The pact

*warning triggering* Vic's POV
I said there in a moment in shock while Luna was holding my arm. For a moment I couldn't think of what to do. The first thing what was going through my mind when my thoughts finally came back was: 'She'll live now. This is it. I've lost my only friend.'
Then I came back to my senses pulled my arm back and pulled the sleeve up. I kept silent while I looked the seat in front of me not daring to look at her. I wanted to run away from this place, but she was still sitting with her feet against the chair in front of her, blocking the way to the isle. I could almost feel her blue eyes digging in the side of my face, wanting to meet my eyes.
A few minutes of silence went by and I tried to hold back the tears that wear burning behind my eyes. I laid the back of my head on the seat and closed my eyes.
Eventually she broke the silence. 'I won't ask you to stop, because I know that won't work, but I do want you to know that I'm here for you.'
I looked up surprised and my eyes met hers. 'You're not gonna leave me?'
'Of course not.' she said not looking away. 'why would I? You're my friend.'
I kept looking at her with a surprised look. I couldn't believe she didn't run away. It even looked like she knew what she was talking about. Like she knew someone who did the same. I couldn't believe this girl, she was the best thing that happened to me in years.
And at that moment I fell in love with her. I could feel myself falling and there was nothing I could do about it. I couldn't act on it of course, because I would lose her if I did, but it did feel good.
She smiled a sad smile when she noticed my surprised look, swung her arms around my neck and hugged me. 'You deserve way more than this, Vic.' She whispered. 'You're not alone anymore, you don't have to do this anymore to yourself.'
At that moment the tears started rolling silently over my cheeks. I put my arms around her and we hugged for a at least two minutes not saying anything.
As she pulled away I stroke my sleeves against my cheeks, wiping away my tears.
'Are you ready to open up to me? or do you wanna wait for a while?' she asked taking my hands in hers.
I thought about it. To be honest I didn't want to talk about it with anyone. I know I had to, but there was just too much shame, too much confusion. I shook my head no.
'It's okay. I understand' she said. 'One day you'll. My best friend from England did it too...'
She looked to the ground for a while lost in thought.
'Oh what happened to her?' I asked.
'Well, she was bullied really bad as a kid, I guess that was a start point for her. But she never been very open about it either, but one day she just opened up to me and she blurted everything out. She's now trying to recover, but she has a hard time doing it. In a few days she will be 200 days clean. I'm so proud of her for that.'
200 days?! How did she manage that. My eyes went wide. That must've taken a lot of strength. 'Wow, that's incredible! I'm just not ready to recover I think...'I said and I looked away from her.
'That's okay.' she said rubbing my hands with her thumbs. 'One day you will be and then you'll do the same as her. But do me a favour, try to stay strong, I couldn't handle it to lose you.'

Luna's POV
When the sun started to go down me and Vic walked towards home. I was afraid my mom would be home so when we came to my door I hugged Vic, said goodbye and then he walked home.
When I walked through the door I noticed my mom wasn't home yet, but I was sure she would soon come home.
I looked to the ground and found a letter on the floor with my name on it. I picked it up and opened it to see Casey's handwriting .

Hey hottie,
I decided to send you a letter as it's more romantic and less expensive than calling. Although, I can't hear the sound of your sweet voice, I know this is better.
So how's San Diego, babe? Are there any hot boys there? If any of them are annoying, just say you're in a relationship with me, it's kind of true, since we're getting married and shit.
England fucking sucks like always. I hate the fucking people here and the stupid fucking weather and with you gone this country is my own personal hell.
The teachers are giving us way more homework than we can handle and I have to cycle to school for fucking one hour, because my dad stopped driving me to school. I just can't seem to find the time anymore to sit and relax and it causes me to have regular panic attacks.
But I'll just keep holding on like I always do, at least I try. I just don't want to disappoint anyone and certainly not you. I feel like I'm going to, though. The big '200 days' clean comes so close, too close. The days certainly go a lot slower than normal.
Wow, this letter got depressing. I'm gonna try to light up the mood. Remember the time we cycled back home from school, but we only had your bike and I sat on the back of the bike and you crashed into a car? Yeah, that memory always lights up the mood. I think I've never laughed so much in my entire life.
Well, babe, let me know about your life in the sunny San Diego. I'm incredibly curious.
Lots of kisses,
Casey

I needed to write back to her. I missed her so much, normally I would go to her to give her a hug went she felt like this. I hated that she felt this way, she was such an amazing person and just like Vic, she deserved so much more than that. At those moments I wondered why the world wasn't fair. Also, I needed to talk to her about Vic. I think I handled it well with him, but I still needed her opinion. Her opinion meant a lot to me.
I ran upstairs to my room and pulled a blank paper from underneath my chemistry books. I found a pen and started writing.

Casey!!!
I was so happy to hear from you baby! I miss you so much!
It hurts me a lot to read that you're not doing alright. If you want my advice (gonna give it whether you want it or not), stop counting. After you reached the 200 days, stop counting. Otherwise you always think of the numbers and how slow they go up, and that won't help you to stay clean.
Hold on baby, I'm sending lots of hugs with this letter!
Also, I kinda need your opinion on something. One of my best friends here, Vic, well, I discovered today that he self harms. I told him that I will be there for him if he is ready to talk about it or something, but I really don't know what else to do. Please give me advice in your next letter.
The rest of my life is somehow becoming stable. I'm starting to get used to the people and my classes. I made a few friends; Vic of course, and this girl called Jessie. I didn't like her at first, but she is actually pretty cool. And I've met three guys named: Jaime, Tony and Mike. They're really cool and they help me discover all this new music, I think I'm getting obsessed with music. And before you're going to ask, no I'm not dating any of them. You know how relationship went with me in the past. Well they didn't even happen at all, because well, love scares me I guess. I hate that so much about myself, I wish I could just love someone already.
My mom is constantly on my nerves. So yeah, that hasn't changed. I even think she is more observing and strict since we moved here. I hate it so much.
Well, I see you around Christmas!
lots of love,
Luna.

I sat on the ground in the garage of Tony's house. My back against the wall and my legs pulled up, my arms around them. Tony's garage looked at first side like a perfectly normally garage. There were tools, bikes, a car and in the left corner stood a closed jar of paint. There were no chairs or couches so I sat on the floor looking up to Tony, Mike and Jaime.
You see, the thing that was different about this place was the fact that the leftover space was filled with music instruments. Acoustic guitars, electric guitars, drums, basses, microphones and even a saxophone. Tony had told me with a proud smile that all of the guitars were his. There were at least 4 of them. The basses were from Jaime, who left them over here because they always jammed here anyway. The same goes for the drums, who were owned by Mike.
I never had seen something like this in my life. It was amazing.
And now I sad there on the floor, waiting for the guys to play. 'Come on guys, hurry!' I sat moving up and down with excitement.
'Calm down, Luna, perfection takes time.' said Mike smiling while he took his drumsticks out of an empty paint jar. He walked to his drums and winked at me as he sat down.
'You can't be that good.' I said rolling my eyes.
'Look out, dude!' Tony said pointing his finger at me. 'no insulting until the show is over. Do you know how lucky you are to be here? We never invite anyone here.'
'First, I'm not a dude. Second, I feel honoured.' I said smiling to him. 'By the way, who is gonna sing?'
'I am.' said Jaime while tuning his bass. He looked at me with a goofy smile.
My mouth fell open. 'You sing?'
He rolled his eyes. 'Why so surprised?' He said. 'I'm not that good, but someone has to do it and you don't want to hear Tony or Mike sing.'
Mike and Tony looked insulted and then started singing to piss Jaime off. They really were horrible. I put my hands on my ears. Tony saw it walked over to me and took my hands of my ears still singing really off pitch. I couldn't stop laughing.
'Okay guys, that's enough.' Jaime said laughing.
Mike put the tips of his fingers against the side of his head in a military gesture. 'yes sir.'
Jaime just responded by putting his middle finger up to him. I chuckled.
'Okay Luna, This is song is a classic.' Tony said grabbing his guitar. 'So this is another one for your music education. It came out nine years ago, released by one of the best bands ever. Unfortunately the singer died three years later. This is Smells Like Teen Spirit by nirvana.'
I repeated the song title a few times out loud to remember it. I had heard of the band before, though.
Then Tony's hands moved over the frets and an amazing melody sounded through the room. The acoustics were amazing. Suddenly Mike and Jaime joined in and it sounded so good. I never expected them to be this good.
My heart started beating faster. Hearing music live was so much more amazing than hearing it on the radio. The sound seemed to go right into my skin and Goosebumps appeared on my arm.
And then Jaime started singing. 'load up on guns, bring your friends. It's fun to lose and to pretend.'
He was good! And it was even more impressive to me that he sang while playing his bass without missing a single note.
The song went by too soon. At the end of it I was sad that it was over. While the last guitar note faded out I jumped to my feet and started clapping and cheering. It must've been a weird thing to see, because I was jumping up and down while clapping and cheering. My thoughts was confirmed by the boys laughing hysterically at me.
I walked over to Jaime and hugged him. For some reason my time spent in America made me way more comfortable with hugs. 'You were so good!' I said while letting him go.
Mike whistled. 'Jaime and Luna, sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G.' he sang.
I shoot an annoyed look to him. 'How old are you? Fourteen? Oh...wait.'
Jaime busted out in laughter.
'OOOOOH, SNAP!' Tony yelled while laughing.
Mike stared at me with an insulted face, but then started laughing. 'Wow, you're really the one with the good comebacks aren't you?' he said as he stood up from his drums and poked in my belly. I started hitting his hand again.
'Stop it!' I said. 'And yes, for a matter of fact I am. Probably because I had years of training from my best friend in England.'
'Do you miss it?' Tony said. 'England?' his face had turned to a serious look.
The good feeling all the laughing and the music had gave me were gone. 'Uhm, not really.' I said. 'I mean, I miss my best friend, Casey, and my grandparents, but apart from them, there's no one to go back to anymore. I kind of lost all my friends just before I got here.'
'What happened?' Jaime asked. I looked to his face and then to Mike's and Tony's. They all looked like they cared. I think they really did.
'Uhm, someone spread a rumour about me that I had kissed the boyfriend of one of my best friends and they all believed it. It wasn't true, but they didn't believe me. After that they all abandoned me, except for Casey.' I said.
'That's horrible.' Mike said with a tone in his voice I couldn't recognise. Had he made the link to what happened to Vic?
I shrugged. 'Well it happened. That's why I was actually quite happy to have a fresh start.'
Then Tony walked to me and put his arms around me. 'We wouldn't ever do that to you' he said. Then Jaime joined in and put his arms around me and Tony. 'Yeah we'll just give you hugs all the time.' he said and I laughed. 'Guys! I'm getting crushed!'
Then Mike walked towards us. 'Shall I help?'
I screamed. 'No!' but then Mike put his arms around me, Jaime and Tony.

Notes

Hey guys!!

So the Character of Casey is actually based on my real life best friend. She has the exact same personality and past story. I just wanna say that I'm incredibly proud of you, M. You're such an inspiration to so many people and you don't even seem to know it. I love you <3

xxxx

Nicky