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Tables Turned

Tables Turned

The thing I feel most ironic about funerals is that it has fun in the title. Why? What the fuck is fun about burying someone who means a lot to you? Who named it that anyway? An insensitive idiot that's who.

I don't really like these kinda things because at the end of the day, why would I enjoy burying someone. Why would I want to say good bye? I just have so many questions to ask and I don't know who to ask. The worst part is that no one seems to know how to talk to me. Everyone just tip toes around the whole thing. I can't deal with it for much longer.

Since it happened I never left Vic's room. I went back and slept in his room for a good 4 days without leaving it. I refused to even shower, I guess that's kinda gross but whatever. I'm allowed to grieve.

No one wanted to tell me not to be so hard on myself but I couldn't help it. Turns out he was trying to come to the airport and beg me to stay, if I had of just stayed in the first place he'd still be alive. He wouldn't have been on that road and wouldn't have died.

They never found the person that killed him and honestly, I don't really care about that right now. I know most people would want justice or revenge but I just want Vic back. I just want him in my arms. I want his band to get super popular and everyone to just be happy. But he was never going to get that. Not now.

“Savannah, are you okay?” Mike asked me. I looked at him and gave him a weak smile. He didn't need to really know the truth because he felt something similar to what I did. He knew Vic as a brother and I knew him in a way that only so many lucky people got to. Nothing could compensate for that.

“I'm okay, are you?” I asked in return. He gave me the same look that I had been giving people all week.

“You know, it doesn't seem to be getting any easier.” He sighed, rubbing his red and puffy eyes.

“I'm just hoping for a day where it does. I would do anything to have that day be soon.” I told him, being brutally honest.

“Most people would give anything to get the person back.” He pointed out.

“Ah yes, that goes without saying though but it'd be impossible to get him back. He's gone and that's it. All I can do now is realistically hope that I can take a part of him and help him live on through that and be as happy as I can be. Y'know?” Mike nodded in understanding. He knew what I meant and I think he felt the same and anyone who loved Vic wants the same thing.

“At first I kinda hated you, I thought you'd steal him away from all of us or hurt him. I actually tried to steer him off the course but he wasn't interested in my ploys. So I gave up and told him to just go for it. When I got to know you and it made sense why he cared so much about you. There's no one else in the world that I would've wanted him to fall madly in love with Sav. You were the one for him.” Mike told me. I had never heard that story before and I guess, it closed some doors I never knew about but I was happy he told me.

“Thanks Mike, that means a lot to me.” I said softly and grabbed his hand. He squeezed it tight and wiped away another tear.
“Ahem.” Someone coughed to get our attention. We both looked up and I was shocked to see Ben standing in front of me.

“I'll leave you two alone.” Mike said politely, getting up and leaving me with Ben.

Ben sat down next to me and looked on ahead at the after party thing in front of us. “I'm really sorry Savannah.” He said quietly. “I know it's probably all you've heard this week and it's gonna be killing you but I am so fucking sorry. If I could take the pain for you I would. You don't deserve to lose the love of your life so early on in your life.” He shook his head.

“Look Ben, it's not the end of the world. Right now it's the end of my world but I'll pick myself up soon and I'll live. Thanks for your words and your concern though.” I put my hand on his arm and smiled at him as best as I could.

“You wanna go now?” He asked. I looked around the room and I realized it was time.

“Yeah, let's go.” I got up, Ben looped his arm with mine and we walked out of the room.

Mike, Tony, Jaime and Lynn were waiting outside at Tony's car. “Are we ready?” Jaime asked. We all nodded and got in the car.

Mike was holding the urn with Vic's ashes in it and sitting in the front seat. I sat in the back and watched the world pass us by. Vic's parents decided that we could scatter his ashes at the lake where we went camping last year.

The car was deathly quiet. No one wanted to say anything at all.

“You guys remember when Vic fell out the old apple tree when we were playing Star Wars one time?” Mike spoke up. Tony began laughing.

“He broke his arm and still wanted to keep on playing.” Tony chimed in. I couldn't help but laugh because it was a story that had been shared a few times over the past year.

“I remember the time when he accidentally dropped a jar of worms all over Stacy Fields in middle school. She screamed so much.” Jaime laughed.

“She kept squishing the worms into her hair and they were everywhere, oh my God.” Mike laughed so hard. It was the first time I had seen him laugh in a long time.

“Vic never failed to make us laugh with his stupid antics.” Tony shook his head as he drove.

“I always told my mom that if he got married that they'd need to give him like a set of rules of what not to do to his wife. I think I was like 6 when I did it.” Mike smiled ahead onto the road.

“I hope that he knows how much we will miss him, I won't go a day without thinking of his dumbass self.” Jaime shook his head from beside me. Lynn and Ben were squished up on the other side of me.

“I think he knew we all love him.” I said quietly.

The rest of the journey was spent with the guys telling more stories from their childhood while me, Lynn and Ben listened happily. I felt sick but I wanted to hear about his life. I wanted to know as much as I could.

“We're here.” Tony announced.

We all slid out of the car and Mike handed me the urn. I felt sad holding it but it was the closest I'd ever get to him again. “You ready for this?” Lynn asked me. Lynn grabbed a bag from the boot of the car while she spoke to me.

I nodded and we began to walk down towards the lake. Once down at the lake we all took our shoes and clothes off. I put the urn down next to me and we all got dressed into clothes we could go into the lake with. I put on Vic's favourite shirt. I picked the urn back up and we all walked into the lake. Everyone stood in a line with me in front of them.

“Okay, this is gonna be tough.” I laughed nervously. “So, when we were here the first time in September I think it was? Well I lost my fucking shoe and Vic offered to help me find it. We had a bit of an argument and then it was at that moment I kinda thought, maybe this guy's not that bad?” Everyone laughed a little at that. “To this day I don't think there's ever been anyone in my life that has pushed me the way that Vic has. I mean I feel so much more confident and happier about my life since I met him.” I smiled.

“He's a great guy.” Jaime nodded. I felt broken for him because they all knew him since they were kids.

“We may have only spent a little under a year together but that year will live with me for the rest of my life. Vic was the kinda person that you just don't forget. When we went to Boston with Lynn last year Vic told me that his goal in life was to have a big house, a dog and just to be successful. I told him that I believed he'd get that and I guess in a way, I feel bad that he never got to that part of his life yet but he was successful, I'll tell you that. He succeeded in being an amazing person, great friend and most handsome boyfriend. He was rich in life and his personality made everyone happy. Vic Fuentes may not be here in body but he is with us in spirit. He lives in all of us.” My voice began to break a little. I opened the urn and looked down at the water around my feet. “Be free now.” I said and let his ashes fall out into the water.

The ashes dissolved into the water almost instantly and were carried away. I don't know where the water for this lake led to but he was free. He was with nature now. Happy.

Notes

The end. Im very sorry if this killed everyone but I enjoyed this story. I enjoyed the ending because not that many fics end with the guy dying anymore. I just liked the idea that Vic made an impact on her life, short lived but important. I loved the story. I loved briefness of it. life has been difficult recently and this was my escape;

Let me know what you think, how the ending was for you? Thanks again.

Comments

@olobersykoswife
It killed me to write I hated doing it but not many do write that kinda shit. It was fun!

Colourfultears Colourfultears
5/26/16

omg i think my heart just broke in two this story made me fangirl so hard and then i was like super happy she was going back for him them BOOM im deaad!

The ending hurt so bad, but in all it was a great story (:

GABBYC GABBYC
4/4/16

My heart broke but I feel a sense of happiness too! :)

Gem_Jar93 Gem_Jar93
4/2/16

WHAT?!?!?!?!?!