The Diary (Sequal To The Pact)
Going at home didn’t really feel like going home anymore for me. It didn’t matter if I went to my childhood home or the one I lived in with my girlfriend now. I had just been on the road too much to feel at place at neither of them. My ability to feel ‘at home’ had completely disappeared. When I was on the road, I longed for my house and my family. But if I was at home, I wanted to be at the road again.
But going home did give me some sort of satisfaction. I can’t explain the feeling when you see your family and girlfriend again after weeks, and sometimes months, on the road. When I got back I just wanted to stretch the time I had with them for as long as I could.
“What do you want to drink, darling?” My mother asked as she walked into the garden I used to play tag in with my little brother.
My father, Mike and me were sitting in garden chairs and were enjoying the warm evening sun. I smiled to my mother. “Coffee please.I need caffeine.” I said.
That was also a side effect of my job. I was practically always tired. Ah well, I guess every job had its downs.
My mother nodded and walked into the house again.
“So what have you guys been up to lately?” my dad asked. We had actually just come home from tour a few days ago and we hadn’t had time to catch up yet. From the moment we came home, we had been thrown into interviews and other appointments.
“Practically the same old thing.” Mike said and he shrugged. “Lots of countries, lots of performing, lots of booze.” He said and he grinned at the last part.
I rolled my eyes. Going on tour with four guys and their mostly male crew members always resulted in a lot of beer being drunk. I can’t even count the amount of times I had woken up with a hangover.
“And we started the new album. Well, we started the preparations. But still.” I said and I thought about our day at the studio yesterday. I was so excited to work on it again.
My mom put my cup of coffee on the table and sat down at the only empty chair. “Yes, how did that go? How is Luna?” she asked.
I grinned. My parents had always loved Luna from the moment she started helping me with my homework. When she left to Los Angeles, they had been heart-broken too. Maybe even as much as we were. They had resented her a little while after that, but as soon as I moved on from her, they were speaking well of her again.
“We have no idea.” I said a little bit absent. “She acted very silent and professional.”
“She does still have a crush on Vic, though.” Mike said and he wiggled his eyebrows at me. Wow, we had spent one day with her and Mike was immediately back to teasing her. Just like in the good old days.
My parents believed him though and looked at me with a shocked expression. I saw my father open his mouth and interrupted him before he could say something. “She doesn’t. Mike is fooling with you.” I said and shot an annoyed glare to Mike.
He sighed. “Yes, she does. You should’ve seen her face when she saw you again. She was as red as a tomato.” He said with the annoying grin still on his face.
My parents looked from me to Mike but said nothing. “Mike, you’re forgetting that we hadn’t had the awkward ex talk yet. It’s a little embarrassing at first.” I said, trying to convince my little brother. It was like trying to move a wall: stupid and pointless.
“Do look out a bit, will you Honey?” My mother asked and I saw that her familiar worried frown was on her face. No matter how much she liked Luna, she was terrified of me getting hurt again. Besides, she was convinced that me and Danielle were going to get married in the future. She always tried to casually bring up the conversation when she was visiting.
I sighed and closed my eyes. “Mom, it’s thirteen years ago. I don’t have feelings for her anymore and she doesn’t either. The only thing I want from her is for her to produce the album. And maybe it would be nice to see if we can be friends again.” I said and my mom nodded. She could get protective at times, but she also knew when to quit. She knew me and Mike were old enough to make our own decisions and sometimes mistakes.
“Good luck with that last part.” Mike said. “She didn’t really make an effort to start a deep conversation or something.”
It didn’t really worry me. “She just feels a little uncomfortable. And she probably wants us to make the first step. I mean she probably knows that she has been cruel to us all those years ago and she thinks we don’t want to be friends. We just need to take the first step and she will ease up to us. C’mon, aren’t you at least a little bit curious about her life now?” I asked Mike. Luna always had been kind of a mysterious girl, but it had heightened over the years I guess.
Mike thought for a while and then nodded. “Yeah, I guess so. I mean, she was hardly just a high school buddy of ours. There’s one thing I don’t want to know anything about, though. And that thing is my ex.” He said with a disgusted face.
Me and my parents laughed as it was obvious which ex he had meant. Of course there was a chance that Casey was still friends with Luna. Mike and Casey had had a break up with a lot of drama. They pretty much broke up screaming at each other and I’m pretty sure Casey punched him in the face at one point.
“Being friends with Luna doesn’t mean being friends with Casey.” My dad said to Mike.
“Besides, how big is the chance that they’re actually still friends?” I said. “Everyone grows apart sometime.”
Mike let out a deep breath and shook his head. “I still think you’re out of your mind, bro. We were kids when we were friends with her. I don’t think we can just rewind things to how they were.” He said and he was a bit more serious now.
I shrugged. “We could always try. If we don’t succeed, then it’s too bad, but we still have a killer album.”
I honestly tried to just do my job. They made it so hard on me, though.
We barely had anything to do and they kept asking me personal questions. Especially Jaime and Vic were bad. They seemed to take every chance they got to ask me about my private life. Mike and Tony just seem to back them up in everything. I never gave them any details, though. I always either answered really short or ignored their questions completely.
It got harder and harder to do that, though.
They were still pretty much the same people. Vic and Tony seemed a little more confident, Mike a bit more grown up and Jaime a bit louder, but in general they still kind of matched with my personality. I really had to try hard to not go along with their infectious humor and funny conversations. But I didn’t. I just couldn’t disappoint them again.
So instead I tried to shift the conversation towards the album the entire time. That was hard because my assistant-producer didn’t back me up. He was just pushing me to answer their questions every time. Of course he did it to tease me. Danny just was like that.
“Where do you live now?” Jaime asked as I searched through some papers on the panel.
“Los Angeles.” I said shortly as I took a piece of paper from the pile. I turned my head towards Vic and purposely didn’t look him in the eyes. “What about this one? How does it sound?” I asked and I handed him the paper.
“Yeah we know, but like where in Los Angeles? It’s pretty big.” Jaime tried again from the couch. In the corner of my eye I saw Danny grin and shake his head. He was definitely amusing himself.
“I haven’t figured it out yet. I really love the lyrics from this one, but I can’t seem to figure out the melody.” Vic said and he gave me back the paper.
“Alright. Any songs you have figured out? Or even partly? Just so we can scrap it from our to-do list.” I said and I stalled all the copies of the songs Vic had written over the panel. Ever since we first met again a week ago, I had read them all through and they were honestly amazing. From experience I knew that probably half of them wouldn’t make the album, but I was surprised at how prepared he was.
“Luna…” Tony pushed. He said in a chair in the corner of the room and he mentioned with his head towards Jaime who was still waiting for my answer.
I turned away from them and rolled my eyes. “I live in Sun Valley in an apartment.” I said and took a sip from my coffee.
“Just this one.” Vic said and he pointed at a paper I had stalled out. He walked over beside me and leaned down with his hands on the panel. “I figured out the melody for this one before I figured out the lyrics. I just kind of wrote things that fitted the emotion I felt with the melody. Do you have a nice place? I guess it’s better than an abandoned bus.” He said, changing the subject at the last sentences.
Before I knew it I had let out a short chuckle. Back when I still lived in San Diego and we were both poor college students, we had always joked about living in the abandoned bus if we would be broke in the future. We had made plans for painting the walls and building a Jacuzzi in the back. I don’t think I have ever laughed more than the day we came up with that idea.
“My place is hardly any better.” I said and I couldn’t keep myself from shooting Vic a smile. He smiled back and I felt my stomach do a flip. I immediately looked away again, acting like I was searching through the pile. In the corner of my eyes I saw that Vic took his hands of the panel.
“Maybe you should work through the melody with Luna in private sometime. Until you have something the rest of us are kind of irrelevant anyway.” Danny said and he shot me a short wink. My insides dropped. I couldn’t be alone in a room with Vic. He would look through me. He would somehow convince me to be friends with them again. He would somehow use his charm on me to open up. Whether I liked it or not, he still had some sort of power over me.
“Yeah, that would be great.” Vic said to my surprise and I stiffened from head to toe. “Your place or mine?”
I looked at him and saw that he was dead serious. Why was this so easy for him? Why was I the only one having trouble being around him?
I just stared at him for a few seconds with my mouth open. It must’ve looked incredibly stupid. My thought was confirmed by the other guys, because they all chuckled.
Luckily for me, the awkward moment was broken before it could get even more awkward by one of the people that worked at this studio. The man leaned against the opening of the door. “Luna, your little sister is here.” He said.
I saw the guys of Pierce The Veil all exchange surprised looks. They hadn’t seen her since she was only two years old.
I sighed. “Martin, she knows she can’t come here. Besides, she lives with my father on Mondays.” I said.
The guy with the short black hair shrugged. “I tried to tell her that. She told me that you have to explain her French homework to her.” He said unemotionally.
If there was one thing important to Allison, then it was school. It wasn’t like she was a nerd of anything, she just worked really hard to get good grades. She was very intelligent, but if it came to studying for exams, she seemed to shut down and stress out completely. So every time she had a test or anything, she needed me to explain things. It was like she forgot that I hadn’t gone to high school for fifteen years anymore at times like that.
“Tell her to wait in the lobby. I will be there when I’m done here.” I said. It maybe sounded a bit harsh, but I couldn’t just abandon everyone here to help my sister with her homework.
“You can go, Luna.” Danny said dryly and he spun around in his desk chair. “We’re done here anyway.”
“Are you sure?” I asked and I looked at everyone in the room. This was my first real producer job and I didn’t want to screw things up.
Everyone nodded except for Jaime. He had a wide grin on his face. “You can also invite her in. We’d like to meet her.” He said and excitement grew on everyone’s face.
I shot him a glare. He did this to interfere in my life again. I didn’t want Allison to meet them. She was part of my private life and I wanted to keep that life as far away from this studio as I could. “I don’t know, she probably just wants to make her homework right now.” I said. I knew that wasn’t true though. Allison worked hard, but it wasn’t like she enjoyed making homework. On the contrary, she came into my room all the time trying to postpone her work by annoying the crap out of me.
“She is a fourteen year old girl. Homework is probably the last thing she wants to be doing right now.” Mike said.
Before I could argue him, Martin spoke up. “I’ll go ask her.” He said in his monotone voice, leaving in the direction of the lobby. I raised my hand to stop him, but he was already gone before I could do anything, so I lowered it again.
I fell down in my desk chair and hoped this moment would go as fast as possible. The faster this was over, the faster we could go back to just being co-workers again.
Within a few seconds a blonder haired girl cautiously appeared in the door. She looked around the room and seemed a bit uncomfortable in a room full of strangers. She wasn’t really the most extroverted girl and most of the time I had to do all the talking around people we didn’t know. She awkwardly shuffled around and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear.
“Hey Allison, how are you doing?” Danny asked in his usual upbeat voice.
She looked at him and immediately started to seem a bit more in place again by seeing a familiar face. “I’m good, Danny. Have you seen the last episode of Pretty Little Liars?” she asked excited, even though her voice was a bit softer than normal.
Danny chuckled and leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. “Definitely. I hate the new season, Toby and Spencer should get back together again.” He said and he definitely seemed in his element.
Allison practically always discussed these kind of things always with Danny. Allison was really a girly girl and she mostly couldn’t stop talking about make-up and Gossip girl. I was more of a tomboy and because of that I always listened to her rants about her obsessions, but I never really understood it. Danny did love these kind of things, but at the other hand, Danny didn’t just like girly things, he just loved everything.
A smile grew on Allison’s face. “I agree. I don’t get why they broke them up in the first place. Just like Hanna and Caleb.” She said.
She looked over to the couch on which the guys of Pierce The Veil were sitting and shot them a quick but awkward smile. I saw it as my sign to introduce them. I just wanted this over with. “Allison, these are the guys of Pierce The Veil: Mike, Tony, Jaime and Vic. I’m going to help them produce their new album.” I said. “Guys, this is my little sister Allison.”
The guys were all taking her in from head to toe, which made Allison more uncomfortable of course. “Wow, you’ve grown a lot.” Jaime said and he seemed pretty excited.
Allison raised an eyebrow. “Uhm, have we met before?” she asked them confused.
“Uhm yeah. But you were too young to remember.” Tony said. “We were your sisters best friends in high school.”
Allison looked at me, back at the guys and then back at me. It was obvious that she was trying to remember something. “Oh, she never spoke of you guys.” Allison said.
A piercing silence felt the room. I saw the expression of every single one of the guys break. I knew they had some sort of weird hope that we could be friends again, but my sister had broken it with only six words. Six words that weren’t even entirely true. I had told her about them now and then, I just never used their names. I just hoped that this was enough for them to understand that they should stay away from me. I rather crush their spirits now than in a few weeks, when they hope had maybe grown even more.
“Of course she has. You might just not remember it. It has been a long while ago.” Vic said and even though there was a bit of hurt in his eyes, he tried to hide it with a friendly smile. “I was the one that bought you that pink stuffed bunny. Do you remember it?”
Allison’s eyes grew big. “Fluffy?” she asked. “That was my favorite stuffed animal growing up! I still have it!” she sounded enthusiastically. She never was like this with strangers. I remember her getting along with Vic years ago too. One day he had started make weird faces when she didn’t want to eat, so she would laugh and we could shove a spoon into her mouth. From that day on, she had asked for Vic every day at diner. Sometimes she refused to eat without him.
“Really? That’s so cool!” Vic said and the happiness had returned to his eyes again. “I remembered you always used to dress it up in princess dresses. From the looks of you, you’re still really into fashion.”
Allison blushed and pulled a bit at the end of her red skirt. “Yes, I love it.” She said. Even though I didn’t really wanted them to bond, I couldn’t help but feel a little bit happy looking at this beautiful moment.
“My girlfriend is a model. Maybe you can check out a photoshoot sometime.” Vic proposed. Oh god no.
Allison’s head shot to me, her face overly excited. “Luna, can I please go? I could take my camera and maybe the photographer could teach me some things!” she said. She had always liked to make pictures, so for her fourteenth birthday, me and my father had gotten her a professional camera. Going to that shoot could teach her so many cool things.
I chuckled at her excited face. Allison was the most down to earth person I knew, but she when she was excited about something, it was fucking adorable. “I will think about it.” I said. I didn’t wanted to say no, because then I would be the evil one, but I was sort of hoping she would forget about it in a few days.
“C’mon Luna, it’s not like he’s a stranger. He is your friend, right?” she asked and her eyes were practically begging me.
I didn’t really knew what to say to that. If I would say yes, it would give the guys hope, but if I would say no, I would have to explain to Allison why we weren’t friends anymore. I didn’t want her involved in this.
“Yes, I am.” Vic said and I shot him a glare. He just smiled at me until I was infected with his smile and the corners of my mouth started twitching.
I looked away. “Let’s go home, All. We’ll talk about it there. You’re postponing your homework again.” I said.
Allison pouted. “I don’t want to go.” She said whining.
I sighed. Vic had just made a master move. This was turning into a game and I hated that he had made Allison a pion in it.
Jesus Christ. It's almost one am here! I've stayed up writing this so you guys better be fucking grateful XD. Just kidding. I just couldn't stop writing anymore.
Oh well, what do you guys think of Allison? She is a polar opposite of Luna, huh? To be honest her character and her bond with Luna is inspired by the my real sister. Yes, my sister usually comes into my room whining about pretty little liars or gossip girl XD oh well I love the girl so it's okay <3