Worlds Over, Time to Die. Nothing Left but our Souls Inside.
December 7, 2015- Danielle Perry
I had been sitting on the roof of the barn when I heard a noise below me. I jumped up and and quickly climbed down to see what it was. I had raised my knife ready to strike when I noticed it was only Mike. He was sitting against the barn with his head in his hands.
“Jesus Mike you scared the shit out of me, I nearly stabbed you,” I laughed nervously.
“It might be better than living in this world. I’m convinced this is hell,” he mumbled miserably. “It’s not that bad,” I said, taking a seat next to him. “We have everyone here. You have Alysha and Vic and you even have me,” I told him, resting my head on his shoulder.
Mike and I hadn’t been super close but we were close enough. Dating his brother and being best friends with his girlfriend meant we spent a lot of time together. Never during that time though had I ever thought of him in a romantic way. That was until the moment he grabbed my head in his hands and roughly kissed me. In that moment all I could think of was my desire to be touched. Mike filled everyone of those desires. His touches were like fire to my frozen skin. I lost all thought as he stripped me down and climbed on top of me. All I could think was how badly I had wanted, no needed human contact.
We didn’t make love, oh no that’s not was this was. This was both of us pouring our sorrows out on the other, him for losing his father and me for feeling like I had lost Vic. We fucked until both of us reached our climaxes. Mike had managed to bite one of my nipples and make it bleed and I had left bloody nail marks down his back. Neither of us worried about it really because we knew no one would see them.
We dressed and I went back to guard duty and he went back to whatever. Neither of us spoke of it again. Letting sleeping dogs lie.
Fucking Mike just had to go and drop that bomb. Now everyone knew about how I cheated on Vic. Now suddenly I am the bad person. Yeah I get it, I fucked up. I have felt horrible every since but Vic had been so distant it was almost like I was alone.
I had managed to make a little room in Kellin’s basement that is away from everyone. I stocked up on some food and stayed there for what felt like forever until I had to go get more food. It was then that Vic caught me.
He begged me to talk to him. He told me he wasn’t mad yet he went on yelling and slamming things around. This was the most human I had seen him since his father's death. Finally he was coming around but I feared it would be too late. I decided to break, I couldn’t control it anymore. One second I was just calm and fine ready to tell him, then I snapped. I guess all his yelling and slamming finally caught up to me. I didn’t care about his reaction or what anyone else thought.
"I'M PREGNANT, OKAY?! WAS IT SO FUCKING HARD TO WAIT UNTIL I WAS READY TO SAY ANYTHING? YOU FUCKING BASTARD." I yelled, making sure it was loud enough for everyone to hear.
I broke down then, exhausted both mentally and physically. Thank whatever is above that Katelynn was there. She grabbed my hand and took me to her room. I sobbed for what felt like hours until I got sick. Luckily she had been through this before and had a trashcan at the ready and held my hair back. She waited until I had calmed down to try and talk to me.
“How far along?” she asked. I shrugged.
“I found a test at a store on our way here. I took it after I couldn’t stop throwing up. It was positive. Either it’s Mike’s and I’m only about six months or it’s Vic’s and I’m 8 and ready to pop. I can’t tell. My body is just acting so strange. With all of this stress and the lack of food I’m surprised I haven’t lost it. I barely even have a bump,” I told her, lifting up my baggy shirt. I did have a slight bump but I hadn’t ballooned like most women would being this far along.
“Well you are a model and you were in good shape. Sometimes women never show,” she shrugged. She looked at me with concern, there was no judgment in her eyes, just pain. “What are you going to do?” she asked the question I had been asking for months.
“I don’t know,” I mumbled, looking at the floor.
“Well why don’t you get some rest and we will talk more later?” I nodded and she helped me back to the basement and kept everyone away from me.
---------
Now here I sit, alone and scared. I never wanted to hurt Vic but he turned me away and left me. I never meant for this to happen, I don’t even want to bring a child into this cold horrid world. Yet here I am with anywhere from less than a month to three months to figure out what to do. I can’t expect Vic or Mike to help so I am pretty much alone. I can only hope that something good will happen with all this bad shit going on.
I know that his baby won’t be easy for Kellin or Katelynn either, losing two of their own. I just don’t know anymore. I don’t want to be alone.
~Danielle
“Just hold out for tomorrow, Our dreams will follow, Follow us back to when, When nothing was broken, The future was open, Let's go back again”- All Time Low
“Jesus Mike you scared the shit out of me, I nearly stabbed you,” I laughed nervously.
“It might be better than living in this world. I’m convinced this is hell,” he mumbled miserably. “It’s not that bad,” I said, taking a seat next to him. “We have everyone here. You have Alysha and Vic and you even have me,” I told him, resting my head on his shoulder.
Mike and I hadn’t been super close but we were close enough. Dating his brother and being best friends with his girlfriend meant we spent a lot of time together. Never during that time though had I ever thought of him in a romantic way. That was until the moment he grabbed my head in his hands and roughly kissed me. In that moment all I could think of was my desire to be touched. Mike filled everyone of those desires. His touches were like fire to my frozen skin. I lost all thought as he stripped me down and climbed on top of me. All I could think was how badly I had wanted, no needed human contact.
We didn’t make love, oh no that’s not was this was. This was both of us pouring our sorrows out on the other, him for losing his father and me for feeling like I had lost Vic. We fucked until both of us reached our climaxes. Mike had managed to bite one of my nipples and make it bleed and I had left bloody nail marks down his back. Neither of us worried about it really because we knew no one would see them.
We dressed and I went back to guard duty and he went back to whatever. Neither of us spoke of it again. Letting sleeping dogs lie.
Fucking Mike just had to go and drop that bomb. Now everyone knew about how I cheated on Vic. Now suddenly I am the bad person. Yeah I get it, I fucked up. I have felt horrible every since but Vic had been so distant it was almost like I was alone.
I had managed to make a little room in Kellin’s basement that is away from everyone. I stocked up on some food and stayed there for what felt like forever until I had to go get more food. It was then that Vic caught me.
He begged me to talk to him. He told me he wasn’t mad yet he went on yelling and slamming things around. This was the most human I had seen him since his father's death. Finally he was coming around but I feared it would be too late. I decided to break, I couldn’t control it anymore. One second I was just calm and fine ready to tell him, then I snapped. I guess all his yelling and slamming finally caught up to me. I didn’t care about his reaction or what anyone else thought.
"I'M PREGNANT, OKAY?! WAS IT SO FUCKING HARD TO WAIT UNTIL I WAS READY TO SAY ANYTHING? YOU FUCKING BASTARD." I yelled, making sure it was loud enough for everyone to hear.
I broke down then, exhausted both mentally and physically. Thank whatever is above that Katelynn was there. She grabbed my hand and took me to her room. I sobbed for what felt like hours until I got sick. Luckily she had been through this before and had a trashcan at the ready and held my hair back. She waited until I had calmed down to try and talk to me.
“How far along?” she asked. I shrugged.
“I found a test at a store on our way here. I took it after I couldn’t stop throwing up. It was positive. Either it’s Mike’s and I’m only about six months or it’s Vic’s and I’m 8 and ready to pop. I can’t tell. My body is just acting so strange. With all of this stress and the lack of food I’m surprised I haven’t lost it. I barely even have a bump,” I told her, lifting up my baggy shirt. I did have a slight bump but I hadn’t ballooned like most women would being this far along.
“Well you are a model and you were in good shape. Sometimes women never show,” she shrugged. She looked at me with concern, there was no judgment in her eyes, just pain. “What are you going to do?” she asked the question I had been asking for months.
“I don’t know,” I mumbled, looking at the floor.
“Well why don’t you get some rest and we will talk more later?” I nodded and she helped me back to the basement and kept everyone away from me.
---------
Now here I sit, alone and scared. I never wanted to hurt Vic but he turned me away and left me. I never meant for this to happen, I don’t even want to bring a child into this cold horrid world. Yet here I am with anywhere from less than a month to three months to figure out what to do. I can’t expect Vic or Mike to help so I am pretty much alone. I can only hope that something good will happen with all this bad shit going on.
I know that his baby won’t be easy for Kellin or Katelynn either, losing two of their own. I just don’t know anymore. I don’t want to be alone.
~Danielle
“Just hold out for tomorrow, Our dreams will follow, Follow us back to when, When nothing was broken, The future was open, Let's go back again”- All Time Low
Notes
It seems I have not vanished! I live I promise! Writers block, school, and work are all a bitch then you mix it with depression and it makes life hard. However, here I am!
What do you guys think about this? Better yet, who do you think the father is? Mike or Vic?
These are the real questions.
Hope ye enjoyed!
Peace. Love. Drama.
~Raz
No not from VA just spent.a half hour researching beforehand. So glad you like it! And sorry about your heart, we feel your pain as well trust me, sometime we hate doing this to ourselves!
8/5/16