy.” I laughed when she said thingy.
“You mean Kellin right?”
“Yeah. So plans for the day?” She was unusually hyper for this time in a morning. My brain couldn't take it. It reminded me of when I was constantly on tour when I was younger with Jaime. He was always the first one up, even on this most recent one. He was always up first, bouncing around like a puppy on a constant sugar rush.
“I'm heading over to the studio's where James goes. Going to see if I can get my band back. Then might take James for lunch.”
“Oh you're boring. After the studio, we're going shopping. We need some girly time.” I nodded in agreement. I could use some girly time. What harm could it possibly do? Well it could make things worse but I'd deal with that at a later date. I shoved a piece of toast in my mouth and nodded. “Right, meet back here at 1. Laters.” With that she was gone.
I stayed in the kitchen until James arrived back from taking Bianca to school. It felt weird not doing the whole morning routine but it was also nice to have a break from rushing around. “How do you manage to get there late everyday?”
“Because a little girl knows how to make her mom stressed.” I stated.
“I got her there on time though?” I rolled my eyes. Look at me, I'm oh so perfect because I can run on time. “I'm off out with the lads, then I'll pick her up when she's finished.”
“Alright. Well I'm off to the studio then with Brandi. Not sure what Kel--”
“Don't even mention his name. You're confusing your daughter.” I choked a little on my water. Was he giving me parenting advice?
“Excuse me? Bianca fully understands that me and Kellin are just friends.”
“Yeah, you sure looked like 'just friends' this morning.” I slammed my glass down on the table.
“Says the guy who cheated on his pregnant girlfriend.” My voice raised a little. This was the beginning of the hell that was about to break loose.
“You're not that perfect yourself.” I picked the glass back up, hurling it towards him. Shame it missed, colliding with the wall. Shattering into a hundred pieces. “Oh throwing things now are we?”
“Damn right I am. Tell me James, what went through your mind whilst you were fucking some other chick?” He fell silent. Looking away from me. “That's what I thought.” I made my way out the kitchen, ready to go upstairs when he grabbed my arm, pulling me back.
“Two can play at this game.” he whispered. A smirk danced on his lips. I knew exactly what he meant by it as a small smirk played on mine.
Prepare to lose, Cassells.
10/16/13