You'd Better Hide the Bullets

It was 6 days until Christmas and I'm hoping the Vic won't come over on Christmas because that would just be a total downer. My cousins from LA were coming over for it and my grandparents from New York were flying over. It was gonna be a tight Christmas but if Vic makes an appearance then I think I might just hang myself with some mistletoe or some tinsel.

I couldn't help but feel completely out of spirit though, like it doesn't even feel like Christmas at all. Alex was currently in my room, playing guitar and singing to me. Not like he planned it but just singing songs and cute stuff towards me. Honestly I should be swooning right now, totally happy and content that my boyfriend is being really cute but I'm not. It scares me because Alex is really good for me and to me but all I seem to be doing is letting my mind wonder to Vic.

"Forgive me I'm trying to find my calling, I'm calling at night. I don't mean to be a bother but have you seen this girl." Alex sung softly as he sat in front of me on my bed. "She's been running through my dreams and it's driving me crazy it seems, I'm gonna ask her to marry me." He looked up at me. "Even though she doesn't believe in love, he's determined to call her bluff. Who could deny these butterflies? They're filling his gut." I watched his delicate hands dance over the chords of the song. "Waking the neighbours, unfamiliar faces. He pleads though he tries but he's only denied now he's dying to get inside." I watched his facial expressions as he sang the song, it seems as though it feels really personal when he's singing it. "Forgive me I'm trying to find my calling, I'm calling at night. I don't mean to be a bother but have you seen this girl? She's been running through my dramas and it's driving me crazy it seems, I'm gonna ask her to marry me." He suddenly stopped.

"That's really beautiful." I whispered to him, he placed the guitar down in between us.

"It's not finished yet, I have a lot to work on but its kinda eating me alive." He sighed, playing with the strings of his acoustic guitar.

"What's wrong?" I felt scared to ask. We haven't really gotten that deep and personal yet.

"I don't wanna upset you." He said softly. I put my hand on his and smiled as convincingly as possible.

"I'll be okay, just tell me what's wrong." I told him.

"I feel like you're not really in this relationship. I feel like you're kinda just floating on through and I don't really know if it's due to me or just the kinda person you are but its bumming me out a little. Is there something wrong?" He sounded so broken up explaining what was wrong with him. I felt a little piece of me die because I was the cause of it.

"I'm not gonna lie, okay yes I haven't been in this relationship 100% and it's due to so many complications in my life at the moment." I began to explain. "But it's not a reflection of you and it certainly doesn't mean I don't want to be in a relationship." With you. "I just need to get used to it, my last boyfriend cheated on me with my sister, I have a lot of insecurities that need to be deal with." I felt awful.

"Well we can take it slow Scarlett, I don't wanna lose you for something that can be easily fixed." He smiled to me, making me smile.

Maybe I need him? Maybe I need someone good in my life pushing me towards better things? I hope to God I don't break his heart. "I would love that, thank you." I grinned at him. A small part of me is saying I should break up with him but then a bigger part of me is saying that I need him.

-

Alex left about twenty minutes ago and I was sitting on my bed, silently enjoying the peace and quiet. I threw myself backwards onto my pillows and closed my eyes. "What are you doing?" I heard a voice ask. I opened my eyes and looked towards the direction of the voice.

"I'm enjoying the peace and quiet, well I was until now." I sat up and looked towards the door where Vic was now leaning against the doorframe.

"Oh how sweet, hey I heard your lover boy serenading you, how cute." He said with a fake smile.

"What is it that you want Vic?" I rolled my eyes at him. He sauntered into my room and walked over to the window ledge and climbed up, sitting there.

"Oh nothing, just wanted to chat." He said innocently. I raised an eyebrow, confused at his actions.

"Right, well I'd love to but you're an ass and I can't stand you so." I said folding my arms across my chest.

"Stop being such a damn bitch for no reason." He groaned at me. I watched his actions, he just seemed so laid back, like nothing bothered him at all.

"Have you ever tried being nice for once in your life?" I asked. He furrowed his eyebrows and sighed.

"I am nice, you just take things way too personally." He jumped off the window ledge then walked over to my bed, laying down across the bottom. "Let's play a game, never have I ever but instead of drinking we take off an item of our clothing." He suggested and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"You're such a pig, you know that." I rolled my eyes. He just lay there with an annoying grin on his stupid face.

"Don't try to deny that you like it." He smirked at me.

"I'm pretty much done with everything to do with you." I said with absolutely no emotion whatsoever.

"Fine, whatever." He huffed as he got up off my bed and walked over to the door. "You know, we can continue to play this game all you want but you know fine well that we are both just playing until we're bored. You know where I am when you decide to surrender." He cocked his head to the side and smiled at me. "Your pretty boy lover is not gonna satisfy you forever." I wanted to wipe the grin off his stupid face. I got up off my bed and marched over to him.

"Look, I know you love doing annoying little things to tear me apart but stop looking for something to have another shot at me for." I said sternly grabbing onto my door handle.

"Well..." He said looking me up and down. "You'd better hide the bullets." He smirked at me, walking backwards out of the room. I slammed the door shut and groaned loudly in frustration.

Notes

Okay so I'm getting into this story, a lot is still to come and I'm very appreciative of everyone who has stuck by this story and comments every time I post a chapter, you guys are the reason I continue writing this so enthusiastically. So if you are reading this itd mean the world if you subscribed, voted and comment :) thank you !