Austin's POV:

"Do I dare ask?" I let out, the exhaustion heavy in my tone.

"How am I supposed to know if you want to know or not?" she asked sarcastically with her eyebrows raised in question. Of course I wanted to know.

"Okay, fire away," I motioned with my hands for her to speak.

"I- I dreamt about the day Cole killed my boyfriend," she explained insanely calmly. I still didn't understand how she never shed a tear, ever!

"You had a boyfriend?" her head shot up.

"I'm not freaking the Virgin Mary!" she spat as if to make it out as though she was offended but I could tell she was hiding something more.

"Oh I can tell, the way you were speaking last night is not how a virgin talks," I winked. She laughed to herself and finally placed herself back on the bed since she'd jumped up after elbowing me. She pushed my chest in embarrassment warning me now was not the time to carry on from last night.

"Anyway, it was the same day he pushed me through my bedroom window. That's actually where most of my scars came from," she looked down admiring all the silvery, thin marks that stained her skin. I reached out to trail my finger along the longest scar that laid across the width of her thigh. Her breath hitched at my touch.

"That's too big to be an accident," I whispered against the scar as I kissed it. She pulled my head up to look at her.

"That's because it wasn't," I knew she was hinting to another time he'd cut her while removing her clothes violently. It bugged me how calm she was talking about it.

"How come none of this bothers you? You don't cry, you don't seem to be very effected by it," she looked at me surprised.

"Oh it affected me Austin. Believe me I'm not the girl I used to be, how I am now is the effect. I've changed a lot, probably for the better. I'm not weak any more, I can protect myself. The memories haunt me every night in my sleep and sure I wake up in a panic but I can't allow myself to live in fear. It's funny because the way I see it is he made me a stronger person, I owe him that," she laughed at her own sick theory. I found it hard to believe she really thanked him for turning her into a warrior. If it wasn't for him she wouldn't be so difficult and sheltered.

"I wish you'd let your guard down around me and let me protect you instead," I blurted. She looked surprised. I didn't mean to say that out loud she probably thinks I'm a total ass.

"You think I'm too hard on myself and everyone around me don't you? You think I should be easier at letting people in," I couldn't bring myself to reply, "I'll take that as a yes?" I nodded in return. "I don't expect you to believe me or understand me when I do the things I do and even sometimes say the things I say to look out for everyone else I care about but I wish you could," she sighed.

"How are you protecting me or Tarni or anyone by pushing us away? I try so hard and you wont let me show you what love can be like!" I felt like I was grilling her too hard but I needed answers, I was sick of standing back waiting for answers.

"Didn't you hear me before Austin? One of my boyfriends is dead! Anyone who involves themselves with me ends up fucking dead or leaving me! I don't trust people easily like you or Tarni do! It's not that fucking easy just stop pushing it, especially love. What the fuck is that anyway? You've known me for like four days and you're saying that word, just stop!" now I could tell she was angry but something she'd said during her rant sparked my attention.

"One of your boyfriends, how many do you have?" she rolled her eyes obviously annoyed that it was the only thing I had to reply with.

"None Austin. That came out wrong I just meant like one of my past boyfriends. I was single when I met you," she reassured me.

"How single?" I knew she was still hiding something.

"I just broke up with my fiancée that day because he was cheating on me single," she sighed.

"Fiancée huh? How'd you have time for a fiancée when you were a seventeen year old kid getting thrown into jail?" I scoffed.

"What's it matter to you?" I rolled my eyes at her, "Of course! By all means because it's soooo important to Mr. Carlile I shall proceed," she laughed sarcastically.

"Just fucking tell me!" I yelled. She looked at me with wide eyes surprised that I'd yelled at her. "I'm sorry, can you please just tell me?" I sighed again calming myself down.

"Cole covered up Rhys' death by arranging an engagement to one of his employees Bryce and writing a suicide note that explained Rhys' pain of me cheating on him. Legally nothing could happen to me but his parents hated me and nothing can ever ease the pain of losing a child and they thought I did that to their son, they still do. In the end I even eventually had feelings for Bryce, I hate myself for it because it just made the lie of Rhys' death a little bit more true but you cant help that sort of thing..." she trailed off.

"So you were still together when you went to jail?" stupid question.

"Well yeah I just said we broke up the day I got out and coincidently met you. Oh which by the way, I believe, shows that I have let my guard down around you. I mean I just met you four days ago and look how much you know about me," she laughed as I realised how right she was and just how wrong I was about her.

"I'm sorry about everything I said," it was a pathetic apology. She simply leaned in and placed a kiss on my cheek.

"Don't sweat it Aus, you can make it up to me with that sushi we never got?" she asked hesitantly.

"Of course. I'll pick you up around five, we can make it a dinner date?" she blushed and nodded. I lifted myself from the bed and leant down to place a kiss on her forehead before leaving to go back to the hotel.

I leave for the next concert of the Australian tour tomorrow morning. I better make an impression tonight. I want Leilani in my life, there was no doubt about it. We just needed to make this work somehow.

Notes

Sorry guys! I'm actually dissapointed in this chapter myself, it's just a filler!