A War in My Head

I watched him smile. I watched it everyday, and without fail it gave me butterflies. Nothing else in this world has ever made me feel so whole. I’m generally a happy person, usually positive. But being around Vic made everything seem brand new. The only problem is that everytime Taylor is brought up he finds some new way to break her down. And I don’t blame him. I know he dislikes her so much, but I’m still friends with her. Sorta.

“Lynn, where have you been?” Taylor asked me. I looked up from my books. I was currently in the library studying for my exams in about two months time.

“I’m studying” I pointed to my books. “I’m surprised you even found me here, how did you know where the library is” I laughed. She rolled her eyes and sat down across from me.

“It was urgent, I asked someone” She shrugged. I looked back down at my work and began writing again. “Hey I need to speak to you” Taylor spoke to me with some sort of authority.
I looked up at her again slowly. “This isn’t the time nor the place” I looked around me. Everyone in the library was beginning to get annoyed by Taylors' loud voice.

“Please talk to me at lunch then” She told me. I thought for a second then nodded. She stood up and walked out of the library, I heard someone whisper ‘Thank God’ Once she left. It made me laugh, because I now have no delusions that anyone actually likes her.

I got down to work again when a folded piece of paper was placed in front of me. I picked it up and opened it. ‘UR HOT’ was scribbled awfully on the paper. I looked up and seen Vic standing with a goofy grin on his face. I couldn’t help but laugh at how dorky he was.

He sat down where Taylor had previously been sitting. “Hello love” He grinned, putting on the worst English accent I’ve ever heard.

“You don’t study, what are you doing here?” I cocked my head to the side. He just leaned forward with an excited look on his face.

“I got kicked outta Biology” He shrugged. I raised an eyebrow.

“Why?” He thought for a second. Maybe he was unsure about telling me why.

“It was technically Jaimes' fault. Okay this is totally immature so don’t judge me but we are going back over reproduction and Jaime kept making really bad dick jokes. I couldn’t help but laugh, y’know I’m easy to make laugh. So our teacher thought it was me making the jokes and she kicked me out. I hope it doesn’t fuck up me going to college” He sighed.

“You’re such a dork” I shook my head, laughing lightly. He tilted his head to the side and nodded.

“Yeah I kinda am but if that does it for you then I’m all for it” He winked.

“Sorry to break it to you Vic but I’m actually here to study and pass my exams. Unlike you I haven’t actually got into University yet” I breathed out, my mom found out about me not applying to University. So she told my guidence teacher that she wasn’t happy with it, so I’ve been forced to apply for San Diego State. Funnily enough the university that Vic got into. Maybe it’s fate.

“Sorry, I’ll see you at lunch” He stuck his tongue out at me and jumped off his chair, almost racing out of the library. I don’t know why but since we got together he seemed so much happier. No one really knew yet. Tony, Mike and Jaime were the only ones. Harley didn’t know.
All she knew was that Vic didn’t wanna hook up anymore, she wasn’t happy with that though.

I’m still going to prom with Tony though. Jaime and Vic are somehow going together, they think it’s going to make some political statement. Even though they’re not gay. Mike is somehow gatecrashing prom. He isn’t even in our year but somehow he wants to go because we’re all going.

After another 15 minutes of studying the bell for lunch went off, indicating that I was free. A part of me was scared because Taylor wanted to chat and I really ain’t in the mood to face her. I walked out onto the bleachers where we used to meet up at lunch. I looked over to the tree where my friends and boyfriend were sitting, even though it was only for a small time it felt like I was being ripped away from them. It brought back memories from when I was permanently stuck over here.

“What’s up bitch” Taylor jumped down next to me. I looked at her and smiled.
“Taylor” I said as nicely as I could.

“So I wanted to apologise for what happened at your gig the other week there” She looked apologetic. I nodded, knowing full well she wasn’t sorry at all.

“I accept your apology” I lied. I definitely don’t accept any apology she makes.

“Thank you Lynn” She pulled me in for a hug. “I feel like we never see each other anymore. What’s up with that?” Maybe because you’re a bitch?

“I don’t know” I shrugged.

“I also heard a rumour about your Lynn, I just want you to deny it for me so I know the truth” She sounded like she was gonna go all bitchy on me.

“What rumour?” I asked. She looked over towards Vic and my friends.

“You’re dating Vic Fuentes?” She sounded disgusted with herself. I looked at her with confusion. How did she know?

“Who I’m dating isn’t really your business” I looked at her with a serious face. She furrowed her eyebrows.

“Excuse me but I’m your best friend. I thought friends shared secrets” She shook her head, annoyed with the revelation.

“No, Taylor we were best friends but you ruined that. You got your douchey friends to beat up MY boyfriend at MY concert” I said standing up and began walking down the bleacher to the stairs.

“Yeah go ahead Lynn. You always loved my scraps didn’t you” She said smugly. I spun around and looked at her.

“What?” I asked, confused at her statement.

“You heard me...” She cocked her head to the side looking at me. “In 8th grade you kissed my boyfriend only three days after we broke up” She stated.

“He kissed me” I corrected.

“Whatever you didn’t stop him” She crossed her arms across her chest.

“What’s that got to do with me dating Vic” I asked. She just smirked at me.

“Ask Fuentes yourself”She grinned at me. I began walking backwards, turning at the stairs and walking down them. Fury rose in me as I stormed across the football field. A soccer ball rolled to my feet and I kicked it off the field. Guys were shouting at me about how rude it was. I really didn’t care.

I approached my friends, anger boiling in my veins. “Vic, can I have a word with you” I said, towering over him. They all stopped laughing and he looked up at me with worry.

“S-sure” He stuttered. He stood up and followed me over to another tree that was empty. “Lynn what’s wrong?” He stared at me, unsure of what was going on.

“How well do you know Taylor? Cause you never said” I asked. He looked at his shoes and didn’t say a word.

“Not that well” He mumbled. I looked at him with confusion.

“She seems to think you know each other well” I sighed. I felt my phone buzz in my pocket, indicating that I had a text.

I pulled it out and looked at it. ‘Fuentes was innocent until I met him last summer at a party. I was so wasted and felt sorry for him so I popped his cherry. Oops. Have fun with my seconds, love Taylor.’ I read the text about three times.

“What’s wrong? Who text you?” He asked frantically.

“Fuentes was innocent until I met him last summer at a party. I was so wasted and felt sorry for him so I popped his cherry. Oops. Have fun with my seconds, love Taylor” I read out, my voice shaking. I felt like my stomach was stuck in my mouth, how could I have been so stupid to not have remembered that. She told me this before but I didn’t know who Vic was back then. I looked up at him waiting for a reply, but he didn’t have anything to say to it. “Well then, nice to know” I laughed the most fake ass laugh you’ve ever heard.

“Look I’m sorry I didn’t tell you” He grabbed my hand. I looked at him and shook my head.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I questioned, shaking his hand off my hand.

“I was scared to. How can I tell the girl I like that I lost my virginity to her best friend through pity sex?” He shook his head, cheeks flushed with embarrassment. “It’s so degrading for me. I actually shocked you didn’t know. She told everyone about that” He sighed.

“It doesn’t bother me that you’ve had sex with her, what bothers me is that you just didn’t tell me. I was under the impression that you were still a virgin” I looked at him, searching for something to feel better about.

“You know I’ve hooked up with Harley many times” He furrowed his brows. I bit my lip.
“I didn’t know that meant you slept together” I looked at my feet.

“I’m sorry if that bothers you, but it doesn’t bother me that you’re a virgin” He shrugged.

“It doesn’t bother me I just like to know” I looked up into his beautiful brown eyes. My gaze was drawn over to where Taylor was still sitting, her face was happily plastered with a smile. “Just no more lies” I pleaded.

“I’m so sorry. I’ll never lie or miss out important details again” He told me. I looked at him, feeling a lot better about it.

“I’m so sorry you had to have sex with Taylor” I laughed softly.

“Trust me it wasn’t a highlight of my life. I felt so embarrassed after it. If I could change things... If I knew I was ever going to have a chance with you, I would’ve waited” He looked away, cheeks red.

“I think that’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me” I laughed. He pulled me into him, wrapping his arms around my waist. I wrapped my arms around his neck and stared into his eyes.

“You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. Is that better?” He smirked at me. I felt my whole insides melting, the affect he has on me is strangely unbeliavable.

“You’re pretty much perfect” I whispered. He leaned in and kissed me softly on the lips.

“You too” He whispered.

Notes