A week and a half later, Friday night, 9: 58 P.M…

It was almost ten o’clock. The last week had gone by pretty quickly. The amber alerts blared less and less. It was if the world was staring to forget about me. They hadn’t dyed my hair or given me contacts (yet) and it seemed to be pushed to the back of their minds.

Tonight, I was sitting on the couch with Ricky. All the boys were sitting in the front lounge. They were all drinking and getting hammered. I think Ryan was the worst of all. Ghost had been driving for most of today and we stopped just outside a small town in Montana. The band was scheduled for a concert in a few days. I think Sunday night was their concert day.

Ricky stroked my hair as I leaned against his shoulder. I didn’t drink. I couldn’t legally drink. At least the band understood that much. I just watched as they all downed a beer. Ryan was on his fourth one. Chris tried to slow him down but then Ryan went and passed out in his bunk.

The stars outside were crystal clear. I was missing the fourth good night in a row for stargazing. If only I had my notebook with me to document the movement of the stars. I was working on a side project as well. The Draco meteor shower was supposed to be coming up in a few weeks and I wanted to keep a record going for how well the shower was supposed to turn out. It was a decade long project.

Ricky started to doze off and I poked his side. He grinned as his eyes closed.

“I’m awake, Little One.” He murmured. I sighed and leaned into his shoulder again. Sometimes, I had to focus on the good. I might be held captive against my will. I might be beaten at some point. I might be restrained at every moment, but at least Ricky cared enough to recognize that I was human still and not just a pet.

Ryan stumbled out of his bunk after a half hour long drunken sleep. The bags under his eyes showed that he was still sleepy. I shied away as he passed by me. Chris eyed him. Balz was passing out on the couch. A beer bottle was partially spilled on the floor.

“Dude, I’m hammered.” He drunkenly giggled. Ricky tightened his grip on me.

“Ry, we know. Go sit down.” Chris told him. He rolled his eyes.

“I-I-I, s-s-saw….” He stuttered as he grinned down at me. I don’t know when it had happened, but he had his look trained on me. I saw him stumble until he leaned against the wall. He rubbed his head as if he had a headache.

“What’d you see?” Ghost chuckled. Balz hiccupped in his sleep. Ryan pointed at me. My eyes went wide.

I had a faint feeling I knew what he saw.

“I-I saw here with Rick. Orion was out of bed a week ago.” Ryan grinned like a fool and started a weird dance that went with ‘a week ago’. The bus went silent. Ricky paled even more than his makeup usually allowed.

“Rory…” Chris warned me. Ricky squeezed my shoulder.

“Rory was escaping! Rory was escaping!” Ryan began to chant. He kept chanting until he was gasping for breath and smiling like he won the Boston Marathon.

“RORY!” Chris growled. I shook my head.

“N-no, n-no! I w-wasn’t!” I refuted shakily. Then I realized.

To them, I was basically a slave. I had no opinions or chances. They wouldn’t believe me even if I was telling the truth. I could spill everything and they would never believe me. Not now, not ever.

Chris lurched upwards and grasped my collar. Ricky just look dumbstruck.

“No, Chris. I can explain…” Ricky trailed off. Chris shut him up with a glare. Ryan was still giggling quietly in the background. The singer kicked me in the shins until I gave out. From there, his toe was constantly attacking my chest. I howled in pain. Balz woke up, the noise was so loud.

“What’s going on?” He yawned.

“Chris. I’m so horny.” He chuckled over and over. My eyes widened through the tears. Chris twisted the collar around my neck and I struggled. He pulled me to my feet.

That’s when he turned me around and raked his nails down my back. I hunched over, flinching but falling still. Ricky was staring dumbly at Chris.

“Come ooooon, Motionless!” Ryan begged. His lust filled eyes were staring directly down at me.

“Have her.” The lead man growled. Ryan took my collar and started to drag me to the back lounge.

Wait, WHAT THE HELL DID HE JUST SAY!?

“Ricky!” I screamed out help. Ricky jumped up. Horny man plus undefended woman leads to disaster real quick.

“Come on, Horror. Let Sitkowski have his fun.” Chris barred the way to me. Ricky was pounding on him, screaming my name even.

“Fight, Orion!” He called. I tried to turn around in Ryan’s grip but he started to choke me. My vision was going out quickly. Black spots covered my exit. I choked out, tried to claw my way free.

And I felt Death on his dark horse approach me. I felt the electricity from Chaos, the snorts of Abyss, and could hear the cackling laugh of Death himself.

“Just let her go, Chris! She didn’t do anything wrong!” Ricky screamed. The last thing I saw was that Vinny and Ghost were trying to restrain him.

That’s when I was shoved into the back lounge. Ryan locked the door behind him as I landed with a heavy thud on the couch. My twisted ankle went numb and I was gasping in pain.

“Let her go!” Rick shouted so loud I was surprised the entire state didn’t hear him and come running.

Ricky pinned my wrists over my head so I couldn’t fight back. He bent down, kissing my neck and leaving little bites in his wake. It was like the land in the wake of a tempest.

“Ryan, I’m going to kill you!” Ricky threatened.

He flicked out a pocket knife, shredding my black shirt up the front so it fell off. I felt the tip of the knife bite into my skin at points. Ryan was still drunk and I was feeling the effects of it.

I heard more yelling, more screaming as my shirt and bra were yanked off. I started sobbing from what was happening. I was being raped. That’s it. I was going to be no longer innocent.

Ten minutes later, the room looked like a clothing tornado had shredded up a pair of my clothes and had just tossed Ryan’s to the side. I felt his body slamming against mine and pain ripping through me. There was no time to patiently adjust or to tell him to stop. With every thrust, I felt more and more weak.

“Ricky! Please, help me!” I screamed out. Ryan snapped and slapped me hard. I bawled harder. He started panting and I was getting to breathe heavy.

“Please, save me! Save me!” I howled. Ricky was in the other room, trying to call back. I felt the knot tighten and knew I was almost done. When I felt it go, I screamed out a name.

“RICKY!” I yelled. Ryan growled as I arched my back and fell back down. It was obvious he wasn’t satisfied that I wasn’t screaming his name. He slapped my face again. I knew there would be a red mark there that would last for another day.

I was weak. I was wasted. I was no longer innocent. I felt dirty. I felt used. It was a horrible, horrible feeling.

Ryan stood up, pulling his clothes on and growled in disgust as he walked out. I huddled into myself, feeling my naked body cold and bare against the world. I was sobbing hard into my hands.

There was a rush of footsteps, some cursing to Ryan, and then I felt Ricky at my side. I hid closer into the cushions.

I don’t want him touching me. I don’t want him to help me. I don’t want Ricky.

I want to be home. I want to be with my parents. I want to be excited to get to go to a concert. I wanted to be with my family on my birthday, not these captors and rapists.

A blanket was draped over me as I sobbed to myself. My entire body felt like I was on a massive vibration plate. I was shaking so hard.

If I had a knife, I would drive it through my heart right now. I don’t want to be living. I wanted to be dead. I felt so dirty that I should be thrown away. I should jump out of the bus when it goes down the highway.

I don’t want this life anymore.

“Hey, Rory…” Ricky whispered to me. I felt his hand stroke my hair and yelped.

No, I don’t want to be slapped again! I don’t want to be hurt or used!

“Stop!” I whimpered. He retreated as I buried my face into the blanket. I can’t face this anymore.

“Rory, it’s just me.” He whispered.

“If Ryan did that, you could to!” I sobbed. He sighed. I closed my eyes to the world and hid deeper into the safest place I knew-my mind.

“No, I would never do that to you. You can trust me, Little One.” He cooed. His hand reached to touch my shoulder again and I yelped as if it was a burning iron.

“Don’t hurt me!” I whimpered. He sighed once more.

“How can I trust you?” I whispered to him. After what Ryan did, it was as if reality had been revealed to me. How could I trust Ricky? Was I just a sex slave to all of them? Would he take my trust and break it in half?

In this business, you couldn’t trust anyone else.

“I didn’t hurt you, Rory. I’m sorry I couldn’t help you.” He begged. I curled into myself against the blanket. It sounded as if he was going to beat himself up over the fact that it happened. I shivered again. Ricky got up and left the room. I wiped away tears as fresh ones started to form.

Footsteps came back. I could hear them, but I was still closing my eyes. I saw blackness. I saw Death await me.

“I brought you some clothes.” He told me. I looked up at him. His sad blue eyes had tears that rimmed them as I reached one bare hand out to take them. He looked away as I changed. Into his boxers, short, and shirt. I grabbed my athletic bra from the floor since it had been salvaged. I felt a little better after that. At least I was covered now. Laying on the couch, I still curled up to protect my vulnerable body.

If Ryan did that once, he could do it again. Any of them could…

“Little One, I’m so sorry.” Ricky’s voice cracked as he turned around to face me. He knelt by the side of the couch. My heart started to break in two as I saw a tear trickle down his face.

Instinctively, I wrapped my arms around him and felt warmth flood my cold body. I felt as if almost every part of me had been broken. My confidence, my self-worth, my innocence. Everything had been ripped away from my body to leave a hollow shell for them to violate.

They took away everything, everything except my instinct to feel the sorrow that Ricky was feeling.

“Don’t let him hurt me, sir.” I blubbered into his shoulder. He held me close. I felt hot tears drip onto my neck.

“Never again.” He promised me. I let go and fell back into the couch, laying on the side. Ricky stood up, scooping me into his arms. I felt a pain prick at my legs and thighs. There were deep scratch marks on my shoulder blades. I closed my eyes and clung to his neck as if it were the only thing physical that was holding me to this world.

Wordlessly, Ricky took me out of the back lounge and set me down in his bunk. I shied away towards the wall and out of arms reach of anyone trying to grasp inside the bunk. I let small tears trickle down my cheeks and felt the agony soar through my body again.

I heard yelling outside, but I didn’t understand a word of it. My mind was too busy trying to figure out how to live after this.

“Why?” I whispered to myself over and over again until Ricky crawled in next to me. He sounded like he was trying to calm himself down.

“Just go to sleep, Little One. I’ll make sure no one tries to hurt you.” He kissed my cheek and turned over.

We didn’t sleep like the last few times I had spent the night in his bunk. We weren’t cuddled up with my head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. We weren’t snuggled close with Ricky humming soft lullabies in my ear. We weren’t falling asleep smiling.

We slept back to back. I faced the wall and he faced outside. I could tell he was still awake from the way he often restlessly turned. We slept with tear stained cheeks and choruses of why in our minds. We fell asleep with twisted torment scaring our lips.

I fell asleep with the sound of Death cackling in my ear and whispering, “You deserved this.”

Notes

O.O I'm sorry about this guys. I'm sorry if it was triggering. I'm sorry if I broke your feels.

Rory....Ryan....Ricky couldn't save her....What now?