I opened an eye and glanced at Vic, then closed it again. It felt like my whole face was burning and even though there was a wet cloth placed on my forehead, I had the feeling that the water was literally steaming away. I let out a soft moan to get his attention.

He immediately rushed to the bed and leaned over me, worried expression on his face.

“Kellin? What is it, are you okay?”, he gently touched my cheek with his fingers.

“Except that I have fever and am trying hard not to throw up again…?”, I slowly said and smiled weakly. “Not really. Whatever… Did you find something…?”

“I think so, yeah…” Vic lied next to me, reached and grabbed his laptop. “Here, this website says that first of all, we must keep you from dehydrating. You know, from all that vomiting and diarrhea, and such…”

“Yeah, yeah, right.”, I interrupted him, frowning. “What else?”

“Well…”, he furrowed his eyebrows at the screen. “You should drink a lot of liquids, and you shouldn’t eat any solid food…”

“No shit.” I rolled eyes. “In case you haven’t noticed, I can’t eat.”

“Hey, I know, I’m just telling you what I read here. Generally, all websites I checked say that in your case we should consult a doctor, but I don’t think it’s a good idea, you know. By the moment most people in the country know of us.”

“True…”, I sighed. “Oh well.”

We fell into silence, broken only by Vic typing something on his computer.

“Later I’ll go get you some medication.”, he spoke up again. “But first I wanna make sure you’re doing well enough.”

“Mm. I’m fine.”, I murmured and looked up at him, meaningfully fixing my eyes on the bandage on his head. “How about you, you alright?”

“Yup.”, he shrugged. “I’m absolutely great, my head only hurts a little, but I’m much better than before.”

“Liar. You’re only saying that because you don’t want me to worry.”

“Maybe, maybe not. You can’t know for sure.”, Victor winked at me.

“Asshole. How dare you lie to your boyfriend.”, I pretended to be very offended and lightly poked him in the waist, but I doubt he felt anything at all, considering how weak I was at the moment.

“It’s because I’m a badass bastard, y’know.”, he chuckled, leaned in and lightly kissed my dry lips. I barely felt it. My whole face felt numb and hot from the fever and dehydration.

He pulled back with a smile, gently brushed my hair back, then concentrated on his computer. I tried to look at the screen – he had opened a webpage, but because of my condition all I could read was the big dark “Food Poisoning – Treatment.”

Food poisoning. Food poisoning. Could this be possibly more stupid?! I thought I was dying, and what did it turn out to be? Just fucking food poisoning.

“I really should have stayed vegetarian.”, I groaned. “Well, one thing is for sure. I’ll never try Chinese food again, especially from a small roadside restaurant.”

“Definitely. It’s dangerous.”, Vic frowned. “Dammit, man, you scared the crap outta me.”

“I scared the crap outta myself, too.”, I admitted. “I totally panicked.”

“In my opinion you were pretty calm for a person, who thinks he’s dying.”, he noted, grinning slightly.

“Oh, deep inside I was screaming, believe me.”

He just sighed and got up. “Yeah, I bet so. Be right back.”

“Where are you going?”, I tried to sit up.

“To get you water.”, Victor announced. “You stay here and don’t move.

“No, I don’t want water, it would make me feel sicker…”, I started complaining.

“What, you want to dehydrate and die?”, Vic interrupted me, crossing arms. “Right now is possibly the worst moment to be stubborn, Kellin, just listen to me and do what I tell you to. I might not be a doctor and maybe you need some more professional help, but I’m the best you have. Just sayin’.”

Before I could object again, he disappeared in the kitchen. I sighed. I knew he was right, of course, and I knew that the only way I’d get better was if I listened to him. Fun how we always seemed to save each other, all the time. I smiled a bit. It was good to know that someone’s there to look out for you.

…So, I think I must explain what happened last night… Once I managed to stop vomiting and freaking out, with some help from Vic, we figured out that it just can’t be my sickness’ fault. We compared the symptoms and found some big differences that clearly showed that the reason for my… uncomfortable situation must be something else. And then I remembered the meat in that restaurant and how weird it tasted. Shit. I really shouldn’t have eaten that.

After some more thinking and analyzing the facts (and a few more throwing up fits on my part), we got to the conclusion that I got food poisoning. How dumb is that?!

Soon Vic returned with a glass of water, humming something absent-mindedly.

“Here ya go. You better sit up, though, ‘cause you might accidentally spill the water over yourself.”, he warned me and carefully removed the wet cloth from my forehead, then touched my skin, to check my fever. “Oh, Kell, I think you’re a bit better! Your fever has almost disappeared.”

“Good.”, I smiled slightly and sat up, which only made my stomach scream for mercy louder. I frowned but forced myself to keep what was left from my digested food inside my system.

“Open your mouth.”, Vic ordered as he held the glass to my lips.

I rolled eyes. “Vic, I’m not two. I can drink by myself.”

He simply ignored me.

“Take small, frequent sips. Don’t drink it all at once, because you’d feel sick. C’mon.”

I sighed dramatically and opened my mouth, letting him direct me. I almost choked at the first sip, but then slowly drank the rest. Once the cup was empty, my boyfriend smiled.

“Awesome. I’ll wait a few minutes and then give you another one.”

I nodded.

“Thanks… Thank you, Vic. For doing all this for me.”, I looked up at him and smiled.

“Nah, don’t. It’s the least I can do.”, he wiped a small drop of water off of my lip, smiling as well. I giggled softly and we went silent for awhile, just watching each other, thinking.

“I heard you, earlier…”,Victor suddenly spoke up.

I tilted head, not understanding what he’s talking about.

“Heard me? When? What do you mean?”

“When you were having a nightmare.”, he said quietly. “You were talking in your sleep.”

“Oh…”

Shit… Shit, shit, shit, shit… I shuddered, but I wasn’t sure if it was because of the food poisoning or because of the horrible memory of that dream, which was actually a memory itself… I felt so pathetic for letting my fear show, for even speaking about it now. It was a subject I liked to keep aside, hidden from the others, something that only I should know. A painful mark in my past, which had to remain there, buried behind all my other, newer, happier memories.

“How much did you hear…?”, I spoke hesitantly.

“Enough for me to understand what you’re dreaming about.” Now Victor’s face was concerned and serious. “Kellin… If you want to talk about it…”

I shook my head.

“…Not really. But I feel like I need to.”

“You don’t need to do anything you don’t want to do. If you want to keep this to yourself, I wouldn’t mind it…”

“No, no, I think I want you to know. I mean, considering the things that happened the last 24 hours, it would be no wonder if I die the next day.”, I chuckled. “So I might not have the chance to tell you some other time.”

“Don’t say that.”, Vic frowned. “We both know you’re gonna be alright, don’t over-dramatize.”

“Okay, okay.”, I waved my hand. “Whatever. Anyway…”, I paused. All of a sudden, this strange fear had overtaken me, not allowing me to talk. What if when I started talking about it I had another flashback? What if it brings me more nightmares the next night? What if, what if, so many what if’s…

Vic was just watching me patiently, expecting me to continue. I took a deep breath.

“I often have those nightmares…”, I slowly started. “…where he’d hurt me again, my father… Most of them are actual memories, like, flashbacks, but so realistic, so clear, that for a moment I forget they’re not real… When I think back now, maybe he wasn’t such a terrible person, he just basically went through hell, his life was tough, and the alcohol would make him take it all out on me… Sometimes he’d stay sober for days and nothing bad would happen. Other times, though, he didn’t even need a particular reason to hit me, he just made up one, for example that the beer I brought him wasn’t cold enough, or that it was too cold, or some other dumb shit like that. In eleventh grade I was dating this girl, Clara, my first real girlfriend. One night we were out late, just walking around, talking, stuff like that, and when I finally went home my dad was pissed. Turned out he’d be waiting for me to cook the dinner, but I had totally forgotten, because Clara and I had eaten outside. He was so angry that I was late that he pushed me and ended up seriously beating me. In the end I was so covered in bruises that I couldn’t go to school the next couple of days. I think my dream was about that night. I don’t know why, but my mind seems to often choose this scene for my nightmares. Perhaps it particularly scared me, because that was when I got my first punch in the face from him and it got me unprepared, it quite shocked me, really. I knew my dad was a violent drunk, but I never thought he’d seriously hurt me… That was before the incident with the broken bottle I told you about earlier, though. After it, I learned that I can expect everything from him. Nothing would surprise me.”

I stopped and looked at Vic. I couldn’t tell if he was sad, sympathetic or interested.

“I don’t want you to be sorry for me, so don’t say anything.”, I quickly added.

“I know.”, he nodded. “…What happened with Clara?”

“When I finally went back to school it turned out her parents had decided to go on a holiday and they had taken her with them. When they came back a few weeks later, for some reason she was acting a bit fake and cold, and at first I couldn’t understand why she did that. Later I found out that there, whatever the place they had went to was, she had met another boy, and yeah…”

“Damn, I’m s-” He caught himself on time and stopped, remembering what I had just warned him. “Erm, I mean, good for me, I guess, that you didn’t get together. After all, imagine, what if you two fell in love and got married and all? Then I’d still be a lonely, bored, single office worker in Terrance’s company.”, he chuckled.

His comment made me grin a bit. How did he do that? He always managed to cheer me up.

“Yeah. Lucky you that you have such a clever, badass boyfriend now, hm?”, I joked.

A sort of relieved smile appeared on his face, seeing me smile. “Totally.” He stood up again. “And is that clever, badass boyfriend ready for another glass of water?”

“Sure.”, I shrugged. I wasn’t feeling that bad anymore, once my headache and fever weren’t as strong. “I shall bravely drink it.”

“Okay, wait here.”

“Not that I can go anywhere else…”, I murmured ironically as I watched him rush into the kitchen once more.

The second glass seemed easier to drink and didn’t make me want to throw up immediately. I suppose that was a sign I was getting better. The whole time Vic was talking to me, trying to sound like an experienced doctor, and commenting everything I did with long, complicated (and imaginary) medical terms. He was being so silly and hilarious that I couldn’t help but burst into laughter.

“Oh god, stop giggling, you’re gonna choke again.”, he laughed a bit. “…Damn. I bet this is because your sioninionus vredsitinius isn’t functioning right. We’ll have to take some safety precautions. Hmmm. I think we’ll need to rensiclavinate or strubsticranate it. It definitely needs an operation, though.”

“Stop inventing long weird words, Vic, you’re failing.”, I chuckled, drinking what was rest of the water.

“Shut up, we both know you’re having fun watching me make a fool of myself.”

“That’s true. But I gotta admit, you’re making an adorable fool.”, I grinned.

“Bitch, I already know that.”, Victor winked at me, then took the glass from me and left it on the bedside table.

“Who’re you callin’ a bitch, asshole?”, I tried to sound threatening, but at the moment I was feeling too shitty for this, so I pretty much left the impression of a mosquito trying to scare off a tiger.

“You, jerk.”, Vic lightly punched my shoulder, teasing me. Amused, I pushed his fist away, giggling again.

“Oh, I thought I was a bitch?”, I raised an eyebrow.

“Hmm… You’re a bitchy jerk.”, he concluded. “But you’re my bitchy jerk, so you’re perfect to me.”

He sat more comfortably on the bed and moved closer so he could hug me. I rested my head on his shoulder.

“Kellin?”, Vic spoke again, now serious.

“Yeah? What is it, Vic?”, I looked up at him.

“Would you mind if we go back to the previous subject, I have a question I need to ask you.”

What? I took a moment to remember what we had talked about previously… Oh. Right. My father. Even though that was the last thing I wanted to discuss right now, I nodded.

“Sure.”

“Where is he now? You said he’s the last person on The List.”

So that was it. I bit my lower lip, glad he didn’t ask me more about the beating.

“…Oh. Um… He’s still in Medford, where we’re going. The place where I grew up…”

“Great, so what are we gonn-”

“…Six feet under.”, I added.

“…gonna do t- Wait.”, he blinked. “…What?”

“He’s long gone. Y’know? RIP. Kicked the bucket. Pushed up the daisies. Bought the farm.. Went to meet his Maker.”, I sighed at his confused expression. “He’s dead, Vic.”

“Yeah, I got that back at ‘six feet under’.”, he rolled eyes. “I don’t understand, though, you said he’s on The List? Then how, if he’s already passed away?”

“I never said anything about hurting or killing him.”, I shrugged. “Even if he was alive, I still wouldn’t harm him.”

…Not because I was such a good person, I thought. Only because I was still afraid of him, even after all these years, even after his death. Still afraid.

Gosh, I was such a coward.

Vic was watching me curiously now, and I could tell he’s trying to read my expression. I put on the serious, determinate, thoughtful mask on my face, trying to hide my actual thoughts. I think he knew how I felt, though. It was amazing how well he got to know me for such a short amount of time. He was basically the person, who knew the most about me, sometimes I thought he knew me better than I knew myself, and maybe that was true, because his point of view wasn’t that subjective.

However, knew it or not, he didn’t comment.

“Then what are we gonna do? What’s the plan?”, he scratched his forehead under the bandage, frowning.

“Don’t do that, what do you want, an infection?”, I lightly slapped his hand, making him stop, then my voice softened as I answered his question: “This time’s a bit different than the others. There are… no people involved. I’m doing it this more for me than for the others, y’know. The first four men on The List, their cases got famous for two reasons. One, basically, they’re all rich. And two, they’re human beings, with human rights, and there are other people, who care about them.”

“I still don’t quite see where you’re going with this.”, Victor insisted. “Explain.”

“What I meant was that what I’m gonna do wouldn’t mean anything to anyone else. They wouldn’t even know it was me who did it, they might think it was an accident or something. I’m just gonna return to my home for one last time…”

“And that’s all? Really, th-”

“…and destroy it.”, I finished, staring darkly down at the white sheets. “People die and attract attention. But buildings burn every day, right? It’s nothing special. It’s just something that would mean a lot to me and nothing to the others, this action. This time it’s not about moral, money, or screwing someone up, it’s about sentiment. In this house I spent the worst years of my life. So I want it gone. I want to burn all my memories about it, everything that connects me to it, and hopefully…”, I let out a deep sigh. “…hopefully I’d finally feel free.”

“Alright, I like the idea.”, Vic clapped his hands enthusiastically. “Let’s burn the motherfucker!”

“Easy there, let’s heal first.”, I laughed a bit. “We must concentrate on getting better, and then think about burning motherfucker-houses.”

“Right.”, he chuckled too. “Which makes me think, I must go get you some medication, as promised. You stay here, drink water, and don’t throw up, okay? I’ll be back soon.”

“Okay, okay, and I’ll try my best.”, I grinned slightly. “Also, take the gun, in case they ask you for a prescription.

“Already took it.”, he winked, then gave me a quick kiss, put a cap on to hide his bandage and left me alone. For a moment the whole room fell into silence… before my stupid stomach broke it.

“Oh, shut the fuck up, you.”, I murmured.

END OF CHAPTER 19.

Notes

Okay, so this one turned out a little short and not that interesting, but I had to clear some things. It's pretty much a filler, meant only to give information. The real action's gonna happen after one chapter (which means in chapter 21), shit's about to get real. I'm considering adding a funny chapter, too, but I'm not sure... What do you think?

Also, used this as a reference for food poisoning: [link]
There are a few references to some songs, but I'm too lazy to write them. XD
The "medical expressions" Vic uses are not real, I just randomly came up with them.

Oh, and I'm sorry if there are any typos and stuff, I'm almost sure there are, but I'm too tired to check, sorry.