My teachers lover (kellic)

How could i feel this way? Knowing that my mother hated my guts. Knowing that it wasn't my fault but knowing that it totally was. I was too high to notice. The drugs filled my body, wanting to escape with every breath I took. I tried to stay awake and stay away from my feelings. They didn't need me, I don't need them. I tried to hard to be the perfect son, but in reality I was far from it.
Melanie Martinez played throughout my head. As I stumbled around looking for something to do. Something to help me feel better. The balcony upstairs yelled my name asking if I wanted to do something fun. I ran up the stairs, and into the balcony, sitting on the floor. I thought about everything that had happened. The tears wouldn't stop coming. The more I sat here, the more i felt I had to jump. Like if I didn't i would just feel worst. But at the same time, i felt like I couldn't. What about Vic? Did he even love me?
How would he feel if I jumped. Ended it all. Left him. Would he feel the slitest pain? Would he get over it? I don't know.
He seemed to care for me, i just don't know. I heard the door open and close. I didn't make an attempt to stand up, just hugged my body closer. I sniffled and looked around. I felt on cloud 9. Wishing to go higher by the minute. I knew I couldn't though. I couldn't leave this world. But still I hoped to float above the clouds. But I was stuck here.
"Kellin?" Vic asked from behind me. I didn't turn around, I just stayed where I was. "Yes?" I gulped. "Are you okay?" He asked. What type of question was that? How am i supposed to answer that.
HE sighed and sat next to me. "Please talk to me," he begged. I shook my head and looked down. I didn't want to give him anything. I didn't want to let him in. If I did he would just hurt me. He would laugh in my face and point. Just luke everyone else. Everyone else that didn't care for me and never would. So I was stuck here in my thoughts.
I just wanted it to be over.

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