Worlds Over, Time to Die. Nothing Left but our Souls Inside.

*Jaime’s POV*

I was dead. I was as dead as Mike as his lifeless body lay on the floor of the attic with blood spewed everywhere. I was lifeless and emotionless - dead. Although, this feeling of lifelessness did not resonate with the rest of the group. They found new life in the new life of Ciel. Everyone wanted to be around the infant, and don’t get me wrong, so do I, but I did not get this same sense of temporary fulfilment as everyone else.

Mama Fuentes spoke to me outside the other day. She had told me that she wandered away from the house to get some air. To be alone and mourn the loss of her youngest son. She found me in my secret cemetery. She found me digging into the ground not with careful movements, but found me digging angrily and aggressively as it was an extension of the bitterness I had felt towards Mike’s suicide.

She and I sat on the tall rock I had used as shelter and looked towards the seemingly inert landscape. We didn’t say much too each other, only how much we loved and enjoyed the life of Mike. She reminisced some of Mike’s younger years. His first drum kit, his first gig with his brother as a band. She even reminisced the day he was born. How he was the first kid the doctor had ever seen to be born with a smile.

Mike was always happy and smiling.

But this world changes people.

No one knew I was digging graves or building a cemetery, nor did they know where the hell I spent most of my time. They thought I was out gathering stuff and fighting zombies because of how much blood I had splattered on my body when I returned. Though they were wrong. I had killed a zombie and stashed him nearby. I just smeared his blood on me to reduce suspicion. I also stole a heap of food from Kellin’s and stashed it near my mini cemetery too. When I bring it back, I just steal new food, or food people have forgotten about. And the cycle continues.

I was building a small cemetery, a good half an hour walk from Kellin’s place. I did not wish to bury my friends in this cemetery. I just wanted something to do that was away from everyone. I felt so crowded, so confined amongst everyone.

I used to love being around a sea of people.

But this world changes people.

I was at the house, with Vic, Tony and Mama Fuentes. We were up in the attic, staring at the sheet that covered the body of who once was Mike Fuentes. We were trying to organise a ceremony, a service for our brother. To bury him somewhere and finally put his life at peace.

I told them about my cemetery. I told them about the rock that would protect the grave I had built for him beside the tree that would shade his resting place. It would turn orange over autumn and bloom again in the spring and would resemble Mike’s blooming life. We had all agreed this would be perfect. Without even seeing it everyone knew it was perfect.

Together in silence we walked to what would now be Mike’s resting place. No words were said as we were silently mourning his loss. Vic, Tony and I had carried his body the entire way like pallbearers. We arrived at his site. Everyone was stunned at the beauty of this place, asking if I had built this. I replied yes, I had placed the rock and dug the grave and engraved Mike’s name with his birth and death date in a cross I had carved from a tree branch. I had used the old tin cans and strung them from the tree to the rock so he could not be disturbed. Their sad smiles told me that this was perfect.

We all made a speech about Mike. We talked of memories. His childhood, his teenage years, the years of touring and everything in between. There was not a dry eye amongst us. Though I was emotionless, I could only feel the searing pain of my best friend’s death. It only makes me think of when I was going through the same stage at the last house. We had blessed him and laid him to rest. I had shovelled the dirt into his new resting place.

Everyone had left but I remained. My heart had fallen to pieces. I was with my best friend again, though he was not physically here. I’m not superstitious, but Mike would never leave. He’s still here. And I can feel his presence. I can feel him tossing a drink towards me. I can feel him tapping his drumsticks on my shoulders and I can feel his arm laced over my shoulder as it usually would be. Mike is still here. He will always be here, whether that may be through Ciel or spirit, Mike will always be here, by my side.

I was dead. I was lifeless and emotionless. I was dead.

But this world changes people.

Notes

Hey guys. I'm sorry it's been so long since a Jaime installment. I've been focusing on my other works (Don't Lean On Me) if you haven't seen or heard of it, go read. :)

i promise i won't leave it this long next time.