It's gonna be okay.
It's always the same thing over and over again.
I sat on the cold, tiled bathroom floor. I can't even cry anymore. No matter what happened, all I felt was numb. I don't know what to do anymore. I twirled the cold, metal blade between my fingers and sighed. I don't know why I keep coming back to this. Slowly, I pressed the blade to my wrist and dragged it across, watching the blood quickly roll down my arm. I breathed out, pressing the blade in again, and again, and again.
I leaned my head back on the wall and closed my eyes, feeling the blood trickle down my arm and onto the floor. For a second, I felt at peace, as though everything was okay again. As though I had never met any of my old friends, as though my parents never died, as though I never began hating myself. But the feeling never lasts long.
The moment that I walk out of the bathroom, it all goes back to normal. Back to the lonliness, back to no family, back to hating myself. Until the next time I reach for the blade. I wanted it all to stop, but I could never bring to do it myself.
So, hey there. My name is Siren O'Connor. I'm 25 years old and I live in California with my closest friend, Tony Perry. He's the guitarist in a band called Pierce The Veil. They're on tour at the moment, so I've been here alone for a while now. The last date was today, which means Tony would be back home in a few hours.
I wanted to get up and clean up the bathroom, but I didn't even have the strength to bring myself to my feet. I was just tired. Tired of everything that was going on. Tired of life. I just wanted someone to come save me, but no one ever did.
I felt my breathing start to calm down, and soon, I was falling asleep in the same place, same position that I always had, ever since I could remember.
-
~Tony's POV~
"I'll see you guys tomorrow!" I laughed to my friends as they dropped me off at my place. It seemed strangely quiet. A bit too quiet for my liking. Usually, my roommate Siren would be up all night blaring Pierce The Veil songs, but today the entire house was silent. I walked up to the front door and fished the key out of my back pocket, unlocking it and stepping in. I closed the door behind me and rested my suitcases next to the wall in the front hall. All the lights had been turned off, too. Strange, I thought to myself as I flicked them on.
"Siren!" I called out. No reply. This was my que to run up the stairs as fast as I could and hurry over to the bathroom. Light shun through the crack at the bottom of the door but there was still nothing distinctive I could hear. "Siren?" I said softly as I knocked on the door. Still, no reply. Shit.
I twisted the doorhandle and opened the door with ease. And there she was. She was leant against the wall, her head down. Her left arm was covered with cuts, surrounded my dry blood. The blood had dripped onto the tiles, forming a little puddle of blood. "Siren.." I sighed as I sat down and pulled her into my lap. "Siren. Look at me." I mumbled softly.
The girl stirred awake and looked up at me with swollen eyes. There was one thing I loved about her eyes: and it was that they were the lightest grey. Almost white. They were beautiful. "Did I do it again?" She sighed sadly, using her good wrist to gently rub the triedness from her eyes. "Yeah..." I nodded, pulling her closer in, "You scared me again"
"I-I'm sorry." She looked down at her wrist while I brushed some hair out of her eyes. "It's okay. It's gonna be okay." I promised, kissing her temple gently. "You always say that." She stated, a frown appearing on her lips. "I always say that, because I believe that it will." I told her, standing up and picking Siren up bridal-style, carrying her down the stairs and into the kitchen.
I sat her down on the counter and pulled a first aid kid out of the cupboard. I cleaned up her wrist and bandaged it tightly. "Do I even want to draw the butterfly?" I smiled. "That would be pointless." Siren giggled. I put the first aid kit away and stared at Siren for a second. "Thanks Tony." She smiled sweetly, looking down at her hands. "Don't worry about it." I replied, wrapping my arms around her waist to hug her.
"It's gonna be okay. I promise." I whispered sternly yet softly into her ear.
"If you say it is." She smiled.
I leaned my head back on the wall and closed my eyes, feeling the blood trickle down my arm and onto the floor. For a second, I felt at peace, as though everything was okay again. As though I had never met any of my old friends, as though my parents never died, as though I never began hating myself. But the feeling never lasts long.
The moment that I walk out of the bathroom, it all goes back to normal. Back to the lonliness, back to no family, back to hating myself. Until the next time I reach for the blade. I wanted it all to stop, but I could never bring to do it myself.
So, hey there. My name is Siren O'Connor. I'm 25 years old and I live in California with my closest friend, Tony Perry. He's the guitarist in a band called Pierce The Veil. They're on tour at the moment, so I've been here alone for a while now. The last date was today, which means Tony would be back home in a few hours.
I wanted to get up and clean up the bathroom, but I didn't even have the strength to bring myself to my feet. I was just tired. Tired of everything that was going on. Tired of life. I just wanted someone to come save me, but no one ever did.
I felt my breathing start to calm down, and soon, I was falling asleep in the same place, same position that I always had, ever since I could remember.
-
~Tony's POV~
"I'll see you guys tomorrow!" I laughed to my friends as they dropped me off at my place. It seemed strangely quiet. A bit too quiet for my liking. Usually, my roommate Siren would be up all night blaring Pierce The Veil songs, but today the entire house was silent. I walked up to the front door and fished the key out of my back pocket, unlocking it and stepping in. I closed the door behind me and rested my suitcases next to the wall in the front hall. All the lights had been turned off, too. Strange, I thought to myself as I flicked them on.
"Siren!" I called out. No reply. This was my que to run up the stairs as fast as I could and hurry over to the bathroom. Light shun through the crack at the bottom of the door but there was still nothing distinctive I could hear. "Siren?" I said softly as I knocked on the door. Still, no reply. Shit.
I twisted the doorhandle and opened the door with ease. And there she was. She was leant against the wall, her head down. Her left arm was covered with cuts, surrounded my dry blood. The blood had dripped onto the tiles, forming a little puddle of blood. "Siren.." I sighed as I sat down and pulled her into my lap. "Siren. Look at me." I mumbled softly.
The girl stirred awake and looked up at me with swollen eyes. There was one thing I loved about her eyes: and it was that they were the lightest grey. Almost white. They were beautiful. "Did I do it again?" She sighed sadly, using her good wrist to gently rub the triedness from her eyes. "Yeah..." I nodded, pulling her closer in, "You scared me again"
"I-I'm sorry." She looked down at her wrist while I brushed some hair out of her eyes. "It's okay. It's gonna be okay." I promised, kissing her temple gently. "You always say that." She stated, a frown appearing on her lips. "I always say that, because I believe that it will." I told her, standing up and picking Siren up bridal-style, carrying her down the stairs and into the kitchen.
I sat her down on the counter and pulled a first aid kid out of the cupboard. I cleaned up her wrist and bandaged it tightly. "Do I even want to draw the butterfly?" I smiled. "That would be pointless." Siren giggled. I put the first aid kit away and stared at Siren for a second. "Thanks Tony." She smiled sweetly, looking down at her hands. "Don't worry about it." I replied, wrapping my arms around her waist to hug her.
"It's gonna be okay. I promise." I whispered sternly yet softly into her ear.
"If you say it is." She smiled.
please update!!!!!!!!!!!!
12/29/13