I was twenty-fucking-three, and I still had nothing going for me in my life. But who’s fault was that? Mine, of course. I was fresh out of college with a stupid degree that I couldn’t even remember the name of. I was smart, I passed high-school with flying colors, I went through the motions of college. But was I happy? No. Fuck no. I didn’t believe in this kind of life. What was the point of living in a world where all you do is school and work? When does it all amount to something? The end?

No, nothing amounts to anything in the end. Because we die. It’s inevitable.

I shunned myself for my selfishness. I toyed around with the paper clip in my hand. It was dull, but it worked. I was selfish; I wanted personal happiness, which made me selfish. I deserved this.

I dug the paper clip into the top of my arm.

My parents loved me to pieces when I was in high school. I got the best grades, I was pretty, I was well behaved. They started to hate me when I slowly declined in college, and when I graduated I avoided job interviews and didn’t answer my phone.

I was now the "bad child".

I pathetically laid in my bed all day, writing or drawing or listening to music.

I was now the slacker.

“Claire, why are you doing this to us? What happened to you?” my mom and dad would ask. I never answered out loud, only in my head. Why are you doing this to me? Nothing happened to me, I just grew up and realized how much life actually sucks.

It truly made no sense. No event in my life defined my depression; I just had a poor outlook on life.

There were only three things that made me happy: writing, art, and music.

I strived to be a published author one day. Throughout my entire life I have written countless things. And although I notoriously do nothing with my life, I do try to push my way into the writing world.

I was pushed into a packaging engineering program in college, to “brilliantly” combine my skills in art and math. But it wasn’t the art I liked. I yearned for the expressive kind, but there was no way to make a career out of that, and I rationally agreed.

The most important to me of these three things was the music. It made me feel alive. It helped me through the confusion, through the pain. I could listen to it for countless hours. I kept a notebook of original lyrics. Maybe one day I could use them in a band of my own, instead of singing covers of songs at a lame bar—a job my parent’s didn’t know about, but one that I have actually consistently kept.

I wouldn’t dare tell my parents that I sang at a bar. They, for one, wouldn't believe me. They didn’t even know that I was somewhat decent at singing.


That’s why my parents were surprised when I told them I was moving out, that I had finally saved up enough money for an apartment of my own.

“So you deal drugs now?” my mom jokingly asked, because she was too overjoyed that I had finally decided to get the fuck out of her house. She probably wouldn't have cared if I actually were selling drugs—as long as I was out of their lives.


So here I was now, alone and tired in an empty apartment, digging my arms with a goddamn paperclip because my life meant absolutely nothing.

I had a single clock in my single roomed apartment, and that clock was informing me that I was almost late for work. I numbly made my way to the bar, not sure how I got there, not sure how I made myself somewhat presentable.

“Claire,” my manager said my name.

“I’m sorry I am late!” I said in my friendly, happy, peppy voice.

“No, no, it’s not that,” she smiled. I furrowed my eyebrows.

“What is it?”

“Someone put a video of you on the internet,” her smile broadened.

“Excuse me?” I was astonished.

“It’s nothing bad! Remember last week, when you got to choose a song, and you sang “Hold On Till May” by that band, Stab the Veil?” Pierce the Veil, she meant.

“Yes, I remember,” it was my favorite song. It meant so much to me.

“Well, it got, like, so many hits,” my manager continued. She looked like she was overly excited, like she was high or something.

“And?” I pressed.

“Guess who noticed it?!” she practically yelled.

“Who?” I sighed.

“SLICE THE VEIL!” she exclaimed. I almost died of laughter.

“Slice the veil? You mean pierce the veil?”

“Oh, yes! Them! They saw it!” my jaw dropped and my laughter abruptly ended. Pierce the Veil. They saw my cover? I felt sick.

“Guess who has a ticket to San Diego?” my manager sang the words in a sing songy tune.

“Oh, my god,” I said quietly.

“YOU!” she started to dance around me, humming happy tunes. I have never seen my manager like this before.

“What does this mean?” I asked, flabbergasted.

“It means that Prick the Veil wants to meet you. Apparently they've been looking for a female vocalist, to mix things up a bit,” she smiled at me.

“Why me?” I asked to myself. I wasn’t the best singer out there. Not by a landslide. And I lacked personality.

“They said it was not only your majestic voice, but the way you carried yourself on stage, and your emotion, and your modesty, plus, YOU ARE FUCKING GORGEOUS!” I blushed immensely. My manager was definitely on some serious drugs. Or maybe I was. Because this was not real. Things like this just didn't happen.


Except when they called my work to verify my trip, I knew that, somehow, my tables had impossibly turned.

I floated to my apartment to pack; I was to leave in the morning. I called my mom and dad, telling them I was going to San Diego for a job opportunity—a lie, of course, because who knew what this was? They were happy, but that was all. They asked no questions, and I’m sure they assumed that I was going off the grid. I knew they wouldn’t look for me, because when in my life did they try to get the know the real me?

I pushed them out of my mind while pushing all sharp objects aside. Because I wasn’t going to need either of them in San Diego.

Notes

It's kind of slow at first, but I hoped you liked the beginning! I'm going to post the next chapters as soon as I finish them. Which will hopefully be veryy soon :)
Don't worry, the guys come into the story in Chapter 2! :)
I can't wait for you guys to see what I have planned for the entire story :D