Sometimes I Sit and Wonder, Sometimes I Feel like Letting Go.

Tony was off all day, and I was getting worried. I've tried calling, and texting him numerous times, but he wasn't answering. Right now I was on the brink of crying I was so worried.

So I decided I was going to his house, Because what if something bad happened and I was so worried. I told Vic where I was going, and said to call him if anything was wrong. I grabbed his car keys on my way out, and started shaking.

I got in, and started the car heading to Tony's house.After the quick drive to his house, which seemed like hours I was there. I got out and headed to the door, when I knocked Mrs. Perry opened the door and gave me a small smile.

"Are you here for Tony." She asked, and I nodded.

"He's up in his room, you can go on up there. You know which one it is right?" She asked, and I nodded again while she let me.

"Thank you Mrs. Perry." I said and smiled

"No problem honey. Also, I'm getting ready to leave. So you can stay if you want." She said, and I went on upstairs.

Once I got up there I seen his door was closed, I knocked a few times, but no answer. I checked to see if it was locked and it wasn't. I opened it quickly, and seen a something I never wanted to see. My baby crying in a corner with a blade drawn to his wrist. It took everything in me not to fall down and cry. I rushed over, took the blade from him, he looked so small and vulnerable. It broke my heart to see him doing this to himself.

"Baby, why are you doing this?" I asked, and was nearly in tears. It just made me so fucking sad that he doing this to himself. He is so perfect, in every way possible.

"B... because Ronnie said you didn't l... love me. And t... that I was a f... fat ass fag. And that I s... should kill m... myself." Tony managed to choke out. Anger rushed trough me, Ronnie fucking caused this. I'm going to kill Ronnie, if it's the last thing I do. I pulled Tony into a hug, I didn't care that he was bleeding. I just wanted to hold him.

"Tone baby, I could never hate you. I love you so much. I love everything about you from the top of your head, to the very tip of you toes. You're not fat, you're very skinny. Even if you was a little chubby I would still love you. Weight doesn't define you, neither does your looks. But you Tony, you're beautiful in everyway possible. Your looks, your personality, everything. Don't let anyone at all, tell you different." I said, and meant every single fucking word.

"You really think that about me?" Tone asked, and looked up at me.

"Yes, I do Tone. I meant every single word of it too. I love you baby." I said kissing his nose, and bringing my hands up too his face. I wiped his tears away my thumbs.

"I love you too Mikey." He said, and I smiled.

But then remembered he was bleeding. I picked him up to where his legs was around my waist, and I was holding him under the butt. When we got in the bathroom I sat him down on the sink, and rummaged around to a first aid kit. Finally I found one, it was under the sink. Once everything I needed was laid out on the counter I got to work. First was washing off the cuts, he winced every time the rag made contact with one. Once I was done with cleaning them, I kissed each and everyone, new or old. On both his arms. But finally he was all bandaged up, and good to go.

I carried him back into his room, and laid him down on the bed. Then laid beside him, wrapping my arms around his waist. I wanted to make him feel beautiful tonight, ands that's exactly what I'm going to do.

I got up, and straddled him while kissing passionately.Tony's hands ran up through my hair, and I was running my hands up and down his sides. Then moved down to his collarbones; I kissed, and nipped at them with my teeth. Making my love bites on him. I felt Tony become excited under me, and rubbed our crotches together.

I lifted up Tony's shirt, and he lifted up to let me pull it off. He was skinny, and there was raised whitish scars littering his stomach. I kissed him again.

"God, you're so beautiful. So, so beautiful " I whispered against his soft, pink lips.

I took his hands and pinned them above his head. While I scooted down, and kissed every scar on his stomach. When I came back up, I kissed him again, and let his hands go. As soon as they was free, he was tugging at my shirt. I helped him get it off, and his eyes roamed my body. But I had other plans, my hands went down and was trying to tug his pants off. Finally the task was done, and I got them off.

He got mine off too, and all that was left was our boxers. I straddled Tony again, and rubbed out crotches together. We was kissing passionately, and he was moaning slightly.

He managed to flip us over somehow. Now he was kissing me and rubbing out lower regions together. I let out a groan of pleasure, this caused him to grind a little harder. He moved down, and started nipping at my collarbones. He nipped around making his marks on me, I let out a strangled cry when he found my sweet spot.

I've never thought Tony could become like this. He's always so shy all the time, this is just so different. I like it.

I flipped us back over, kissing him again. I swiped my tongue across his bottom lip, which at first he denied. That was until I brought my hand up to his hair and gave a small tug. He let out a gasp into the kiss, and I made out tongues battle for dominance. Which I won. He was moaning into the kiss, and bucking his hips trying to get some kind of release.

Not going to lie it was hot. I pulled back, and scooted down slightly. Tony whimpered, and gave me a pleading look. I grinned, and reached into his boxers, and grabbed his member. That enticed a loud moan from him. I started stroking slowly, and Tony was letting out loud, low moans every time I grazed my thumb over the tip.

"Please do something Mikey." Tony breathed out. I chuckled, but decided okay. This was his night. So I pulled down his boxers all they way, and stroked faster. This went on for about a minutes, but I stopped because he was close.

"You have any lube?" I asked, and he shook his head no. I went to the bathroom, and found some lotion I could use. I stripped out of my boxers, and got on top of him. I opened the lotion, and spread some on my member, and my fingers.

First I put on finger into him, and his breath hitched in his throat. But then another, and started scissoring, when I finally thought he was stretched I lined myself up.

"This might hurt baby. If it does tell me to stop." He nodded, and I pushed in slowly. He pulled us together in a kiss, while I was easing myself in. When I was finally in all the way, I let him get adjusted, and then started trusting slowly. Damn, he was tight.

I was at a good pace, and Tony was a moaning, screaming mess beneath me. I had no idea he would be this vocal. Damn, it was sexy.

"Faster!" Tony screamed, and I complied and went faster. Letting out low grunts

I was so close.

"Mikey, I'm so close!" Tone yelled, and I went a little faster.

"Come for me Tony." I said in low voice. I pushed in a few more times.

"Mikey, I'm coming! Fuck! Oh fuck! Oh fuck! Oh Mikey!" He screamed, and came on our stomachs, that was enough for me to come also.

"Uhh, fuck!!" I yelled and released inside him. I rode out my high and pulled out. I got up; went to the bathroom and washcloth. Running it under the sink, then bringing back into his room. I cleaned myself, then cleaned him off.

I threw the washcloth back into the bathroom. Then went and laid beside Tony, he cuddled into me.

"I love you Tone." I said and kissed his head.

"I love you too Mikey, that was amazing." He said, and I replied with 'mhm.'

I hope Tone doesn't wake up and regret this. I don't, this was my first time with anyone. I'm glade it was with him though, it defiantly was more special since it was with Tony. We fell asleep like that in each others arms, and the bliss of what just happened.

Notes

Hey guys, so I wrote smut, and I'm not to sure about it. I might delete this chapter, and change it. I'm not really sure about the this and if I do keep this up. It will be the probably be the only I write. Anyways I hope y'all have a wonder day/night!!!