Darling you'll be okay

Amelia's POV
Ive been 15 for a couple of weeks now, we've been on tour for the past week. Vic and Mike kept it a surprise from me. I've been feeling really down lately, I don't see the point in breathing anymore, I'm considering ending it tonight. I put my earphones in and listen to Pierce the Veil.

"if I were you I'd put that away
see you're just wasted and thinking about the past again
darling you'll be okay"

this song gets me through so much. I don't feel like I can talk to anybody anymore, not Jack or Alex . Even though they are my best friends. Not even Vic. I miss the old days where I was happy. I just wish everything would stop, I'm done with everything. The guys are out performing just now, and All Time Low are probably eating lunch.

I grab my blade and drag it across my wrist. 3 weeks clean down the drain. I slice my arm all the way up and then the same on my other arm. I cut until I feel lightheaded and then clean my arms a bit. I remember that I had eaten cereal about half an hour ago and stick my fingers down my throat.

About 1 hour later I'm still purging. What has my life become? I get up and lie in my bunk to stop feeling lightheaded. I feel the world spinning around me.

"Hey Amelia im back!" I hear Tony shout. He walks to my bunk with jack and Jaime behind him, "hey" jack says and lays in my bunk and hugs me. "Are you okay? Your really pale?" He questions. "I'm okay, just a ill dizzy" I laugh. My whole body's trembling. "Why are you shaking?"

"just cold" I reply. He gets up and comes back with noodles. "Here you go" he says. "I'm fine, I'm not hungry." I lie. He looks at me suspiciously. "Just eat some, you don't look well" he demands. He hugs me again and then stares at me shocked, "what?" I ask him. "Have you been eating?" I nod, even though it's a lie. "I can feel your ribs, this isn't healthy. Have you been starving yourself?!" He questions

"I'm just not hungry I promise." He shakes his head. "We're all really worried about you. We've noticed you've suddenly stopped eating. Why?" He asks sadly, already knowing the answer. "Are you ad
fraid of gaining weight?" I nod. "We all love you so much, I don't ever wanna loose my best friend. Please stay strong for me, and eat. You could have spoken to us, you trust us, right?" I nod.

"I'm really sorry but I have to tell Vic" he says and runs off.

Notes