Playlist Love
Chapter 17
Hi everyone! I hope y’all had a great holiday. Whether you celebrate Christmas, Kwanzaa, Diwali, or whatever, I hope it was filled with love and happiness. And that your New Year celebration was safe and fun. Here’s a late holiday present.
~~~~~
“Don’t you dare say I’m gonna make it.”
---
Everything felt off as I made my way into school the next day. Apart from the cuts and bruises that littered my skin, making movement extremely painful, I felt like all eyes were on me. I was limping, my face twisted with pain at each step or slight movement, my eyes burned with unshed tears. But there was no way in hell I was about to cry at school.
What was I, four?
“You don’t look too good,” was the first thing Lynn said to me when I reached my locker. I gave her a small shrug and went to get my materials for the next couple of classes.
“Don’t just shrug at me. What happened?”
“Nothing,” I mumbled.
“Bullshit. You look like you’re in pain.”
“Just drop it, Lynn, damn!” I yelled. She took a step back in shock but nodded, not saying another word when she walked away.
I sighed. I’d need to make it up to her later, preferably when I’m not feeling like I got ran over by a bus.
I gathered my books and slowly made my way to my government class. Thankfully I’d gotten to school pretty early so I could take my time going up the stairs.
I sat in my seat and put my head down on my desk. I barely slept the night before, afraid that Rick would come back and finish what he’d started. And as much as I wanted to call the cops and have Rick arrested, Mom wouldn’t let me. His threat got to her and she didn’t want to risk our safety. Hell, she didn’t want me to go to school because of all the crap my body was put through, but I convinced her that the both of us staying home wouldn’t turn out well.
“You’re in my seat.” I rolled my eyes under my eyelids and gave the voice the finger without hesitation. I already knew who it was. “Rude.”
“Leave me alone,” I said into my arm. Since my head was down it sounded muffled, but I knew he heard me. He sat in the seat next to me.
“I said leave,” I said a little louder.
“Nope.” I huffed and lifted my head. Damn Quinn, you look like shit.”
I rolled my eyes. “Thanks.”
“No offense.”
“So much taken.”
“Sorry,” he said. “But really, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing I’m gonna tell you about.”
“Aww, why not?” he asked with a pout. I had to keep myself from showing any emotion. “C’mon KQ, what’s going on?”
I scrunched my face in confusion. “KQ?”
He shrugged. “I’m trying something out. Is it working, yes or no? Please leave a comment after the attached survey.”
I snickered against my will. “Oh shit,” Vic exclaimed, “I got a smile!”
“Shut up,” I mumbled.
“Fuck no, you never smile at me.”
“Because I can’t stand you.”
“Okay, but I know that’s absolute bullshit.”
I quirked an eyebrow. “Oh yeah?” I challenged.
“Hell yeah.”
“How do you know?”
“Because,” he said smugly, “you’re still talking to me with that smile on your face.”
I blushed. I hadn’t noticed that stupid smile was still on my face. Stupid crush making me feel things for this fucker. And his stupid face. And his stupid cocky grin that was so damn attractive.
Stupid Vic fucking Fuentes.
The door to the classroom opened which caused Vic and I to look toward it. Mr. Davis walked in and stared at us in surprise.
“Oh, I’m sorry boys,” our teacher said, “I wasn’t expecting anyone to be in here. I guess I forgot I unlocked the door.”
I blushed once again, although I don’t know why. Vic didn’t seem to notice and shrugged. “We’re sorry Mr. Davis, are we not supposed to be in here?”
“No, it’s fine. Just don’t let anyone else know you’re in here. No other students are allowed in before the bell rings.” We both nodded, and Mr. Davis walked out.
“So, have you done this before?” I asked.
“Done what?”
“Been in the room before the bell? Davis seemed okay with you being in here.”
Vic shrugged. “Yeah, sometimes I come in here first thing when I need a quiet place to think. Davis is cool with it as long as I’m alone and no one sees me come in.”
I nodded. “Why’d he let me stay then?” I asked out loud.
“I guess he trusts you, being new and all. Plus you’re pretty quiet so it’s not like someone’s gonna know that you’re here.”
I hummed in understanding and put my head down again. I had maybe fifteen to twenty minutes until the bell and I intended to use all of them for a much-needed nap and an attempt to clear my head.
Unfortunately, Vic Fuentes hates me.
“Quinn?” he asked. I didn’t want to answer, but I knew he knew I hadn’t fallen asleep yet.
“What?” I mumbled.
“Can you tell me what happened to you?” he asked softly. It wasn’t like he was whispering; no, it was like he was…scared. Of what? I had no idea, but he sounded so worried about something in those few words. I peeked over my arm to look at his face.
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” I said just as softly as he did.
“You don’t have to tell me everything, I just wanna know why you look so beat up.”
I hesitated for a second before I answered. “Because I was.”
“Wha-” Vic was cut off my Mr. Davis walking back into the room. He walked to his desk and sat down, shuffling some papers around and putting them in stacks.
I looked to Vic to see if he would finish his thought. Rather, he got up without a word and walked out of the room. I watched him leave before closing my eyes.
I managed to get almost fifteen minutes of a nap in my system.
Vic didn’t come back to class.
***
Lunch was very awkward. Lynn wouldn’t look at me, let alone talk to me. That tension spread through the whole table. No one was talking, and I mean no one. I picked at my food aimlessly, waiting for the bell to dismiss us from this torture.
“Okay, this is fucking stupid,” Savannah said. “I don’t know what the hell is going on, but it needs to be fixed because you two,” she pointed at Lynn and me, “are making us all fucking uncomfortable.”
I sunk down in my seat. Savannah was right, it was stupid how Lynn and I were acting. Plus, I did tell myself I’d apologize for being such a jerk earlier.
“Lynn,” I spoke, “can you come outside with me, please?”
She didn’t say a word, but she got up and followed me out into the courtyard.
“So,” she said once we were out of earshot of the other kids outside, “talk.”
I nervously scratched the back of my neck. “I’m really sorry about earlier. I didn’t mean to snap at you like that.”
“Then why did you?”
I sighed. “I’m going through a lot, and no, I’m not gonna talk about it. There’s just…a lot for me to process lately.”
She crossed her arms across her chest and stood with an air of dominance. “Like?”
I huffed and ran my fingers through my hair. “Man, I don’t know. There’s stuff with Vic and school in general. Then there’s the stuff going on at home with Mom and Rick and all this shit I can’t help, but I just wanna help, but I can’t.”
She stared at me blankly, waiting for me to continue.
“I’ve been feeling so helpless; I just want something good to happen. I guess it’s all been building up and I broke a little. I’m really sorry, Lynn. I don’t want you to be mad at me because I can’t deal with some things. Plus, if you’re mad at me who will listen to my rants?” I added a little chuckle at the end for good measure. She didn’t laugh back.
I stood there staring at my best friend as she mulled over everything I had just said. I began chewing on my lip, a habit I had developed when I felt anxious.
“Look, I’m really sorry, okay? I don’t know what else to say. You’re looking at me like you hate me.”
“I don’t hate you,” she said softly.
I breathed out a sigh of relief. “That’s good to hear.”
“But I’m not happy with you.” I nodded. “You’re the kind of person to hold things in and be really secretive. I’m telling you right now that you don’t need to do that with me. If you wanna say we’re friends then act like it. You can tell me things rather than keeping them in that big head of yours.”
I smiled a little. “Okay, boss lady. Are we good?”
She nodded. “We’re good.” I breathed out a sigh of relief and hugged my shorter friend.
“Thanks for not being mad at me,” I said when we pulled away.
“Well I’m like, your only friend. You’d be dead without me.” I shoved Lynn playfully as we walked back into the cafeteria.
***
I walked out to the parking lot in a much better mood than I had been in all day. Lynn didn’t hate me, my classes were pretty chill, and although my wounds were still extremely fresh, I wasn’t too bothered by them.
I swung my lanyard as I approached my car. But before I could unlock my car, someone called to me. I turned to the direction of the voice and immediately rolled my eyes.
“What do you want?” I asked with sass.
“Why do you always roll your eyes when you see me, Quinn?”
“Because you annoy me, Victor.” He huffed, but he knew he couldn’t say anything back.
“I wasn’t very annoying earlier.” Maybe he could find something to say.
“Yeah but you’re annoying now.”
“Well there’s a reason for that, I guess.”
I cocked an eyebrow. “You guess?”
He nodded and kicked a loose rock on the ground. “Can I go home with you?”
I inhaled quickly and chocked on the air that got caught in my throat. “You wanna what?” I asked once I had regained composure and controlled my coughing.
“Let me rephrase that,” he chuckled. “Can I come over?”
“Why?” I asked with a hand on my hip.
“Look, if I’m being honest, I just wanna talk to you, and I know you’re gonna run or shoo me away. I need us to be in a safe environment where you won’t freak out.”
I mulled it over as I unlocked my car and walked to the driver’s side. On the one hand I knew that Vic wanted to talk, probably since this morning when we were in class. Not to mention that I was curious as to where he went when he walked out, and what he wanted to ask me. All these thoughts ran through my head as Vic stared at me expectantly. “So?” he asked.
I didn’t have an answer for him yet. The last time Vic came over we had a moment. A different, confusing, conflicting, warm moment. Although I was sure that we wouldn’t have another moment like that one, I didn’t want to have to talk to him about anything.
But then I looked at that stupid look on his face. That stupid expecting look. That stupid expecting and concerned look. Then I sighed. I sighed and looked at the worried boy in front of me.
“Get in,” I said. Vic nodded and walked to the passenger’s side.
We put our seatbelts on before I started the car and drove to my house. We didn’t say anything to each other as I drove, but there wasn’t a need to. I figured Vic was thinking over what he was going to say to me. I, on the other hand, was beginning to worry that trouble was waiting at my front door.
Dear God, please don’t let there be trouble waiting at my front door.
~~~~~
“Don’t you dare say I’m gonna make it.”
---
Everything felt off as I made my way into school the next day. Apart from the cuts and bruises that littered my skin, making movement extremely painful, I felt like all eyes were on me. I was limping, my face twisted with pain at each step or slight movement, my eyes burned with unshed tears. But there was no way in hell I was about to cry at school.
What was I, four?
“You don’t look too good,” was the first thing Lynn said to me when I reached my locker. I gave her a small shrug and went to get my materials for the next couple of classes.
“Don’t just shrug at me. What happened?”
“Nothing,” I mumbled.
“Bullshit. You look like you’re in pain.”
“Just drop it, Lynn, damn!” I yelled. She took a step back in shock but nodded, not saying another word when she walked away.
I sighed. I’d need to make it up to her later, preferably when I’m not feeling like I got ran over by a bus.
I gathered my books and slowly made my way to my government class. Thankfully I’d gotten to school pretty early so I could take my time going up the stairs.
I sat in my seat and put my head down on my desk. I barely slept the night before, afraid that Rick would come back and finish what he’d started. And as much as I wanted to call the cops and have Rick arrested, Mom wouldn’t let me. His threat got to her and she didn’t want to risk our safety. Hell, she didn’t want me to go to school because of all the crap my body was put through, but I convinced her that the both of us staying home wouldn’t turn out well.
“You’re in my seat.” I rolled my eyes under my eyelids and gave the voice the finger without hesitation. I already knew who it was. “Rude.”
“Leave me alone,” I said into my arm. Since my head was down it sounded muffled, but I knew he heard me. He sat in the seat next to me.
“I said leave,” I said a little louder.
“Nope.” I huffed and lifted my head. Damn Quinn, you look like shit.”
I rolled my eyes. “Thanks.”
“No offense.”
“So much taken.”
“Sorry,” he said. “But really, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing I’m gonna tell you about.”
“Aww, why not?” he asked with a pout. I had to keep myself from showing any emotion. “C’mon KQ, what’s going on?”
I scrunched my face in confusion. “KQ?”
He shrugged. “I’m trying something out. Is it working, yes or no? Please leave a comment after the attached survey.”
I snickered against my will. “Oh shit,” Vic exclaimed, “I got a smile!”
“Shut up,” I mumbled.
“Fuck no, you never smile at me.”
“Because I can’t stand you.”
“Okay, but I know that’s absolute bullshit.”
I quirked an eyebrow. “Oh yeah?” I challenged.
“Hell yeah.”
“How do you know?”
“Because,” he said smugly, “you’re still talking to me with that smile on your face.”
I blushed. I hadn’t noticed that stupid smile was still on my face. Stupid crush making me feel things for this fucker. And his stupid face. And his stupid cocky grin that was so damn attractive.
Stupid Vic fucking Fuentes.
The door to the classroom opened which caused Vic and I to look toward it. Mr. Davis walked in and stared at us in surprise.
“Oh, I’m sorry boys,” our teacher said, “I wasn’t expecting anyone to be in here. I guess I forgot I unlocked the door.”
I blushed once again, although I don’t know why. Vic didn’t seem to notice and shrugged. “We’re sorry Mr. Davis, are we not supposed to be in here?”
“No, it’s fine. Just don’t let anyone else know you’re in here. No other students are allowed in before the bell rings.” We both nodded, and Mr. Davis walked out.
“So, have you done this before?” I asked.
“Done what?”
“Been in the room before the bell? Davis seemed okay with you being in here.”
Vic shrugged. “Yeah, sometimes I come in here first thing when I need a quiet place to think. Davis is cool with it as long as I’m alone and no one sees me come in.”
I nodded. “Why’d he let me stay then?” I asked out loud.
“I guess he trusts you, being new and all. Plus you’re pretty quiet so it’s not like someone’s gonna know that you’re here.”
I hummed in understanding and put my head down again. I had maybe fifteen to twenty minutes until the bell and I intended to use all of them for a much-needed nap and an attempt to clear my head.
Unfortunately, Vic Fuentes hates me.
“Quinn?” he asked. I didn’t want to answer, but I knew he knew I hadn’t fallen asleep yet.
“What?” I mumbled.
“Can you tell me what happened to you?” he asked softly. It wasn’t like he was whispering; no, it was like he was…scared. Of what? I had no idea, but he sounded so worried about something in those few words. I peeked over my arm to look at his face.
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” I said just as softly as he did.
“You don’t have to tell me everything, I just wanna know why you look so beat up.”
I hesitated for a second before I answered. “Because I was.”
“Wha-” Vic was cut off my Mr. Davis walking back into the room. He walked to his desk and sat down, shuffling some papers around and putting them in stacks.
I looked to Vic to see if he would finish his thought. Rather, he got up without a word and walked out of the room. I watched him leave before closing my eyes.
I managed to get almost fifteen minutes of a nap in my system.
Vic didn’t come back to class.
***
Lunch was very awkward. Lynn wouldn’t look at me, let alone talk to me. That tension spread through the whole table. No one was talking, and I mean no one. I picked at my food aimlessly, waiting for the bell to dismiss us from this torture.
“Okay, this is fucking stupid,” Savannah said. “I don’t know what the hell is going on, but it needs to be fixed because you two,” she pointed at Lynn and me, “are making us all fucking uncomfortable.”
I sunk down in my seat. Savannah was right, it was stupid how Lynn and I were acting. Plus, I did tell myself I’d apologize for being such a jerk earlier.
“Lynn,” I spoke, “can you come outside with me, please?”
She didn’t say a word, but she got up and followed me out into the courtyard.
“So,” she said once we were out of earshot of the other kids outside, “talk.”
I nervously scratched the back of my neck. “I’m really sorry about earlier. I didn’t mean to snap at you like that.”
“Then why did you?”
I sighed. “I’m going through a lot, and no, I’m not gonna talk about it. There’s just…a lot for me to process lately.”
She crossed her arms across her chest and stood with an air of dominance. “Like?”
I huffed and ran my fingers through my hair. “Man, I don’t know. There’s stuff with Vic and school in general. Then there’s the stuff going on at home with Mom and Rick and all this shit I can’t help, but I just wanna help, but I can’t.”
She stared at me blankly, waiting for me to continue.
“I’ve been feeling so helpless; I just want something good to happen. I guess it’s all been building up and I broke a little. I’m really sorry, Lynn. I don’t want you to be mad at me because I can’t deal with some things. Plus, if you’re mad at me who will listen to my rants?” I added a little chuckle at the end for good measure. She didn’t laugh back.
I stood there staring at my best friend as she mulled over everything I had just said. I began chewing on my lip, a habit I had developed when I felt anxious.
“Look, I’m really sorry, okay? I don’t know what else to say. You’re looking at me like you hate me.”
“I don’t hate you,” she said softly.
I breathed out a sigh of relief. “That’s good to hear.”
“But I’m not happy with you.” I nodded. “You’re the kind of person to hold things in and be really secretive. I’m telling you right now that you don’t need to do that with me. If you wanna say we’re friends then act like it. You can tell me things rather than keeping them in that big head of yours.”
I smiled a little. “Okay, boss lady. Are we good?”
She nodded. “We’re good.” I breathed out a sigh of relief and hugged my shorter friend.
“Thanks for not being mad at me,” I said when we pulled away.
“Well I’m like, your only friend. You’d be dead without me.” I shoved Lynn playfully as we walked back into the cafeteria.
***
I walked out to the parking lot in a much better mood than I had been in all day. Lynn didn’t hate me, my classes were pretty chill, and although my wounds were still extremely fresh, I wasn’t too bothered by them.
I swung my lanyard as I approached my car. But before I could unlock my car, someone called to me. I turned to the direction of the voice and immediately rolled my eyes.
“What do you want?” I asked with sass.
“Why do you always roll your eyes when you see me, Quinn?”
“Because you annoy me, Victor.” He huffed, but he knew he couldn’t say anything back.
“I wasn’t very annoying earlier.” Maybe he could find something to say.
“Yeah but you’re annoying now.”
“Well there’s a reason for that, I guess.”
I cocked an eyebrow. “You guess?”
He nodded and kicked a loose rock on the ground. “Can I go home with you?”
I inhaled quickly and chocked on the air that got caught in my throat. “You wanna what?” I asked once I had regained composure and controlled my coughing.
“Let me rephrase that,” he chuckled. “Can I come over?”
“Why?” I asked with a hand on my hip.
“Look, if I’m being honest, I just wanna talk to you, and I know you’re gonna run or shoo me away. I need us to be in a safe environment where you won’t freak out.”
I mulled it over as I unlocked my car and walked to the driver’s side. On the one hand I knew that Vic wanted to talk, probably since this morning when we were in class. Not to mention that I was curious as to where he went when he walked out, and what he wanted to ask me. All these thoughts ran through my head as Vic stared at me expectantly. “So?” he asked.
I didn’t have an answer for him yet. The last time Vic came over we had a moment. A different, confusing, conflicting, warm moment. Although I was sure that we wouldn’t have another moment like that one, I didn’t want to have to talk to him about anything.
But then I looked at that stupid look on his face. That stupid expecting look. That stupid expecting and concerned look. Then I sighed. I sighed and looked at the worried boy in front of me.
“Get in,” I said. Vic nodded and walked to the passenger’s side.
We put our seatbelts on before I started the car and drove to my house. We didn’t say anything to each other as I drove, but there wasn’t a need to. I figured Vic was thinking over what he was going to say to me. I, on the other hand, was beginning to worry that trouble was waiting at my front door.
Dear God, please don’t let there be trouble waiting at my front door.
@BeautifullyAbstract
I'm working on it. Thanks for your feedback! And sorry I'm just now seeing this
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