Running

I could feel Mike’s eyes burning into me as I laid motionless next to him. Neither one of us had said a word to each other, and it had already been at least ten hours since he opened his eyes and looked at me. Vic sat next to his brother’s bed, Tony, Cam and Casey all by his side. Mike would talk to them if they asked him a question, but his eyes still stayed on me. Visiting hours lasted for one more hour, then they would have to be out of here and it could be completely silent again. Somehow I had managed to talk the nurse into letting me stay with Mike while he was on suicide watch so that I wouldn’t have to leave his side.

I could feel hostility radiating off of Cam and Casey whenever they looked in my direction. I knew they were going to blame me for this. I somewhat blamed myself for this, but for the most part I did not. Yes, I knew that Mike had a breaking point and this shit could always end up happening, but also I knew that his psychiatric issues are something that I cannot control or change as much as I wish I could.

I stayed awake for most of the time Mike slept this morning. I laid next to him trying to wrap my head around the whole situation. At first, I was extremely upset and just wanted to grab him and smother him with hugs and kisses and comfort him. But the more I stayed silent and thought about everything, the more I wanted to strangle him and smack him across the face as hard as I possibly could. That was why I hadn’t said a single word since he opened his eyes. He could be the first one to say something, not me… not me ever.

I pushed my thoughts to the back of my mind and listened to the conversation that was going on in front of me. Cam was pulling every cliche thing he could say out of his ass trying to make the situation better. Tony was just silent and staring at me. Vic was just silent and staring at me. Casey was silent and staring at me. Mike was staring at me. Why the hell was everyone looking at me?

“Your nose is bleeding,” Mike said softly with a faint smile, as if he had just read my mind. He readjusted himself so that he could reach up and wipe it with his hand, dark red blood sitting on his fingers.

Anyone else would have probably gotten disgusted that their boyfriend had just wiped their bloody nose with his hand, but that wasn’t the case for me. Something triggered something inside of me and I no longer wanted to hit him upside the head with a cement block. My eyes began to tear up and I smiled at him before pressing my lips to his roughly, not caring about anyone who could see. Mike’s right hand grabbed onto the small of my back and pulled me closer to him as he opened his mouth and licked over my lips with his tongue. I instantly opened my mouth and granted him access to any corner of it that he wanted.


After what felt like hours I pulled away from his face, gasping for air. Of course I managed to get my gross nose blood all over the two of us, but that didn’t stop Mike from grabbing my chin and pulling my face to his one last time for another small peck on the lips.

“Here you sick fucks,” Vic muttered from beside me. He was holding two wet paper towels in his hands. “Mike looks like he just ate you out on your period.”

I grabbed the paper towels from him and suppressed the gag that had risen in my throat. I wiped all of the blood off of Mike’s face and then my own. The guys announced that they were going to leave so that we could have alone time. I guess Vic had mentioned to them that neither Mike nor I had said a word to each other until now. They all said their goodbyes then walked out the door, leaving just the two of us and the beeping heart monitor in the room.

I looked at Mike and let out a sigh, “Don’t you dare try to leave me ever again. You do this one more time and I swear to god I will either kill you myself or I’ll piss on your fucking grave. I’m not kidding.”

Mike stifled a laugh, “I was waiting for this.”

“I’m not done,” I put my hand over his mouth. “No more of this stupidity. You’re getting over this bullshit. You’re eighteen years old, Mike. It’s time to stop. Only you can make yourself stop. I can’t do anything about it but sit by your side and be supportive. You need to control yourself and end this chapter of your life because this is fucking insane. Do you understand?” He nodded and I smiled, “Good. Now that I am done being mean. I’m so fucking happy you’re okay and I love you so much don’t you ever scare me like that again. I didn’t know what the hell I was going to do if you weren’t okay.” I threw my arms around his shoulders and let tears fall from my eyes, “I love you. I love you. I love you.”

“I love you too, baby,” Mike sighed and rubbed my back. “I’m sorry for all of this. I just lost control. I’ll get clean for you, for us.”

“No, Mikey, get clean for yourself. Not us, not me. For you and only you,” I nuzzled my face into his chest. “At the end of the day it’s your body and your health and your life. Get better for yourself.”

He pressed a kiss to the top of my head, “Yes, Cassandra. Can we…”

Mike got cut off by a nurse, “I’m just coming in to check on you, Mike,” she said softly, “and change your bandages.”

I grunted and rolled off from Mike and onto my side so that she could get to his arm.

“Is there any way you can stand up so that I can reach him better?” She asked me with a fake smile.

“No,” I replied flatly while continuing to lay next to Mike.

“It would make this task a lot easier,” she said with an even more pressed smile.

“I don’t care,” I shrugged. I heard Mike laugh quietly beside me as the nurse shook her head while Mike rested his arm on my stomach to give her access to it.

I hadn’t seen Mike’s cuts and quite honestly, I didn’t want to. His wrist and portion of his forearm were already covered in scars, and now had multiple long, deep cuts sitting there as well. My breath caught in my throat as she undid the bandage completely, showing a vertical slice going up his wrist, right next to a vein. I closed my eyes and licked over my lips, trying to control myself from breaking down again. This was all too real. Way too real.

I felt Mike twitch and heard him wince in pain, probably while she was cleaning them. A few moments later the nurse spoke once again, “Alright, Mike. You’re good for the night. Get some rest and you should be able to get out tomorrow afternoon.”

I opened my eyes and sighed deeply, staring up at the ceiling. I slowly closed my eyes and let out a long, deep breath.

“Cassie, I…” Mike began to plead and grabbed my hand.

“I don’t want to talk about this right now,” I opened my eyes and swallowed. “Let’s get some sleep, okay?”


I woke up around one in the morning to Mike sleeping peacefully beside me. He was on his back with his left hand still holding onto my right wrist loosely. His mouth was slightly open, quiet snores sneaking out of it here and there. His bottom lip was chapped, but that lip ring in the middle still shined in the moonlight coming in through the door. The thing that really sucked about Mike being on suicide watch was that we couldn’t keep his curtain pulled all the way closed. Light from the hallway still shined through the doorway pretty bright, and lit up a good portion of the room. Nurses would walk up and down the hallway once an hour, and sometimes peek their heads in the room to make sure “all was fine”.

Mike stirred from beside me, his dark eyes shutting tight. His fingers crawled down and intertwined with mine and I gave his hand a small squeeze. His eyes opened and he turned his head to look at me. He licked over his bottom lip then smiled, “Why are you awake?”

“Not sure,” I leaned forward and pecked his lips. “I woke up and now it’s hard to fall back asleep because of the light.”

“Pull the curtain closed if you can’t sleep. I don’t care what they say,” Mike laughed. “It’s not like I’m going to kill myself with you sleeping next to me.”

I let go of his hand and shot him a dirty look before getting off of the hospital bed and pulling the curtain around the end of his bed to block the light. I crawled back up and Mike pulled me into his arms as best as he could. His right arm lied gently on my back, his hand resting on my butt. His left arm was wrapped underneath of me, his hand rubbing underneath my shirt. My head rested on his chest, my arms up and wrapped around his neck. His chin was resting on the top of my head. It wasn’t exactly the most comfortable position, but I was just happy to be in his arms.

“Baby,” Mike said in a whisper, seeing if I was awake or not.

“Yeah,” I replied, nuzzling my face into his shirt.

“If I get out tomorrow can we go see your dad? I want to talk to him about all of this and see what he has to say. If there’s anything he can tell me.”

I yawned, “Of course. If you want, I can let you two talk about it alone. I can drop you off and grab us all something to eat while you talk to him… Only if you want, of course.”

“I’d really like that,” Mike said, probably smiling.

“Are you smiling, you goof?” I laughed.

“What’s it to ya?” he replied, obviously smiling.

I rolled my eyes, “You’re such a dork.”

“Go to sleep,” he laughed and patted my backside with his hand.

“No,” I whined. “I wanna make love.”

“Cass,” Mike groaned as I sat up, placing my butt on his groin area. “What if we get caught?”

I shook my head and looked at him like he was stupid, “Michael Christopher, we had sex at a zoo and didn’t get caught but you’re worried about a hospital? It’s not like we’re going to get arrested for indecent exposure.”

“What about my IV?” He raised an eyebrow while holding up his right arm.

“I’ll be on top,” I smirked, slipping my fingers into the waistband of his boxers.

He chuckled as I began to pull them down, “You’re being bad. We can’t do this.”

“Shut the fuck up,” I grumbled. “I just almost lost you to the god damn Grim Reaper. If I want to have sex with you I’m going to have sex with you.”

“Was that your nice way of saying that either I’m going to agree to this or get raped?”

“Maybe,” I smirked and pulled my shorts down past my knees. I ran my hand over his manhood, “This isn’t rape when your dick is this fucking hard.”

“I thought you wanted to make love, but instead you’re talking dirty,” Mike laughed quietly.

“Shut up,” I flashed my eyes up at him as I pushed my underwear to the side and lined my entrance up with his tip. I placed one hand on the bottom of his shaft and another on his shoulder, then sunk my teeth into my bottom lip and slowly lowered myself.

Right as a whimper was about to leave my lips, Mike’s left hand slapped onto my mouth and held it tightly. He sucked in a sharp breath and squeezed his eyes closed once he was completely inside me. I placed my other hand on his right shoulder and slowly rocked my hips against his.


Mike and I made love for what felt like four hours. He had two orgasms and I had three. It hadn’t passed either one of our minds that we didn’t use a condom, but it didn’t matter. At this point I didn’t care and neither did he. All I cared about was that Mike was here with me now, watching the sun come up through the window of this stupid hospital room, with his arms around me. I couldn’t wait for this afternoon. I couldn’t wait for him to get out of this place. I couldn’t wait for him to talk to my dad. And most of all, I couldn’t wait to just put this behind us as part of the past and move on from it to cleaner, healthier, and happier days.

I pressed a kiss to his collar bone and let out a yawn, then snuggled closer to him, wrapping my left arm tightly around his torso. “Baby, we need to get some sleep before your brother gets here,” I yawned again.

“Fuck,” he muttered. “My parents come home today, Cass… I wonder if Vic told them.”

“I’m sure the hospital called and they’ll be here with him in the morning. Get some sleep, Mikey. Don’t worry about that right now.”

“I love you,” he whispered and rubbed his cheek against my head.

“I love you, too, more than you could ever imagine,” I smiled.

Notes

Yes, I know. It's been forever and a year since I updated.
Officially done with this semester so I can update.

Not sure when the next will be - but hopefully within the next week.
But you all know what that means when I say that... could be like 3 days or 3 months.

Thank you to everyone who has stuck by this story from the beginning and put up with my shitty updates.

I love you all, and can't wait for your feedback.
See you at the next update <3 xoxo