Maybe I Could Love You Again

I woke up surprisingly early. 6am exactly. I hadn't had much sleep but I felt alive with energy. I threw the covers off me and sort of skipped out of my room. I felt happy. The happiness I've felt in ages. I quietly opened Mike's bedroom door, to see he wasn't there. He must already be up. I continued my happy walk downstairs and as I was right. He was up and sat outside smoking. Hang on, Mike was up early. Why? "Who are you and what have you done with my brother?"
"Your brother needs to get ouR shit moved out." he laughed a little as he caught onto my little joke.

"We can't yet. Vic will need us." I sighed, reaching over and grabbing a cigarette myself. He knew I was right, I couldn't just leave yet. I had to look after Vic once he was out. My thoughts wandered back to when Mike called Tony, Tone. I was going to ask but maybe now wasn't the best time, not to mention I couldn't find the words to even put them in a sentence that would actually make sense. Finishing up my smoke and headed inside. I got myself busy making breakfast while Mike would just sit outside. Which was nothing new, he always did it even when he got up in the middle of the afternoon.

I left the sausages to cook, while I went and joined him. "Please don't tell me you're cooking."

"Yeah, why?" Then I remembered, the last time I attempted to make any form of meal that required actual cooking I nearly burned the kitchen down. I playfully smacked him, making him laugh a little. This right now was nice, just me and Mike getting along and be our old usual selves again. I missed this. But we could have it back now, once everything had settled down properly and when we eventually move out. But what about Tony when he gets out of jail? Where would he go? I handed over my half smoke cigarette to Mike and went to check the sausages. They weren't done. How long does it take?

* * *

"Afternoon Vic..." I smiled as I walked into the hospital room. I took my previous position as the bottom of the bed,, legs crossed. He was properly sat up today which was a good thing right?

"Hey princess, where's Mike?" he put down his book and looked at me.

"Food shopping with Hime. So it's just me and you this afternoon." I grinned at him. I showed him my arms and he smiled even wider. This was going to become a daily thing, I just knew it but he was just looking out for me. "Sooo, when are you coming home?"

"With the next couple of weeks. The house better be tidy."

"Nope, it's a total mess." I smirked. He threw his pen at me, laughing a little. We just sat there and talked. It felt nice having some alone time with him. I didn't get it very often. We were soon disturbed by a nurse who told us Tony was waiting to see us with a police escort. I was shocked when Vic said to send him in. I didn't think he'd want to see him after everything he's put us through but it wasn't his fault. He never meant any of it. He stood awkwardly, looking at the floor once he came in. I was waiting for him to speak, I think guilt was taking over him. I climbed off the bed and gave him a hug, hugging him as tightly as I could. He wasn't cuffed, his arms made their way around me as he held me tight. I won't lie it felt nice to be back in his arms, I was going to take a massive risk by trusting him again so easily but I still loved the boy I had in my arms. I pulled away, making him look at me as a soft smile came upon my face.

"I'm sorry." My brothers voice spoke up, I turned to face him. A little confused as to why he was apologising. "I shouldn't of pulled the trigger."

"Vic, I don't blame you. I'd of done the same. You were protecting her." Tony's voice barely came above a whisper. He was scared, I could tell by the way he was talking. I couldn't blame him for being scared. "Claire, could I talk to him in private?" I nodded and headed out the room, closing the door behind me. I watched through the window as they talked, I couldn't tell what they were saying but it involved a lot of nodding from them both. Oh that just made me more curious to find out what they were speaking about. Before I knew it, they shook hands and did that bro hug they used to do. Okay, confused!

Tony soon came out the room, a smile on his face. That spark in his eye was back. "I love you, don't ever forget that." With that he left before I had chance to respond. I stood there in silence.
"I love you too." I whispered, before I walked back into the room. Vic smiled at me as I went back in. I gave him a questioning look, him dismissing straight away. I'd find out eventually. He patted the space beside him, I sat on the edge.

"No more worries now, he's gone." He couldn't possibly be talking about Tony could he? He was going to come back. I know he was and I'd be here waiting for him when he did. Just like I promised. "Alex didn't make it. You're safe now." Inside I was doing back flips. I could finally live my life without any troubles.

"But..." There was always a but in these sort of situations.

"If Tony's good between now and next August, we'll have out guitarist back." My mouth opened slightly. What? I was suppose to be their guitarist. "I also gave him my blessing as such...."

"Blessing for what?" I cut him off.

"For you two to start courting again when you're both ready." Who the hell says courting these days? Oh that's right my elder brother. I sat there unable to speak. Who was this guy I was talking to? It sure as hell can't of been my brother. Maybe it was the pain killers that were making him high. The butterflies hit me, I couldn't believe it.

* * *

I called through the house as I arrived back. Both Jaime and Mike came out the kitchen covered in flour. I looked at them funny as I kicked the door shut. I shook my head at them and went upstairs. I needed some time alone, I needed time to think everything was becoming overwhelming. Not the bad kind though. Oh no, it was the good type. Why was I so happy then I could finally have the old Tony back? He had hurt me but right now it didn't matter. Being in love really does screw your mind over. I plugged my iPod in and put it on shuffle. I danced around my room, happiness coursing through me.

Whoever is looking down on me in that sky, I thank you.

I suddenly stopped when my bedroom door burst open. A confused looking Mike was stood there. I smiled and turned the music down. "Why are you so happy?"

"Alex is dead. Tony's coming on tour. I can finally have my boyfriend back!" I practically screamed at him. His eyes widened before it seemed to turn to anger. He backed out my room, slamming my door. I turned my music off completely and followed him. I could hear him letting out frustrated shouts in the kitchen, which followed by a smash. "Mikey? What's wr---"

"He'll ruin you again." Okay, I was a little confused. Wasn't he kind of forgiving Tony at the hospital a few days ago? He reached up, grabbing the vodka from the cupboard. He unscrewed it, throwing the cap across the room as he sank to the floor and without hesitation he started drinking it.

"Mike stop. Please. Don't do this." I pleaded with him. "You're scared. That's all." He wasn't listening, he finished drinking some of it before wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and looking up at me. "Just, put the vodka down."

"Get out." he snapped. He began drinking it again, I walked over knocking the bottle out of his hands causing the bottle to smash on the ground. He looked up at me again, hurt smothered his facial expression. Oh god, I'm breaking him. I bent down in front of him.

"You're scared Mikey. I understand, he won't hurt you again. I promise. Please don't drink yourself to death." I whispered as I pulled him closer for a hug. Everything in his mind came to him, I felt him cry against me. My own tears threatening to spill. I hated seeing them like this. "I promise he won't hurt you again." I kept saying over and over again stroking his back and head as I tried to calm him down. It was only a matter of time before this happened, he had been keeping all his emotions inside and he just exploded.

"I'm sorry, I really am Claire." I heard him mumbled.

"I know. Come on, you'll get past this soon." I whispered, gently rocking on the spot. I glanced to my right, Jaime was stood there with a shocked look on his face. I smiled a little at him as I kept hold of my brother. I pulled away from my brother, looking at him dead in the face. "Go to bed, I'll deal with everything." I was surprised when he agreed. Once he was gone, I let out a soft sigh as I leant against the work tops in the kitchen.

"It's not your fault pumpkin." I looked up to meet his eyes.

"If I hadn't of got into the whole drug scene...." I stopped mid sentence. No. Pull yourself together Claire. This will not ruin you any more. Jaime nodded as if he got what I was saying. I began to start cleaning up the mess I had made, Jaime stopped me and told me to go be with Mike and that he'd sort it. "I don't know what I'd do with you Hime."

"You'd be a hobo." he laughed a little. I shook my head, a soft laugh escaping my lips as I went upstairs. I was dreading to think what sort of state I'd find Mike in. I knew he'd have another breakdown soon. That wasn't all his emotions out yet. I knocked on his door once and walked straight in. He was sat at the foot of his bed, head bowed down. I sat myself beside him, resting my head on his shoulder. I felt his head on top of mine.

"No more Mikey, no more worries. We're free. We can all settle down. Promise me you'll forget it all, push it out." I whispered.

"There's too much anger there." My head snapped up quickly. There was one way I knew that would definitely get rid of that. I told him to follow me and he did. All the way through the house and down into the basement. The old studio that hadn't been used in forever. He gave a small side hug, a smile visible on his face. "Take as long as you need." I watched as he sat himself at his old drum kit. I smiled proudly at myself. Music was the one thing that would help him, just like it did with me.

I headed back upstairs, Jaime was done with tidying up my mess and was now sat on the sofa. "What you do with him?"

"What's the one thing he always used to do when he was angry or upset?" He gave me a puzzled look. Gosh, was I the only one with any memory round here any more? "He'd beat the shit out of his drums. Music's his life, give him some time down there and before you know Mikey Whiskey Hands will be back."

Yeah, this is exactly what settling down felt like.

Notes

Two updates in one day, hell I'm proud of myself. Anyway, let me know what you think. It's a little drama free at the moment and I just love it. Comment/Rate/Sub :) - vickyptv