or some reason, today, my boss knew better than to make snarky comments about my ragged appearance. I lacked the energy and will to give her attitude back, anyway, so we mutually ignored each other.

I could still hear Drew Sanders voice ring in my ears as I stacked CD’s. (Shit, was there anything else to do at this place?) Misery, my dear, you are miserable…

Yes. I was miserable; it didn’t take a psychotic, serial stalker to tell me that I was spiraling out of control. But what did he want from me? And why did he haunt me when I finally felt happy for once? Why did he have to hurt the ones I grew to love?

I tried to push him from my mind, but it was nearly impossible. Behind every shelf, there he was. Around the corner, camouflaged into a wall, although he knew I could see him. It has been several years since I’ve seen him around, a statistic equivalent to the time period in which I denied human relationships. But the moment I stepped out of my comfort zone, the moment I slightly broke out of my shell, he was back. He was everywhere, and he was worse than ever. There had to be a law against this… I could easily report him, right? Then why don’t you? I asked myself. It was a valid question; what was keeping me from reporting him?

I went rigid when somebody tapped me on the shoulder. “Hi, again,” he said. “Sorry if I scared you,” it was Jaime. Damn it, why couldn’t he just take a hint and leave?

“What do you want?” I asked harshly. For some reason, I immediately felt guilty. It overwhelmed me.
Either path I took, there would be pain; I could be a bitch and make everyone around me hate me, or I could be nice, happy, and social, but ultimately make everyone around me dead. Your choice, Spencer.

“Damn, are you okay?” he asked.

“That’s none of your concern,” I muttered. Well, I guess it turned out that it was easier to choose the first option before I got any closer.

“You look really sick,” he said anyway.

“Will you please just leave me alone?” I barked. I imagined a crazed facial expression spread across my face. A crazed, unrecognizable, foreign, terrifying expression…

The familiar twinkle that burned like a star in his eyes went out like a light. I felt immediately terrible; what a beautiful and happy person, and I had to take away that spark.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, but even though I was sorry and regretted it, I turned away again anyway. It was one thing to hurt his feelings, but a whole other thing to hurt him physically; my nightmare was enough warning for me. I had to keep my distance.

I wondered why he kept coming back to me, though, why he kept trying to talk to me. Nobody had ever done that before, which was why I felt especially awful about turning away from him. Something felt right, something clicked, even though I hardly knew him. I had this foreign fuzziness in the pit of my stomach. No matter how right being around him felt, I knew it was wrong.

"You're truly a mystery. And I don't know why, but it draws me in," he said quietly. Me? Idraw him in?

"That's a dangerous thing, Jaime Preciado. If you get too close to the fire you may burn," I said ominously, turning back so I could look him in the eyes. I tried to send him warnings with flickering eyes, and then I turned away yet again.


"I hope you're happy," I said lowly to myself. No, not to myself. To Drew Sanders. I knew he was lurking somewhere, I knew he was watching my every move, I knew he was listening to my every word. Hell, he was probably listening to my every thought.

"I am only happy when you are not," I heard him whisper through the walls. I shivered abruptly, leaning on to a shelf for support. I wiped the sweat that was forming on my forehead with the back of my hands.

If only I had the resources to stop his violence. If only I had the power to keep him away. Then I could be happy, then I could make him the miserable one...

But he was too strong, and I was so weak...



"Are you okay?" I voice that seemed thousands of miles away called out to me.

I opened my eyes and sat up, immediately getting a head rush. "What? What happened? Where am I?" I began to panic.

"You fainted," Jaime said. I felt something cool on my face. I reached up and touched it; it was a damp rag. He was taking care of me... Nobody ever took care of me. "You have a high fever," he added.

"Why do you care?" I mumbled. He shrugged his shoulders.

"Well what did you want me to do? Leave you on the ground unconscious? Your boss wasn't going to do anything about it."

I sighed. "I guess not," I conceded. "Thanks anyway," I said, standing up. I had to get out of here. Wherever "here" was.

"I don't think you should stand up, yet," he warned. At his words I suddenly felt dizzy, and I grabbed the wall for support. "At least let me help you until you feel better, then I'll be out of your way," he added, putting a hand on my arm. I shivered, but not out of fear. He was comforting me. Why did I deserve his comfort? Couldn't he see that I only hurt people who were nice to me?

"Come on," he continued, helping me lay back down.

"Where are we?" I asked again.

"Back lounge of the tour bus," he said quietly. "We had another signing today, you probably didn't notice," he added.

"Oh," I said. "Where are your friends?" I asked.

"They're in the front," he nodded over to the front lounge.

After a few moments of being conscious, I was already feeling better. "I think I can sit up now," I said. He helped me up slowly, and I couldn't help but be gracious for him.

I also couldn't help but stare at his face. His eyes were full of concern. He noticed my gaze and smiled, his dimples magically appearing and his eyes twinkling.

"You're pretty," I said accidentally. I blushed, but he laughed.

"So are you," he laughed again, and something in my chest wrenched when I watched him smile. He just looked so damn happy.

I sat quiet for a moment, feeling awkward. I didn’t know what to say.

“I should probably go,” I said, rising. I tried to avoid the sadness that swept over Jaime’s face. But why did he care so much? Why couldn’t he just let it go? It wasn’t like he knew me, anyway.

“What are you running from?” he asked carefully. I shuddered. If only he could know that Iwas actually running from something.

But then I paused, looking around. Drew Sanders was not around. Would he ever bother me when I was with somebody else? Now that I thought about it, when did he ever bother me in the daytime when I was with somebody else?

Never. It was always at night. I always saw him at night. During the daytime, it was just my imagination, my brain, running on almost no hours of sleep, creating illusions.

Maybe I didn’t have to run away from him, after all. He wouldn’t bother Jaime or his friends if I wasn't there with them, right? As long as I was by myself at night, they would be safe. He could torture me at night, as long as I’m happy in the day. God Damn it, I couldn’t live on the run any more. I couldn’t live my life everyday not living. And here Jaime was, giving me an opportunity to live.

“Fuck you!” I said loudly, forgetting that I was in Jaime’s presence.

“Excuse me?” he jolted back, alarmed.

“Uh, oops, I, uh, I didn’t mean to say that out loud,” I stammered. I meant to think that, but I had so much passion and anger towards Drew Sanders that I wanted to scream it at the top of my lungs so he could hear me.

Jaime raised an eyebrow at me. “What did you mean to say?” he asked, skeptical.

“That wasn’t directed to you,” I assured. “It was directed to… to myself. A big, giant “fuck you” to the bitch inside of me,” I smiled. He seemed to have bought it, and he smiled back.

“So, what are you running from, then?” he asked again.

“Nothing,” I smiled. I smiled. “Nothing, anymore.”

~

“I’m very glad you had a sudden change in heart, but I do wonder why,” Jaime asked after I decided to hang out with him and his band for the remainder of the day.

I shrugged my shoulders. “I guess I subconsciously knew that you wouldn’t stop bothering me until I gave in,” I smirked. He rolled his eyes.

“Jaime has that effect on people. He get’s to be annoying, so if he ever becomes too much of a problem for you, don’t be afraid to tell me,” Vic said gravely as Jaime punched him in the arm.

I enjoyed watching the four friends interact with each other. They were so cute and goofy together. They were more than best friends, they were brothers.

I couldn’t help but be jealous, and I couldn’t help but crave that unfamiliar bond for myself, too.

Jaime sat next to me on a lounge couch while we played Fifa Soccer, periodically checking my temperature, which was slowly going down. The afternoon went by in a blur; all I could remember was laughing and talking and joy. If it was joy, at least, because I didn’t necessarily know what joy was. Well, I hadn’t thought of Drew Sanders and his wrath once, so I would call that some form of joy.

But then I noticed the sun go down and knew that it was time for me to go home.

“How did you get here?” Jaime asked, slightly biting his lip.

“I drove myself,” I said, dangling my car keys in his face.

“What a shame,” he commented.

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, like you were going to drive that big bus to my apartment complex,” I mock-scoffed. He shrugged his shoulders.

“Well, thanks for sticking around with our nonsense, today, Spencer,” Jaime smiled.

“Thanks for making me feel better,” I said. He assumed I was referring to my getting sick, but I was referring to a little bit more than that.

“Anytime. And I learned more about you, too,” he said.

“Yeah? What’s that?”

“I’ll tell you another time,” he winked.

“An excuse to see me again? You’re smooth, Preciado,” I let a small giggle escape from my lips.

“Someone’s a tad cocky,” he tried to suppress a smile.

“Someone’s blushing,” I teased.

He sighed in defeat.

“Bye, Jaime,” I said. “You know where I’ll be,” I said, referring to my daily job at the record shop. He smiled broadly, and, this time, I couldn’t contain my hands from poking his dimples. “Goodnight,” I whispered.

“Goodnight,” he whispered back. I turned away towards my car, hoping that I would, in fact, have a good night.




“Now, Drew, I know you’re watching me,” I murmured into the darkness as I approached my apartment. “But I’m not taking your shit, anymore. I’ll call the police if I see you again. Leave my new friends alone, okay?”

Notes

Hey! Here's chapter 5! I hope you like it:)

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