“Do you want to talk about this?” Vic asked, furrowing his eyebrows. He didn’t really know what to do; Vic was normally good with words and supporting people, but Tony’s situation felt different. He really did not know of the best way to help Tony get better.

“I-I think so,” Tony stammered. The men settled themselves in the living room—Tony on the couch and Vic in the loveseat. Tony bit his lip nervously, afraid that he was going to breakdown again talking about Tris. We all breakdown, Vic’s previous words rung in Tony’s ear. It’s just as long as we have someone to pick us back up. That’s what Tony was afraid of. He was afraid that Vic wouldn’t be able to pick Tony back up. Tony felt guilty telling Vic his story—Tony didn’t want to pile a heavy load of baggage on to Vic, expecting it to just go away. He didn’t want anybody else to feel the pain he felt on the inside, but that was unfortunately not how things worked. Pain was usually a shared thing. Tony knew this because he knew, deep down, that Tris shared a little bit of pain with Tony—he had seen it in her eyes before she turned away. But, Tony didn’t want to share this pain with Vic. Vic seemed like a good, whole guy—not broken, not damaged—and Tony didn’t want to ruin his apparent pureness by infecting Vic’s mind with his depressing story.

But, then again, people were not always who they seemed to be, and Tony knew that all too well.



“Are you sure you want to listen?” Tony asked—it was only fair to double check. Vic nodded encouragingly. He wanted to know everything. He wanted to understand completely so he could effectively help Tony. And, Vic wanted to take some weight off of Tony’s shoulders, because it seemed like Tony was just carrying the weight of the entire world on his small back, and nobody, not even an almost perfect stranger, deserved to feel that burden. Vic was more than willing to take some of that pressure off of Tony’s soul—After all, Vic has carried a lot of weight during his life, too, only to pass the load along to another person. That was life: a cycle. Passing each other’s weight down the line of an infinite amount of people. Everyone shared a part in helping another. That was what Vic believed, anyway.

Tony furrowed his eyebrows, unsure as to where to begin.

“How about the beginning?” Vic suggested, and once again Tony was astonished at Vic’s ability to basically read his mind.

“Yeah…” Tony mumbled. “The beginning…”

‘Tony, c’mon man, we are going to miss the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus set!’ Tony’s friend, Josh, whined slightly. It was the summer of 2006, and, once again, Josh was dragging Tony around warped tour, mixing their twenty-year old selves with way too many fangirling youths and not enough fellow music lovers. Tony loved going to Warped Tour when he could walk around comfortably, stopping in at smaller bands’ tents, giving everyone a listen. He enjoyed music, to say the least. He had a certain passion for it—he just loved experiencing it. He loved surrounding himself with it; so, naturally Warped Tour was the place to be.

Well, it was. Today, though, Tony just wasn’t feeling it. He was tired, it was hot, and he was feeling pretty down about things. Tony didn’t just want to be in the crowd… he wanted to be the person that the crowd was there for. He always dreamed to be in a band, but his confidence was so low that he never really went for his dream, afraid that he would shoot for the sky but come crashing down with no safety net. Not to mention, Tony was twenty years old with no college degree and a shitty job at Target, and he didn’t really have the time to be trudging around a field, surrounded by sweaty bodies. Despite the music being a good escape, Tony knew he had a lot of shit to figure out in his life. He couldn't spend everyday of his life goofing off, thinking about the past, dreading the future. He needed to get up and do something.

But not today, and, despite his thoughts, he knew this was a getaway that was necessary. And who was he kidding? The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus was Tony’s guilty pleasure, anyway, and didn’t want to be late either.

Tony turned to follow Josh, who had almost disappeared into an ocean of people. Just as he did, though, a wave came crashing down, making Tony stumble, but, more to Tony’s horror, making a girl with maroon colored hair fall down to the hard pavement.

His eyes wide, Tony immediately held a hand out to the girl who had fallen. She looked rather frightened, but she accepted the offer, nonetheless, smiling appreciatively at Tony.

‘Shit, sorry,’ Tony scratched the back of his neck nervously after he helped up the girl that he had nearly taken out completely.

‘It’s all good,’ she said coolly, brushing back her windswept hair, revealing a silver lip ring that Tony just couldn’t take his eyes off of. ‘I should be more careful,’ she said, biting her lip slightly. This was her first Warped Tour experience ever, and she didn’t really know the ropes. Tony, on the other hand, was rather experienced—he’s been the past few years.

‘Nah, you’re fine. It was my fault,’ Tony said, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly. He was just glad that he didn’t hurt the girl. Realization suddenly hit Tony—did this girl come to Warped alone? ‘Are you here by yourself?’ Tony asked, worried for the girl. He felt protective over her, afraid that she would get hurt by herself.

‘Oh, shit,’ she muttered, looking around nervously. ‘I’m here with my friend, but it appears that I have lost her,’ she said, her bottom lip trembling slightly.

‘Hey, no, it’s okay,’ Tony said gently. ‘Don’t cry; we’ll find her, alright?’ Tony said encouragingly, suddenly forgetting about his buddy Josh and the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus.

The girl nodded slightly, fear still etched in her features.

‘What’s your name?’ Tony asked lightly as they moved out of the middle of the pathway and off to the less crowded side.

‘Tris,’ she said, smiling softly at Tony.

‘I’m Tony,’ he introduced himself. ‘And I promise I don’t knock down every girl I meet,’ Tony joked, sending her a toothy grin. Tris, despite her panicky insides, couldn’t help but laugh at Tony, enjoying the way his mouth stretched into an enormous grin, exposing almost all of his teeth, especially the two on either side of his mouth she internally described as ‘vampire teeth.’

‘I’m sure you don’t,’ Tris replied with mock sarcasm in her voice.

‘It’s true,’ Tony defended himself. ‘I only make the pretty ones fall,’ Tony said, sending her a wink. Tris blushed at his compliment and avoided his eye contact, afraid of the way this rather cute boy made her feel. Tris slightly furrowed her eyebrows, ashamed for feeling scared over feeling happy, but then she pushed her thoughts away, focusing on not feeling anything at all.

‘Come on,’ Tony said. ‘Let’s go find your friend, shall we?’ Tony suggested, swinging an arm around her shoulder and guiding her to the Medic tent—the first place you should go if you are missing someone. If you lost someone, the chances that you lost them because they got hurt were pretty high.

Sure enough, Tris’ eyes lit up when she saw her best-friend—the only human being alive that could possibly make Tris happy—sitting on a table, getting her knees bandaged up. Apparently she had taken a nasty fall, skinning her knees pretty badly.

‘Anna!’ Tris called excitedly, no longer worried or fearful for her friend.

‘Trisy!’ Anna smiled at her friend, but then she immediately winced in pain as her knees began to sting really badly.

‘Thanks a lot, Tony,’ Tris said genuinely, thankful that she had ran into a nice and knowledgeable person.

‘Anytime, Tris,’ he said. ‘Where were you going before you guys got separated?’

‘The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus,’ Tris said, frowning slightly when she realized that she was probably missing their set.

‘No way!’ Tony exclaimed happily. ‘So was I!’

‘You guys can go ahead, if you want!’ Tris’ friend, Anna, chimed in, smiling encouragingly at Tris specifically.

‘Are you sure, Anna Banana?’ Tris pouted, feeling sorry for her friend.

‘Totally,’ Anna nodded, eying the rather attractive Medic to her left. ‘I’m just going to take it easy for a little bit,’ she said with a wink. Tris rolled her eyes and chuckled, and then she all of a sudden tensed up in nervousness. She was scared to leave her friend, scared to go off with a stranger. She was twenty-years old, but her social anxiety did not appear to be dissolving as she grew up. ‘It’s okay, really,’ Anna said, sending Tris a knowing and understanding look. Tris nodded, taking a deep breath and turning back to Tony.

‘Sweet,’ Tony grinned, happy to see that this beautiful girl would accompany him to the set.

‘Might as well live a little before you die, right?’ Tris muttered under her breath.

‘What did you say?’ Tony asked, not catching what Tris had said.

‘Oh, nothing,’ she said, flashing him a promising smile. Tony smiled back, his heart flipping as her green eyes pierced his mind, leaving an imprint in his brain. Tony was suddenly very glad that he ran into Tris—Never in his life has he been so thankful to be clumsy.

“So you met her at Warped Tour?” Vic asked, trying very hard to contain his excitement. The manager he and his brother were working with was trying to get them to play a single show at Warped Tour this year, but they would need to find at least one more band member in order for that to actually happen. Vic’s mind drifted off momentarily, dreaming about the potential he and his brother’s band had if they got this single shot. Just the week before, Mike had discovered someone who might just be their new bassist—he wasn’t a definite though, and, in Vic’s humble opinion, he seemed a little to hyper and bouncy for his preference. But Vic wasn’t one to judge—he was a good bass player, and Vic was sure that he was a nice dude; he just had a lot of extra energy. Vic furrowed his eyebrows, thinking about his music. Things would be a lot less stressful if his old band mates—Joe and Mitch—hadn’t of quit. But, then again, Vic liked what he was doing with Mike; he liked the new band name, the new sound, and he was sure he’d like the new band mates too—if he ever found some.

“Yeah,” Tony replied, and Vic stopped thinking about his personal life and turned his attention back to Tony. Vic, despite knowing how painful recollecting the beginning was for Tony, enjoyed his story very much. He couldn’t help but marvel on how cute their meeting was, but then he remembered that they had an ending, and that was not cute, at all.

Tony nodded, his breath shaky. Thinking about Tris back when he barely knew her made his heart ache even more than he thought possible. He wanted to get to know her all over again…

But he couldn’t.

“Shit,” Tony sighed; he wasn’t prepared for his chest to tighten up like it was now. He took a hasty breath, calming himself down slightly. “This really sucks a lot,” Tony said with a bitter, short laugh.

“I’m sorry man,” Vic said sadly, the corners of his mouth twitched downward in a regretful frown.

Tony shook his head. “It hurts to think about the beginning, especially knowing how brutal the end is,” Tony said, feeling tears burn in his eyes again.

He shook his head, trying to shake out everything—the tears, the memories, the feelings.

Tony knew it was near impossible, but all he wanted in this moment—this moment where the beginning and end meshed together in his mind in a terrible medley—was to forget everything. He wanted his mind to become a blank slate, but with the empty promise of no more drinking looming in the air, Tony knew that this was going to be an uphill battle.

And maybe he’d win the battle, but he sure as hell was not going to win the war.

Notes

Yay for a longer update! :D (Even though it's not even that long, oops)

I hope you guys like it :)

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