Can We Lose Our Minds?

Numbness overwhelmed me.

It was over.

It was finally over.

But, at what cost?

My chest tightened up in anguish.He was dead. He was dead. There was nothing left of him here on Earth.

Nothing.

Relief. I felt relief, too. I had stayed true to myself. I knew who I was, finally. I was Spencer Martin, whose biological family and foster family tragically died in an aggravated arson attack. I was Spencer Martin, a finally innocent girl. Completely innocent. Not a single person’s blood dripping from my fingertips. It was over.

He was dead.

Drew Sanders reign of terror was over. But, to our utter horror, he had to go out with one final spark, didn’t he?

His hand remained clutched to his stomach, but I watched as realization struck his face.

Oh, God, Jaime only had seconds before the fire reached him… Oh, God, the fire was everywhere.

The devil was everywhere.

Before I could even scream his name, a heavy cloud of smoke overtook us. I couldn’t see anyone, for the blazing fire blinded my vision. I couldn’t hear anyone, either, for the searing flames killed my eardrums. I also couldn’t breath, for the smoke filled my lungs.

It wasn’t something I was unfamiliar to, though…

I stumbled around in the odd mixture of dark and light, and I bumped into someone in the process.

“…Vic…” I hissed as I noticed his body still slumped on the floor. I pushed the thought of Jaime out of my head, knowing, deep down, that Vic actually had more of a chance than him… I shook my head. I couldn’t think, I just had to act. Vic was here, and he needed me.

I reached down and gripped his arms, his body completely submissive to my movements. “This is going to hurt, Vic, I’m so sorry…” I said into his ear, as if he could actually hear me, before hooking my arms through his underarms and dragging him to the sliding door that I knew was nearby… somewhere…

Finally, I felt the solid glass on my hand. I reached around for the handle to slide it open, but as my hand searched, I found that it was already open. I lifted Vic up a little more to make it through the threshold of the door, and, at last, air.

I dragged him as far away from the burning house as possible. Finally, I gently dropped him down into the grass. I needed to go back in there… I knew I needed to find Mike, or Tony, or… Jaime… but Vic’s neck wound looked close to fatal, and he, I hated to think it, needed me more.

I pressed my palm to his neck again. This was all of my fault… Vic was going to die, and it was my fault… Jaime was dead, I was sure, and it was all of my fault… and where was Mike and Tony? Everything was my fault…

I mentally slapped myself. I couldn’t be thinking these thoughts right now. I had to focus on Vic. I had to do something. I held his wounds carefully, yelling at myself in my head. This is not your fault! This is all Drew Sanders. You did nothing wrong. This is not your fault. This is not your fault. This is not your fault. I continued to tell myself these things, until maybe, just maybe, I was partially convinced, myself.

“Spencer!?” a voice screamed my name. “Mike! I have to go back in there… she could be in there! And Vic, too!”

I whipped my head around in alarm. Jaime. Standing ten feet from the house next to Mike and Tony, who were holding him back.

“Don’t be an idiot, Jaime! You’re covered in oil! You’ll burn alive!” Tony yelled.

“Guys!” I screamed for their attention. How did they not see us out here?

They didn’t turn around, though. Maybe I wasn’t loud enough.

“Jaime! Tony! Mike!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. They still didn’t even blink.

What the fuck.

“I'll go!” I heard Tony tell Jaime.

“No!” Jaime protested. Don’t be an idiot, Jaime…

“For the love of God! The fire department is here… let them go!” Mike yelled. I was glad he could slap some sense into Tony and Jaime. Especially Jaime.

Almost immediately after he said that, firemen appeared. I could barely think. My mind still felt clouded with smoke. My hand still pressed against Vic’s neck, but something didn’t feel right…

Why the fuck couldn’t Tony or Mike or Jaime hear me? What were they still looking for?

Moments later, a fireman reappeared from the burning structure, a body swung over his shoulder.

I looked down on myself, and then back to the person in the fireman’s arms.

Well, shit. That girl looked a lot like me.

I watched as a second fireman appeared, this time desperately holding a terribly beaten and lifeless figure… Vic.

Oh.

Notes