I was sitting in my car, waiting for Vic to come out of the airport terminal. I had my sunglasses on and kept staring at the doorway. People came out all the time but I didn't see Vic or anybody else from their band. I turned on the radio and listened to it for a moment.

And then I finally saw them, all of them, and I wanted to cry. Vic was the first one to walk out and the rest of their crew followed him. Then all of them waved at each other and went their separate ways. Vic spotted me and I got out of the car to help him put his stuff into the car. When he reached me, he put all of his bags down and pulled me into a tight hug.

I tried my best to keep myself together but it was hard because he was finally there to comfort me, even though he had no idea that my mother had passed away. I hadn't been able to break the news to him yet. I hadn't wanted to cause extra worry to him while he was on tour with the band.

”Hey, Lucy,” he murmured and pulled back to look at my face, ”I missed you so much.”

”I missed you, too,” I mumbled and a single tear started rolling down my cheek. I sniffled.

”Hey, don't cry,” he said and his face softened, ”Why are you crying, baby?”

”I just... I missed you so much, it was awful,” I mumbled. It was true, a part of it, at least. I had missed him, of course, but maybe it wasn't the reason for my tears.

”Well I'm here now and I won't be leaving for a while. So are you hungry? I know I am,” he said and started putting his bags and suitcases into my car. We both got in and I started the car and started driving away from the airport.

”So... How was the UK?” I asked quietly after turning the radio off.

”Amazing,” he said, sounding really excited as he spoke, ”Unbelievable, really. It was like a whole different world out there. I really have to take you there some day, you have to see it with your own eyes.”

”That's sounds great,” I mumbled and nodded. Suddenly I felt his hand on my thigh. I quickly looked at him, only to notice that he was looking at me.

”Is everything okay, Lucy? You seem a little... Off,” he said and furrowed his eyebrows.

”I, uh... Yeah, everything is okay.” Another lie.

”Really? How's Finn? How's your mom doing?”

”She, uh... She's... She's not doing good at all,” I finally mumbled. I had to pull over. I didn't think I was able to drive a car in a situation like that. I stopped the car on the side of the road and looked down at my hands.

”What's wrong?” Vic asked quietly. I was afraid to look at him. I was afraid to open my mouth. I was afraid that I would burst in to tears after being so strong for such a long time.

”Do you have anything on Saturday?” I whispered.

”On Saturday? I, uh... No, I don't think I have,” he said, sounding confused, ”Lucy, tell me what's wrong.”

”Do you think you could come to... To a funeral with me and Finn?”

”What, Lucy?”

”Mom passed away five days ago,” I mumbled.

I finally lifted my head up, feeling the tears burning my eyes, and looked at Vic. His eyes were wide and his mouth was hanging slightly open. He looked shocked, worried, nervous – he looked like he had no idea what to say or do. He looked completely lost.

”I... I... Lucy, I... I'm so sorry,” he whispered.

His eyes were full of pain and I started to cry harder. Suddenly he got out of the car and before I knew it, he had opened my door and was pulling me out. And once I was out, he wrapped his arms tightly around me and allowed me to bury my face into his chest and cry. And I did, god how I did, and after crying for a while, I didn't think I could stop any time soon.

Vic decided it was the best if he drove, and I went to ride shotgun. I kept sobbing quietly all the way to our house. Vic helped me out of the car and grabbed my hand before he started pulling me inside.

”Where's your brother?” he asked quietly. He walked in to the livingroom and sat down before pulling me down on to his lap. He held his arms tightly around me and kissed my hair and cheek every once in a while as I cried.

”Finn is in his room,” I whispered and sniffled, ”He hasn't really come out. He won't talk to me.”

”Do you think he will talk to me? Do you want me to try?” he whispered and brushed my hair away from my face. I looked at his face and took a deep breath in.

”Yeah. But don't go yet. Hold me for a moment, please,” I mumbled and wrapped my arms around him more tightly. And he did.

Half an hour or so, later he finally let go of me. We got up from the couch, I had to get something to drink and he wanted to have a chat with Finn, so we went our separate ways. I was tired from all the crying and went to change into my pajamas. I climbed into my bed and got comfortable but I couldn't fall asleep so I just laid there and watched TV because at least that way I didn't have to be alone with my thoughts.

Vic came in to my room some time later. He took off his jeans and got under the blanket with me. I snuggled closer to him and took a deep breath in. I finally felt like I could relax.

”Finn didn't really want to talk,” he said quietly, ”He's upset which I completely understand but it could help to talk with somebody.”

”He's going to see his therapist tomorrow,” I whispered.

”Good. Lucy?”

”Yeah?”

”Why didn't you tell me earlier?”

”Because... I didn't want to make you worry. And I didn't want to say it out loud,” I admitted,
”Because saying things out loud makes them seem real and I don't want it to be real.”

”But it is, as much as it sucks, it still is real,” he said with a sigh, ”But... I'm not going to leave you now. I'll move in here if it helps. I'll do whatever you want me to do.”

”Vic... It's not your problem,” I said quietly, ”This isn't your life.”

”But it is my problem, don't you see it, Lucy? I'm in love with you and this hurts me, too.”

”I... Thank you, for being here.” Was all I could say.

”Don't thank me. I once promised your mom that I would look after you and that's exactly what I'm going to do.”

With Vic, I slept better than I had slept in days, but I still woke up too early. It was six in the morning when my eyes fluttered open. I sat up and looked down to see Vic laying by my side. He looked calm as he slept and I could almost smile as I looked at him. I got out of bed carefully, trying not to wake him up, and made my way out of the room.

I found my way into the kitchen and made myself a cup of tea before sitting down to enjoy it. I stared out of the window and drank the tea very slowly while trying to kill some time.

Much to my surprise, not long after, somebody walked in to the kitchen. I turned my head to see my brother. He looked tired and was ruffling his hair as he walked to the fridge and took out a bottle of orange juice. He grabbed a glass and sat down in front of me.

”Morning,” he said really quietly. I tried to keep my face straight but inside I was glad that he had come out of his room and was talking and drinking and hopefully soon eating something, too.

”Morning, Finn,” I said, ”How are you?”

”Don't even ask,” he muttered and shook his head, ”Please.”

”Okay. Did you have a chat with Vic last night?”

”I did, yes,” he nodded.

”Was it good?”

”It's good to have him back. I'm sure you needed him, too,” he said, ignoring my question.

”You're right,” I admitted, ”I did need him and I'm glad he's here now. We both need him. We both need someone to be here for us.”

”I think what we need is to have mom back,” Finn said quietly and let out a deep sigh.

”Finn...”

”No, it's okay, drop it,” he said and stood up, ”It doesn't matter.”

”Of course it does, Finn – ”

”You know what, Lucy, why don't you shut up for a second? I'm sick and tired of you always bothering me with your stupid questions! I wish you would just shut the fuck up already and let me be. I don't understand why you try and act like nothing ever happened and you pretend that you're not hurt because I sure as hell know that you're hurt too!” Finn shouted. My eyes flew wide open and I looked at him in shock. Finn had never, ever shouted at me before.

”Finn, I – ” I didn't get a say, he didn't let me.

”No, I don't even want to hear what you have to say. Please, just, leave me alone, okay?” he muttered and looked straight into my eyes. I didn't know what to do or how to even react to any of that.

”I'm going back to bed,” he muttered before heading out of the kitchen. I stared at his back until he was gone and then I stared at the empty doorway with my wide eyes.

My tea got cold but I didn't care. I sat in the kitchen alone for a few minutes until Vic walked in. He looked like he had just gotten out of the bed, which he probably had, but somehow he seemed quite awake.

”Who was shouting here just now? Finn?” he mumbled as he sat down where Finn had just been sitting. I shrugged and let out a deep sigh. Vic filled the empty glass on the table with orange juice and drank some of it.

”Are you okay?” he asked.

”Yeah, sure,” I nodded.

”Don't lie to me, Lucy,” he said and shook his head.

”Finn's just... He's having a hard time, I understand where he's coming from,” I explained and shrugged once again.

”Aren't you?”

”Huh?”

”Aren't you having a hard time, Lucy?” he asked me.

”I am. I just...”

”You just can't admit it. You try and stay strong for him,” he said quietly, ”And it's breaking my heart to see you hold back your feelings like that. It can't be easy.”

”I just feel like... I don't know... I have to get out of this house,” I mumbled, ”And I have to get Finn out of here. Everything around here reminds me of... Mom.”

”You know, Lucy... Have you tried to contact your father?”

”What?” I asked and furrowed my eyebrows, ”My dad?”

”Yeah. If he wants to come to the funeral...”

”That man doesn't give two shits about us,” I muttered, ”He's not welcome here.”

”But Lucy,” Vic said, ”Think about it. He's your father and once, a long time ago, he was probably in love with your mother. They must have been happy back when they were together.”

”Yeah but...”

”No buts,” he shook his head, ”You're going to call him, okay? At least he deserves to know what's happened and I'm sure he would love to hear from you.”

Despite it being only seven in the morning in San Diego, I called him because it was already a decent time in England. I had found dad's number from one of mom's old address books and with shaking hands I had dialed his number.

”Alfie Wright's office, how may I help you?” I was surprised when I heard the voice of a woman and not my dad's on the other line.

”Uh, hello, may I speak with, uh, Mr. Wright?”

”Mr. Wright isn't available right now,” the woman said, sounding somewhat bored, ”May I have your name and number and the purpose of your call so Mr. Wright can contact you later if he finds it necessary?”

”Uh... Listen, this is very important and I really need to get a hold of him...”

”Well what is the purpose of your call, then, miss?”

”Alfie is my dad,” I mumbled, ”Can you tell him to call Lucy Wright as soon as possible? Thank you.”

After ending the call, I put the phone away and looked at Vic who was looking at me.

”Well?” he asked after a moment, waiting for me to say something, anything.

”It was some woman from his office. I didn't even know he had an office and now I'm wondering what he does for a living,” I mumbled with a shrug.

”Maybe he has set up a business or something,” Vic said, ”Who knows.”

”Who knows, right,” I said.

And then my phone started buzzing. I didn't recognize the number but the call was coming from outside of the US. I swallowed hard and picked up the phone.