Tony stared into my eyes for a moment as he waited for me to react. But what was there to do? I wanted him to kiss me again. I wanted to feel his plump lips around mine. I wanted his calloused hands to touch me, everywhere. I wanted to feel the heat of his body and I wanted to run my hands over the sweat of his skin.

I just stared at Tony and waited for him to kiss me again. But instead he pulled his hand away from my face and took a step back while still staring into my eyes. He wanted me to kiss him. He was testing me. He wanted to see if I could do it, because for some reason he understood exactly what I was thinking. He could read my mind, and he knew that I was thinking too much. He wanted me to just let it all happen.

So I did.

I shoved my body against his so hard – my arms immediately wrapping around his neck and my hands tangled in his hair as I pushed my lips roughly against his. The impact of my body sent us flying backwards, each stumbling until Tony eventually lost his balance. We fell against the mattress that had been stripped of its bedding. Something was different this time – I wasn’t worried about what I should do. I wasn’t over-analyzing my movements and my impulses; once again, I just…let it all happen.

I pulled my shirt over my head in a matter of seconds and as my arms were in the air, Tony reached behind me and unclasped my bra. I pulled it off and reached down for the hem of his shirt. He quickly pulled it off as I undid his belt-buckle. My hands were frantic and it took me a few minutes to get his belt buckle finally off. Our lips found their way to each other again and we continued to claw at each other’s bare torsos. He kept his right hand on my left breast while his left hand was wrapped around my back. He pushed his left hand down the back of my jeans and let it rest on my behind as we continued to kiss.

His fingers pulled at my nipple and squeezed roughly, sending pleasure throughout my entire body. I pulled back to moan just a bit, taking Tony’s lip in between my teeth as I did so. He let out his own moan as I gently bit on his bottom lip.

He pulled away from my lips so he could connect his own with my right nipple while his hand still worked my left. I let out stifled moans as my hands began to pull at his jeans.

He pulled away with a determined and sexy look on his face. He unzipped my jeans quickly and tugged them down just a bit to reveal my hip-bones. I pulled myself away from him and stood beside the bed as I pulled my jeans off quickly.

Tony smirked at me when he noticed that I had decided to skip wearing panties today. I couldn’t help but blush as Tony stood up and placed one hand onto my throat very gently. He shoved me up against the wall beside the bed while his free hand immediately found its way to my clit. He made fast circles, and I couldn’t help but pant heavily as he continued. I was still sensitive from fooling around with the red head only two hours before, but this time was so different. It was so much better already.

Tony’s hand remained around my throat as he bit his lips and stared at his hand making fast circles. “Fuck,” he groaned out as I placed my hand over the tension in his jeans.

Before I could blink, Tony was turning me around and laying me back down onto the bed while kicking his jeans and boxers off from his ankles. He gently crawled over me on the bed, and that’s when I got nervous for the first time that night. I was afraid that the same thing was going to happen as the night before. And the fact that I was still a bit sore probably wasn’t going to help. But I knew that I was going to be okay, no matter how much pain it was going to be, I wanted this. I wanted Tony Perry.

Tony hesitated as he hovered over me, holding himself in his right hand while his left hand steadied himself over me. His knees were pushed up against the mattress between my legs, forcing them to be spread open.

“Just go,” I whimpered a bit at the feeling of the air against my exposed body.

“I need to get a condom,” Tony went to get up from the bed, but I pulled him back down.

“No, you don’t.”

He gave me a skeptical look, but adjusted himself over me. “Are you sure?” he asked, still unsure.

“Birth control. I’ll explain later,” I said quickly. “Please, just…please,” I whined. I couldn’t help but whine. I needed this. I needed Tony.

“Okay…” Tony said softly. He looked down as he pushed just the tip against my entrance. It didn’t hurt too badly until he started to go further in. “Meedie…” he gave me a sad look as he noticed the sharp inhale I involuntarily took in at the pain.

“Go,” I whined a bit. “Just go slow.”

Tony nodded and pulled out very slowly. I could tell that it was hard for him to go so slow, and I knew that he was trying to hold back the pleasure because of the pain that I was in. But it wasn’t even that bad. He pulled out very slowly and he couldn’t help himself as his hips bucked forward a bit harder than he had been doing. He stifled a groan and immediately looked into my eyes to see if I was okay as he pulled out a bit faster and his hips shoved himself back in.

A feeling shot through my body and my back slightly arched. My eyes rolled back just a bit at the feeling and I couldn’t help but let out a loud moan. Tony smirked from over me, but didn’t move. “Go,” I panted. He did as he was told, and continued on with a slow, steady pace.

“Faster,” I said quietly.

Tony stopped moving completely. “Are you feeling any pain now?” he asked with his breath shaky and uneven.

“No,” I said in a slight moan.

“You sure? You’re perfectly okay?”

I groaned and hit the mattress with my hand. “Tony Perry, can you please fucking move!” I said sternly. I couldn’t handle the feeling of him just sitting inside of me, unmoving. “Please, oh my god, fuck me.”

Tony bit his lip and smirked. He stood up a bit so he was sitting on his knees and pulled my body up so my hips were off of the mattress. He let his hands roam my body just for a second before they rested on my hips. He took in a deep breath as he pulled himself out of me even slower than before. I could feel every inch – every centimeter – of him as he pulled out. He paused just for a second, keeping the tip just barely inside. I groaned as he stood there, teasing me.

“Tony!” I screamed a bit louder than I intended. Before I could even finish his name, he began to pound himself into me repeatedly. He continued his movements and I screamed out at the feeling. It was unlike anything I could have even imagined.

He reached down and grabbed onto my arms as he let himself fall backwards onto the bed, pulling me up on top of him. I placed my hands against his chest and sat there, with him inside of me, confused and panting.

“Go,” Tony said with a smirk. “Show me what you got,” he said with a cocked eyebrow.

“Are you kidding me?” I said in disbelief. “I can’t…”

“Please, oh my god, fuck me,” he mimicked my words as he adjusted his hips beneath me just a bit.

I bit my lip and shook my head as I began to lift myself off of him and then back down. I used my lower back muscles to dip my hips down while my knees pushed me up at the same time. Once I got the hang of it, I started to move faster. Tony held onto my hips as he began to meet me with each thrust.

My body began to quiver just a bit as I could feel myself getting closer and closer…

“Fuck,” Tony moaned out as he pushed his head into the mattress. “Meedie, fuck, you’re so good.”

His words sent chills over my body and I knew that I wasn’t going to be able to last much longer.

“Tony,” I called out, my voice choppy from his thrusts. “I…I…” I couldn’t say the words as the most intense orgasm I ever had ruptured throughout my body. I stopped my movements as Tony took over. He grabbed onto my hips tighter than before and dug his nails into the skin. I could feel his nails break the skin, and I moaned out at the feeling of slight pain mixed with the intense feeling of my orgasm.

My orgasm seemed to last forever as Tony held my hips in place and continued to force his hips off of the mattress to collide against my own over and over again. A few more minutes passed before Tony reached his own climax. His thrusts became sloppy and he let out a deep breath that blew his hair out of his face.

“Fuck y-yeah, Meedie,” he called out louder than I had ever heard him speak. His words echoed throughout the room as I moaned out when I could feel him finishing inside of me.

I pulled myself off of him and rolled over onto the bed beside him as I tried to catch my breath. Our heavy breathing filled the, now over-heated, room. I looked over to Tony to see him sweating more than he did onstage.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so sweaty,” I said softly.

“Fuck,” Tony said simply. “What do you expect? Jesus Christ,” he exclaimed with a smirk.

I couldn’t help but feel proud. I felt proud of myself for what I had done with Tony, and I done it well.

“So, why are you on birth control?” Tony spoke up.

I sighed. “Well, I started taking them when I was really young because my period was really irregular. They help me to get my period and keep my hormones running normally. The only downside is that if I stop taking them, my hormones won’t go back to normal and my periods will become irregular again, which means I probably won’t be able to have kids. And when I’m on birth control, well, obviously I can’t get pregnant then either.”

Tony remained silent for a moment as he took in what I said. “I’m sorry,” he finally said.

I shrugged. “It’s okay, It’s not like I ever expected to have kids or anything, since I am…was…um…I like girls?”

Tony laughed a little bit when he noticed my confusion. He shushed me and reached up to push my sweat-covered hair from my face. “I like the septum piercing,” Tony said as he bit his lip just a bit. He gently ran his finger under my nose and pushed on the piercing.

I reached out and grabbed onto his padawan brain that stuck out from behind his ear. I gently traced my fingers from the beginning of the braid down to the bottom. My eyes grew tired as the alcohol began to catch up with me. I had almost forgotten about everything that happened, and everything was still too good to be true.

“I should probably get back to my room,” I said very quietly. I went to sit up, but Tony swiped his hand under my arm as I tried to push myself up from the bed. I fell back down against the mattress with a laugh. “Tonyyyy,” I whined as I held out the ending of his name.

“Stay,” he said in a whisper. “Just stay.”

He pulled me up to his chest and kissed the top of my head. I sighed at the feeling of his naked body against my own and allowed myself to relax against him. “Okay, I’ll stay,” I exhaled softly. He reached one hand up and turned the lamp off so we could fall asleep.

-

The next morning I woke up to the sun blaring through the open window. I sat up slowly, peeling my skin from the seams of the bare mattress that I had slept on. For a moment I thought that Tony might had gotten up and gotten dressed because I didn’t feel his arms around me anymore. I wiped my eyes with a yawn before turning to my right to see Tony staring at me. He was still naked. I could see the imprints of the mattress on his skin and a slight shine to his skin from the heat of the sun coming through the window.

“Hi,” Tony said softly with a smile.

“Hi,” I responded in the same tone.

Tony leaned over to close the space between us by pressing his lips against mine. “I need to do that now because I know I’m not going to be able to do it all day.”

I couldn’t help but feel an eruption of nerves fluttering around my stomach at his words. He understood that this couldn’t be public. Whatever the fuck this even was. I tried not to think about it as he kissed me again.

“Tony? Meedie?” There was a loud knock of the door that forced us to pull away from each other abruptly. Jaime shoved his key card into the door and pushed on it, but he was soon stopped by the dead bolt that I had set the night before. “Hey, is everything okay?” he called into the room.

“Yeah,” Tony called out. I stood up quickly and gathered my clothing before locking myself into the bathroom.

I turned the shower on right away and stepped in, hoping that Jaime hadn’t heard us scrambling around. I could faintly hear talking as Tony pulled on his clothes and opened the door for Jaime.

“Holy shit,” Jaime commented loudly as he noticed the room.

“Yeah,” Tony said, and then the rest of the voices were muffled through the door.

I took a long shower as my mind continued to race once again. I had sex with a man. And not just any man. I had sex with Tony Perry. It still didn’t make sense to me. Had it really happened?

I knew that Tony would surely want to talk about it later, and I knew that I wanted to talk about it, too. What was happening? Did this mean that I wasn’t a lesbian? Did this mean that I was bi-sexual? Did it mean anything at all?

I felt like I was battling my sexuality all over again. When I first realized that I was attracted to girls, I went through the same amount of confusion and analysis after Lindsay and I had kissed for the first time. I had spent months trying to figure out what was going on with me until I finally just embraced it, and ever since then, being a lesbian was the only certain thing I had in my life. I know it has to sound crazy to be attached to your sexual preference, but I was. And the thought of changing everything I knew scared me.

A pain shot through my chest as I thought about Lindsay. I still cared for her, and I don’t think that would ever change. No man or woman could take her place in my heart. She was my first love. The first one who made me realize who I am.

But then here comes Tony Perry, challenging everything I knew. Challenging the only constant thing that I had in my life.

I came back to the question that I had been thinking about the night before. Who was I?

I heard the silent click as the door was unstuck from its shut position. Tony peeked his head into the shower while I stood still.

“Are you just standing in there?” he asked with a slight smile but confusion in his eyes.

I shrugged. “Yeah.”

“Jaime brought your suitcase over and picked up his own when I told him you were in the shower. I figured you might need your stuff,” he said as he handed me my small bag of shower essentials: body wash, razors, soaps, shampoos, the usual. I pulled the clear, plastic bag open and dumped the stuff onto the floor beneath me because it was easier than constantly picking up the bag to dig through it. I would just reach down and pick up whatever I needed, them after the shower I would put everything back into the bag. It was the fastest way I could take a shower.

“What are you doing?” Tony asked as he watched me dump the bag.

“It’s easier to dump it out instead of constantly going back into my bag,” I explained with a shrug.

Tony didn’t reply. He kept his head poked in through the shower curtain and just stared at me with a small smile.

“Are you going to just stare at me while I shower?” I asked as I bent over to pick up my soap. I didn’t care if Tony watched while I showered, it just felt kind of odd for someone to want to stare at you.

“Room for one more?” he asked with a cocked eyebrow.

I looked behind me and then back over to Tony. “Looks like there’s room to me,” I laughed as he pulled his head out of the shower and stripped down very quickly. I felt the cold air hit my back as he slipped into the shower from the other side of where he had his head.

Tony wrapped his arms around me after her got in. I could feel his hair sticking to my shoulder as the water drenched his head that rested in the crook of my neck. It was nothing sexual, it was just…nice. He gently kissed and sucked on the skin where his head was after he straightened himself out. He began to wash his body while standing behind me. Every time I would bend over to pick up one of my toiletries he would place each one of his hands directly onto my ass and squeeze it jokingly. It felt normal to be in the shower with Tony. It felt like something that should happen more often.

Tony finished before me since he only needed to wash his hair and body. Once he got out, I shaved my legs and underarms and did one last rinse before turning the water off.

“Tony!” I called from inside the shower. “Can you get me a towel?”

Tony walked into the bathroom in nothing but a pair of board shorts. “There’s only one big towel and it’s the one I used. I can call for more towels if you want a clean one…” his voice trailed off as he held out the towel. I grabbed it without any hesitation.

“Doesn’t matter,” I said as I began to dry myself off. Tony continued to stare at me from the doorway. He seemed to stare at me a lot. “What?” I asked with a laugh.

“Nothing,” Tony shrugged – his smile never leaving his face. He left the bathroom to finish getting dressed.

I flung my head forward and used the towel to wrap my hair up in it. I walked out of the bathroom and saw my duffel bag sitting on the bed that was still intact. I noticed that Tony had cleaned the room up a bit. He pushed the dresser back to its place against the wall, put the phone back on top of the desk, and moved the hangers so they weren’t scattered across the room.

I couldn’t help but giggle as I wondered if this was what the stereotypical rockstars referred to when they would talk about trashing hotels. Were we doing it right? Ton ignored my giggles as he pulled a snap-back onto his head while his hair dried naturally.

He walked over to my duffel bag while I pulled on my bikini. We were in Florida for the second day now and it was tradition for us to head down to the beach before we left. It was the closest we could get to our usual San Diego weather. Even though it was significantly hotter this time of the year.

“Wear this,” Tony said as he handed me a blob of black. I pulled it out of his hands to see what it was. I groaned when I looked in front of me. It was a black dress that hit just above my knees with elastic at the waist and two breast pockets. “You would find the only dress I own out of all the clothes in there. I can’t believe I packed this.”

“Wear it. It’s cute. Plus we’re just going to the beach. And I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in a dress.”

“Yeah, because I haven’t worn a dress since like third grade,” I laughed a bit as I adjusted my red bikini top before pulling out my make up bag and walking into the bathroom.

“You never went to Prom or anything?” Tony asked as he remained on the bed.

“Nope,” I answered from the bathroom. “I was banned from all schooling events after I went to a school football game really drunk and tried to go streaking during the half-time show.”

Tony broke out in a fit of laughter and I tried my hardest to not laugh as I did my makeup.

“God, I love hearing your guys’ old high school stories. They’re so insane,” he laughed.

Our talking soon died out when Tony got a phone call. I concentrated on my makeup, making sure it looked perfect. For some reason I wanted to be pretty. I wanted Tony to think I looked good.

I walked over to where Tony sat on the bed and picked up the dress from beside him. He gave me a large, toothy grin while listening to the person on the other line. I let out a quiet groan before heading back into the bathroom to pull the dress over my body. I let my hair out of the towel and looked at myself in the mirror. I looked like an entirely different person. I was wearing a dress.

I didn’t just look different, I felt different. I bit my lip as I got lost in my memories from the night before. Tony Perry and I had sex. That was definitely something that I never thought would cross my mind. It was definitely not something I would have ever thought could happen. But it did happen. It happened, and I wanted it to happen again.

Tony was leaning in the frame of the doorway with his arms draped across his chest. I knew he was there, but I couldn’t avert my gaze from the speck I had been staring at on the counter. My mind continued to reel.

Tony Perry. Tony fucking Perry.

“Are you okay?” he asked silently. He bowed his head just a bit. Sadness covered his face. “Listen, I know that you probably don’t want to talk about it, but I understand if you would rather forget about last night than-“

“No!” I said quickly, cutting him off. My objection caught me off guard, but I couldn’t let him finish that sentence.

“No?” he asked with a smile. He lifted his head to look me in the eyes. “Really?”

“I don’t want to forget last night, no,” I said softly. I could feel my cheeks heating up and I felt awkward. I never got like this. Not even with a girl. But here I was, wearing a dress, doing my makeup to perfection, and blushing.

Tony came up to me and wrapped his arms around my waist from behind. He rested his chin on my shoulder and stared at us in the mirror. He kissed my cheek repeatedly while trying to tell me how he thought I looked pretty in between the kisses.

“Guys?” Jaime’s voice called through the room and Tony jumped away from me like I was on fire. I quickly picked up my eyeliner that was sitting on the counter and leaned back into the mirror, pretending to finish up my makeup. Tony sat down on the edge of the shower and pulled out his phone, pretending to be engrossed in something that was on the screen.

“Oh, there you guys are…woah…Meedie…” Jaime stopped all movements when he entered the bathroom. He stared me over at least three times with his jaw hanging low. “Is that a dress?”

“Yes, very good, Jaime,” I said as if I were speaking to a pet. I put my eyeliner back into my makeup bag and walked out of the bathroom. It was hard to get past Jaime since he was still frozen in the doorway. I pushed him out of the way while he continued to stare with his mouth open. “What are you waiting for someone to stick a dick in there? Close your mouth!” I said as I shoved my things into my purse and duffel bag.

Jaime snapped his mouth shut as Tony laughed from inside the bathroom. He walked out of the room and grabbed his own belongings. Jaime held the door open for us as we exited the room. Nobody was in the hallway, though. I looked around, expecting the guys to be exiting their room any minute, but all was quiet.

“The guys are already down at the bus. We…um…went out to breakfast this morning…” Jaime started to act extremely awkward, but neither of us said anything about it.

Jaime and Tony got onto the bus and I followed after them. Everybody greeted them by saying good morning, but as soon as I set foot on the bus everybody shut up instantly. I was confused at first, but then remembered that I was wearing a dress.

“Wow, good morning to you guys, too,” I grumbled as I made my way through the bus.

“What the fuck?” Mike called out. He was the first to break the silence after a solid minute or two of them just staring. “Meedie, holy fuck. I always knew you were hot, but damn. Are you trying to ruin my life?”

“Get over yourself, Mike,” I called out as I crawled into my bunk. “Just because I’m wearing a dress doesn’t mean I’m going to fuck you.”

The rest of the guys laughed and Mike made some comment about how it’ll happen someday. I just rolled my eyes and pulled out my phone to look around on twitter. There was the usual banter about how they couldn’t believe that I was back on the face of the earth. Fans were constantly tweeting me to try and get my attention or ask me questions, but I continued to ignore more of them. I still wasn’t ready to make sense of things.

One tweet stood out to me more than the others, however. It was a picture of me and Tony, the one where I’m standing on the pegs of his bike. One the picture itself was writing.

Band confession #324:
I think that Meedie MontClair and Tony Perry would be the cutest couple.

Tony had the biggest smile on his face instead of his usual shocked expression that he would do. I was smiling widely and you could see the sun reflecting off of my sunglasses. It looked like a professional picture. I looked between the two of us. We really did look cute together. Our dark hair matched each other, our gauges the same size, and our skin tone contrasting to form a beautiful compliment between our smiles.

I retweeted the picture and added: Such an awesome picture…such an interesting caption.

A few seconds later my phone pinged as I watched a notification from twitter pop up. Tony also retweeted the picture, and added: We’re so hot.

A few seconds later my curtain was pulled open and Mike was standing there with a large frown. “Are you leaving me for Tony?” he pouted.

“She’s mine!” Tony yelled from the other side of the bus.

“I will kill you, Tony!” Mike shouted back. This was normal for Mike to be possessive over me since he thought he was such a lady-killer, but this time I couldn’t help but feel awkward. Was I really Tony’s?

-

I leaned back on the towel and soaked in the heat from the sun. I closed my eyes but could still see the brightness of the sun through both my sunglasses on my eyelids. I was slowly starting to drift off into a light sleep with the warmth of the sun and the sound of the waves calming my nerves. Just as I was about to give in to the relaxation, it suddenly grew dark. I felt water dripping down onto my sunglasses and I snapped my eyes open to see what the hell was going on.

Tony stood over me holding a large, dripping stem of seaweed over my body. Now, not many things disgust me or frighten me, but seaweed is definitely one of them. The texture of it, the smell of it, and the fact that fish have been living with it…fuck no, seaweed scared and grossed the fuck out of me.

“Tony Perry, put the seaweed down before anyone gets hurt,” I said in my calmest voice I could manage. He lowered the seaweed just enough so I was able to get a whiff of its foul, fishy smell. “Tony!” I screeched a bit as a water droplet landed on my cheek.

“What?” he asked in a childish manner. He lowered it even more and I quickly rolled off of my towel and into the sand. “What’s the matter?”

I lifted my body up very quickly and backed away from him. “Stop!” I screamed with a smile. The rest of the guys watched as they splashed around in the water. They knew how much I hated seaweed.

“Wait, Meedie, where are you going?” Tony called after me as I broke out into a full on sprint.

It was really hard to run in the sand so I made my way over to where the water met the sand so it was easier to get away from Tony. He continued to chase me all around the beach in circles until I ended up running over to Jaime to try and get him to shield me from Tony. I held onto Jaime’s shoulders and used him as a human shield. The water was up to the middle of my thighs now.

“Hey, leave me out of this!” Jaime shouted as I turned him around in circles.

Tony ducked down a bit and looked at us with determination in his eyes. He backed up a bit, and I let go of Jaime, assuming that Tony was going to back off. He held the seaweed out in front of him and broke out into a sprint, straight toward us.

“Fuck that!” Jaime shouted while quickly jumping out of the way.

Tony’s body collided into my own and he tackled me down into the water. Our bodies submerged completely. Tony’s body was on top of my own as we went under water, and I could have sworn I felt his lips hit mine, but with the waves crashing over us I couldn’t be too sure. He pulled us both up so our faces weren’t under water.

“I think this is my favorite place,” Tony said with a sly grin.

“The beach?”

“No, on top of you.” He smirked and snuck a quick kiss onto the tip of my nose as another wave pushed us around.

I pushed him off of me with a smile. “Oh, shut up,” I laughed. We stood up and I began to make my way back up to the towels we had set out. On the way up we took turns tripping each other or pushing each other into the sand just for laughs.

“Meedie,” Mike said as he pointed at me. “What the fuck is that?”

“What?” I asked, slightly panicked. The first thought was that seaweed was on me, or maybe even some sort of fish or something. I began to slide my arms over my body frantically, hoping to get whatever it was off of me.

“No,” Mike laughed. “Those cuts.” Mike came closer and pushed his finger onto my hip. I looked down to see four-crescent moon scabs on my hip-bones. “There’s some on the other side, too.”

“Those look like fingernail marks,” Vic said as he wiggled his eyebrows. “That red-head must’ve been good, huh?”

I blushed immediately as I looked at the scabs on my hips. If only they knew that they were actually Tony Perry’s marks…

Tony marched up to the towels, trying to ignore the conversation completely. He seemed somewhat frustrated as he sloppily shook out his towel and rolled it under his arm. “I’m ready to go,” he said quickly.

Everyone agreed that we had enough of the beach and we all made our way up to the towels. Tony stormed off to the bus just as I approached my towel.

“What’s up his ass?” Mike asked quietly as we watched him fling open the door to the bus and step inside without looking back. “Damn.”

“How should I know? That was kind of out of nowhere.”

“So is your guys’ friendship,” Mike said.

I rolled up my towel and bit my bottom lip. “What do you mean?” I wanted to make sure that my words were still strong and didn’t give any of my worries away. People were starting to notice that Tony and I were closer, which was fine…at first. But now that Tony and I were really close, I was afraid of people knowing. Surely it would be weird. Surely the guys wouldn’t like the idea. Surely the fans wouldn’t like it. I was supposed to be known for being the lesbian, the lesbian who wasn’t afraid to admit to her sexuality. There were only a few of us in the music scene, and people really looked up to me, to us, for it. If I lost that, I would have nothing.

“You and Tony are all buddy-buddy all of the sudden,” Mike said.

“We talked about…Marky…”

It was true. Marky was the one who brought us together. Tony and Marky were best friends, and through his death, Tony and I had found our way to each other. It took about a year for us to finally talk about it, but I felt like Tony really was my best friend.

Tony had made his way into my life, and I don’t think I could get rid of him if I tried.

Mike nodded and we made our way up to the bus. As we walked, Mike stared at my face. Observing every feature with narrowed eyes.

I gently shoved him without turning to look at him. “What are you looking at?”

“You,” he said slowly. “You look different. Something is different. You look…happy.”

I smiled at his words. I wasn’t entirely happy, but I was definitely happier than before. I felt like I didn’t need to wallow in my regrets and my thoughts now that I had admitted to them out loud. Talking about Marky’s death was still weighing my heart down, but the tension in my mind had eased and I could stand a little taller without my thoughts dragging me down. I could smile a little wider without worrying about my thoughts getting in the way of any happiness that I might feel.

You can be sad and happy at the same time, and although it sounds miserable, it was one of the greatest realizations I had come to since Marky’s death.

“I am happier. Not quite full on happy, but getting there,” I responded as Mike held the door open for me.

“Does this mean you’ll finally suck my dick?” he said as he opened his eyes a bit wider with a hopeful smirk across his lips.

“Maybe,” I laughed out, knowing that giving Mike false hope would send him into a fit of happiness.

Mike opened his mouth to say something, but a female voice filled the bus before anything could be said.

“I sure hope that’s false hope, Meedie.”

I bit down hard on my tongue, surely drawing blood. The sound of her voice paralyzed me. I closed my eyes tightly, wishing that it couldn’t be real. Wishing that I was actually still dreaming. Wishing that she wasn’t here.

I turned around with my eyes still closed, hoping that when I were to open them everything would be normal. I opened my eyes and a pained gasp escaped my lips as I met the gaze of an all too familiar blonde standing by the couches. Vic, Tony, and Jaime were standing in the bunks, staring widely at the scene in front of them.

“Hi, Meedie,” she said gently. Her green eyes swallowed me up and I could hardly even think.

I needed to say something, anything. The only thing I could manage as a greeting was her name to breathlessly escaped my lips.

“Lindsay.”

Notes

Meedie's Outfit

Sorry it took a while to get this up! And I knew the sex-scene was a bit extensive, I made it that way because it was their first time doing it together, so I figured it would be important to expand the scene. The rest of the them probably won't be as long and detailed...unless you'd like them to be? haha.

Why do you think Tony was mad?
What do you think is going to happen now that Meedie's ex is there? What do you think Lindsay wants?

Thank you so much for the feedback on this story. It's amazing.

xoxoxox

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