"Honestly, I just don't think you get me. We're completely different and you know it." I sighed, forcing myself to look him in the eyes and just come out and say what I was feeling; how I was feeling. "I don't understand why you can't just accept me for who I am. I'm not like the people we hang out with. I'm not Jackie Kennedy. I'm not perfect. I can't be the perfect woman that you want. I can't be the woman that doesn't have an opinion around you. You know me well enough to know that I can't be that way. Steven," I sighed, my eyes tearing up as they found his; usually a beautiful baby blue but now they were getting cloudy and gray. "I think we should spend some time apart. You know, like..."

"-Breaking up? You want to break up?" He interrupted, the shock value increasing as he sat there and realized what I had just said. We'd been together for three years, easily my longest relationship to date.

I nodded softly, "Steven, I have to do what's best for me. For my happiness, and I'm just not happy." I wasn't happy about a lot of things. I was unhappy with his attitude, the way he treated me sometimes, our sex life, and most importantly, unhappy with the fact that I let myself get this unhappy to begin with.

Steven never broke his contact with me and I felt like I saw his heart breaking as the seconds passed. His bottom lip quivered for a moment before he sucked it up, nodded, and then left me alone. It was the first time I was truly alone since we had got together. It was kind of nice.

---

Sounds of a very rare rain pelted my window, startling me to say the least. This was Los Angeles, it never rained and we liked it that way. I got up from my couch with my hot cup of coffee held in my Elvis mug, and walked over to my window to take a gander at what was going on outside. I had never really liked the rain. The only reason I liked it was because it gave me an excuse to not do a damn thing but stay in my pajamas all day. And as a plus, it just happened to be Tuesday; my only day off.

I had my Deja Entendu vinyl spinning, causing waves of relaxation and happiness to float through me, as I made myself breakfast and continued to sip on my coffee. From the stove, I looked out to the living room and looked at my little artificial Christmas tree that had decorations all over it. I had an obvious major love for Christmas because that seemed to be the theme throughout my house. In every room there was a Christmas scented hand soap, and I had Christmas scented candles burning, and a little Christmas tree in the lounge room as well as downstairs. There was white Christmas lights wrapped around the stair rail and my stocking was hung over the broken fireplace. I don't know why I was always drawn to the holidays, but I did.

Just as I had flipped my pancakes and was about to start making my two eggs, over easy, there was a buzz coming from my door. It was strange to me for anyone to be here, seeing as how my boyfriend was on tour, my best friend's boyfriend was with him, and my best friend and I weren't speaking; so the fact that it was anybody freaked me out. I walked over and stood on my tip toes to look through the peephole but I couldn't really see.

I opened the door, expecting a mugger to storm in and come and steal my breakfast and possibly my fake little Christmas tree, but instead it was those blue eyes again-- Steven. "What are you doing here?" I smiled, a little freaked out he still knew where I lived. He hasn't been here since we were together; two years ago.

"Well, good morning to you, too!" He joked, "May I come in?"

I nodded before I walked away and went back to my breakfast. "What brings you here?" I asked again, genuinely wondering why the hell he was here.

He smiled sweetly opening up his black blazer and reaching into the inside pocket, and pulled a red envelope out. "Your dad wanted me to give you this." He handed it over to me and I took it, biting it with my teeth as I was flipping my eggs. It had my name written beautifully in cursive with black ink and the invitation inside was even more elegant.

You are cordially invited to attend the annual Black and Perez Christmas party. There will be food, drinks, and fun as we celebrate the most wonderful time of the year! One invitation guarantees a plus one.

Date: December 14th at 6 PM at the Four Seasons Hotel in Beverly Hills
Dress Code: Black tie

"Wow, the Four Seasons this year? Talk about fancy." I said, reading it, quite impressed at the location.

"I know, your dad said that they've been planning it all year. Made reservations in February for this." Steven said, ripping a piece of my bacon off and tossing it in his mouth.

I shot him a look, "Don't ever touch my bacon." He chuckled, leaning over the countertop and taking a look around. "You had to personally deliver my invitation?" I raised an eyebrow as I organized my food on my plate, not touching each other.

He chewed on his bottom lip for a moment before answering. "Your dad didn't want you driving in the rain to come get it?" He answered in the form of a question, making it painfully obvious that he made that up. By this time, I had both of my eyebrows raised at him, still wanting an answer. "Guess I just wanted an excuse to see you." He looked down at his shoes, blushing. "It's just ever since we broke up, I just acted like an asshole toward you because I was pissed that you dumped me. And, it was nice having you as a friend again." He admitted, looking like the second he said the last word, he wished he never said anything.

My brown eyes adverted to him, not trying to show emotion. I feet like you couldn't come off as weak around Steven, he can sense it very well. I guess during the last leg of our relationship, I became super guarded around him because he just got so full of himself and annoying and everything that came out of his mouth seemed like bullshit. But, this wasn't that Steven. Again, he seemed genuine. "Can I be honest?" He nodded carefully, as the last time I was super honest with him, he got his heart broken. "I've liked having you as a friend, too. I forgot that you could be a good listener sometimes." I smirked, cutting into my pancakes with a fork and taking a bite.

That perfect smile from him, the one that made me fall for him in the first place, came out and he brought out his hand, "Truce? Let's be friends again."

I chuckled, bringing out my hand as well and shaking his. "Truce."

He looked down at shoes again, then up at me and smiled. "Well, I better get back. I still have to stop and get your dad some coffee." I giggled, taking a sip of my own coffee. "You two are definitely related with your caffeine."

---

"What do you want for your birthday?" I asked Mike as we were on our usual Skype date. I was going through my closet and organizing it as best as I could.

"Hmm. Let's see. Definitely you. That's all I want." He smirked, making me scrunch up my nose, returning it to him.

"Mike! A real gift. What do you want? Weed? I'll buy you weed." I said earning a bellowing laugh coming from his end of the phone.

"You're so dumb. Bonnie, I literally don't want anything. My birthday's too close to Christmas, anyway. Just promise me you'll be at our show on my birthday?" His eyes gleamed with hope and it warmed my heart.

"Of course I'll be there. I promise. I wouldn't miss it for the world." He seemed satisfied with that answer than proceeded to fill me in on the tour life. I was jealous to say the least. He got to travel the world and play music, how cool is that?

As it turns out, even on my days off from everything, I still managed to focus on fashion and began to cut out pieces I liked from fashion mags and mix and match them. I sat on my bed, cross cross, with a bowl of grapes sitting there and playing my own version of a game of puzzle. My favorite seasons of the year were fall and winter because it gave women more leeway on what to wear. It's been commented on my fashion blog countless times that women are glad when it starts getting cold because that means it's time to bust out the tights and dresses and skirts and scarves.

I agreed. Simple staples like a good black leather jacket and some boots could go such a long way. This whole Everyday Looks of LA piece that Nicole and I were doing was becoming such a hit. Our friends over at UNIF even posted about it on their social media. It was fun to just see fashion go so close or so far depending on the person. Some people didn't care, and some people cared a lot. Some people tried so hard to look good, and some people just look effortlessly cool; it happens. Everyone is different and their views on what's 'in' is different, too. That's what I loved about fashion. It was easy to pick things out that you liked and make it your own. I always took advantage of that.

Around 5, I started getting ready for dinner at my parents house. I grabbed a pair of black skinny jeans, and put together a quick outfit for this little family dinner. My dad had begged me to come over for dinner since it'd been a thousand years since the last one. Once I was ready, I grabbed my bag and my keys and made my way out the door. The rain had stopped for the most part, just a little bit of drizzle every now and then.

I walked inside my parent's house, again, not knocking because I just didn't feel the need to knock. I walked in the kitchen and saw my mom cooking, with my dad, Uncle David, and good ol' Steven there, drinking scotch I smiled as I made my way and greeted everyone, "I thought this was a family thing." I commented making Uncle David almost choke on his drink and Steven laugh.

My dad let out a good and hearty laugh before bringing me into a hug. "This is family, Bonnie. Thanks for coming." He smiled softly.

I disregarded what his gratitude because I had a major migraine and I need some pain killers, stat. I had asked my mom where her 'good shit' was and she told me in the medicine cabinet, in between laughs. Once I got my pills, I took off my black bomber jacket and placed it on the couch, then took my pills with a glass of water.

Steven wasn't dressed in a suit anymore, he was wearing a lightweight burgundy hoodie with a pair of straight leg blue jeans and a pair of Nike Roshe's. "Your shoes don't match." I teased as I took a sip of my water to help wash down those horse pills.

"I knew you were gonna say that! I didn't know you were coming, and your mom said that you were on your way and I looked at my outfit and I was like, 'Great, Bonnie's gonna see me not matching now and make fun of me' and look, you did!" He admitted, holding his stomach from laughing so hard.

"Oh my god, you know me too well." I joined along in the laughter before leaving him to the guys and I went with my mom to help her out with dinner.

"I see you and Steven are getting along, again." My mom nudged me as I was shredding lettuce.

I nodded, "We made a truce. I don't know, since Nic and I haven't been speaking and since Mike is on tour, Steven's kinda my only friend right now." My bottom lip stuck out dramatically, but it was true. "It's nice to not roll my eyes whenever I see him." I let out a small laugh and my mom looked over to me.

"Bonnie, you better be careful." A look of concern washed over her face and it caught me off guard.

I scrunched up my nose, "Careful with what?"

"With Steven. You know how he is. Don't try and act so surprised, but Bonnie, he isn't over you in the slightest. On the night of that dinner where you brought Mike, he was telling Andrew, you remember Andrew, David's nephew? Well," her voice went down lower and she continued. "After a few scotches, he told Andrew that he really, really missed you and that he still loved you. And when he saw Mike, he got jealous, mainly because, and I quote, 'he gets her, and I don't, apparently'."

As soon as she said that, I thought back to when I broke up with Steven. I told him that he didn't get me, which was true. I mean, we were two years younger then, but I haven't changed. I'm still the same Bonnie I've always been. And Steven's right, Mike does get me. It's only been two months but nonetheless, he gets me.

I stayed quiet with this news, suddenly realizing he hasn't had a girlfriend since he and I broke up. We both hadn't dated during this time. Now I was beginning our replenished friendship. Was it truly genuine or did he have an agenda? Guess I won't know until something happens to uncover that truth.

Notes

THREE UPDATES IN A WEEK OH MY GOD IT'S A MIRACLE.

Alright guys, I'm getting into the swing again so bare with me on these stories.

ANYWAY, so what are your thoughts so far on the last three chapters? What about Steven making a reoccurring appearance in her life again-- even as just a friend? The last argument she had with Mike? AND, will Bonnie and Nicole EVER speak to one another again?

Leave your thoughts below because I enjoy feedback :)

Again, thanks for reading, y'all.

XO,
Amber