Everything New Distracts The Old

“Give her some space, Vic. She’s obviously freaking out over something,” Mike sighed, keeping me from leaving. I turned to him angrily.

“She was scared,” I said. “Didn’t you see how scared she looked?”

Mike nodded. “Yeah, yeah, you’re right… but that’s a good thing, Vic!” I looked at him curiously. “I mean, it’s bad that she’s scared. But maybe that means she doesn’t want to leave you. Maybe she thinks that she has no choice…” he reasoned.

“I know,” I said sharply. “Which is why I need to talk to her before anything bad happens,” I said.

Mike sighed. “Vic, this is different. This isn’t the same as last time, okay?”

“I fucking know that, Mike! But I’m still worried!” I exclaimed. “I just need to make sure she’s okay. I’m not going to force her to stay with me; that would be ridiculous. I just want to talk with her so she knows I’m here for her. If she actually wants me gone then I’ll leave her alone, okay?” Mike nodded approvingly. I sighed and turned from him again, going to the car.

“I’ll drive,” he mumbled.

“She probably went back to her place,” I considered. Mike nodded as I gave him the directions to her apartment complex. I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself down, repeating in my head over and over that this was different. We weren’t in a situation, not yet. Charlie had left on her own; she had run off on her own will.

I felt panicked on the inside, but I kept it contained. Mike looked worried—everyone saw those men talk to Charlie, it wasn’t a comfortable encounter—but he wasn’t overly rushing, either. Panic wasn’t necessary yet—I had to keep reminding myself that.

“Do you want me to go with you?” Mike asked when we arrived, cutting the engine.

I bit my lip. “I don’t want to be too overly dramatic. I’m just going to talk with her,” I said. Mike nodded and I sighed, exiting the car. I didn’t know if she would answer if I buzzed her in, so I waiting for a moment, contemplating. As luck would have it, someone was exiting the complex and held the door for me. “Thanks,” I mumbled, stepping inside. I walked up to Charlie’s place and took a few breaths to calm my nerves. What if she wouldn’t let me in or hear me out? What if she was really serious? What if she was already gone?

I bit on my lip—and then I remembered how Charlie had been gnawing on her lip the past few days. I had noticed it this morning. Did she expect this? Had she been worrying about something like this happening? Why didn’t she just tell me that she was worried about something?

I sighed and knocked on her door, pushing the thoughts away and hoping that she would let me in—in to her apartment, and also into her head.

I was pleasantly surprised when the chain on the door slid and then the door swung open. The “pleasant” of that surprise quickly vanished, though.

“It’s the boyfriend,” the tallest of the three men sighed in annoyance, like I was an inconvenience, calling back over his shoulder to whoever was inside.

Before I could say anything, Charlie came into view. She pushed the man aside, rolling her eyes. “Don’t answer my door like you live here, Dex,” she muttered. Then, shyly, she looked up at me. “I’m sorry,” she said it like she was giving up—I shuddered.

I swallowed hard. I didn’t know what to say. Was she okay? Was she hurt? Scared? I couldn’t find anything in her eyes. She extended her arm and at first I thought she was pushing me back so she could close the door in my face, but she stepped forward with me, closing the door behind her. “What the hell is going on?” I asked, my voice shaking. Charlie just shook her head and stepped forward. I wrapped my arms around her and held her gently. I didn’t want to let go.

“It’s complicated,” she mumbled.

“Maybe start with telling me who those three guys are making themselves comfortable in your apartment,” I said with a frown. Then it struck me. How the hell did she even get here? Mike drove us all to the tattoo shop. “Did they drive you here?” I asked quietly, my stomach flipping. She nodded.

“I had no choice,” she sighed.

“They didn’t say anything about—”

“I knew. Even though they didn’t tell me to go with them, I knew I had to. They would just keep coming back if I didn’t.” She sighed.

“Who are they?” I asked, feeling a little impatient knowing that three burly dudes were on the other side of a two-inch slab of wood.

Charlie ran her fingers through her hair. “Dex and Sam are buddies of Triston. Triston used to be…” her voice trailed off. “I don’t like to call him my ex-boyfriend because I never considered him my boyfriend, but…” she shook her head.

I grimaced. “What do they want with you?” I asked simply.

“Money,” she sighed and closed her eyes. “Triston was great at first, but things quickly changed. I sort of…” she bit on her lip. She looked like she didn’t want to talk about it, whatever it was. “I sort of became their rag doll,” she said. “And I was barely making it by with my job, so eventually I just let them do whatever they wanted, y’know?” her face twisted, as did mine. “And they… they…” she clenched her eyes shut tighter. “I let them… pay me. It’s disgusting, I know,” she took a step back away from me and at first I just stood there in shock. Charlie always seemed so strong, I never thought she would have done something like that. But then I stepped forward and held her gently because I knew it wasn’t her fault. “But then I wanted to stop it. And I did. But they wanted their money back, for some reason. I refused because I had already used it for rent. And I just sort of left them. And then walking home from work that night… that’s when they tried to kill me. On the boat,” she whispered. “They’re the ones that… y’know…”

“God, Charlie,” I breathed.

“And I pushed you away because I didn’t want you to know. I finally felt comfortable with someone. You made me feel so comfortable in a matter of days, it was something I wasn’t used to.”

“Charlie I’ve never loved someone more than you, I won’t let them hurt you, okay? I don’t think you’re disgusting after hearing that. I feel sad for you, Charlie… but it’s not your fault. You don’t have to push me away,” I said softly.

“Vic,” she sighed. She lifted her hand and ran her fingers down the side of my face. “What about Spencer?” she asked quietly.

“What about her?” I asked. Then I sighed, knowing what she meant. But what Charlie didn’t understand was that I felt at peace with Spencer.

“I loved her more when she was gone,” I blurted, surprising her and even myself with my words.

“Don’t say that—”

“No, no,” I shook my head. The entire time I spoke I was looking at Charlie, but I wasn’t really looking. I felt dazed and like I was staring into space, like she was a million miles away. “I adored her… we all adored her. I loved her as a friend first, I loved her because she made Jaime happy. But then I got confused, and then just like that, everything changed. Why does everything change so fast?” she shook her head with a frown. “Everything changed again and again and I… I don’t know. I think she didn’t deserve anything that she had to go through. I fucking hated that she had to die, and that hate just made me love her and miss her so much, y’know? But I think she is almost happy that she isn’t here anymore,” I said. “I think she stepped forward on purpose,” I added to myself. I shook my head and sighed. “What I’m trying to say is that I’ve never loved someone in the present day on this planet more than you. I’ve never felt truly safe with someone. I love you, Charlie, and I can’t handle things changing again…” I swallowed the lump in my throat.

“I’m so sorry, Vic,” she whispered, just loud enough to slightly muffle the sound of my heart snapping. “I do… I love—”

“Please don’t say it only because I did,” I blinked tears out of my eyes and shook my head. “Please don’t do that.”

“I’m not, Vic. Why do you think I’m out here talking to you right now? And I stayed with you here in San Diego all this time even though I knew it was only a matter of time before they found me. And when they showed up, I was so fucking terrified. I shouldn’t have run off, knowing what it could do to you,” she placed her hand on my chest, my heart racing, “but I’m here now. My brain was telling me to run but I just couldn't. I can’t stay away even if I want to because I love you, and I care so much about you,” she sighed lightly.

“I don’t want you to stay only because you’re afraid of what I would do if you left,” I said quietly. “It’s just the sudden things that hurt me the most, sudden deaths, sudden disappearances, no answers and not even any questions asked… just talk to me, and I’ll be fine,” I said calmly.

She shook her head. “I’m sorry. I should have just talked to you,” she frowned. “About who they were,” her eyes widened as she clarified her statement. “I don’t want to leave you. I thought I had to, but I guess I didn’t have to….” She sighed. “I’m here, I promise. I’m sorry for the scare. I love you.”

She took a breath as she finished and looked down. I ducked my head and brought her head back up, while kissing her gently. “Okay,” I whispered. “We’ll fix this, okay? We’ll get it sorted, I promise. I can’t lose you. I won’t lose you.” She nodded and wrapped her arms around my neck, standing on her toes to lean into me more. Her body shook and I felt her start to cry. I rubbed her back soothingly. I knew she was better than what she has done in the past, just like me. We just had to deal with the demons that were coming back for her. I almost felt relieved, though, because now I knew more about her—she was more open, like I was open to her.

And then I let out an irrational chuckle. “What’s so funny?” she asked.

“They’re still in there,” I nodded at her apartment. She stiffened up and I squeezed her. “Do you want me to just call the police?” I asked.

She shook her head. “No. Technically they didn’t break in. They haven’t done anything yet, either. And if we call for what happened on the boat and what happened before then, they’ll ask questions and we’ll all go down for prostitution,” she said, her face twisting at the word.

“But it was forced,” I reasoned.

“It’ll be hard to prove that, Vic. I let it happen,” she said weakly.

“Okay,” I said softly. My head shot up when her apartment door swung open. Charlie mumbled the name “Triston” under her breath. His eyes were a dark brown and his hair was buzzed on the sides. He had a frown sprawled across his face.

Defensively, I spun Charlie around so she was against the far wall and I stood in front of her. Triston laughed. “Guys,” he turned and called to his friends. “The little guy is trying to be protective,” he cackled. I rolled my eyes. I was short, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t strong. Although those guys all over towered me. “Relax, man. We’re just here to talk,” he said, his eyes snickering.

Now that Charlie knew that she didn’t have to go along with whatever these guys said, she seemed a lot more afraid of them. She wrapped her arms around me from behind and buried her face in between my shoulder blades.

“What do you want?” I asked.

“We’d like her back, please,” he said, his kind tone contradicting his words.

“Says the man who tried to kill her,” I snarled. “Forget it.” Charlie’s grip around me tightened.

“Obviously that worked out in her favor,” Triston rolled his eyes, nodding at us. “But we weren’t trying to kill you, sweetheart. We were only trying to scare you into coming back!”

“You threw me off the side of a damn boat! What did you think was going to happen!” she argued.

“We were close to the coast. We didn’t think you’d go that far, and once we realized what happened we figured you had drowned and we didn’t want to go through the trouble,” he shrugged his shoulders. “But, look! Fate has run its course and now here we are again. You’re meant to stay with us, baby,” he said coolly.

“Not anymore, Tris. Just leave us alone,” she sighed tiredly. She went to move around me but I curled my arm back, holding her behind me. I didn’t want to take any chances. She sighed lightly and rested her forehead on my back briefly.

“Listen. If you want money, I’ll give you money. Then get out of here or I’ll call the police,” I said. Triston seemed to consider the offer.

“I’m afraid I can’t let you do that, buddy. Charlie is in a lot of debt with us, more than any dollar amount can cover,” he said darkly.

“Fine, then I’m calling the police,” I warned.

“We both know you can’t and won’t do that,” he snickered, crossing his arms over his chest.

“If you force her to go with you, I will. That’s called kidnapping. Forget everything else and that’s its own crime,” I said matter-of-factly. I knew a lot about kidnapping.

I also knew that these guys wouldn’t do well in jail. The crimes they committed a few months ago they probably couldn’t go down for, but anything they did now could surely land their asses in prison; they had to be careful, now. They had to pick their moments. This was not one of them.

“You’re a smart guy,” he acknowledged. “But a stupid one, too. Charlie’s a ticking time bomb. I’ll have her back in my hold in no time, and you’ll be sorry. Once a girl is mine, she’s mine forever.” His eyes shifted and focused on Charlie. “You’re stuck with me, baby. I know you miss what we used to have,” he sneered. I felt physically sick, and Charlie tensed.

“You’re a sick piece of shit. She’s not a toy or object that you can claim and do whatever the fuck you please with!” I growled.

“Can we just get rid of him?” I heard the one named Dex mutter as he and the other man exited the apartment, walking to exit the hall with bored expressions on their faces. Charlie must have heard him, too, because her arms tightened even more around me.

That was when I realized—Charlie wasn’t afraid of Triston and his friends for herself. It was like she was immune to them. I placed a hand over Charlie’s as I connected the dots; she wasn’t afraid for her own life—she was afraid for mine.

Notes