Disenchanted Lullabye

I needed her. She was the only thing that had kept me sane. I know that I fucked up and made too many mistakes but I realize now that she isn't here, I am nothing more than a piece of shit pothead. I ruined the one good thing I had going in my life.

I knew where she had gone. The one place she knew she could make a living and have a decent chance at making it big. Even with all of her anxiety and depression, she still shined brighter than a mirror in the sun. When she was in her element, nothing could stop her from being a bubbly, outspoken firecracker. She was unpredictable at times but no matter what happened, she had no problem showing her true emotions.

She was the only girl that put up with me and even though I put her through so much shit, she still motivated me to be a better person and stuck by my side.

Only now do I realize that I was the one who messed up, not her. She could live without some asshole like me but I couldn't live without a wonderful human being like her.
I had to go to her. She wasn't going to hear me out through the phone or through texts. I needed her back in my life. I was determined to get her back even if it killed me.

Nobody could calm her down like I could. Nobody would understand if she had a sudden outburst. No one would be able to ease her mind. She probably hasn't even told anyone, if she has anyone to tell.

She's been away for three months; she must've made some friends by now. I doubt she has told them though. She's far too embarrassed when it comes to her own issues and her past to say anything.

She will be mine again.

~Three days later~

I had booked a flight out to San Diego to find her. I had a hotel room all set for the week and I would search for her longer if I don't find her by that week's end. She is mine and I would kill us both if that meant we could be together again.

I had landed in LAX and got a cab to drive the two hours to my hotel and the whole time, I was amazed at how beautiful it was here. I could see why Miranda always wanted to live here.

"Here we are. Enjoy your stay in California." the cab driver said with a smile as I paid him.

"Have a good day." I said as I walked away and into my hotel to check in.

~A Few Days Later~

I hadn't seen her around yet. I checked a lot of local venues around here. I can only imagine that if she were to be somewhere, it would be her workplace. She was a workaholic when she wanted to be.

I could have sworn I had seen her go into a huge building. It looked like a venue, she couldn't have made it that quickly. She preferred small venues because of the ambiance. No way.

It was her! She changed her hair back to her natural color, she used to hair brilliant red hair now it was back to her dirty blonde color. She looked great, happy even. California did her pale figure some good.

I'll follow her and see where she goes now that I know where she works. I'll have to be cautious though.

I don't think she saw me all day. She had stopped at a house and judging by the amount of cars that were parked out front, it wasn't hers. I waited round for a few hours until she came back out, a smile plastered on her face as she got into her car. I wonder who was in there that made her light up like that. I saved the location in my GPS.

I followed her to this mediocre looking apartment complex close to the city. This must be where she lives now. I watched as she locked her car and walked into the building. I smirked to myself thinking about how surprised she would be to see me.


Tomorrow. Tomorrow I'll come here early to catch her before she goes out. I'll explain everything and get her back then. I don't want to hurt her more but I don't know what I'd do if she walked away again.


I headed back to my hotel and relaxed. I planned everything out so I would be set for the morning and then fell asleep with an alarm set to wake me up nice and early.
Only one more night without the love of my life.

She will be mine again by the afternoon.

Notes

Sorry for the lateness of this but I hope this makes it up a little bc of the impending drama!
Expect another one up tomorrow/saturday!

Have you guys started school yet? I know some have. How was your first day? Is this year your last?

Hope you all are doing ok!
Love you<3
~Becca xx c;