Now It's Your Turn To Run
Pretend Like I Don't Entice You
Delaney
Ashlynn cooked an amazing breakfast for Mike and I, and that only added to my suspicions about her. I felt like she was sucking up to me for some reason - as if she was trying to distract me with perfectly cooked pancakes and an expertly folded omelette. Even though I was aware of this, it still worked. I was completely preoccupied for most of the morning. My thoughts strayed away from the thought of Ashlynn’s secrecy and instead I focussed on cleaning my bedroom and taking out the trash. It wasn’t until I exited the shower and heard Ashlynn’s footsteps walking through the kitchen that I remembered everything Mike had been telling me the night before.
After putting on some comfortable clothes, I twisted my hair up into a towel so it could dry and then exited my bedroom - careful not to make it too obvious that I was trying to see what Ash was up to. She was standing in the kitchen with her phone grasped in between her hands, her thumbs tapping away at the screen and a small smile playing on her lips. I looked her over and noticed that her shoes were on and her purse was hanging from her shoulder.
“Hey,” I said, casually. I chuckled as she jumped a bit at my words. I watched as she quickly put her phone in her purse and then turned to face me.
“You scared me,” she said with a smile.
I smiled back and wondered if I even needed to ask the question that was on my mind. I was certain that she knew exactly what I was going to ask her. I could see the guilty look on her face.
“I’m heading out,” she said, half-answering the question that was playing on my mind.
I decided to not even ask her where she was going or who she was going to see. I was sick of her excuses, and although I wanted to call her out on her poor lying skills, I figured I should just leave it alone. She was an adult, and she had clearly changed since she had moved away from San Diego. If she didn’t want to have an open, honest relationship with me, then so be it. I had to learn to accept the fact that maybe she wanted to keep things to herself. Plus, I was guilty of doing the same thing to more people than just my family.
I thought about Jaime for a second and then remembered that the boys wanted to head out tonight. “Ash!” I called out as she began to walk away. She stopped walking and turned around. “Hey, don’t forget that tonight we’re all going out. I really want you to join us. I mean, if you want to.”
She gave me a warm smile and her features softened when she realized that I wasn’t going to interrogate her. “I’d love to go. Just text me and tell me what time.”
I smiled in return and gave her a small nod before I watched her walk away, shutting the door behind her. She walked passed the front window, her phone already back in her hands as she selected a number and put it up to her ear. She disappeared from my sight and I just continued to stare out the window, not really looking at anything or thinking about anything. Just staring.
My phone began to ring from my bedroom and I ran over to it, picking it up right before the final ring.
I slid my finger across the screen as I stared at the caller ID picture. Jaime.
Before I could even say anything, he spoke up.
“Hey, can you let me in?”
I walked back out to the living room and saw him standing in front of the window. A huge smile was spread across his face as he frantically waved at me. He pointed at the door and then back at me, as if I couldn’t hear what he had said on the phone. I rolled my eyes, held the phone up so he could clearly see the screen, and hit the end button. He mocked a face of hurt and surprise, his hand that he was waving was clutching his heart as he stumbled back a few steps.
As I made my way across the living room, my stomach felt funny. I felt nervous and almost wanted to turn around and not let him in just so I could avoid the anxious feeling that was tickling my stomach. I took in a few shaky breaths and pulled the door open before I could back out.
Jaime’s cologne instantly filled my nose and I felt the nervous feeling return again, even stronger than it had been just a few seconds prior. I looked at his smiling face for only a moment before I had to look away. I used to get so lost in his dark eyes and dimply smile. I couldn’t stand to look at him. All I kept thinking about was how he had pinned me to the door a couple nights ago and how much I had liked it.
**
Ashlynn came home with just enough time to change her clothes before we headed out. Vic was the one in charge of all the plans, as usual, and he wanted to do something a little bit different than what we normally did. We would usually just meet up at our usual bar and drink until we couldn’t form proper sentences anymore, but tonight Vic wanted us to go out to dinner - all of us. I was excited for a nice dinner, especially since Jaime had already insisted on picking up my tab since he knew I was low on money. I wanted to fight him on it, but he really wanted me to go. And of course he was such a gentleman that he insisted on paying for Ashlynn’s, too. Even though she could probably afford it on her own. He even offered to be our designated driver so we could have a few fancy drinks while out to dinner.
Jaime was outside, honking the horn, right at seven o’clock. As soon as I heard him honking the horn - much more than necessary, might I add - Ashlynn and I hurried out the front door. I made sure to lock it and then shoved my keys in my purse before we walked down the stairs. He pulled up right beside the staircase so we didn’t have to walk across the parking lot - another act of chivalry on his part. As soon as I approached the car, Jaime was at my side. He pulled open the backseat door for Ashlynn and then pulled the passenger door open for me, a smug smile on his face.
Ashlynn climbed in, muttering a shy thank you, before he shut the door for her. But I just stood there, my arms crossed over my chest as I stared at him with narrowed eyes.
“What?” Jaime asked with a smirk on his face. He had a knowing look in his eyes mixed with what looked like determination. He wouldn’t look me dead in the eyes for long, though. He looked away as soon as he saw me searching his eyes.
“What are you up to, Preciado?” I questioned, leaning in just a bit and narrowing my eyes a tiny bit more to try and see if I could notice anything that would give him away. He was acting differently ever since that night that he had come on to me, and I wanted to know what he was doing, because he clearly had a motive in mind, and I was afraid to guess what it might be.
“Oh no, she’s calling me by my last name,” Jaime cringed as he spoke up, his voice louder than it needed to be for our conversation.
“What did you do now?” a voice called out from the backseat.
I poked my head into the vehicle and saw Tony sitting in the backseat. When he saw me he smiled and gave me a small wave. “Hey, Delly,” he greeted. “How are you?”
“Oh, hey, Tone. I didn’t know you were back there,” I said. “I’m alright, thanks. You?”
“I’m great, actually,” he said with a large grin as something seemed to pop into his mind.
I quickly looked over to Ashlynn, careful not to move my head and make my gaze obvious, and checked to see what her reaction was. If what Mike said was true, then could it be Ashlynn that was making Tony so happy? Just before Ashlynn moved back, Tony was angry and short with everyone and looking to get laid. His mood was immediately better the next day, and I just assumed that he had gotten laid, but maybe-
“Delly, are you going to get in the damn car? What the heck are you doing?” Jaime asked from behind me, causing me to break my thoughts and turn around so I could sit down in the seat. Jaime shut the door for me and then made his way around to the driver’s side so he could get in the car and bring us to downtown San Diego so we could meet up with everybody else for dinner.
The restaurant we were heading to was fancier than what I was used to, but from my understanding, it wasn’t anything too ‘hollywood’, as I liked to put it. It was about a thirty minute drive from my apartment to the restaurant. It would be a shorter drive, but the city traffic in Downtown San Diego added on an extra fifteen minutes to the journey.
Jaime was quiet as he drove, but his smile was still lingering on his lips. It was slowly fading, but probably only because his cheeks were getting sore. His eyes were still bright and happy, even when the smile was nearly gone from his lips.
Tony and Ashlynn were casually chatting in the backseat - their conversation was drown out by the sound of the air conditioning and music from the radio, so I couldn’t eavesdrop. I shook my head, trying to rid my mind of the motives I had for the night. I was becoming too obsessed with the Tony-Ashlynn rumor that Mike had fed me. Because that’s all it had to be - a rumor. They had just met. How would they be sneaking around right beneath our noses? But then it made me wonder: what if I was the only one who didn’t know? Mike seemed to have some sort of knowledge that was driving his ideas - something that was making him believe so strongly in something that we’ve never actually seen.
But what if he had seen something?
“Delly-boooo,” Jaime sang, dragging out the ending of my nickname. He reached over and gently squeezed my thigh, leaving his hand there once he had already gotten my attention. “You okay?” He turned to look at me as we pulled up to the stoplight that we had been inching towards for the past ten minutes, finally reaching the front of the line of cars, just to be stopped at the red light.
I stared at his hand, not even bothering to answer. I didn’t even think I could answer him if I wanted to. My thigh was tingling from his touch, sending internal shivers up my spine as my skin broke out in goosebumps. This feeling was all too familiar. This was a feeling that only Jaime could give me. This was a feeling that reminded me of how much I had been longing for an affectionate touch - not just from anybody, not even Nathan. Only Jaime.
Jaime lifted his hand and placed it back on the wheel as the light finally turned green, leaving my thigh feeling as if it was exposed more than my ripped leggings allowed. His hand on my leg was such a simple gesture, but to me it felt like I had been missing something and when he placed his hand on my thigh, that something was back, and I was complete again.
“We’re here!” Jaime cheered as we pulled up to the valet parking. He handed the keys to the valet along with a cash deposit to pay for the parking as the rest of us got out of the car. I watched as Tony helped Ashlynn step out of the vehicle by gently holding her right hand.
“Can you hold this for a second?” she asked him, holding out the striped clutch that she was carrying. Tony nodded and grabbed the purse as Ash took her hand back from his grasp and straightened out her skirt in the back to make sure it was covering everything that needed to be covered.
I jumped as a hand gently slid around the small of my back. For a moment I was unsure of who it was, but by the way he rested his palm on my hip and gently held onto my side, his fingers curled up just a bit so he could grasp some of the fabric of my shirt in his hands, I knew it was Jaime. It was how he used to hold me back when we dated. It was his way of claiming me when we were at the bar, or at parties, and it was his way of telling me that he was by my side, no matter what. And here he was, even after a break-up and an engagement, still by my side.
Mike and Vic got there before we did and went ahead and got a table. The waiter led us to the back of the restaurant, passed the tanks of fresh lobster and the beer brewery that made the restaurant’s signature beverage. The floors were spotless and the chairs to all the tables were made of dark wood, with no chips or signs of usage at all. This was definitely close to what I imagined a ‘hollywood’ restaurant to be, and I almost felt underdressed. But when the table came into view and I saw Mike and Vic each wearing backwards snapbacks, I didn’t feel so underdressed anymore.
They stood up to greet us, each of them walking around the table to give everybody a hug. As I hugged Mike, I noticed two girls standing just beside the table. One of them was just barely getting out of her seat, whispering something to the other girl as they both adjusted their clothing.
“Which one is yours?” I whispered into Mike’s ear. Before he could answer, I made my own prediction on which one was probably with Mike. I recognized her instantly - her short, blonde hair was curled and her makeup was simple but flawless. She was wearing a crop top with high-waisted shorts and a large, over-sized jacket to cover herself up a bit. “Is that her?” I asked, my eyes staring over her tattoos as she shyly made her way over.
Mike didn’t even need to look at who I was referring to. He nodded and pulled away, instantly turning and placing his hand on the blonde’s shoulder, guiding her over to where we were standing. “Delaney, this is Alysha,” he said. “Alysha, this is Delaney, the one I was telling you about.”
“Oh no, what did you tell her?” I joked, shaking my head as I reached my left hand out to meet her for a handshake. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”
Her face lit up when I said the word finally, as if she was excited to hear that Mike had been talking about her to me. Even though he didn’t give me specifics about her, he did make it clear that he had strong feelings for her.
She opened her mouth to say something in return, but instead Vic spoke up, all of us instantly turning our heads back toward the table where he was standing with his arm wrapped around the waist of a red-headed girl that I had never seen before.
“Guys, this is my girlfriend,” he said, pausing to give her a warm smile, “Danielle.”
I almost blurted out, ‘since when do you have a girlfriend?’, but decided to hold my tongue. I didn’t want to sound rude and make Danielle feel awkward or maybe even hurt that Vic had never mentioned her.
“Danielle, this is Delaney, and that is her cousin Ashlynn,” he said, pointing each of us out. “And you know the guys.”
I felt hurt that Vic had introduced his girlfriend to the guys and never even mentioned her to me. Vic and I weren’t the closest out of the bunch, I had always been around Jaime and Tony the most, and Mike just kind of weaseled his way into my life, but Vic seemed to be the most disconnected from us all. Maybe it was because he was busy being the frontman of the band, or because he had a secret girlfriend that everybody but me knew about - either way, I felt like I hardly even knew Vic anymore.
We all took our seats around the circular table and I somehow ended up sitting in between Alysha and Jaime. I didn’t mind sitting next to them, but I felt like I had abandoned Ashlynn. She hardly knew the guys and yet she was seated across the table from me with Tony on her right and Vic on her left.
“I went ahead and ordered a round of the house brew for everyone, I hope that’s okay,” Mike announced to the table. “The tab is on us tonight,” he said, motioning between Vic and himself.
“No way,” Jaime spoke up right away. “I can’t let you guys do that. That’s way too much money.”
“Oh come on, Himes,” Vic said. “It’s not like we can’t afford it. Seriously, it’s fine. We already talked about it and we want to pay for you guys.”
“If you insist,” I muttered to myself, earning a stifled laugh from Alysha. “I wasn’t going to pay anyways,” I whispered to her as I pointed a finger over to Jaime to tell her that he was going to pay.
“Mike never told me that you two were together,” she said. “But I’m actually not surprised. You guys fit.”
“Oh,” I said, a heavy breath escaping my lips. “Um, we’re not together...anymore.”
“Oh,” she said, her cheeks turning red and her eyebrows furrowing. “Sorry, Mike mentioned that you were engaged and I just assumed...I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed.”
I waved my hand in the air, dismissing her apology because it wasn’t necessary. “Ain’t nothin’ but a thang,” I said, casually turning my attention to the menu in front of me.
“Hey!” Jaime spoke up, butting his way into our conversation. “That’s my phrase!”
“You bet your buns it is,” I said, stealing another one of his phrases. I gave him a goofy smile, making sure to puff out my cheeks and make a duck-bill with my lips.
“Only you can make a duck-face look cute,” Jaime said, chuckling to himself. I instantly changed my expression, feeling suddenly shy as he complimented me so openly at the table. I could feel Mike staring at me, probably wanting to catch my gaze so he could ask me about Jaime’s comment, but I kept my head down and bit the inside of my cheek to hide the smile that was trying to show.
I picked one of the less expensive meals on the menu, not wanting to take full advantage of my wealthy, and generous, friends. If it was only Jaime paying for my meal, I wouldn’t have cared so much. But since Mike and Vic were taking on the entire bill, I decided to hold back, even though the lobster feast was calling my name.
We went around the table, taking turns with our orders, and when it came to my turn, I recited my order: “I’ll have the baked ziti with chicken. But can I get the chicken cut into chunks instead of strips?”
The waitress nodded and then collected my menu, turning her attention to Jaime to get his order. “I’ll have the lobster feast with extra butter on the side please. Oh, and can I get two of the the baby forks?”
The waitress chuckled. “The lobster forks?” she corrected. “Sure thing.”
I sighed as Jaime handed his menu over, wishing that I could have gotten that damn lobster feast.
After the waitress left, Vic immediately started to babble on about their upcoming tour. They only had a couple months to prepare for the tour and of course Vic, being the over-prepared little man that he is, already was trying to figure out the setlist. Jaime and Tony kept turning all of his suggestions down until Vic had literally listed every song they’ve ever recorded. Vic stopped for a moment, and then finally caught on to their scam. “Real funny, you guys. Way to be mature.” He rolled his eyes, getting a little frustrated. I watched as Danielle placed one hand on his shoulder as her other hand made circles around his back to calm him down.
The conversation was light, each topic not lasting much longer than two minutes before someone jumped on to something new to discuss. I wasn’t participating in the conversation much, I was too busy watching how Ashlynn seemed to be so comfortable as she helped carry on each of the topics. She wasn’t an extremely shy person, but the last couple of times she had hung out with the boys, the conversations never involved her too much. Not like this. She was smiling and adding her own personal anecdotes and laughing along with everybody as if she had been a part of the group for years. I was glad that she was feeling accepted and comfortable, but I couldn't help but wonder if it was Tony that was making her feel that why.
I groaned and put my hands on my head, looking down at my lap and taking a couple of deep breaths to calm myself down. Why was I getting so worked up over this? Why did I care so much?
I released my head and looked back up at the table. Nobody had noticed my frustration, or if they did, they didn't question it at all. As if right on cue, my phone vibrated from inside my purse that was sitting on the table. Jaime looked over to me for a brief second while in the middle of telling a story I had probably already heard, but then looked back to the rest of the table when he saw me reaching for my phone. I pulled my iPhone out of my purse and stared at the name on the screen that showed up beside the green iMessage icon. I could see a preview of his text message sitting on my screen, but I didn’t want to read them.
“Who was it…Oh,” Jaime asked as he looked over my shoulder, reading the name on the screen. “Hey Del-”
I smacked his arm as he began to read the text message out loud to himself. “Shush,” I hissed, smacking his arm once more just for emphasis. “I don’t want to read it yet.” I shoved the phone back into my purse and then hooked it along the edge of my chair so the vibrations of new text messages wouldn’t bother me.
Our food arrived and I couldn’t help but drool over the giant mound of lobster legs that Jaime had in front of him. Mike got the same thing for him and Alysha to share. Everyone around me had it and I was stuck with the stupid baked ziti pasta with chicken.
“Here,” Jaime muttered, placing one of the lobster forks on my napkin along with a small cup of the melted butter to dip the lobster meat in. “I saw you staring at it on the menu. You practically moaning as you looked at it.”
“Jaime, this is your meal. I have mine. I’m not going to eat yours. I can’t.” I shook my head, but my eyes remained fixated on his plate.
“Please shut up,” Jaime groaned, rolling his eyes.
I gave him a shocked expression, my mouth open and my eyebrows furrowed. “Dang, Mr. Sassy Pants,” I said, staring at him in disbelief. “Rude.”
He chuckled a bit, but then saw that I was actually going to decline his offer for sharing his food. I picked up my fork and stabbed one of my noodles, making sure to get a piece of chicken with it. I shoved it into my mouth, staring at him as I chewed on my pasta. I tried to convince myself that I was eating lobster, but with the smell of the real lobster in my nose, I just couldn’t stand the pasta. I swallowed it quickly and washed it down with my beer.
“Okay, fuck it,” I said, picking up one of the lobster legs from his plate and cracking it open. I picked up the little fork and began to pull the meat out, making a small pile on the edge of Jaime’s plate for myself.
Jaime leaned towards me as I wiped my hands on my napkin before going to eat the meat I had just pulled out of the lobster. He placed his hand back on my thigh, just like he did in the car. His thumb traced over the skin that was showing on the slit of my leggings that was highest up on my thigh. He rested his lips against the side of my ear, making sure I could feel them against my skin as he spoke. “I knew you couldn’t resist,” he whispered. His breath was warm against my skin, the air tickling my ear, but not enough to make me squirm. I knew that we were talking about lobster, mostly, but he was right. I couldn’t resist. I placed my hand over his, curling my fingers under so my palm was resting on the top of his hand and my fingers were holding onto the side of his thumb, my fingertips reaching the middle of his palm. He curled his own fingers under so he could return the embrace. It was an interesting way of holding hands, but it was intimate, and different, and I liked it.
For the rest of the dinner, Jaime’s hand remained on my thigh. We ate like nothing was any different. Like his hand on my thigh was a normal thing - like it was an expected behavior. He removed his hand after the bill had been taken care of and my pasta was packaged in a to-go box since I ate all of Jaime’s food instead of my own. We all walked through the restaurant together. Mike, Alysha, Tony, and Ashlynn were all buzzing pretty hard from the drinks they had throughout the night. I was only feeling slightly warm from the one beer that I drank, which was odd. Usually I was the one who was drinking every chance I got. But for once I felt that I didn’t need to numb myself over for the night.
We exited the restaurant and stared out at the desolate parking lot. The street lamps were turning off, one by one, starting at the end of the parking lot, up to where we were standing. The only light left was the glow from the valet booth to our right.
“Holy shit, it’s fucking dark,” Mike commented, his tone filled with both wonder and fear.
“It gives me the creeps,” Alysha said with a shiver, leaning into Mike’s side for warmth.
Ashlynn nodded, shivering as well. “This is like some horror movie shit,” Ashlynn said, her breath visible in the chilly night air. “I hate the dark.”
Tony suddenly jumped forward so he was standing in the darkness, his figure just barely recognizable in the little amount of light that reached the beginning of the parking lot. “The dark doesn’t bother me,” he exclaimed, his voice deep and his words pronounced with precision to insinuate purpose and importance. “They call me,” he paused and we could hear his feet moving around on the pavement, his blob of a figure doing some sort of pose. He spoke up again, this time his voice was a lot louder and deeper than before as he bellowed out his name: “NIGHTHAWK!”
The group immediately broke out into a laugh at Tony’s drunken behavior. I couldn’t laugh along with them, though. I was frozen at the familiarity of the name. Nighthawk.
“Okay, it’s actually really scary in the dark,” he whimpered, walking back into the light and immediately finding his place back beside Ashlynn.
“Okay, Nighthawk,” Ashlynn said with an eyeroll, “get in the car.”
Right on time, the valet brought around Jaime’s car. Ashlynn helped Tony crawl into the back, each of them giggling as Tony kept talking out of his ass about who-knows-what. Jaime and I said our goodbyes to Vic, Danielle, Alysha, and Mike. Each of them giving us big hugs and promising that we would have to get together soon - Danielle mentioned something about a girl’s day out in the city, to which Ashlynn let out a ‘woo’ from the backseat, but I just nodded, my mind piecing everything together as I stepped into the passenger seat.
Jaime turned the heater on full-blast and turned the radio up a bit. “Hey,” he said, just loud enough for me to hear.
I turned to look at him, my face expressionless, my mouth not working.
“You, um,” Jaime stuttered a bit, letting out an awkward laugh. “You’re just really beautiful, you know that, right?”
I didn’t know what to do, so I just cracked a lopsided smile, just enough to tell him that I was accepting his compliment. Meanwhile, Tony and Ashlynn were whispering back and forth rather quickly - obviously engaged in a deep conversation, a giggle randomly breaking their conversation after Tony said something to make Ashlynn laugh.
Jaime placed his hand back on my thigh; his hand pushing his way under one of the larger slits on my leggings so his palm was flush against my skin. He rubbed up my thigh a bit, careful not to rip my leggings any more than they already were. “I really want to kiss you, but I know that you don’t want to kiss me back,” he whispered. He stared straight out the windshield, focussing on the road as he drove back toward my apartment.
“Maybe I do,” I responded, my heart immediately beating out of control.
I heard Ashlynn laugh in the back, along with a slap as she hit Tony’s arm, her face shocked at whatever he had said.
What the hell was happening?
“I’m going to hold you to that,” Jaime muttered, a smile taking over his entire face.
I closed my eyes and let out a shaky breath. I felt the urge to cry, but I swallowed it down along with any sense of anxiety or fear that I was experiencing in that moment. I wanted to kiss Jaime. I wanted to do more than kiss Jaime. I knew that I couldn’t though. I knew that would be wrong. I opened my eyes and looked down at the tan line on my ring finger. The white sliver of where my engagement ring had once laid was fading away - the only reason I could notice it was because I knew that it was there. I closed my eyes once more and rolled my bottom lip between my teeth. While keeping my eyes closed, I spoke: “Sleepover?”
Jaime’s breath hitched in his throat for a second. I knew we each had the same thing on our minds, and I could sense how badly Jaime wanted to say yes. But still, he had to be the good boy. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
I knew that it wasn’t a good idea. It was a terrible idea, actually. But it felt right. I looked over to Jaime, my eyes staring right at his face even though he couldn’t look back at me. I knew that he could feel my gaze on him. He left leg began to bounce a bit as his nerves kicked in. “Please,” I muttered. I hated that I sounded so desperate, and that I was practically begging him to spend the night, but I needed him.
Jaime didn’t say anything in return. He reached out and turned down the radio as we pulled up to a stop sign. “Tone, looks let there’s a change in plans. I’m going to drop you off at home because I’m going to actually go back to the girls’ apartment.”
“I’m not invited to the slumber party?” he asked. He sat up and put his head right in between us so we could see the ridiculous pout on his face. He plump bottom lip was pushed out and his eyebrows were so furrowed that that his eyes were closed from the wrinkles. “I can sleep on the couch,” he said. “Pwetty pwease?”
I looked back at Ashlynn, but she wasn’t paying much attention. She was slumped over in her seat, her forehead resting against the window as she struggled to stay awake. She hiccuped a couple of times while I stared at her, and then went ahead and chuckled silently to herself. She was drunk.
“That’s a good idea,” Jaime said. “That way I don’t have to turn all the way around to take him home.”
I was in a bind. I wouldn’t usually care if Tony crashed at my house, but now I wasn’t so sure. Jaime answered for me though. He continued off in the direction of my apartment, and I didn’t really have a say in the matter anymore.
It was a struggle getting Ashlynn and Tony up the stairs. Tony was dead weight by the time we reached the third step, and luckily Ashlynn sobered up enough to try and make her own way up the stairs. It took a while, but we managed to get them up and keep them silent so the neighbors weren’t disturbed. The last thing I wanted was one of my elder neighbors calling the leasing office and complaining, again.
We went ahead and dropped Tony on the couch the second we got him inside. I lazily tossed a blanket over him, not really bothering to cover him up since he had been snoring since we came through the door. Ashlynn stumbled into her bedroom and shut the door after her right away, too drunk to even say goodnight to us.
Jaime and I stood in the living room, staring at each other for a moment, before we started making our way over to my bedroom. My fingertips were freezing and the rest of my hands were clammy as my nerves started to kick in. I could feel my body slightly shaking as I stepped inside my room. Jaime walked in behind me. I stood still, facing the bed, my eyes wide open and my mouth slightly agape as my breathing was already accelerated. I listed as Jaime shut the door, the sound of the lock clicking followed a few seconds after. I could feel him coming towards me in the room. He stood behind me, our bodies just barely touching.
I let out an unstable breath as Jaime grabbed the bottom of the shirt I was wearing and pulled it over my head. He pushed the hair off of my left shoulder, my head immediately moving to the side to give him access to my neck. He bent down and gently placed his warm lips against my shoulder, slowly making his way over toward my neck. He stopped, a bit too soon, and exhaled, a slight chuckle mixed in with the breath.
“Relax,” he said, his breath hitting my skin. I nodded and allowed his lips to travel over my skin, progressively allowing me to relax into his touch and give in to the feeling. Jaime’s hands were all over me, his hands constantly tracing their way down my bare torso and over the rips in my leggings as he continued to kiss me from behind. He turned me around and traced his hands over my face for a moment as he stared over my features.
“You’re so beautiful, Delaney,” he whispered, his eyes staring straight into mine. He opened his mouth to say something else, but I stopped him. My heart was already beating out of control. I couldn’t stand to hear whatever he was about to say.
He smiled weakly, as if we had just made some sort of silent agreement that we weren’t going to talk anymore. We made our way over to the bed - he laid me down on my back and kneeled between my legs, wrapping them around his waist. He leaned down to kiss me, but stopped, remembering that I had been wearing lipstick. He bit his bottom lip as he brought his right hand up to my face, using his thumb to rub most of the pigment away from my lips. He wiped his thumb on his jeans and then leaned down, putting all of his weight on me.
I reached up and placed my hands on both sides of my face to bring him closer to me. I traced my thumbs over the sides of his cheeks, feeling his smooth skin against my own. It had been far too long since I had been in a moment like this with Jaime, and although we had been best friends for years after we broke up, I never felt more connected to him than I did that moment where my hands were holding his sweet face that displayed a loving smile as he looked down at me, his eyelashes gracefully hitting the tops of his cheeks every time he blinked.
I bit my bottom lip as my eyes looked over his lips. It had been so long since we had kissed. We had been so good up to this point. We were able to be best friends without having the urge to kiss or have sex, but now everything was different. He was all I wanted, and I didn’t care if we were still technically best friends, I needed to feel his lips covering mine.
I closed my eyes to blink, and before I could open them again, in that brief second, Jaime crashed his lips onto mine, pushing them together with so much force that my head was pushed back into the pillows for a second. I pushed back immediately, as if our lips weren’t touching enough, and we just kind of sat like that for a minute. Our lips touching, the breath from our noses exchanging, and our bodies pushed up against each other. I couldn’t stand it anymore. I pulled away just enough so I could trace my tongue over his lips. He parted his lips a bit, expecting me to take the kiss to the next level, but instead I pulled away even more. I let out a deep breath and inhaled before I took his bottom lip between my teeth, gently pulling his lip out until I heard him moan. I couldn’t keep up with the teasing anymore, and I could tell that Jaime didn’t want to deal with any of it either. He pushed his lips against mine, his tongue pushing its way into my mouth, forcing mine to join his.
Our breathing was loud in the room - that mixed with the sounds of our bodies shifting on the sheets filled the room, but it wasn’t loud enough for anybody else in the apartment to hear. Jaime’s hands reached around me sometime while we were kissing and I didn’t even notice that he had removed my bra until he flipped us over so I was on top, sitting on his thighs as he pulled his own shirt over his head. I looked down at him and took in his appearance. Not too much had changed since the last time I had seen him like this. Sure, I had seen him with his shirt off at the beach and by the pool, but seeing him take off his shirt while he was underneath me came with a whole different look.
He wasn’t ripped, or even really toned that much, he was just normal Jaime. His belly wasn’t as prominent as it was when we were younger, and he had a small happy trail that drew my eyes downward. I could feel him staring over me as well, and in that moment, things changed.
This was Jaime who was laying beneath me. I was straddling Jaime. My best friend. I wanted him so badly in that moment, but what would happen in the moments after? The next morning? What about when Nathan returned?
Nathan. I was with Nathan. Even though he had taken that ring back with him and paused our engagement, I was still technically engaged to him. What was I doing?
I looked away from Jaime - I couldn’t look down at him anymore. I couldn’t straddle him anymore. I couldn’t do this. I lifted my leg over his body and collapsed on the left side of the bed, face first. I groaned into the pillow, frustration was coursing through my veins - I didn’t know if it was just sexual frustration, or everything in general. Nathan, Tony, Ashlynn, and now Jaime. Everything was so confusing.
Jaime let out a small laugh as he adjusted himself so he was laying on his side, his elbow bent and his palm supporting his head so he could look at me more clearly. He reached out and gently played with a strand of my hair. He stopped and I felt him shift again. When he returned back to his spot on the bed, he cleared his throat to get my attention.
“Here,” he said, holding a t-shirt out for me. “This was on the floor by the bed. I would have gotten you a clean one, but I don’t want to get up.”
I laughed a bit and accepted the shirt. It was the shirt that I had slept in from the night before, but that didn’t matter. I pulled it over my head and went ahead and left my leggings on, not really caring if I slept in them or not. “I’m sorry,” I muttered, more into the pillow than to Jaime.
“It’s okay,” he said through a breath. “I know.”
He went back to playing with my hair for a while until he started to yawn. He crawled under the blankets, kissed the side of my head, and then rolled over onto his other side.
I remained still for a long while, not really thinking about too much. I wasn’t tired, but I didn’t want to get up. I just remained still and listened to the silence of the apartment as it rang in my ears.
The silence was broken after an hour or so, and I heard Tony groan from the living room. I chuckled to myself as I heard him mutter something to himself, but the comedy ended when I heard his footsteps nearing the hallway.
Please just be going to the bathroom, I thought to myself as I listened. He walked right past the bathroom though, and instead he was standing right in between mine and Ashlynn’s doors. I listened as he turned the handle to her room and whispered her name. The door shut behind him before I could hear anything else, though.
I leaned over the side of my bed and grabbed my purse from off the floor and pulled my phone out. I needed to preoccupy myself from whatever was going to happen between Tony and Ashlynn. I needed to stop being so obsessed. But I just couldn’t help it, nothing made sense to me and I hated not knowing what was going on in my own house.
I clicked the home button, and before I could even unlock my phone I was met with my text message from earlier. Nathan. He had texted me when we were at dinner and I hadn’t even bothered to read the preview of the message that was displayed on the screen. I unlocked my phone, opened up my messages, swiped his name and clicked delete before I could even think twice about the act. Why did I need Nathan when I had Jaime here? How could Nathan just leave me behind?
Nathan was my world for so long, and now what was he? He was just a deleted text message now. A faded tan line of where an engagement ring used to be. He was nothing.
I knew better than to allow myself to think about him too much, though. I knew better than to dwell over my shitty relationship. I couldn’t stop that rage that was coursing through my veins, though. I couldn’t help the anger that Nathan made me feel. I wanted to erase him from my mind, and I felt like the only way to do that was to erase him from my life. I couldn’t do that, not entirely, but I knew I wanted to give it a shot. Anything to put me at peace for the night.
I opened up my camera roll on my phone with intentions of deleting any picture of Nathan that I could find, but as soon as the app opened, I was met with a picture of my hair from when Ashlynn had braided it for me. I cracked a small smile at the memory of us sitting on the bed and actually talking.
My hair looked so great in the picture. I suddenly remembered how I wanted to upload it onto instagram and decided to do it then, that way I wouldn’t delete any pictures of Nathan that I might want later on. My mind worked is ridiculous ways, but in the end I managed to find a distraction. I logged into the app and looked at my profile before doing anything else. I only had four pictures uploaded: the first one was of my old beta fish, the second one was of Vic holding up a plate of tacos while we were out at a lunch date, the third was a group photo of me with the boys, all of them pointing at the Pierce the Veil shirt I had worn to one of their local shows, and the fourth was of Jaime holding a bottle of tequila up in the air, a stream of liquor missing his mouth and soaking his shirt instead. I chuckled at the pictures and the memories that came along with them. Each photo has a ridiculous amount of likes and comments since Jaime and the boys used to tag me in all kinds of stuff, and especially since the fans knew that I used to date Jaime.
I was only following twenty-two people, though; four of them being the boys. I went to my news feed and was immediately met with a picture that Mike and Alysha had taken of themselves while we were out to dinner. I liked the photo and continued to scroll down my feed. The only pictures I really saw were the ones that Vic and Mike had posted, though. There was occasionally one from Jaime, but I hadn’t seen one from Tony, yet. I scrolled down until I finally saw Tony’s name on the screen. But the picture was not what I was expecting.
It was a picture of Ashlynn taking a picture of a plate of food that was in front of her. The caption read: “Always got to get that instagram photo before I take a bite” - @AshAdela #quoteoftheday. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. There was no way. I clicked on Tony’s name and browsed over a few of his most recent photos. Ashlynn was tagged in almost every other photo. They had started their own little tradition. He would post a picture of her doing something and then the caption would be of a quote by her, followed by the hastag “quote of the day”.
It all made sense. All of those times that she had left, she was with Tony. Everything matched up. On the day that she said she was going to the grocery store, there was a picture of her posted on Tony’s instagram. On the day that she had went to fill out paperwork her job, there was a picture of her on his instagram. Did she even really go to her work? Or did she go straight to seeing Tony? How did she even know Tony well enough to go hang out with him? They had only been introduced once. It was only her second or third day of being back in San Diego and she was already out with Tony.
That day where we had done each other’s hair, Ashlynn got a text message from Nighthawk. Nighthawk. Tony was Nighthawk.
I heard Ashlynn’s bedroom door open and someone walked out and into the bathroom. The footsteps were light, so I knew that it couldn’t be Tony. It had to be Ashlynn exiting the room. I got out of bed as carefully as I could so I didn’t wake Jaime, and silently ran to my own door, pulling it open and then quickly pulling it shut behind me, but slowing down just enough to make sure it didn’t make a loud noise when it shut again. Ashlynn was making her way into the bathroom and I followed after her, stopping the door just before she could shut it all the way.
“Delly?” she asked through a yawn. “Did you need to use the bathroom?” she asked as she rubbed her left eye with the side of her hand.
“I know Tony is in your room,” I blurted out, not really know where I was going with this.
Ashlynn immediately woke up a bit more, her eyes focussing in on my face so she could pay more attention. She furrowed her eyebrows and let out a breath - getting ready to feed me some bullshit excuse as to why he was in there. “Oh, he just-”
“Stop,” I said, cutting her off. My breath was barely even a whisper. I was so fed up with the lies and excuses.
“What is up with you?” she asked, taking a slight step back and giving me a confused look. Her expression was soft, but unreadable.
I looked down at my phone. Tony’s instagram was pulled up and you could clearly see her face in several of the preview tiles on the screen. I held the phone up and pushed it toward her face. “Confess.”
Ashlynn cooked an amazing breakfast for Mike and I, and that only added to my suspicions about her. I felt like she was sucking up to me for some reason - as if she was trying to distract me with perfectly cooked pancakes and an expertly folded omelette. Even though I was aware of this, it still worked. I was completely preoccupied for most of the morning. My thoughts strayed away from the thought of Ashlynn’s secrecy and instead I focussed on cleaning my bedroom and taking out the trash. It wasn’t until I exited the shower and heard Ashlynn’s footsteps walking through the kitchen that I remembered everything Mike had been telling me the night before.
After putting on some comfortable clothes, I twisted my hair up into a towel so it could dry and then exited my bedroom - careful not to make it too obvious that I was trying to see what Ash was up to. She was standing in the kitchen with her phone grasped in between her hands, her thumbs tapping away at the screen and a small smile playing on her lips. I looked her over and noticed that her shoes were on and her purse was hanging from her shoulder.
“Hey,” I said, casually. I chuckled as she jumped a bit at my words. I watched as she quickly put her phone in her purse and then turned to face me.
“You scared me,” she said with a smile.
I smiled back and wondered if I even needed to ask the question that was on my mind. I was certain that she knew exactly what I was going to ask her. I could see the guilty look on her face.
“I’m heading out,” she said, half-answering the question that was playing on my mind.
I decided to not even ask her where she was going or who she was going to see. I was sick of her excuses, and although I wanted to call her out on her poor lying skills, I figured I should just leave it alone. She was an adult, and she had clearly changed since she had moved away from San Diego. If she didn’t want to have an open, honest relationship with me, then so be it. I had to learn to accept the fact that maybe she wanted to keep things to herself. Plus, I was guilty of doing the same thing to more people than just my family.
I thought about Jaime for a second and then remembered that the boys wanted to head out tonight. “Ash!” I called out as she began to walk away. She stopped walking and turned around. “Hey, don’t forget that tonight we’re all going out. I really want you to join us. I mean, if you want to.”
She gave me a warm smile and her features softened when she realized that I wasn’t going to interrogate her. “I’d love to go. Just text me and tell me what time.”
I smiled in return and gave her a small nod before I watched her walk away, shutting the door behind her. She walked passed the front window, her phone already back in her hands as she selected a number and put it up to her ear. She disappeared from my sight and I just continued to stare out the window, not really looking at anything or thinking about anything. Just staring.
My phone began to ring from my bedroom and I ran over to it, picking it up right before the final ring.
I slid my finger across the screen as I stared at the caller ID picture. Jaime.
Before I could even say anything, he spoke up.
“Hey, can you let me in?”
I walked back out to the living room and saw him standing in front of the window. A huge smile was spread across his face as he frantically waved at me. He pointed at the door and then back at me, as if I couldn’t hear what he had said on the phone. I rolled my eyes, held the phone up so he could clearly see the screen, and hit the end button. He mocked a face of hurt and surprise, his hand that he was waving was clutching his heart as he stumbled back a few steps.
As I made my way across the living room, my stomach felt funny. I felt nervous and almost wanted to turn around and not let him in just so I could avoid the anxious feeling that was tickling my stomach. I took in a few shaky breaths and pulled the door open before I could back out.
Jaime’s cologne instantly filled my nose and I felt the nervous feeling return again, even stronger than it had been just a few seconds prior. I looked at his smiling face for only a moment before I had to look away. I used to get so lost in his dark eyes and dimply smile. I couldn’t stand to look at him. All I kept thinking about was how he had pinned me to the door a couple nights ago and how much I had liked it.
**
Ashlynn came home with just enough time to change her clothes before we headed out. Vic was the one in charge of all the plans, as usual, and he wanted to do something a little bit different than what we normally did. We would usually just meet up at our usual bar and drink until we couldn’t form proper sentences anymore, but tonight Vic wanted us to go out to dinner - all of us. I was excited for a nice dinner, especially since Jaime had already insisted on picking up my tab since he knew I was low on money. I wanted to fight him on it, but he really wanted me to go. And of course he was such a gentleman that he insisted on paying for Ashlynn’s, too. Even though she could probably afford it on her own. He even offered to be our designated driver so we could have a few fancy drinks while out to dinner.
Jaime was outside, honking the horn, right at seven o’clock. As soon as I heard him honking the horn - much more than necessary, might I add - Ashlynn and I hurried out the front door. I made sure to lock it and then shoved my keys in my purse before we walked down the stairs. He pulled up right beside the staircase so we didn’t have to walk across the parking lot - another act of chivalry on his part. As soon as I approached the car, Jaime was at my side. He pulled open the backseat door for Ashlynn and then pulled the passenger door open for me, a smug smile on his face.
Ashlynn climbed in, muttering a shy thank you, before he shut the door for her. But I just stood there, my arms crossed over my chest as I stared at him with narrowed eyes.
“What?” Jaime asked with a smirk on his face. He had a knowing look in his eyes mixed with what looked like determination. He wouldn’t look me dead in the eyes for long, though. He looked away as soon as he saw me searching his eyes.
“What are you up to, Preciado?” I questioned, leaning in just a bit and narrowing my eyes a tiny bit more to try and see if I could notice anything that would give him away. He was acting differently ever since that night that he had come on to me, and I wanted to know what he was doing, because he clearly had a motive in mind, and I was afraid to guess what it might be.
“Oh no, she’s calling me by my last name,” Jaime cringed as he spoke up, his voice louder than it needed to be for our conversation.
“What did you do now?” a voice called out from the backseat.
I poked my head into the vehicle and saw Tony sitting in the backseat. When he saw me he smiled and gave me a small wave. “Hey, Delly,” he greeted. “How are you?”
“Oh, hey, Tone. I didn’t know you were back there,” I said. “I’m alright, thanks. You?”
“I’m great, actually,” he said with a large grin as something seemed to pop into his mind.
I quickly looked over to Ashlynn, careful not to move my head and make my gaze obvious, and checked to see what her reaction was. If what Mike said was true, then could it be Ashlynn that was making Tony so happy? Just before Ashlynn moved back, Tony was angry and short with everyone and looking to get laid. His mood was immediately better the next day, and I just assumed that he had gotten laid, but maybe-
“Delly, are you going to get in the damn car? What the heck are you doing?” Jaime asked from behind me, causing me to break my thoughts and turn around so I could sit down in the seat. Jaime shut the door for me and then made his way around to the driver’s side so he could get in the car and bring us to downtown San Diego so we could meet up with everybody else for dinner.
The restaurant we were heading to was fancier than what I was used to, but from my understanding, it wasn’t anything too ‘hollywood’, as I liked to put it. It was about a thirty minute drive from my apartment to the restaurant. It would be a shorter drive, but the city traffic in Downtown San Diego added on an extra fifteen minutes to the journey.
Jaime was quiet as he drove, but his smile was still lingering on his lips. It was slowly fading, but probably only because his cheeks were getting sore. His eyes were still bright and happy, even when the smile was nearly gone from his lips.
Tony and Ashlynn were casually chatting in the backseat - their conversation was drown out by the sound of the air conditioning and music from the radio, so I couldn’t eavesdrop. I shook my head, trying to rid my mind of the motives I had for the night. I was becoming too obsessed with the Tony-Ashlynn rumor that Mike had fed me. Because that’s all it had to be - a rumor. They had just met. How would they be sneaking around right beneath our noses? But then it made me wonder: what if I was the only one who didn’t know? Mike seemed to have some sort of knowledge that was driving his ideas - something that was making him believe so strongly in something that we’ve never actually seen.
But what if he had seen something?
“Delly-boooo,” Jaime sang, dragging out the ending of my nickname. He reached over and gently squeezed my thigh, leaving his hand there once he had already gotten my attention. “You okay?” He turned to look at me as we pulled up to the stoplight that we had been inching towards for the past ten minutes, finally reaching the front of the line of cars, just to be stopped at the red light.
I stared at his hand, not even bothering to answer. I didn’t even think I could answer him if I wanted to. My thigh was tingling from his touch, sending internal shivers up my spine as my skin broke out in goosebumps. This feeling was all too familiar. This was a feeling that only Jaime could give me. This was a feeling that reminded me of how much I had been longing for an affectionate touch - not just from anybody, not even Nathan. Only Jaime.
Jaime lifted his hand and placed it back on the wheel as the light finally turned green, leaving my thigh feeling as if it was exposed more than my ripped leggings allowed. His hand on my leg was such a simple gesture, but to me it felt like I had been missing something and when he placed his hand on my thigh, that something was back, and I was complete again.
“We’re here!” Jaime cheered as we pulled up to the valet parking. He handed the keys to the valet along with a cash deposit to pay for the parking as the rest of us got out of the car. I watched as Tony helped Ashlynn step out of the vehicle by gently holding her right hand.
“Can you hold this for a second?” she asked him, holding out the striped clutch that she was carrying. Tony nodded and grabbed the purse as Ash took her hand back from his grasp and straightened out her skirt in the back to make sure it was covering everything that needed to be covered.
I jumped as a hand gently slid around the small of my back. For a moment I was unsure of who it was, but by the way he rested his palm on my hip and gently held onto my side, his fingers curled up just a bit so he could grasp some of the fabric of my shirt in his hands, I knew it was Jaime. It was how he used to hold me back when we dated. It was his way of claiming me when we were at the bar, or at parties, and it was his way of telling me that he was by my side, no matter what. And here he was, even after a break-up and an engagement, still by my side.
Mike and Vic got there before we did and went ahead and got a table. The waiter led us to the back of the restaurant, passed the tanks of fresh lobster and the beer brewery that made the restaurant’s signature beverage. The floors were spotless and the chairs to all the tables were made of dark wood, with no chips or signs of usage at all. This was definitely close to what I imagined a ‘hollywood’ restaurant to be, and I almost felt underdressed. But when the table came into view and I saw Mike and Vic each wearing backwards snapbacks, I didn’t feel so underdressed anymore.
They stood up to greet us, each of them walking around the table to give everybody a hug. As I hugged Mike, I noticed two girls standing just beside the table. One of them was just barely getting out of her seat, whispering something to the other girl as they both adjusted their clothing.
“Which one is yours?” I whispered into Mike’s ear. Before he could answer, I made my own prediction on which one was probably with Mike. I recognized her instantly - her short, blonde hair was curled and her makeup was simple but flawless. She was wearing a crop top with high-waisted shorts and a large, over-sized jacket to cover herself up a bit. “Is that her?” I asked, my eyes staring over her tattoos as she shyly made her way over.
Mike didn’t even need to look at who I was referring to. He nodded and pulled away, instantly turning and placing his hand on the blonde’s shoulder, guiding her over to where we were standing. “Delaney, this is Alysha,” he said. “Alysha, this is Delaney, the one I was telling you about.”
“Oh no, what did you tell her?” I joked, shaking my head as I reached my left hand out to meet her for a handshake. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”
Her face lit up when I said the word finally, as if she was excited to hear that Mike had been talking about her to me. Even though he didn’t give me specifics about her, he did make it clear that he had strong feelings for her.
She opened her mouth to say something in return, but instead Vic spoke up, all of us instantly turning our heads back toward the table where he was standing with his arm wrapped around the waist of a red-headed girl that I had never seen before.
“Guys, this is my girlfriend,” he said, pausing to give her a warm smile, “Danielle.”
I almost blurted out, ‘since when do you have a girlfriend?’, but decided to hold my tongue. I didn’t want to sound rude and make Danielle feel awkward or maybe even hurt that Vic had never mentioned her.
“Danielle, this is Delaney, and that is her cousin Ashlynn,” he said, pointing each of us out. “And you know the guys.”
I felt hurt that Vic had introduced his girlfriend to the guys and never even mentioned her to me. Vic and I weren’t the closest out of the bunch, I had always been around Jaime and Tony the most, and Mike just kind of weaseled his way into my life, but Vic seemed to be the most disconnected from us all. Maybe it was because he was busy being the frontman of the band, or because he had a secret girlfriend that everybody but me knew about - either way, I felt like I hardly even knew Vic anymore.
We all took our seats around the circular table and I somehow ended up sitting in between Alysha and Jaime. I didn’t mind sitting next to them, but I felt like I had abandoned Ashlynn. She hardly knew the guys and yet she was seated across the table from me with Tony on her right and Vic on her left.
“I went ahead and ordered a round of the house brew for everyone, I hope that’s okay,” Mike announced to the table. “The tab is on us tonight,” he said, motioning between Vic and himself.
“No way,” Jaime spoke up right away. “I can’t let you guys do that. That’s way too much money.”
“Oh come on, Himes,” Vic said. “It’s not like we can’t afford it. Seriously, it’s fine. We already talked about it and we want to pay for you guys.”
“If you insist,” I muttered to myself, earning a stifled laugh from Alysha. “I wasn’t going to pay anyways,” I whispered to her as I pointed a finger over to Jaime to tell her that he was going to pay.
“Mike never told me that you two were together,” she said. “But I’m actually not surprised. You guys fit.”
“Oh,” I said, a heavy breath escaping my lips. “Um, we’re not together...anymore.”
“Oh,” she said, her cheeks turning red and her eyebrows furrowing. “Sorry, Mike mentioned that you were engaged and I just assumed...I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed.”
I waved my hand in the air, dismissing her apology because it wasn’t necessary. “Ain’t nothin’ but a thang,” I said, casually turning my attention to the menu in front of me.
“Hey!” Jaime spoke up, butting his way into our conversation. “That’s my phrase!”
“You bet your buns it is,” I said, stealing another one of his phrases. I gave him a goofy smile, making sure to puff out my cheeks and make a duck-bill with my lips.
“Only you can make a duck-face look cute,” Jaime said, chuckling to himself. I instantly changed my expression, feeling suddenly shy as he complimented me so openly at the table. I could feel Mike staring at me, probably wanting to catch my gaze so he could ask me about Jaime’s comment, but I kept my head down and bit the inside of my cheek to hide the smile that was trying to show.
I picked one of the less expensive meals on the menu, not wanting to take full advantage of my wealthy, and generous, friends. If it was only Jaime paying for my meal, I wouldn’t have cared so much. But since Mike and Vic were taking on the entire bill, I decided to hold back, even though the lobster feast was calling my name.
We went around the table, taking turns with our orders, and when it came to my turn, I recited my order: “I’ll have the baked ziti with chicken. But can I get the chicken cut into chunks instead of strips?”
The waitress nodded and then collected my menu, turning her attention to Jaime to get his order. “I’ll have the lobster feast with extra butter on the side please. Oh, and can I get two of the the baby forks?”
The waitress chuckled. “The lobster forks?” she corrected. “Sure thing.”
I sighed as Jaime handed his menu over, wishing that I could have gotten that damn lobster feast.
After the waitress left, Vic immediately started to babble on about their upcoming tour. They only had a couple months to prepare for the tour and of course Vic, being the over-prepared little man that he is, already was trying to figure out the setlist. Jaime and Tony kept turning all of his suggestions down until Vic had literally listed every song they’ve ever recorded. Vic stopped for a moment, and then finally caught on to their scam. “Real funny, you guys. Way to be mature.” He rolled his eyes, getting a little frustrated. I watched as Danielle placed one hand on his shoulder as her other hand made circles around his back to calm him down.
The conversation was light, each topic not lasting much longer than two minutes before someone jumped on to something new to discuss. I wasn’t participating in the conversation much, I was too busy watching how Ashlynn seemed to be so comfortable as she helped carry on each of the topics. She wasn’t an extremely shy person, but the last couple of times she had hung out with the boys, the conversations never involved her too much. Not like this. She was smiling and adding her own personal anecdotes and laughing along with everybody as if she had been a part of the group for years. I was glad that she was feeling accepted and comfortable, but I couldn't help but wonder if it was Tony that was making her feel that why.
I groaned and put my hands on my head, looking down at my lap and taking a couple of deep breaths to calm myself down. Why was I getting so worked up over this? Why did I care so much?
I released my head and looked back up at the table. Nobody had noticed my frustration, or if they did, they didn't question it at all. As if right on cue, my phone vibrated from inside my purse that was sitting on the table. Jaime looked over to me for a brief second while in the middle of telling a story I had probably already heard, but then looked back to the rest of the table when he saw me reaching for my phone. I pulled my iPhone out of my purse and stared at the name on the screen that showed up beside the green iMessage icon. I could see a preview of his text message sitting on my screen, but I didn’t want to read them.
“Who was it…Oh,” Jaime asked as he looked over my shoulder, reading the name on the screen. “Hey Del-”
I smacked his arm as he began to read the text message out loud to himself. “Shush,” I hissed, smacking his arm once more just for emphasis. “I don’t want to read it yet.” I shoved the phone back into my purse and then hooked it along the edge of my chair so the vibrations of new text messages wouldn’t bother me.
Our food arrived and I couldn’t help but drool over the giant mound of lobster legs that Jaime had in front of him. Mike got the same thing for him and Alysha to share. Everyone around me had it and I was stuck with the stupid baked ziti pasta with chicken.
“Here,” Jaime muttered, placing one of the lobster forks on my napkin along with a small cup of the melted butter to dip the lobster meat in. “I saw you staring at it on the menu. You practically moaning as you looked at it.”
“Jaime, this is your meal. I have mine. I’m not going to eat yours. I can’t.” I shook my head, but my eyes remained fixated on his plate.
“Please shut up,” Jaime groaned, rolling his eyes.
I gave him a shocked expression, my mouth open and my eyebrows furrowed. “Dang, Mr. Sassy Pants,” I said, staring at him in disbelief. “Rude.”
He chuckled a bit, but then saw that I was actually going to decline his offer for sharing his food. I picked up my fork and stabbed one of my noodles, making sure to get a piece of chicken with it. I shoved it into my mouth, staring at him as I chewed on my pasta. I tried to convince myself that I was eating lobster, but with the smell of the real lobster in my nose, I just couldn’t stand the pasta. I swallowed it quickly and washed it down with my beer.
“Okay, fuck it,” I said, picking up one of the lobster legs from his plate and cracking it open. I picked up the little fork and began to pull the meat out, making a small pile on the edge of Jaime’s plate for myself.
Jaime leaned towards me as I wiped my hands on my napkin before going to eat the meat I had just pulled out of the lobster. He placed his hand back on my thigh, just like he did in the car. His thumb traced over the skin that was showing on the slit of my leggings that was highest up on my thigh. He rested his lips against the side of my ear, making sure I could feel them against my skin as he spoke. “I knew you couldn’t resist,” he whispered. His breath was warm against my skin, the air tickling my ear, but not enough to make me squirm. I knew that we were talking about lobster, mostly, but he was right. I couldn’t resist. I placed my hand over his, curling my fingers under so my palm was resting on the top of his hand and my fingers were holding onto the side of his thumb, my fingertips reaching the middle of his palm. He curled his own fingers under so he could return the embrace. It was an interesting way of holding hands, but it was intimate, and different, and I liked it.
For the rest of the dinner, Jaime’s hand remained on my thigh. We ate like nothing was any different. Like his hand on my thigh was a normal thing - like it was an expected behavior. He removed his hand after the bill had been taken care of and my pasta was packaged in a to-go box since I ate all of Jaime’s food instead of my own. We all walked through the restaurant together. Mike, Alysha, Tony, and Ashlynn were all buzzing pretty hard from the drinks they had throughout the night. I was only feeling slightly warm from the one beer that I drank, which was odd. Usually I was the one who was drinking every chance I got. But for once I felt that I didn’t need to numb myself over for the night.
We exited the restaurant and stared out at the desolate parking lot. The street lamps were turning off, one by one, starting at the end of the parking lot, up to where we were standing. The only light left was the glow from the valet booth to our right.
“Holy shit, it’s fucking dark,” Mike commented, his tone filled with both wonder and fear.
“It gives me the creeps,” Alysha said with a shiver, leaning into Mike’s side for warmth.
Ashlynn nodded, shivering as well. “This is like some horror movie shit,” Ashlynn said, her breath visible in the chilly night air. “I hate the dark.”
Tony suddenly jumped forward so he was standing in the darkness, his figure just barely recognizable in the little amount of light that reached the beginning of the parking lot. “The dark doesn’t bother me,” he exclaimed, his voice deep and his words pronounced with precision to insinuate purpose and importance. “They call me,” he paused and we could hear his feet moving around on the pavement, his blob of a figure doing some sort of pose. He spoke up again, this time his voice was a lot louder and deeper than before as he bellowed out his name: “NIGHTHAWK!”
The group immediately broke out into a laugh at Tony’s drunken behavior. I couldn’t laugh along with them, though. I was frozen at the familiarity of the name. Nighthawk.
“Okay, it’s actually really scary in the dark,” he whimpered, walking back into the light and immediately finding his place back beside Ashlynn.
“Okay, Nighthawk,” Ashlynn said with an eyeroll, “get in the car.”
Right on time, the valet brought around Jaime’s car. Ashlynn helped Tony crawl into the back, each of them giggling as Tony kept talking out of his ass about who-knows-what. Jaime and I said our goodbyes to Vic, Danielle, Alysha, and Mike. Each of them giving us big hugs and promising that we would have to get together soon - Danielle mentioned something about a girl’s day out in the city, to which Ashlynn let out a ‘woo’ from the backseat, but I just nodded, my mind piecing everything together as I stepped into the passenger seat.
Jaime turned the heater on full-blast and turned the radio up a bit. “Hey,” he said, just loud enough for me to hear.
I turned to look at him, my face expressionless, my mouth not working.
“You, um,” Jaime stuttered a bit, letting out an awkward laugh. “You’re just really beautiful, you know that, right?”
I didn’t know what to do, so I just cracked a lopsided smile, just enough to tell him that I was accepting his compliment. Meanwhile, Tony and Ashlynn were whispering back and forth rather quickly - obviously engaged in a deep conversation, a giggle randomly breaking their conversation after Tony said something to make Ashlynn laugh.
Jaime placed his hand back on my thigh; his hand pushing his way under one of the larger slits on my leggings so his palm was flush against my skin. He rubbed up my thigh a bit, careful not to rip my leggings any more than they already were. “I really want to kiss you, but I know that you don’t want to kiss me back,” he whispered. He stared straight out the windshield, focussing on the road as he drove back toward my apartment.
“Maybe I do,” I responded, my heart immediately beating out of control.
I heard Ashlynn laugh in the back, along with a slap as she hit Tony’s arm, her face shocked at whatever he had said.
What the hell was happening?
“I’m going to hold you to that,” Jaime muttered, a smile taking over his entire face.
I closed my eyes and let out a shaky breath. I felt the urge to cry, but I swallowed it down along with any sense of anxiety or fear that I was experiencing in that moment. I wanted to kiss Jaime. I wanted to do more than kiss Jaime. I knew that I couldn’t though. I knew that would be wrong. I opened my eyes and looked down at the tan line on my ring finger. The white sliver of where my engagement ring had once laid was fading away - the only reason I could notice it was because I knew that it was there. I closed my eyes once more and rolled my bottom lip between my teeth. While keeping my eyes closed, I spoke: “Sleepover?”
Jaime’s breath hitched in his throat for a second. I knew we each had the same thing on our minds, and I could sense how badly Jaime wanted to say yes. But still, he had to be the good boy. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
I knew that it wasn’t a good idea. It was a terrible idea, actually. But it felt right. I looked over to Jaime, my eyes staring right at his face even though he couldn’t look back at me. I knew that he could feel my gaze on him. He left leg began to bounce a bit as his nerves kicked in. “Please,” I muttered. I hated that I sounded so desperate, and that I was practically begging him to spend the night, but I needed him.
Jaime didn’t say anything in return. He reached out and turned down the radio as we pulled up to a stop sign. “Tone, looks let there’s a change in plans. I’m going to drop you off at home because I’m going to actually go back to the girls’ apartment.”
“I’m not invited to the slumber party?” he asked. He sat up and put his head right in between us so we could see the ridiculous pout on his face. He plump bottom lip was pushed out and his eyebrows were so furrowed that that his eyes were closed from the wrinkles. “I can sleep on the couch,” he said. “Pwetty pwease?”
I looked back at Ashlynn, but she wasn’t paying much attention. She was slumped over in her seat, her forehead resting against the window as she struggled to stay awake. She hiccuped a couple of times while I stared at her, and then went ahead and chuckled silently to herself. She was drunk.
“That’s a good idea,” Jaime said. “That way I don’t have to turn all the way around to take him home.”
I was in a bind. I wouldn’t usually care if Tony crashed at my house, but now I wasn’t so sure. Jaime answered for me though. He continued off in the direction of my apartment, and I didn’t really have a say in the matter anymore.
It was a struggle getting Ashlynn and Tony up the stairs. Tony was dead weight by the time we reached the third step, and luckily Ashlynn sobered up enough to try and make her own way up the stairs. It took a while, but we managed to get them up and keep them silent so the neighbors weren’t disturbed. The last thing I wanted was one of my elder neighbors calling the leasing office and complaining, again.
We went ahead and dropped Tony on the couch the second we got him inside. I lazily tossed a blanket over him, not really bothering to cover him up since he had been snoring since we came through the door. Ashlynn stumbled into her bedroom and shut the door after her right away, too drunk to even say goodnight to us.
Jaime and I stood in the living room, staring at each other for a moment, before we started making our way over to my bedroom. My fingertips were freezing and the rest of my hands were clammy as my nerves started to kick in. I could feel my body slightly shaking as I stepped inside my room. Jaime walked in behind me. I stood still, facing the bed, my eyes wide open and my mouth slightly agape as my breathing was already accelerated. I listed as Jaime shut the door, the sound of the lock clicking followed a few seconds after. I could feel him coming towards me in the room. He stood behind me, our bodies just barely touching.
I let out an unstable breath as Jaime grabbed the bottom of the shirt I was wearing and pulled it over my head. He pushed the hair off of my left shoulder, my head immediately moving to the side to give him access to my neck. He bent down and gently placed his warm lips against my shoulder, slowly making his way over toward my neck. He stopped, a bit too soon, and exhaled, a slight chuckle mixed in with the breath.
“Relax,” he said, his breath hitting my skin. I nodded and allowed his lips to travel over my skin, progressively allowing me to relax into his touch and give in to the feeling. Jaime’s hands were all over me, his hands constantly tracing their way down my bare torso and over the rips in my leggings as he continued to kiss me from behind. He turned me around and traced his hands over my face for a moment as he stared over my features.
“You’re so beautiful, Delaney,” he whispered, his eyes staring straight into mine. He opened his mouth to say something else, but I stopped him. My heart was already beating out of control. I couldn’t stand to hear whatever he was about to say.
He smiled weakly, as if we had just made some sort of silent agreement that we weren’t going to talk anymore. We made our way over to the bed - he laid me down on my back and kneeled between my legs, wrapping them around his waist. He leaned down to kiss me, but stopped, remembering that I had been wearing lipstick. He bit his bottom lip as he brought his right hand up to my face, using his thumb to rub most of the pigment away from my lips. He wiped his thumb on his jeans and then leaned down, putting all of his weight on me.
I reached up and placed my hands on both sides of my face to bring him closer to me. I traced my thumbs over the sides of his cheeks, feeling his smooth skin against my own. It had been far too long since I had been in a moment like this with Jaime, and although we had been best friends for years after we broke up, I never felt more connected to him than I did that moment where my hands were holding his sweet face that displayed a loving smile as he looked down at me, his eyelashes gracefully hitting the tops of his cheeks every time he blinked.
I bit my bottom lip as my eyes looked over his lips. It had been so long since we had kissed. We had been so good up to this point. We were able to be best friends without having the urge to kiss or have sex, but now everything was different. He was all I wanted, and I didn’t care if we were still technically best friends, I needed to feel his lips covering mine.
I closed my eyes to blink, and before I could open them again, in that brief second, Jaime crashed his lips onto mine, pushing them together with so much force that my head was pushed back into the pillows for a second. I pushed back immediately, as if our lips weren’t touching enough, and we just kind of sat like that for a minute. Our lips touching, the breath from our noses exchanging, and our bodies pushed up against each other. I couldn’t stand it anymore. I pulled away just enough so I could trace my tongue over his lips. He parted his lips a bit, expecting me to take the kiss to the next level, but instead I pulled away even more. I let out a deep breath and inhaled before I took his bottom lip between my teeth, gently pulling his lip out until I heard him moan. I couldn’t keep up with the teasing anymore, and I could tell that Jaime didn’t want to deal with any of it either. He pushed his lips against mine, his tongue pushing its way into my mouth, forcing mine to join his.
Our breathing was loud in the room - that mixed with the sounds of our bodies shifting on the sheets filled the room, but it wasn’t loud enough for anybody else in the apartment to hear. Jaime’s hands reached around me sometime while we were kissing and I didn’t even notice that he had removed my bra until he flipped us over so I was on top, sitting on his thighs as he pulled his own shirt over his head. I looked down at him and took in his appearance. Not too much had changed since the last time I had seen him like this. Sure, I had seen him with his shirt off at the beach and by the pool, but seeing him take off his shirt while he was underneath me came with a whole different look.
He wasn’t ripped, or even really toned that much, he was just normal Jaime. His belly wasn’t as prominent as it was when we were younger, and he had a small happy trail that drew my eyes downward. I could feel him staring over me as well, and in that moment, things changed.
This was Jaime who was laying beneath me. I was straddling Jaime. My best friend. I wanted him so badly in that moment, but what would happen in the moments after? The next morning? What about when Nathan returned?
Nathan. I was with Nathan. Even though he had taken that ring back with him and paused our engagement, I was still technically engaged to him. What was I doing?
I looked away from Jaime - I couldn’t look down at him anymore. I couldn’t straddle him anymore. I couldn’t do this. I lifted my leg over his body and collapsed on the left side of the bed, face first. I groaned into the pillow, frustration was coursing through my veins - I didn’t know if it was just sexual frustration, or everything in general. Nathan, Tony, Ashlynn, and now Jaime. Everything was so confusing.
Jaime let out a small laugh as he adjusted himself so he was laying on his side, his elbow bent and his palm supporting his head so he could look at me more clearly. He reached out and gently played with a strand of my hair. He stopped and I felt him shift again. When he returned back to his spot on the bed, he cleared his throat to get my attention.
“Here,” he said, holding a t-shirt out for me. “This was on the floor by the bed. I would have gotten you a clean one, but I don’t want to get up.”
I laughed a bit and accepted the shirt. It was the shirt that I had slept in from the night before, but that didn’t matter. I pulled it over my head and went ahead and left my leggings on, not really caring if I slept in them or not. “I’m sorry,” I muttered, more into the pillow than to Jaime.
“It’s okay,” he said through a breath. “I know.”
He went back to playing with my hair for a while until he started to yawn. He crawled under the blankets, kissed the side of my head, and then rolled over onto his other side.
I remained still for a long while, not really thinking about too much. I wasn’t tired, but I didn’t want to get up. I just remained still and listened to the silence of the apartment as it rang in my ears.
The silence was broken after an hour or so, and I heard Tony groan from the living room. I chuckled to myself as I heard him mutter something to himself, but the comedy ended when I heard his footsteps nearing the hallway.
Please just be going to the bathroom, I thought to myself as I listened. He walked right past the bathroom though, and instead he was standing right in between mine and Ashlynn’s doors. I listened as he turned the handle to her room and whispered her name. The door shut behind him before I could hear anything else, though.
I leaned over the side of my bed and grabbed my purse from off the floor and pulled my phone out. I needed to preoccupy myself from whatever was going to happen between Tony and Ashlynn. I needed to stop being so obsessed. But I just couldn’t help it, nothing made sense to me and I hated not knowing what was going on in my own house.
I clicked the home button, and before I could even unlock my phone I was met with my text message from earlier. Nathan. He had texted me when we were at dinner and I hadn’t even bothered to read the preview of the message that was displayed on the screen. I unlocked my phone, opened up my messages, swiped his name and clicked delete before I could even think twice about the act. Why did I need Nathan when I had Jaime here? How could Nathan just leave me behind?
Nathan was my world for so long, and now what was he? He was just a deleted text message now. A faded tan line of where an engagement ring used to be. He was nothing.
I knew better than to allow myself to think about him too much, though. I knew better than to dwell over my shitty relationship. I couldn’t stop that rage that was coursing through my veins, though. I couldn’t help the anger that Nathan made me feel. I wanted to erase him from my mind, and I felt like the only way to do that was to erase him from my life. I couldn’t do that, not entirely, but I knew I wanted to give it a shot. Anything to put me at peace for the night.
I opened up my camera roll on my phone with intentions of deleting any picture of Nathan that I could find, but as soon as the app opened, I was met with a picture of my hair from when Ashlynn had braided it for me. I cracked a small smile at the memory of us sitting on the bed and actually talking.
My hair looked so great in the picture. I suddenly remembered how I wanted to upload it onto instagram and decided to do it then, that way I wouldn’t delete any pictures of Nathan that I might want later on. My mind worked is ridiculous ways, but in the end I managed to find a distraction. I logged into the app and looked at my profile before doing anything else. I only had four pictures uploaded: the first one was of my old beta fish, the second one was of Vic holding up a plate of tacos while we were out at a lunch date, the third was a group photo of me with the boys, all of them pointing at the Pierce the Veil shirt I had worn to one of their local shows, and the fourth was of Jaime holding a bottle of tequila up in the air, a stream of liquor missing his mouth and soaking his shirt instead. I chuckled at the pictures and the memories that came along with them. Each photo has a ridiculous amount of likes and comments since Jaime and the boys used to tag me in all kinds of stuff, and especially since the fans knew that I used to date Jaime.
I was only following twenty-two people, though; four of them being the boys. I went to my news feed and was immediately met with a picture that Mike and Alysha had taken of themselves while we were out to dinner. I liked the photo and continued to scroll down my feed. The only pictures I really saw were the ones that Vic and Mike had posted, though. There was occasionally one from Jaime, but I hadn’t seen one from Tony, yet. I scrolled down until I finally saw Tony’s name on the screen. But the picture was not what I was expecting.
It was a picture of Ashlynn taking a picture of a plate of food that was in front of her. The caption read: “Always got to get that instagram photo before I take a bite” - @AshAdela #quoteoftheday. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. There was no way. I clicked on Tony’s name and browsed over a few of his most recent photos. Ashlynn was tagged in almost every other photo. They had started their own little tradition. He would post a picture of her doing something and then the caption would be of a quote by her, followed by the hastag “quote of the day”.
It all made sense. All of those times that she had left, she was with Tony. Everything matched up. On the day that she said she was going to the grocery store, there was a picture of her posted on Tony’s instagram. On the day that she had went to fill out paperwork her job, there was a picture of her on his instagram. Did she even really go to her work? Or did she go straight to seeing Tony? How did she even know Tony well enough to go hang out with him? They had only been introduced once. It was only her second or third day of being back in San Diego and she was already out with Tony.
That day where we had done each other’s hair, Ashlynn got a text message from Nighthawk. Nighthawk. Tony was Nighthawk.
I heard Ashlynn’s bedroom door open and someone walked out and into the bathroom. The footsteps were light, so I knew that it couldn’t be Tony. It had to be Ashlynn exiting the room. I got out of bed as carefully as I could so I didn’t wake Jaime, and silently ran to my own door, pulling it open and then quickly pulling it shut behind me, but slowing down just enough to make sure it didn’t make a loud noise when it shut again. Ashlynn was making her way into the bathroom and I followed after her, stopping the door just before she could shut it all the way.
“Delly?” she asked through a yawn. “Did you need to use the bathroom?” she asked as she rubbed her left eye with the side of her hand.
“I know Tony is in your room,” I blurted out, not really know where I was going with this.
Ashlynn immediately woke up a bit more, her eyes focussing in on my face so she could pay more attention. She furrowed her eyebrows and let out a breath - getting ready to feed me some bullshit excuse as to why he was in there. “Oh, he just-”
“Stop,” I said, cutting her off. My breath was barely even a whisper. I was so fed up with the lies and excuses.
“What is up with you?” she asked, taking a slight step back and giving me a confused look. Her expression was soft, but unreadable.
I looked down at my phone. Tony’s instagram was pulled up and you could clearly see her face in several of the preview tiles on the screen. I held the phone up and pushed it toward her face. “Confess.”
Notes
Delly's OutfitAsh's Outfit
Hello everybody! Elise here. I hope you enjoyed this update. Shit is starting to get real in the world of Delaney and Ashlynn.How do you think Ashlynn is going to react to Delaney's confrontation? When are the two finally going to open up to one another?
I can't wait for you guys to see what we have in store for you all. Thank you for reading! Make sure to check out or other stories, too!
muah!!
-Elise
I know this has been a while, but please update!
11/19/15