It never ends

I didn’t realize I wasn’t dreaming until I was woke up. I can’t remember the last time I had slept without dreaming. It was alarming, and quite unnerving. I was jolted away. A small strike of panic rushed through me; I didn’t know what was happening until I opened my eyes. Whatever is was, I just wanted to go back to sleep.

The first thing I saw was Oliver. Leaning down on his knees right in front of me.

“Why are you out here?” he said. He didn’t look tired. He looked as if as if he’d been awake this entire time I was sleep. His brows were furrowed, and his hand were gripping the side of the couch. He was watching me , closely.

“What?” I yawned, still trying to gather my thoughts as I was slowly drifting back into consciousness. I took a glance outside, Judging by the darkness from outside it was about 3 in the morning. Meaning I barely got 2 hours of sleep. No Wonder I wasn’t dreaming, I was barely sleeping.

“Why are you sleeping out here?” Even though it was early in the morning, his voice still held the same tone as if it was in the middle of the day. But softer.
Like I had completely forgotten he was barely talking to me a few hours ago.

I shrugged my shoulders.
“What do you want Oliver, let me sleep” I caught the hostility in my voice. If he wasn’t going to tell me what was wrong with him, I won’t tell him why I was sleeping on the couch. It’s only fair.

“I want to know why you’re sleeping on the couch instead of in the bedroom with me” His eyes were saddened. Every time he made that face a part of me felt like it was my fault and I just wanted to apologize and make him smile. But at the same time I know this isn’t my fault.

He was so confusing. Maybe it was just me and I should be used to his rapid mood changes. But that’s no excuse to pretend like nothing happened.

“Oliver can I just go back to sleep. Can we talk in the morning” I groaned. If he wanted to talk, why was it so early in the morning, now , of any of the other times he could disturb me.

“Why are you sleeping on the couch?” I knew he wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. I didn’t have an exact reason. It was there and I was tired. Though I know that if Oliver would have told me what was going on with him in the first place, I probably wouldn’t be sleeping on the couch.
I didn’t answer.
“Come back to bed with me” The desperation in his voice was irresistible. I knew my stubbornness was probably preventing me from going.

“Why?” I tried to keep from caving, but I was one word from just letting myself being carried away.

“Because I can’t sleep” I paused. His voice was so smooth , but still managed to be raspy at the same time. He sounded so needy. I almost melted into the couch. I would continue arguing with him just to continue hearing him talk but I knew eventually he’d accept it and leave.
A few seconds passed by. I can’t say no now. I knew he would hold it against me. And I know myself enough to know I’d feel terrible and wouldn’t be able to sleep the rest of the night.
“Okay, fine” I said, sitting up. I was momentarily dazed before Oliver grabbed my hand and led me to the bedroom. The room was 8 degrees colder than the living room and I felt it as soon as I walked in.
An unwelcome feeling spread through me immediately.
Oliver pulled on my hand again and led me towards the bed. Not saying anything as he laid down, and I followed. I immediately relaxed. His warmth engulfed me. I felt myself drifting back to sleep. Letting go of the tensions I didn’t know were there until I began to relax.
Why was he being so affectionate? This wasn’t like his usual behavior. There’s something he’s not telling me and it irritated me. I don’t like him keeping stuff from me. He’s not going to willingly tell me and I can’t trick him so the only thing left is to wait. Wait until he’s in a better mood. Or just wait until he tells me himself, which I doubt he would do.
I let my concerns seep away as I slowly fell to sleep.

Light filled the room. A warm, but dim orange light blanketing the room.
I turned to Oliver, he was fast asleep. He looked relaxed, not like how he is when someone’s watching. It’s tempting to reach out and touch him, he’s so lovely when he’s asleep.
When I got up I saw I was wearing the clothes I had on last night. I felt a twinge of disgust. I don’t like getting into bed with my outside clothes on, let alone sleep, but I can’t change that now.
It was about 8:30 in the morning. And since yesterday was Sunday, today was Monday, which meant I had classes. My classes start at 9:00. That pretty much gives me 30 minutes to get ready and drive all the way there.
The apartment was quiet, comfortably silent. I didn’t feel like waking him up or waiting for him to wake up. I got dressed in simple jeans and a t-shirt. I got my keys from the counter and a piece of paper and pen. I quickly wrote a quick note just saying where I was and left it on the counter. I had a feeling he would be a little upset when he woke and I wasn’t here. I felt a pinch of guilt, but he’ll be alright. If anything he’ll call me when he wakes up.
I got my bag and left.
I made the trip pretty fast. I didn’t have any time to spare but I wasn’t late. I made it just when the last student was going through in the classroom.
I heard the door open and the pounding footsteps of someone. I turned around to see who it was.
It was Alex. Panting and out of breath. I was relieved to see it was him. After out last encounter I felt we just needed to hang out but not specifically intended to talk to each other. I didn’t want to ruin our friendship.
I couldn’t help but laugh a little.
“What happened?” I asked walking into the classroom. The room was relatively small, but then again so was the class.
“I thought I was late, but my clock was just late by an hour.” His face was flushed and little beads of sweat damped his hair.
“oh” I nodded. It was obvious he really thought he was late. He looked completely disheveled and messy.
Because I was the last in the classroom I had to sit in the back, which I had no problem with. As I sat down, I realized Alex left a seat between us. Was this his way of dismissing our friendship?
I looked at him and then at the seat. He noticed and began to explain.
“I’m waiting for someone” he said. Barely looking at me. I had a bad feeling in my stomach but decided to let it go.

Everything in class was normal, even though I couldn’t see the bottom of the board because I was in the back.
During a writing section on the class, the door suddenly burst open.
My heart dropped as I saw who stood there.
Celeste; Standing confidently in the doorway. I knew why she was here, because of Alex, and I’m still sure she’s only with him to bug me.
I tried to ignore her as she made a scene with her sky high heels. I noticed some of the guys and even some girls, in class heads turn as she walked by them in a black skin tight dress and large silver hoop earrings.
She plopped down in the seat between me and Alex. I noticed she didn’t have any books nor did she have any notebooks. She had nothing except a purse I’m sure was only filled with makeup and hair products.
I tried my best to ignore their conversation. But it was so unavoidable.
“Hey baby” Celeste said alluringly, scooting her chair disgustingly close to Alex. She was somehow done up more than usual. Her nails looked like she got them done an hour ago. Her outfit was specifically picked out to show as much skin a possible but covered enough so that the teacher or any authority can’t call her out on it. She was really trying too hard, and I couldn’t express how much I hated her. I was to the point where even a mention of her name sent waves of anger throughout my body.
But here she was, sitting right next to me. Messing with me and playing Alex. Why would she do that to him? Does she even care…probably not.
Throughout the lesson I tried to focus on the professor. But considering he wasn’t that loud and I was all the way in the back made that impossible.

The rest of the 20 minutes left of class passed by. I was so relieved. I couldn’t gather my stuff and get pit the door fast enough. Everyone was pushing and shoving each other to get out the door, including the teacher. Again, because I was in the back, I was last.
As everyone left, they stood outside, catching up and talking about the lesson.
Just as I was about to open the car door , I felt a tap on my shoulder. I left the key dangling in the lock as I turned around.
My stomach dropped as I saw Alex standing there.
He looked nervous as he stood there. His hand rubbing the back of his neck.
“hey” he started, unsure if he should continue. ”About what happened” I put my hand up, silencing him before he could finish his sentence.
“you don’t need to explain, I should have known she would follow you around like a lost puppy”
Alex pressed his lips together. “Yea, I guess I should have told you in the beginning”
I shook my head. “No, you don’t need to tell me anything. Just know that I do care about you, but Celeste doesn’t, I don’t know what she’s doing but-“
It was Alex’s turn to interrupt me. “Skyler stop worrying about me, I can handle myself I’m not a damn child”
“I can’t help but feel worried, you’re blind-“
“I’m not blind” Alex’s anger was building up.
“Don’t you think it’s a coincidence she decided to date you, technically the first friend I had here, and when did she suddenly become interested in literature enough to switch classes!”
“You’re not even giving her a chance!” Alex clenched his jaw, he face was red. I know I should just give it up. But I can’t.
“I don’t need to give her a chance, she’s not a good person!”
“Well at least Celeste didn’t fuck me for a bet” And with that he stormed off.
I stood, frozen and shocked. I was waiting for him to blow and he did. I knew he had been waiting to say that; waiting to dump that on me. I had nothing else to say because it was true.
I got in the car and drove off.

Notes

This chapter isn't thoroughly edited so i apologize for the errors.
Sorry for the long wait, it would have been up sooner but things happened.
I didn't spend as much time on the song choice, I might change it later but I really wanted the chapter up today.
Title Credit: Paramore