Touring is hard - it's really hard. Small hotel rooms. Heavy bags. Crowds. Stress. Since it's leaked that Vic and I are engaged I get rude looks from adoring fans. Snide comments - fuck what they think.
It hurts you doesn't it?
NO
It does, I can feel your heart breaking.
"Shut up!" I screamed.
I didn't notice I was standing behind Vic at a meet and greet. Like a loving fiancee.
The whole crowd went silent.
"Mattie babe are you okay?" Vic turned around in his seat.
"Uh-yeah. Sorry continue." I mumbled. Everyone went back to normal.
I turned around and left I needed to take a break.
"Tell Vic I'm going to get a drink." I whispered to their tour manager. He nodded as I walked off.

I didn't know where I was going but I just kept on walking straight. I passed the stages. I passed the tour busses, the screaming fans, the canteen. I just walked out into a random plot of land. I sat there. "What are you doing Mattie?" I whispered to myself.

I laid back into the field. I fell asleep. I didn't tell Vic this, or anyone this but it's been harder to sleep at home. Or anywhere. I just laid there and fell asleep.


"Hey-" I heard a familiar voice piped into my head. I opened my eyes looking upward as the sun fell onto my face. It was Vic he smiled down at me.
"Hello" I smiled.
"Where did you go?" He asked me sitting down next to me.
"Here" I said closing my eyes again.
He held my hand.
"What's up babe?"
"I'm fine." I lie.
"No Mattie- we're going to get married okay we need to tell each other things."
I sighed.
"I'm fragile- I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry, we're both fragile."
"I'm losing." I sigh lifting my hands to my head.
"Losing what?" He turned to me.
"Myself." I got up saying,
"Look Mattie- I love you very much so I'm going to say this." He took a deep breath.
"People can't always be perfect, cos that's not real is it?" He asked me, lifting my face up to see him. I shook my head.
"Yeah you're right." I mumbled.
"Now you're young we're young, might as well live a little." He winked pulling out a small bag of weed. I raised my eyebrow at him.
"Where'd you get that from?" I smiled snatching it from him.
"Mike he left it hanging around."
We smoked it together holding hands and lying down.
"Have you ever confused a dream with life?" I said raising my eyebrows at Vic.
"Yeah all the time." He laughed.
I closed my eyes again drifting off asleep in the field.

---
I woke up in a strange place. It was dark- damp. I felt something or someone behind me. Running "Hello?" I screamed. Nothing no response I quickly got scared. My heart beating faster. I began to pick up my pace- walking further into the woods. I heard animals, birds. Everywhere shouting rude things at me. I started running, whoever still chasing me. I turned around quick. No one no foot prints no nothing.

---

I woke up screaming, We were still in the field. Right now it was about mid afternoon. I woke Vic up as well. "Shit, what time is it?" He mumbled in his groggy sleepy voice. It sent shivers down my spine.
"I dunno like noon." I answered.
"FUCK- I missed all our shows." He got up quickly.
"I'm sorry." I said standing up too.
"No it's not your fault babe."
We both got up and stumbled our way back.
We ran into a fan with bright red hair.
"Hey bitch- get away from my man!" She yelled.
"Don't worry about it babe." He said gripping my hand tighter.
I shoved my hand out of Vic's and walked over to the girl.
"What the fuck?" I asked her spitting daggers at her.
"You're fucking up the band! You're the reason they got in that fucking car crash."
She answered me.
"Would you still keep that pretty face, when I push a fucking knife through your throat?"
I threatened.
"You know what? You're too pretty for your own good, thats why you destroy everything you touch." She whispered stepping closer.
She pushed me down.
"It also just makes you look like a desperate whore."
She got up and ran away. Vic rushed to me.
"Babe are you okay?"
"I'm finished, I think I've had enough." I said as he pulled me up.
"No please, just stay with me."
"Vic I love you- but I can't stay here."
"Why?"
"You're so blind did you see what just happened?"
He started to talk but my brain shut off. I was done. Completely drained. I just stared off into the distance until he noticed I wasn't paying attention. Everything was racing. "Mattie look at me." He said in a stern voice. "Mattie-look at me!" He said grabbing my face. The blood rushed to my head and I passed out.

Notes

Mattie's outfit: http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=88918626

I'm stuck so it might be a couple of days till I update if you have any ideas leave a comment below.

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