After 2 months of doing that same routine, we still had no progress or lead whatsoever. We had posted to every post possible and we had asked almost half of the people here in Michigan if that’s really even possible... still no lead. So I decided that I’m gonna try even harder this time. I’m not gonna stop until I find the love of my life and nothing is gonna stop me from doing that.

The guys also changed.. At first they were so supportive of this, Helping almost all of the time but then they started helping me less.. but I get it though I understand that they have their own lives to live. I’m not mad at them or anything like that, I guess they don't care about Vic as much as I do so I took it upon myself to go and find him not stopping until he’s here.. with me.. I don't care how long, I don't care what the weather, I don't care what people say about me, I don't care if I'm completely alone in this. I don't even care about things anymore. All I care about right
now is finding Vic.

"So Kell, Me and the guys are actually going to see a movie today. want to come?" Justin asked me cheerily

"Nah. thanks but I think I’m gonna pass. I still need to hand this out" I told him while waving the flyers I was holding.

"C’mon man. take a rest. We’ll help you later" he insisted.

"No thanks" I really didn’t feel like it today.

"Ok but--"

"I said NO" I said a bit rudely. I didn't mean to. he was just forcing me even though I said no.

"Pssh. I was just trying to cheer you up" and with that Justin walked away. I felt bad but I shrugged it off I still had to do what I had to today for Vic.

---

"Yeah and that part where.. "

"Yeah I know... haha. Oh hey Kell. Your’e back already?" Jesse said. the guys stopped talking when they saw me in the house almost as if they had seen a ghost.

"Uhmm.. yeah .. " I said awkwardly.

"Whats this?" Jesse pointed at the backpack in front of me. I had packed it earlier because I had decided to move out. I know Jesse doesn’t really mind me being here but I had thought of this brilliant plan.

"Oh that.. uhhmm.. I’m moving out" I said awkwardly scratching the back of my head.

"Hey what’s wrong? why so sudden? " Jesse said pouting a bit

’"Nothing. I just had this brillant plan" I informed.

"Oh. ok. uhmm. what plan?" He asked.

"Im going to camp outside the music shop... you know where Vic and I first met.. I just.. I got a good feeling about this.. you know?" I told them. The guys gave me a look like they were sorry or something. I notice Justin just shrugged, I think he’s still upset about earlier.

"Kell, you don't have to do this you know?" Jesse said concern trailed on his voice.

"But I have to.. if- I-if he was in a coma just like I was before... I just think that.. its the first place that he would go" I explained. I could feel my face getting warmer by the minute, I was about to break down again I could feel it.

"Ok. Good luck buddy." He looked at me like he was contemplating about something.

"Whatever you wanna do. We’ll support you.. If you need any help don't ever hesitate to call." He added. Jesse must have notice me about to break down cause he didn't even tried to stop me. He is so understanding about this. He was the only one that ever did understand.

"So how long will you stay there?" Justin blurted out without even looking at me.

"I-I dont know, until he shows up.. I guess" I admitted. The look of sympathy in their eyes made me feel sad. They don't look like they supported it.

"SO HOW LONG EXACTLY?!" Justin raised his voice a little higher, this tme he was looking at me. Jesse nudged Justin telling him to calm down but Justin shrugged it off. What is wrong with him?

"I dont know.. a-as long as it takes" I admitted. I never really taught about it like that but I cant back down now.

"THAT’S BULLSHIT KELL!!." he exclaimed.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM JUSTIN?!" I shouted, what’s wrong with him. why cant he just support me like a good friend would.

"WHAT’S MY PROBLEM?! WHAT’S YOUR PROBLEM?! I MEAN LOOK AT YOU DUDE. LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO YOURSELF, YOU DON'T EAT. YOU DON'T SLEEP. I MEAN CAN'T YOU EVEN DO SOMETHING THAT’S NOT EVEN VIC RELATED? ITS LIKE YOUR ALIVE BUT YOUR NOT EVEN LIVING ANYMORE, YOUV’E BECOME THIS TOTALLY OBSESS
BOYFRIEND OR MONSTER OR WHATEVER; AND DON'T GET ME WRONG I’M NOT SAYING THIS BECAUSE I DON'T CARE, I’M SAYING THIS BECAUSE I DO CARE, I CARE ENOUGH TO LET YOU KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING. I'M NOT GONNA GO
AROUND AND SAY I 'SUPPORT' YOU TO THROW YOUR LIFE AWAY FOR SOMEBODY WHO’S PROBABLY EVEN DEAD BY NOW. I MEAN SURE VIC IS IMPORTANT TO YOU, HE’S IMPORTANT TO US TOO, HE WAS OUR BEST FRIEND AND YOU’RE OUR FRIEND TOO, WE CANT JUST STAND THERE SEEING YOU LIKE THAT. HE’S GONE NOW KELLIN. IT’S BEEN TWO MONTHS. GOSH. MOVE ON ALREADY. I’M SURE HE WOULD WANT YOU TO DO THE SAME." he ranted putting air quotes on the word 'support' and I swear at this
moment I’ve never felt so numb, I just sat there looking dumbfoundingly at Justin. Its like I want to cry but nothing’s coming out, did he seriously just said that to me? I couldn’t believe he would say such things.

What he said just made me realize something, the fact that I now have NOBODY, I’m all alone in this.Nobody likes me anymore, even my friends don’t want me because of this ’state’ I’m in. I don't know what to do anymore, I just wished I had never woken up from my coma. Justin just made me feel so sad about my existence and I realized I was crying again.

"GOD JUSTIN! YOU JUST HAD TO TELL HIM THAT!" Jesse shouted at Justin.

"I HAD TO TELL HIM THE TRUTH, YOU GUYS DIDN’T HAVE THE BALLS TO SAY IT!!" he replied to Jesse.

"WE WERE SUPPOSED TO TELL HIM THAT WHEN HE’S ATLEAST STABLE ENOUGH!" Jesse is fumming.

"HE’LL NEVER BE STABLE! NOT IN THIS STATE HIS IN!" Justin spatted. I just looked at them in awe I couldn’t even believe the stuff that they’re saying. Its like I’m not even in the room right now. I dont wanna hear this anymore. I stood up, got my bag and left. I cant stand them right now. I cant believe that this is what my friends taught of me... I was walking down the street, I could hear Jack and Gabe calling my name.

"Kellin wait!" Gabe shouted.

"Kell! they didn't mean it. it was just a heat of the moment thing " Jack said.

Heat of the moment my ass. that’s exactly what they were thinking of me. I just ignored them and continue walking to my destination. So I just lost my friends. what more could I possibly
have to lose now?

Notes