Angel

It was becoming harder to breathe and my chest hurt but I pushed it aside and tried to seem unaffected. "Okay? Is that all you wanted to say?" I asked them, "Did you just come here to upset me? It won't work, I'm done with all of this! Now get the hell out of my house!" I said harshly and looked away from them to wash my dishes. I heard the back door open and close, I didn't feel alone though. I turned around to find Mike. "I thought I told you to get out." I said more calm, I had calmed down knowing it was just Mike. He was quiet the whole time Vic was here.
"You told Vic to leave because what he was talking about, you were only looking at him as well." Mike said, damn he was smart ass.
"Okay fine, you got me there." I said then leaned on the counter looking at him. "What do you want to talk about?" I asked and he looked confused, "You surely wanted to talk about something by asking to come over." I said to him.
"Oh no, I wasn't going to talk about anything in particular remember? It's my job to make you happy and keep you happy, so that's what I'm doing." He said and I giggled, about an hour later we were in the living on the couch still talking and I was happy for the first time since my attempt. That's when Mike changed the subject. "Why Rose?" He asked me softly.
"Why what?" I asked confused, there could be a lot of things.
"Why won't you go see Tony, and why the suicide attempt?" He was looking at me with a serious look. Fuck he wanted an answer, I looked down so I wasn't looking at him anymore.
"Many reasons." I mumbled, Mike lifted my chin with his finger and made me look at him. He softly kissed my forehead.
"You don't have to tell me, but I sure would like it if you did." His face softened and he looked at me hopeful. I sighed really loud before deciding to let it all out.
"It's all my fault! I had a feeling Mitch was gonna come back and when he was apologizing, I saw right through him! He knew I wouldn't get close to him, he knew Tony is my reason I'm alive! The one thing he didn't know was that I'm pregnant." Mike tried to stop me but I just kept talking and ignored him. "Tony was walking up to shake his hand for the truce and I knew Mitch was going to stab him! Mike, I just let it happen and watched letting him fall unconscious! I could have done something to stop it, at the hospital that day I just felt him comforting me but he's in a coma!"
Tears were starting to come as I continued. "I left because I didn't want to feel that, I aslo knew Mitch would survive me stabbing him and he'd come after me. That's why I headed to my cabin, you guys said you'd be there soon and I didn't want to be around people and I was fine at first!" Tears were falling down from my eyes. "I was fine and wanted to be alone, I needed to stay there a few more days and the easiest way for that to happen was have some reason to stay! That's when the guilt was setting in! It's my fault Tony's dying and it's my fault he was ever in the coma!"
I was crying and Mike was trying to calm me down, "I did the attempt of suicide because I'd rather be dead than live with that guilt! I wanted to be dead in that moment! But now, I'm not so sure what I want." I finally stopped talking, wiped my tears away then moved away from Mike. It was quiet for a while, neither of us spoke or moved. I closed my eyes to calm down, and then I felt Mike moving. Not a minute later, I felt Mike's lips softly placed on mine.

Notes

What do you guys think? Whose watching or with people watching the super bowl? I'll be listening to my father to see what's going on haha but I'll keep posting to catch up.