What Hurts The Most

The week was nearly over and I had kept my distance for everyone. I had a lot on my mind and I had to figure things out without getting myself down. It didn't do me much good though because almost every night it seemed like I felt more and more lonely. As much as I tried to enjoy my days and try to be happy, I just wasn't and couldn't be.

I hadn't seen Tony since Saturday night and while he's been around school, he hasn't dropped by my house like he used to and that just further fueled my weird mood.
I feel like going to that concert with him was a mistake. Like it changed our weird dynamic or something.

I sat in my living room, drink on the table and homework in front of me. I heard a knock on the door and I just stared for a second, hoping it was him but upon opening the door, I was disappointed.

"Oh, hey Jaime." I said with a fake smile.

"Hey Skye, can I come in?" He asked, fidgeting with his jacket strings. I let him in and he made himself comfortable on the couch.

"So, what brings you here?" I asked and looked at him. I didn't even know he knew where I lived.

"Just wanted to see how you were. You've been looking sad all week." He said bluntly and I sighed. Clearly my fake smiles and cheerfulness in school wasn't good enough.

"I'm fine, just a lot on my mind." I said with a small smile while I toyed with the tiny strings hanging off of my sleeves.

"Did something happen last week?" He asked with an almost knowing look and I started to shake my head but I knew I could trust Jaime.

"When he dropped me off last week, after seeing him act like himself all night or I guess he was acting different from how I normally see him at least, he changed back into the person I saw every day and I guess it just bummed me out. He told me about how he feels like he has to pretend to be some douche bag and to see him pull the same smile after dropping me off that he gives to all those attention seeking bimbos, I guess it just bothered me." I said in a long winded sentence. Jaime, a little taken back from all of it, looked puzzled.

"Listen, I know I say it all the time but he does like you. Don't be discouraged by any of this."

"I just thought we were finally getting somewhere. Saturday was so nice and hanging out with you guys was a lot of fun but by the end of the night, like most nights, it just got worse." I said with a defeated sigh.

"Well, have you talked to him?" He asked and I shook my head.

"I haven't even seen him, Hime. Normally he'll stop by and have a drink and just talk but he hasn't even done that." I said, nearly crying because I felt the heartache the more we talked about it.

"Well, all I can really say is to go and talk to him. You make the moves. I know you've told him your feelings on things before, why is this any different?" He said and this time I was taken back.

"Well, this time it's different. This time it'd be me talking about my feeling for him, not about what he does." I said defensively.

"It's time to out everything. We're all sick of seeing you unhappy and him unhappy. It's time you two out your feelings for each other." He said and sat back, like he won but I don't think he realized how complicated doing all of that was.


"I'm gonna head out, I just wanted to know what was going through that stressed out pretty head of yours. So, please just go and talk it out with him. Sooner rather than later, okay?" He said sweetly and I smiled and nodded.

"I'll see you in math tomorrow." He said and I waved him a goodbye and watched him shut my front door.

He was totally right; it's about time I actually get my feelings out there. I deserve to be happy and not totally hung up on Mr. Tony Perry. If what Jaime says is true, it'll all go well, it'll be easy.

I just have to psych myself up for it.

I can do this.

Notes

Skye is finally going to own up to her feelings, will it go as smoothly as she hopes?

I have been trying to write this damn chapter for such a long time and nothing fit until tonight. I hope this is gonna get you pumped for the next one which will hopefully be up this week because /i am super pumped to write it.

See you lovely people soon! Hope all my homies on the East Coast with me stayed safe this past weekend!
Love you all! <3
~ Becca