scream at the drunken moon

God I love my sister just as you thought life could only get worse she spun it around somehow fixing everything in a few swift moves shes a rather efficient woman and I am a very luck girl to have someone like her with me. Its us against the world. Honestly I never thought about going back to school just because my father didn’t kill me doesn’t mean that not one out of the many bullies I have wont , pretty much the whole school hates me and there was frequent bashings both at home and at school I couldn’t escape the physical or mental abuse, well there was one way and that was to cut as deep as I could while blasting music it released all the pain.

After dinner I go upstairs into my room and put my ipod on shuffle blasting hell above as loud as I could I pick up my guitar and start playing along and izzy came in singing vics parts

“THIS IS A WASTE LAND MY ONLY RETREAT WITH HEAVEN ABOVE YOU THERES HELL OVER ME!” we sing together like we use to its always fun jamming with her no matter what mood I’m in. after the song we both collapsed on my bed staring at the celing then she got up and left turning my music down a bit walked over to my door and wished me goodnight

When izzy left the room I opened the window and climbed into the tree outside my window and onto the roof pierce the veil still playing softly in the background I lay on the roof looking at the stars they all shine so bright it was relaxing laying up there looking at the stars listening to wonderless in the background while puffing on a cigarette all your worries just slip to the back of your mind there is no annoying voices in your head telling you horrible things nothing just silence its perfect.

As I started to feel drowsy I decided it was time to come down form the roof and go to bed not that I would get much sleep anyway with all the bullying and trauma at home I developed night terrors at the age of 12 it was always flash backs or dreams that all the demons and monsters would come after me and izzy and I would usually wake up as soon as they got izzy I never got to see what happened after they got her I didn’t want to I would always wake up in a cold sweat crying and having a panic attack the more I didn’t sleep the darker my eyes got the more makeup I had to apply I rarely ate as well izzy hated it but it was what monster wanted he liked me being fragile and sick.


As I crawl into bed I see his face pop into my mind it makes me shudder every time as I close my eyes I drift off into the darkness which I let consume me hoping that I would just have a good sleep praying the night terrors would let me have at least a few hours sleep. It goes dark.

Notes

sorry this ones short