Tony was right; my sleep was not terrifyingly full of nightmares, my medication appearing to kick in. My eyes groggily opened, and my mind felt hazy. I frowned when I realized that my arms were empty, that I wasn’t holding Bree. I sighed, burying my face in my pillow.

Maybe this was all a dream.

Maybe Logan wasn’t really dead. Maybe all of this was one huge episode, where I imagined Logan committing suicide and me having to go to Los Angeles in the middle of the night. Maybe I was just waking up from a very long, painful nightmare. Maybe that was why my head was so foggy.

I slightly smiled at the thought. If Logan wasn’t actually dead, then things could be happy again. The life in Bree’s eyes would remain, our friendship as a group of three would stay intact, and life would be good.

I swung my legs over the side of my bed and yawned, stretching my arms a little. When I stood up, my body swayed a little. I had to stand still for a few moments before I could start moving again, my head dizzy.

“Jesus,” I hissed, shaking my head. I walked across the room and grabbed the doorknob, opening the door. I swung it open and swiftly walked down the stairs, my face falling when I heard a voice that I didn’t expect to hear.

“Bree’s here?” I tilted my head to the side in confusion when I heard her talking. It sounded too perfect for it to be in my head.

“Vic? Oh, you’re awake,” she said, coming into view. She stood up from her spot from the kitchen table of Tony’s house and wrapped me into a hug. “Are you okay?” she asked quietly.

I stiffened. It was all real. All of the images from the prior hours suddenly slammed into my brain, almost knocking me off of my feet. “You okay?” she repeated. I nodded, not looking her straight in the eyes. I peeled myself away from her and grabbed my assortment of pills, popping the correct dose in my mouth.

I turned back to Bree and smiled weakly. “Yeah, sorry,” I mumbled. I pulled her into a more loving hug and sighed.

“How are you?” I asked quietly. I felt her shrug her shoulders.

“Okay,” she said softly. “I just would like to get all of this over with soon. We called a funeral home this morning, and we are scheduled for this Saturday. It’s going to be simple and easy. And I called my professors and told them my situation, and they understood. I’m not going to graduation; they are just going to send me my diploma in the mail,” she said. She sounded determined, like she was ready to get all of this done and over with. The only problem with this, though, was that she also seemed to be simply going through the motions. Her eyes were empty and tired, and she didn’t smile.

“Oh, that’s really good,” I said anyway. It was obvious that she was trying, but it saddened me to see that she was emotionless about it all, like she was a zombie. “You did a lot already,” I said, tucking some of her hair behind her ear.

“Tony did most of it,” she shrugged her shoulders.

“We didn’t want to wake you up,” Tony chimed in.

“Oh,” I said slowly. “What time is it, anyway?” I yawned a little.

“Uh, only like eleven-thirty,” Tony said.

“Oh, I slept in pretty late,” I mumbled.

“That’s okay,” Bree said. “I just couldn’t sleep, but I didn’t want to bother you. You looked really peaceful,” she said.

“Oh,” I said. “Uh, where’s everyone?” by everyone I meant Alyssa and Mrs. Perry.

“Lissy is at school, and my mom is at work,” Tony responded.

“Oh,” I said. “Shit, don’t we have work today, Tone?” I asked.

“I’m actually was going to go in a few minutes,” Tony said. “But you aren’t going. I already worked it out so you have off for the rest of the week and probably next week, too,” he said.

“Oh,” I said, relieved. “Thanks a lot,” I said.

“No problem.”

“Are you okay to go into work alone?” I asked. We always worked together.

“Sh,” Tony dismissed my question with a wave of his hand. “Don’t worry about it,” he said. “I’m going to get going, though,” he said. “I’ll see you guys later.”

“Oh, okay. Bye, Tony,” I said.

“See ya, guys,” Tony smiled and waved as he left.

“Can I talk to you for a minute?” Bree asked, tugging my arm gently when Tony left.

“What’s up?” I asked, sighing as I sunk into the couch. She sat close next to me, holding my hand.

“Tony told me what happened last night,” she said quietly. My eyes widened.

“What? He did?”

“Yeah,” she said. “Are you okay?”

“I-I’m fine,” I said, shaking my head. “I didn’t want you to know about that,” I frowned.

“No, Vic. You can’t say that. You have to tell me these things. That’s why Tony told me. He was afraid that you weren't going to tell me,” she said.

“I didn’t want to worry you, and—”

“No, Vic,” she repeated. “I don’t want you to think that you can’t tell me these things,” she said. “I can't lose you, too,” she added quietly.

“I’m not going anywhere,” I said.

“I know. But you have to promise me that you will tell me if something like that happens again?It only hurts you to hide it from me,” she said. “I sometimes forget that you’re in pain, too,” she added, placing a hand on my chest.

“I’m okay,” I said quietly.

“Tony and Alyssa told me everything. I know how strong you are, Vic. But you’re allowed to break down,” she said gently.

“I know,” my voice cracked.

“I am sad, Vic. I am so fucking sad about m-my brother. I can’t believe I lost him,” she said. “But—”

“You didn’t lose him,” I murmured. “I know exactly where he is, and you do, too. He’s not lost, he’s right here,” I said, gesturing towards her heart. She blinked, a few tears slipping out.

“This is why I love you,” she said quietly, wrapping her arms around my neck, hugging me tightly. Then, she continued her previous thought. “But even though I’m sad, and I’m a complete wreck, I’m still here for you. If there’s one thing still tying me down to reality, it’s you,” she said.

“Bree, when I had a moment last night, I knew what was happening. That’s never happened before. I could feel it starting, so I got away from you as fast as possible, just in case. And the entire time… it… was happening, I thought about you, and that’s how I got out of it,” I admitted. “So, I feel the same way,” I concluded.

She hugged me tighter. “I know I was so bad yesterday, but I will be better, for you,” she said.

“You don’t have to rush it, Bree,” I said. “Healing takes time,” I said, rubbing her back. She nodded.

“I’m so proud of you,” she whispered.

“Why?” I asked.

“Because, I can see that you are trying so hard to be better for me,” she said, and I nodded at her true statement.

“I am,” I said. “We’ll be okay, as long as we have each other,” I said.

She kissed my cheek. “Let’s be busy, today,” she said. “I don’t know with what. I guess planning, and stuff, but I just can’t lay around and sleep all day,” she said.

“Good,” I said, glad that she didn’t want to sleep away her problems. “Maybe you can meet Mike, and talk to him a little,” I suggested. “And then we can work out specfics for the funeral,” I said.

“I’d like that,” she said.

“Okay, let’s get ready, then,” I said.

“Wait, Vic,” she said, grabbing my arm.

“Yes?”

“Thank you,” she whispered.

“For?”

“You’ve been pretty stable for a while, and I’m so proud of that. And, even though you slipped a little, you didn’t let yourself fall completely. Even in the midst of your own problems you are doing so much to help me, so thank you. Just don’t forget about yourself,” she said.

“I love you,” I said, enjoying the way the words naturally fell from my tongue.

She leaned closer and placed her lips on mine. “I love you, too.”

Notes

I don't really like this chapter for some reason, so I declare it a filler. I don't like writing short, full-of-conversation chapters like this, but I also think the conversations in there were necessary.
The next chapter will be up soon, I think, because most of it is prewritten.
If you guys want something to happen, let me know please!! SERIOUSLY THOUGH

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