These Stars Defy Love

"Okay, but I think you're being over the top. I really appreciate the help, but I don't need this much of it..." I glanced down at my suite cases that littered the curb as the taxi driver pulled them out of the trunk. I kicked at the loose gravel in the road and twisted a piece of my hair around my finger anxiously.

"I know you don't need it, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to give it." Mike and I had become really close friends over the last semester of college, but I didn't know if this was pity, or him actually excited about the fact that I was moving in with him. He had had these plans for years with his friends, and I was all of a sudden crashing them. He kept telling me there was an extra room, and I wouldn't be in the way at all, and nobody would mind. But I couldn't help but feel like my little predicament was becoming too much of a handful for him.

I was 22. And my life was not in any way what I had planned. And I had planned it. Everything down to the months of the years. Since I was a little girl. I would go to school. I would get a degree. I would escape my psycho mother. My long-time boyfriend and I would move to Europe and I would take pictures forever. But that didn't happen. I got the degree. But my mother was inescapable and my boyfriend moved to Europe with some other girl. With blonde hair and a tight body. And absolutely no problems. No baggage. Just big tits and a degree in poli-sci. I can't say I'm too surprise. We were always uncomfortably different. But we were comfortable with each other, and when everything in my life was a mess, it was nice to have something steady. And now here I was. My plan completely in shambles. Crashing in the new house of a guy that had only been my best friend for the past 10 months, that I had only known for 3 years.

"Everly... you in there?" Mike's worried tone snapped my back into reality and I kicked at the gravel one more time before looking up at him and forcing a smile.

"Yeah. Sorry. I was just thinking."

"About?"

"Nothing." He looked at my doubtingly and grabbed the handle of two of my suit cases and tossed the strap of a duffle around his shoulder. I grabbed the rest of my stuff and followed closely behind him. Mike and I were close. But I was nervous. There were three other men in that house that I had never met and I wasn't feeling so great about myself at the moment. Meeting new people was certainly not on the top of my list after being brutally dumped from a prettier and more intelligent woman.

Mike threw open the door and led me up the stairs to the second floor. We walked past two closed doors and a bathroom before reaching what would be my room. He tossed my bags in the room and I walked past him to see that he had already unpacked most of the items I had shipped there before coming. I sat down on the bed and looked up at him sheepishly. "Have I told you recently that you are the best?" He chuckled and came and sat down next to me, putting his arm around my shoulders and pulling me into a hug.

"Recently? No. More times than I could count? Yes." I snickered and playfully punched him on the arm before falling backwards on the bed and staring up at the ceiling. I sighed loudly and shook my head. "You know I thought you were too good for him the moment I met him, right?" He said it so softly and sweetly. He was the best friend a girl could ever hope for. And that meant a lot coming from me, because I had a tendency to hole up and never make any friends.

"Thanks Mike. That means a lot."

"You're welcome... I'm gonna make you meet everyone now. Okay?" I sighed again and sat up, fixed my hair quickly, and then stood up to face him.

"Okay. I'm ready. Lead on." Mike stood up and grabbed my hand, leading me down the stairs and out onto the back porch. The calmness that I had felt moments before in my new room faded as he pulled me next to him and coughed to get the attention of the boys on the porch.

"Alright everyone. This is Everly. Please be gentle, at least for her first night. We don't need to scare her away immediately." I looked up through my bangs at the three of them, completely relaxed and calm on their patio. None of them seemed even slightly fazed by the fact that Mike had invited a total stranger to them to live with all of them in their dream home. And a female stranger at that.

"Hey. I'm Jamie." One of them jumped up and came over to shake my hand. "Can I grab you a beer?" He looked super friendly. He had kind eyes and a sweet smile. I could see why Mike always talked about how amazing he was.

"Actually, yeah. That would be amazing. Thanks." He smiled and disappeared into the house.

Another one of them looked up from his phone and half waved, half saluted me.
"Sup. I'm Tony."

"Nice to meet you Tony." I went and took a seat on one of the benches, dragging Mike with me. I was holding onto him for dear life, and I had no plans of letting go anytime soon. I had always been slightly anxious in small groups of people. Put me in a crowd and I thrived, put me in an intimate setting and I clammed up like a seashell.

"Vic. And the pleasure is all mine." I glanced over at the third guy as he spoke and my breath caught in my throat. I had seen pictures of all of them, Mike had them in his apartment back at school. And I had always thought his brother looked like an attractive guy. But no picture could have prepared me for the way this guys smile penetrated into your soul. He was beautiful, and I was at a loss for words. Luckily, Jamie came back right at the perfect moment and handed me an ice cold beer.

"Thank you sooo much." I said as I took a long swig. "The plane was hot and terrible and this tastes sooo good."

Tony looked over at me and laughed. "You just moved to San Diego. You're going to have to get used to hot." I chuckled and slowly relaxed as their jokes about the weather slowly turned into conversation and I was able to just sit back and listen. That was it. I had finished that hard part and introductions were over.

As the night grew darker I quietly excused myself and headed up the stairs to my room. I opened a suit case and pulled on the comfiest clothes I could find without going through everything. It had been a long, exhausting day and throw in all the emotions of being left and all I wanted to do was go to sleep. But as I sat in bed and pulled the covers up around me I couldn't bring myself to lay down and actually go to sleep.

James and I had been on and off since middle school and then together for the entirety of college. And being alone just felt wrong. I had made it through that past two weeks since he left because the stress of finals and graduating were enough to keep me distracted. But now, sitting here in an empty and unfamiliar room, the emotions hit me tenfold and I couldn't help but cry. I thought I had myself somewhat controlled. I thought my sobs were coming out silently. But sure enough I heard a couple creaks outside my door and then soft voices.

"Do you think she's okay?" I could recognize Jamie's voice and I muffled my sobs to hear the exchange happening in the hall.

"From what Mike has said, no. I think she's having a shit time of it." Tony responded so matter-of-factly that I stopped crying and listened a little harder.

"Well do you think we need to do something? Like comfort her?"

"Dude. That would be weird. We don't even know her. Just let her get it out. If it goes on much longer we can grab Mike and let him comfort her." Jamie agreed and I heard the two of them walk down the hall, and then both of their doors shut.

I finally laid down and pulled the covers up around my head. I just needed to keep telling myself I was fine. Tony was right, I was having a shit time of it. But Mike was right too. I did always deserve more. James had never really cared about me. And he had always treated me like some sort of inconvenience anytime anything went wrong. The next little bit of getting over him was going to be hard, but I was going to come out of it a better person.

Notes