Today was my last day in the hospital. I’d be back to school the day after tomorrow and face the consequences of beating the hell out of Tinley. I wasn’t exactly terrified of the detention aspect of my return; I was far more concerned with what people would say and do to me now that word of my suicide attempt had surely got around. Whether it’s a gossip-obsessed nurse or a student with a parent in the hospital- in some way, shape or form, the entire school would know that I wanted to be dead. There are a number of ways my first day back can go but the one thing that’s inevitable is that people will judge me- no matter how limited their knowledge of the situation.

‘Don’t stress it. What happens-happens.’

If only I could be as casual as you are about this whole thing. Worst case scenario? I could be ostracized to a much more extreme degree for the rest of my high school career.

‘You’re almost out of that hell hole anyway,’ Phe cheered.

She was right. School started in August and I graduate at the end of May! I’ll be free to go to whatever college I want and start the life I want to lead. The holidays were coming up in less than a month and it’s a straight shot from there.

All I needed to do was get better. I want nothing more than to be able to genuinely smile and laugh. I can’t learn to do that when I’m stuck in the same off-white walls.

“Vic!” I called, dragging out his name.

I was lying lazily in my bed and Vic had gone to go ask the nurse something. He was keeping me company while Jaime and Mike were at school. No matter how much I protested, Vic had the boys get his (and mine) homework and notes so he could stay with me. I hated that he was sacrificing the little time he had left in high school but once his mind was set on something there was nothing or no one that could change it.

“Yes?” he asked, stepping through the heavy, wooden door and closing it behind him.


“…Do you think they could release me early?” I asked with a pout.

He chuckled, “Not a shot in hell, love.”

I can’t say I’m shocked with his response. I looked out the window to my right and stared at the orange-ish sky.

The sun will be setting soon.

I sighed and picked at the white strings coming from the seams of the itchy blanket.

“Just be patient for a little longer, you’ve got less than twenty-four hours till you’re out of here,” Vic smiled, holding the hand that was pulling at the loose strings.

I nodded and gripped his hand a little tighter.

The minute I leave this hospital…I’ll be working towards a new me.

---

---

“Did you grab my slippers?” I asked Jaime. I was situating my things in the backseat of Vic’s car so my legs were standing on the curb and my torso was inside the car. I turned towards a
grumpy Mike.

“I bet you didn’t use half the shit Vic picked up for you,” Mike huffed.

I’ll be the first to admit that Vic went a little overboard with making my comfortable; From slippers to pillows to extravagant teddy bears and chocolates- I can’t even think about all the money he spent on me without feeling the slightest bit of guilt.

“Yes, I grabbed your damn slippers,” Jaime shouted back.

“Thanks Himes,” I smiled. “Where’s Vic?”

“Present,” he sang while speed walking out the main entrance of the hospital with all my oversized teddy bears. I laughed at the site of his small stature almost completely hidden behind the big bears- everything from the top of his head to his waist was covered. I heard him grumble a bit but otherwise he simply put the huge things in the back of the car.

“How’s it feel to be free my little birdie?” Vic asked with a grin.

“Feels amazing,” I sighed with my eyes closed and my head lifted towards the sky.The gentle but chilling morning breeze, the blue, cloudless sky and the possibility of what’s to come was an amazing feeling- but also terrifying.

What if it all becomes too much again and I can’t handle it? What if I…What if I try again?

The clear blue sky surrounded the sun, ineffectively shinning through the cool breeze and giving my body little warmth. Morning birds were singing their songs; family and friends of the patients housed in the hospital behind me were making their way in for morning visits and ambulances were being prepped.

Everything seemed so normal and I longed to feel like I belonged in such a beautiful atmosphere. I turned to my friends. Vic had closed up the car and appeared to be chasing something with fumbling hands. Amused and slightly curious, I focused in what could he possibly be chasing. I immediately identified the small creature and smiled. Vic was chasing a green butterfly that looked to be the size of a quarter. The butterfly was cutting through the air with expertise and easily dodged Vic’s cupped hands. Mike and Jaime continued to laugh and taunt Vic but he maintained a content smile. I smiled softly at the gorgeous gleam of the sun on their happy, tanned faces. I slowly walked over to Mike and Jaime, giggling.

“Vic is trying to catch that butterfly,” Jaime chuckled.

I smiled, “Why?”

Mike turned to look at me, a gentle smile replaced his broad grin from just a second ago, “He
wants you to see it.”

My breath caught in my throat; the sheer thought of the gesture prickled the corners of my eyes.

I bit my lip and looked down.

Don’t cry.

Don't you dare cry.

I heard Vic’s footfalls come closer and heard a small flutter near my ear.

“Don’t move!” Vic panted. I looked up with stinging eyes.

“I guess the little booger likes you more than me.”

I went to ask what he was talking about when I remembered the small flutter I heard.

“The butterfly is in my hair, isn’t it?” I smiled.

Mike smiled and nodded.

“I wanted to catch it for you but…” Vic mumbled, seeming disappointed.

“Vic,” I called, not wanting to move too much as not to stir the small bug, “You did catch it, don’t you know?”

They looked at me confused so I continued, smirking.

“It caught on to your good intentions- to make me smile- and decided to make your life a bit easier by coming to me instead.”

Vic smiled, “And how would you know that?”

“Because,” I started, slowly getting the butterfly to stay on my finger. I brought the bug a bit closer to my face to inspect it more thoroughly. It fluttered its tiny but beautifully colored wings a few times but didn’t make any move to fly away. Its black body sat motionless on my finger and its wings lay horizontal. “Butterflies and I have a bit in common… We understand each other.”

“And how might that be?” Jaime asked curious. Mike, too, looked with slight anticipation for my answer while Vic’s eyes stared at me with palpable intensity.

Not the slightest bit bothered by having their heavy gaze on me, I thought for a few seconds on how I wanted to word what I’d say next. Slowly, I looked up from admiring the green insect to meet Vic’s infinitely brown orbs and addressed Jaime’s question.








“We start one way and eventually end another.”

Notes

I know I've MIA but I'm gonna try updating sooner! ^_^ Hope you guys like and remember this chapter because it will be important in the distant future! Comment, Rate, Subscribe, Vote and all that jazz~~

---

Topic of the Day:Thoughts on the chapter? Whether its the way I wrote it, the length or the actual contents of it- anything! Comment~