A War in My Head

I woke up and it was still dark outside. A thin layer of sweat covered my forehead, making me feel disgusting. Nothing is worse than feeling sweaty in someone else's presence. I turned to see Vic peacefully sleeping next to me. His chest rising and falling rhythmically. Something about his still body made me feel really safe. Suddenly he put his arm around me and pulled me closer to him. I didn't react but he mumbled something then kissed my head.

If anything it gave me butterflies, making me feel secure and happy. Even if our friendship was a bit twisted, it still made me happy to have it.

I fell back asleep peacefully in the arms of one of the best people I know.

----

The smell of pancakes brought me out of my sleep. I opened my eyes and looked beside me, Vic was gone. I noticed a piece of paper on the pillow next to me. 'Pancakes for breakfast, I'll bring them up for you so don't leave the bed. - Vic' I smiled at how adorable he was being, honestly he should've just taken me home and let me take the fall for my own actions.

I waited until he came up, breakfast in hand. "Good morning" He smiled at me. I looked over at him and blushed, I wasn't used to this.

"Hi... I'm sorry to be a pain" I sighed, feeling totally embarrassed.

"Hey it's okay. I was actually thinking of coming over to yours today and talking to you. I felt horrible for what I said" He handed me the plate. I picked up the fork and began eating the pancakes.

"Wow these are good!" I gushed. He smiled happily because I liked them.

"How do you feel?" He asked. I looked at him and shrugged.

"Strangely I'm not hungover, I probably should be" I laughed, taking another piece of pancake and stuffing it in my mouth.

"Why did you drink so much?" He mumbled, worry plastered all over his face. I felt bad for making him feel this way.

"I don't know. I just felt like letting go, and somehow I completely lost it. If Jaime and Tony had not found me I'd probably be in hospital right now. I'm such an idiot" I shook my head, ashamed of myself.

"Do you remember much from last night?" Vic asked curiously. I looked at him with fear.

"Oh my God, did I embarrass myself?" I panicked. He laughed lightly and shook his head no.

"No you didn't embarrass yourself. Don't worry about that" He smiled. "So you don't remember anything you said to me?" He questioned.

I shook my head casually as I ate more of my pancakes. "Nah I totally spaced out. Did I say something to you?" I raised an eyebrow.

He smiled and shook his head no. "Nah" He shrugged.

"Did I come on to you?" I closed my eyes with embarrassment. He just laughed really loudly, it was a nice laugh though, contagious.

"No but I didn't know you'd even think of that huh" He winked at me.

I threw a pillow at his head, which hit him square in the face. "Don't be rude" I laughed.

"No Lynn, you didn't say or do anything that was out of the ordinary so don't worry" He smiled at me. I felt like crying with how perfect his smile was. A part of me is falling for Vic Fuentes. The rest is wants to slam my head off of a wall because I'm almost 90% sure I said something stupid to him last night. "I'm going to go in a shower then I'll drive you home" He told me.

I finished my breakfast and drank the coffee Vic brought me while Vic showered. I wasn't expecting him to be so quick. He walked back into the bedroom after 10 minutes in a pair of boxers and dripping wet hair. I couldn't help but stare at him. His skin was wet from the shower, making his body glow. Man was he hot.

"You're staring" He smirked at me. I felt my face go red as I threw the covers over my head. I heard footsteps walking closer to the bed. He ripped the covers off me and stared down at me. "Do you like what you see?" He grinned at me.

I looked at him, shocked at how forward he was being. "What are you doing?" I asked frantically. I stood up off the bed and walked over to the door. Unsure of what I was doing.

He turned to face me, smirking at me. "Why are you acting so nervous?" He laughed. I didn't know what to say.

"Maybe because I am" I mumbled. He sauntered over to me and stood about a foot away.

"Why?" He smiled at me, devilishly.

"I've never really been with anyone that isn't like... A really good friend. Let alone a dude half naked in front of me. You have all this experience with girls and stuff so you don't see the issue here but me? I don't know what the Hell I'm doing. I'm such a freak" I groaned. I could feel my cheeks flush red and my heart race.

"It's nothing to be afraid of. We're friends and you don't need to say or do anything you don't want to. You're a grown up" Vic told me. I nodded up at him and bit my lip.

Something came over me, I don't know if it's the teenage hormones or him but i lost it all. I reached up my hand and wrapped it around his neck, pulling him down to kiss him. He didn't hesitate for a second and I guess that's all that matters to me.

He pushed me against the wall, hands tangled in my hair. I bit his lip out of frustration, mainly because I knew this wouldn't go further than a simple kiss. I couldn't let it go further. But he made me want to, so much. My hands got tangled in his wet hair, pulling him into my body. I wanted to feel his touch, his hands were so rough but it felt good. He has guitar hands and that feels incredible.

He trailed kisses down to my neck, making me squirm and moan quietly. It was a new sensation but it was definitely something I could get used to. His hands were placed on my hips. He got even closer to me and I could feel how excited he was and that's where I freaked out.

"Stop" I mumbled. He didn't hear me and it freaked me out. "Stop!" I cried out. My hands pushed him away and I fled his room and house. He didn't even have a chance to stop me, before he knew it I was gone. "Lynn!" He cried after me. "LYNN!" I heard him chase me down the street.

I turned left and made it to the park, collapsing on the grass in a fit of tears. Vic eventually got me. He had an inside out shirt on and ripped skinny jeans and some beat up vans. He must've freaked out.

"Lynn what happened?" He asked, staring into his eyes, searching for something.

I didn't answer I just cried. He pulled me into his arms and I cried. "I'm so sorry" I sobbed.

"It's okay" He soothed me. I pulled back and looked at him.

"I can't do this for much longer" I wiped away tears.

"What do you mean?" He asked with fear in his eyes.

"Vic... I like you" I mumbled. I looked him straight in the eyes.

He furrowed his eyebrows. "As in like, like me?" He asked. I just nodded, unsure of my voice.

"Sorry" I mumbled.

"Lynn" He said. I looked at him with hopeful eyes. "Kiss me again" He mumbled. I looked at him with confusion. He just rolled his eyes and and leaned in. He caught my lips in his. "I like you too" He whispered against my lips.

Notes